The next few days were a little bit of a blur for Wooyoung. There was a lot of phone calls made to get him on donor lists once the tests came back with what his cell type was.

Jongho had volunteered immediately to be tested to see if he could be the donor but unfortunately he wasn't a match, and neither was San.

Even Pierre was tested.

And there were no available donors at the moment, so now the waiting game began.

Wooyoung was immediately set up to start chemotherapy in the mean time. Dr. Fields was worried about how quickly the leukemia had set in, so he wanted to start treating it as quickly as possible.

They went over all the risks that came from it, as well as the fact that he was going to still feel very fatigued and there was a chance he'd lose his hair. The doctor was going to try to prevent that as much as possible, but he couldn't make any promises.

The most immediate problem right now was the fact that Wooyoung's spleen was enlarged. Because of this, Dr. Fields wanted to start radiation therapy to try and keep things under control along side having Wooyoung take a chemotherapy drug to try and control his cell growth.

For some time, San tried to convince the doctor to let Wooyoung move back to his penthouse so he could be more comfortable during the day. It was Wooyoung who decided to stay here though. He wanted to be close to the doctors so they could help him when needed.

When everything was situated, Wooyoung was set up to go through his first round of radiation therapy.

"Alright, we will go over this just one more time. This will be an external radiation treatment. You are going to lay face down on this table for up to 30 minutes while we shoot the beams of radiation at your spleen and your back to try and reduce the cancerous cells in your body. We will repeat this Monday through Friday to try and stay ahead of things. You may experience nausea, vomiting, or diarrhea as a side effect." Dr. Fields looked at him, then glanced at the radiology team standing off to the side. "Are you sure you want to proceed?"

Wooyoung closed his eyes and nodded. He was at the point where he felt like he couldn't feel any worse than he did now.

Fatigue plagued him every minute of the day now. There were a few times that he almost wished it was just all end and he could finally rest.

But he wasn't one to give up and roll over.

The radiation was a painless process but he did feel incredibly nauseous once it was over.

San was there to help him back to bed as soon as it over. "Can I get you anything?" He asked, running his hands lovingly through Wooyoung's hair.

The younger shook his head and cringed when his stomach flipped.

"I've got a Sprite here for you to sip on. The carbonation may help settle your stomach, but only if you feel up to it, ok?"

"Thanks... Sannie..." Wooyoung looked up at him. "Are... you staying?" He reached over to take San's hand.

"For a little bit, baby. I do have a meeting I need to get to today, but Jongho is coming to take my place."

"He doesn't need to do that." Wooyoung closed his eyes again to hide the sadness that was sure to be filling them.

It felt like he was being selfish when he wanted San, or even Jongho, to be with him when they had their own lives they needed to take care of. San had his business and Jongho had the farm. Neither could run without them.

And yet he didn't want to be alone.

But he sighed and tried to let those feeling go. It wouldn't really matter much if they stayed or not anyway if he was going to end up sleeping a lot.

San must have sensed his feelings, though, because he slowly lowered himself on the bed behind Wooyoung and wrapped his arms around the younger's waist. "Try to get some rest, Youngie. You've had a hard day."

Wooyoung felt himself slowly relax more when San started to rub his arm and his side.

"Youngie?" San's voice dropped in volume and he leaned forward so he could whisper into Wooyoung's ear. When he got a hum for an answer he said, "Have you thought anymore about what I asked you? I just want you to know that it's what I still want. No matter what happens over the next few weeks. I want to be with you."

The words washed over Wooyoung, but he couldn't find it in his heart to answer, so he pretended he was asleep. He could feel San craning his neck to look at him and then place a kiss on his shoulder before laying his head down.

But Wooyoung couldn't sleep. He knew that San deserved an answer, and he felt bad for dragging it out. There was something he needed to do first, though, before he could truly give his heart to San.

A few hours later he got his chance.

Wooyoung woke up after a few hours to Nova curled up on his chest with her paw over her nose. He smiled and lifted a hand up to stroke her soft fur. She chirped in response and rolled over onto her back and stared at him.

"Hey pretty kitty." His voice was raspy, but he still felt like he was feeling a little better. Even though he still felt like he could sleep, he was a little more energized.

At the sound of his voice, Jongho poked his head into the room and smiled brightly. "You're up! How are you feeling?" He hurried forward and sat down next to Wooyoung.

"I'm ok. How are you?" Wooyoung kept rubbing Nova's stomach so that he had something to focus on.

This was it, this was the chance he had to finally to try an straighten things out. It was something that had been on his mind every since his father had interrupted the conversation he had been having with Jongho.

"I'm good. I'm glad to see you up and about."

