Dear Diary,

I wasn't sure at first if he would even answer the phone when I called him, but he did and was surprisingly okay with the idea I had in mind and told me to meet him at the 'new' new Avengers facility (the one we built after Thanos destroyed the last one) in an hour.

—————

"Thank you, Tony, so much for doing this," I turned the car off and approached him, shaking his hand.

"Of course," he replied. "Anything for the man who brought me and countless others back from the dead. Barnes," he greeted Bucky.

"Tony," he shook his hand, too.

I smiled. "So, what's the plan?"

"Well, we still have your suit," he began, walking us through the doors leading into the facility that had been identical to the one that had stood there before it. "But, we never made one for Barnes because at the time, well, he didn't exist... so, I looked through his stats and, since he won't be fighting in it like the rest of us had been, he'll probably fit in Sam's, Rhodes', or mine."

We approached a locked metal case where Tony opened it with his eye scanner to reveal the hand-pieces that would forge the suits. "Sounds good to me."

Tony grabbed mine and handed it to me. "Barnes, I'll give you Sam's," he headed it to him. "It seems like the closest fit."

"Thanks," Bucky replied, taking it with a smile. "But, I still don't really know how this all works."

"Don't worry, it's not that bad," I replied as we followed Tony to the somewhat smaller device he had rebuilt in his spare time that I had used to return the stones.

"Yea," Tony added. "It really isn't. You won't even realize it's happening until it's over- and I'll be sure to explain it all beforehand."

"Okay," Bucky answered reluctantly.

"So, you place the hand-piece on your hand like so," he placed his own that he'd taken from the cabinet on his hand and we followed his instructions and demonstration. "This grey button on top equips the suit with ease," he clicked it and his suit surrounded him without the helmet. "Like this. The other button, the green one, equips the helmet. The red button is the one that'll bring you back to the future if you wanna come back earlier than I can pull you back."

"So, how long will we be there, then?" Bucky wondered.

"For you? A few hours, between two and six preferably, I'll let you guys decide. For me, it'll be no more than ten seconds."

"Buck, what're you thinking?" I asked.

"I think five hours would be enough time, right?" he came back.

"Alright, five hours it is," I agreed.

"Okie dokie," Tony replied, walking over to the switch board and programming everything in. "You guys will stand on the platform and I'll count down when you're about to go."

"Where will it be taking us, exactly?" I asked as we stepped up onto the platform.

"Well, where - and should I say when - are you trying to go?" Tony returned.

I looked at Bucky, who I hadn't told any of this to yet. "Uh, Brooklyn Heights; July 4, 1936. The address is 569 Leaman Place."

"Oh, okay, by the Brooklyn Bridge," Tony remarked. "I'll have you teleported back to what is now the Cadman Plaza Park just off of what is now Cadman Plaza West at 9:00am on July 4, 1936. Does that sound like what you wanted?"

"It's perfect," I smiled. "Thank you so much."

"Yea, yea, you can thank me in ten seconds," he joked. "Ready?"

I looked at my hand and equipped the suit and helmet, Bucky doing the same. "Ready," Bucky said.

"Me too," I added.

"Three," he started. "Two... one-"

Everything flashed white and, like that, we were gone.

We appeared on the street as I knew it: Fulton Road. The wooded region behind us had yet to be named Cadman Plaza Park and was simply known as the park to those of us that lived and grew up here.

We both immediately unequipped our suits so that we wouldn't stand out... though, our 2025 'modern' clothes might do that for us anyway.

"We might wanna get a change of clothes," I added. "I completely forgot that when we travelled back in time the last time, we wore our old suits. Jeans, though, nowadays... that's not something we'd be wearing."

"Damnit, I forgot my phone was in my pocket, too," Bucky pulled out a slate of clear glass from his back pocket. "We definitely didn't have iPhone 15 Pro's back in '36, huh?"

"Yea," I chuckled. "You should probably put that away."

"I should probably just fucking take my bionic left arm off, too," he laughed. "We need clothes to hide all this; you brought money, right?"

"I did, luckily. Let's go," I said, putting my 'future items' away and walking briskly to the closest store. We did not think this through.

"Maybe you should go in by yourself," Bucky commented, waving his bionic arm at me. "You know what I used to wear- oh, and get me a pair of gloves, too."

I smiled. "Be right out," I answered, walking in and grabbing everything I needed like it was second nature and headed out.

Before doing anything further, I approached a stand-up metal newspaper box and picked up one of them. "The New York Times," I read to him, looking up and meeting his smile with my own. "New York, Saturday, July 4, 1936- "Roosevelt Urges New Park Areas To Correct 'Tragedy of Waste,'" "Clashes in League Hold Up Disposal of Ethiopian Issues," "Recognition Causes Split," "Nations Agree Only on Quick End of Sanctions, Although Mexico Shows Disapproval"... We're at the height of the '36 election, the Remington Rand strikes, the use of business machines- God, I can't believe we're really here."

His smile couldn't get any bigger. "You better keep that for later," he referred to the paper. "And, I'd love to chat, really, I would, but we're on a timer and we're not exactly dressed like we're from the '30s right now... we've been getting some odd looks from passers by."

"Right, right," I agreed. "Sorry... let's go."

He took his clothes from my hands and we ducked into an alleyway to change. "This isn't sketchy at all," he commented as we started stripping off our clothes.

"Okay, just do it quickly," I replied, trying not to laugh.

When we were done, we stashed our clothes in the briefcase I'd bought and prepared to go.

"Don't look at anyone and don't draw attention to us," I told him. "We're only a few blocks away, and we can't be seen."

"How's anyone gonna 'not notice you' in that tight, sexy ass button down and those surprisingly hot suspenders," he chuckled. I glared at him. "Okay, alright, I'll be careful... but what if we run into ourselves? It's the middle of the day and we live here."

"Right, but don't you remember what day?"

"Your birthday, 1936. You turned," he thought for a second. "18... oh my God, we're in upstate New York right now in the damn woods."

"Picked today on purpose, you know," I replied.

"I gotta hand it to you, that was pretty smart," he answered. "Let's get going, then."

We started making our way down the street, blending in entirely other than Bucky's hair, which we had to slick back and put a hat over.

"This feels amazing," I pointed out. "I finally feel like I'm not the man out of time anymore."

"Agreed, it's incredible," he said. "Everything is exactly as I remember it."

"James?" a woman announced, astonished.

He looked over and so did I, but I immediately pulled my hat down over my eyes and leaned against a building. He could pull off being huge and buff a lot easier than the likes of me, so I let him take this one on all alone- and he understood.

I peered at them from the distance to see what was going on and listened in on their conversation.

"James!" they called again as he tried to act like he hadn't heard them the first time.

"Oh... good morning ladies," he addressed them.

"Don't you remember me?" the ginger haired woman replied.

"Of course I do, Delores," his voice lilted. I knew he was pretending, but I couldn't hide the fact that I wanted to punch that bitch in the face.

"This is Catherine, if you haven't met," she introduced her brown haired friend.

"Oh, uh," Bucky tried to remember what year that party was and if he really had or hadn't met her yet. "I believe I do recall meeting Catherine once, though, I may be mistaken."

"No, I... don't believe we have had the pleasure to meet just yet. I would have remembered meeting someone as handsome as yourself," she replied. "But, that's quite alright. I have a terrible memory as well, and it truly is delightful to have made your acquaintance."

"Truly," Bucky replied.

"Where's that... sickly, runt of a friend of yours?" Dot pondered, looking around. "What was his name again? St- Stanley, was it?"

"That would be Steven," I jumped in, pulling off my hat and walking over, towering over her. She said nothing and just looked at me in awe. "How wonderful it is to see you again, Dot."

"My goodness," she sputtered. "I thought you were-"

"Smaller? I've heard that one before," I answered.

"Well," she began, the agitation in her voice clear as day. "Perhaps the frequency of such a statement is simply a reflection of how those around you view your personality: feeble and... frail," she took a jab at me.