"Is the farm ok without you there? I don't want anything bad to happen because you're not there." Wooyoung finally glanced at Jongho out of the corner of his eye and noticed the younger had the softest look.

"Everything will be fine Woo. The farm is a well oiled machine. They can survive without me." Jongho leaned forward and took Wooyoung's hand. "Thank you for caring though."

The older blushed a little and looked down at their hands. He couldn't help but admire Jongho's rugged, work-worn hands. They were calloused and tanned by the sun, but they were so gentle and careful.

And Wooyoung loved every inch of them.

"I'll always care. I miss going out there." Wooyoung turned their hands over and started tracing Jongho's hand. "Jongho? Before my father came the other day... we were talking about things, and, and, and..." Suddenly he didn't know what he wanted to say.

"I know, I've been thinking about it too." Jongho whispered. "And... God I feel like I'm betraying my brother." He sat back and ran his other hand through his hair.

Wooyoung nodded.

He felt the same way. San had been nothing but kind to him. And yet there was part of him that knew, deep down, that things would never work with him.

Maybe, if they had years of practice and Wooyoung could learn to be ok with alone most of the time. But that wasn't what he wanted.

"Woo..." Jongho leaned forward again and looked at him. "I don't know how to say this, so I'm just going to say it. I want to be with you. It's what I've wanted every since that fist day in the diner, or when I drove you home after those women wouldn't leave you alone and you laid down in the front see of my truck so your head could be in my lap."

Wooyoung blushed at the memory bit the inside of his lip. 

"I was just never brave enough to say anything." Jongho sighed. "And then when I realized I had lost you... I should have fought for you, Wooyoung. And I'm sorry that I didn't, but I'm going to do that now." His face became very serious, and yet there was still a softness to his eyes. "I love you, Wooyoung. And I want to be with you."

"Jongho..." Wooyoung felt his heart beating faster as the other spoke.

And Jongho didn't even give him a chance to keep going before he kept speaking. "I know things are... scary... right now. But I am here for you, through all of this."

"Jongho."

"And I want to be able to take care of you. I have people who can run the farm."

"Jongho."

"And they will feed the animals and make the deliveries." By now, Jongho was waving his other hand around as he spoke.

"Jongho, pl—"

"But please, Wooyoung, I love you so damn much. You're all I've been able to think about, even after San's benefit. And I know he's going to hate me and probably never speak to me again, but I just need to say it!"

Wooyoung smiled as the younger rambled on. He knew that he was making the right choice too, because whenever he pictured it, he wanted Jongho to be by his side for the days to come.

Even if they were going to be his last.

"I want to take care of you. I want to wake up to you every morning and gaze at the stars with you at night. Call me a hopeless romantic, but I am. I want to make you breakfast in bed and see you waiting for me on the front porch after I've spent a long day in the fields. And— Why are you looking at me like that?" Jongho had finally stopped long enough to take in the wide smile on Wooyoung's face.

"Because I love you too."

It felt like a weight was suddenly lifted off Wooyoung when the words lift his lips. They were something that had been holding him back for so long now.

Jongho froze, his mouth open slightly, and he blinked. "Y-You..."

Wooyoung nodded and squeezed Jongho's hand. "I love you. I'm sorry it took me so long to say something, honestly I was really confused for a long time. Because to be honest with you, I care for San too, and he makes me happy and has done so much for me. But it's not the same."

They stared at each other for a moment, then Jongho stepped forward and lifted Nova off Wooyoung's chest. She meowed in protest and glared at them from the bottom of the bed, but neither of them cared.

Slowly, Jongho sat on the bed and leaned over Wooyoung to brace his hand on the older's other side. Then he leaned forward a little so that all Wooyoung could focus on was him. "Is this real? Am I dreaming? Please, don't play with me right now, Woo. You've already broken my heart once."

Wooyoung lifted a hand up to cup Jongho's cheek. "I know. And I'm so sorry that I did. I never meant to hurt you. But if I make it through this, I promise I will spend however long it takes trying to put I back together."

As soon as he finished, Jongho closed the gap between them and pressed their lips together. The kiss started slow, but once they both accepted what was happening, it quickly became more passionate.

Wooyoung let out a soft moan and he realized just how much he had missed this. How much he had missed Jongho.

When the younger pulled back and caressed Wooyoung's cheek, he took a moment to just study Wooyoung. "Promise me one thing. No more of this 'if' stuff, ok? You're strong, and you're going to make it. This is just one small hurdle we need to get through."

While Wooyoung doubted what Jongho was saying, part of him latched onto the words and he nodded. "And you'll be here with me?"

"Through everything, I promise."

"Good, that's all I've wanted this entire time." Wooyoung whispered as Jongho helped moved him over so they could lay in the bed together. "I've just wanted you to stay."