"At least I have a personality," I answered. "Now, ladies, I don't mean to rush off in a hurry, but James and I have somewhere to be. Please excuse us," I placed my hand on his shoulder and dragged him away, leaving them to gawk from behind us.

As soon as we were far enough away, Bucky shoved me. "Are you out of your damn mind?"

"Oh, come on, I've been wanting to say something to that heartless vamp for decades," I replied.

"Okay, fine, but at this point in this timeline, she barely knows me," he reminded me. "Remember that party that she invited us to? That's not until 1938; 2 years from now, Steve."

"Too late to take it back now," I snickered. "And, it's no matter, really- at least compared to the fact that they both just saw me at peak condition, 240 pounds and 6 foot 2 when at this point in this timeline, I'm still a 95 pound, 5 foot 4 asthmatic with scoliosis, heart arrhythmia and partial deafness."

"Okay, you make a fair point," he laughed as we turned the corner onto the next street. "Wait, what are you even going to say to Sarah when we get there?"

"I have no idea," I replied. "I'm pretty good at coming up with stuff like that on the spot, though."

"I guess you're right," he answered. "But, are... you gonna tell her?"

"She already knows."

We made our way through the front entrance way of the complex and headed over to our place, which, is the exact same one we're at in 2025.

I knocked on the door when we finally arrived at 569, stepped back, and waited.

The door creaked slowly open and I nearly started to cry instantly when I laid eyes on her.

She said nothing at first, then met eyes with me and stuttered to get the words out. "S- Steven? Is... that you?"

"Yea, mom, it's me," I replied, realizing that had been the first time I had said the word mom to her face in almost 90 years.

"I got the note, but, I thought you weren't coming back until dinner and... how, in God's name, are you doing that?" she asked, referring to my stature.

"Well, it's kind of a long story," I started.

"Then, you both must come inside," she stepped aside and opened the door.

I walked past her and smelled her perfume for the first time in what's felt like forever. We both sat at the couch and she sat in the armchair next to it.

"His name is Dr. Erskine," I started. "He helped me and did this to my body in 1939."

"Did?" she asked. "But, 1939 hasn't happened yet."

"What Steve means to say," Bucky interrupted. "Is that we're from the future- and we aren't trying to scare you by saying this, but... we actually live 90 years into said future."

"How do you both still look so young, then? That would make you over a hundred years old," she wondered.

"It's a long story, mom," I replied, looking at my watch and seeing that it was already 12:00. "And we're only here for another two hours."

"Then you'd better start explaining," she chuckled.

And, so, I went on to explain how I was chosen by the Doctor and how I became Captain America, how I thought Bucky died and how I met Peggy Carter. Then, we talked about Bucky and briefly talked about HYDRA and S.H.I.E.L.D. then The Avengers. We told her of the future she'd never see and how we got there, through ice for the both of us... we told her of The Attack on New York and about Thor and the Guardians and the Civil War after Sokovia and... the Snap, then bringing everyone back and Thanos and everything, practically.

Then, on to more interesting matters, of course.

"So, you're both superheroes?" she rephrased all of that into one sentence.

"You could say we used to be," Bucky replied. "We've retired at this point- unless another mad titan tries to take over the universe again and throws us back into it."

"How lovely," she smiled. "I'm happy that you two have found your own paths- and each other, again, too."

"About that," I started. "You know, and I know you do. I'm not sure if you've written that letter yet, but-"

"I have," she replied. "I wrote it when I first found out I had contracted Tuberculosis. And I do know, yes. I always have."

"You never said anything, mom, why?"

"Because I knew you would have been petrified knowing your living mother with whom you shared a house knew about your deepest secret."

"You're probably right," I answered. "But, just knowing that you were okay with me being... you know-"

"Queer," she jumped in. "Yes, Steven, let me tell you now that you're aware fully of who you are as well as I am- I've always known you were queer and I've always known you loved James and that he loved you. I have always loved you for it and for your bravery about it. It was never something that bothered me or caused me to think of you any differently- and that's what everyone else in this day and age is seeming to get wrong. If they truly believe that God made all things and all people, how is being queer excluded from that and somehow null the fact that you are one of His children? How can someone who believes God is perfect and makes no mistakes believe that loving one's same sex is a choice? Certainly not I, no, I believe God made you this way for a reason, both of you. You were made for each other - you are kindred spirits - and I hope you see it as well as I do."

Bucky smiled at me and at her. "I always knew you were wise, Mrs. Rogers, but not like that. That was beautiful."

"Thank you," she replied. "But, I must ask... how, truly, is the future in terms of you both being together?"

"It's allowed then, being gay as we call it modernly," I answered. "Society has changed, especially after The Snap and after everyone lost people they loved... we all became, somehow, more accepting and more willing to change for a better world. It's made a huge difference on my and Bucky's lives because, well, we just learned of all this."

"It's true," Bucky jumped it. "It's technically been allowed for a lot longer than we expected; since before the year 2000 arrived, there were changes brewing. Now, though, in 2025, it's fully accepted everywhere the United States and most other countries globally."

"Goodness! That's wonderful," she cheered, standing. "I'm so incredibly happy for you boys."

We stood with her and I hugged her, finally. She melted into my arms like I always used to do when I hugged her back then. Bucky hugged her next, even if it was a lot shorter lived.

"When must you go?" She asked anew, almost saddened by the idea.

I checked my watch. "We have 20 minutes, it's almost 2:00pm."

"Besides, Mrs. Rogers, you'll see the both us again just in time for dinner tonight when the younger versions of us come back from our trip," Bucky added.

"Oh, yes," she realized. "But, I fear I don't have much longer to be with that version of you both, is all."

I felt like I could cry. "Mom, it's okay, c'mere," I hugged her. "It's all gonna be alright for us," I whispered. "I know you're afraid, but you don't have to be."

"I'm not afraid of death, my sunshine boy," she murmured back as she hugged me tighter. "I'm afraid of leaving you all alone. I fear for you, my son, in this cruel world."

"I have Bucky," I told her. "He stayed with me until we left for the army- we even met a few times during those years. Then, I saw him again in the future. He's always there for me as I'm there for him. You don't need to worry, mom, when you weren't there to love me, he was... and I never forgot that love you had for me, either."

"Really?" she looked up and into my eyes that matched hers almost perfectly.

"Of course," I said. "Love like that never dies, and I see it clear as day that it never did. I promise."

She pulled away from me, wiping a tear from her face. "I want to ask something, but I don't want a specific day. I can't know exactly- but, when do I... pass?"

"Soon," I told her. "I was there when it happened," I felt my eyes start to grow blurry with tears of my own. "In the coming months it'll happen, and before the election."

"Oh... well... who wins?" she asked.

I smiled. "Roosevelt," I chuckled.

"Oh, good," she smiled. "Perhaps you boys should get going now."

"Wait," Bucky interrupted. "Uh, I have to pee first," he went on. "Mrs. Rogers... would you show me where the bathroom is?"

"But, James, you spent your childhood here, surely you know where th-"

"Mrs. Rogers- please?"

She nodded. "Very well."

And, they walked away and into the hallway where I couldn't see them nor hear them.

When they both came back together, I assumed he hadn't actually gone to the bathroom, but I couldn't figure out what had went on, but it didn't matter. It was time to leave.

"Ready?" I asked, noticing an ear-to-ear smile across my mother's face.

"Absolutely," he answered.

"Oh, I nearly forgot- Happy birthday, my boy," she kissed my cheek.

"Thank you- I love you, mom," I leaned over and hugged her one last time.

"I love you too, Steven."

I clicked my button and so did Bucky and, with a flash at precisely 2:00pm, we were back at The Avengers Facility.

We both unequipped our suits and approached Tony to give him back the hand-pieces without a word.

"Cute outfits," Tony commented.

"We had to blend in somehow," Bucky added.

"Well, did you at least have fun?" he wondered.

"More than I could've ever asked for," I told him. "Seriously, thank you."

He smiled up at me. "It was my pleasure."

—————

My only remark on this whole journey is rather simple, in fact...

At least, this time, she got to finish telling me she loved me.

~ S. R.