Budding Affection

"May sundo ka pala?" tanong ng kaklase namin, si Walter. Katatapos lang ng pang-umagang klase at palabas na ako ng room. Didiretso na ako ng cafeteria at dahil doon na rin papunta ang ibang mga kaklase ko kaya sasama na ako.

Nagtaka ako kaya luminga ako para makita kung sino ang tinutukoy niya. Si Leandro ang nakita kong nakasandal sa concrete na balustre na hanggang baywang niya. Nakahawak ang isang kamay sa strap ng bag at ang isang kamay naman ay may hawak na notebook. He was reading something at his notes and all his attention was on it alone. Kaya nang nilapitan ko siya, hindi man lang umangat ang tingin sa akin. Sumenyas ako sa mga kaklase ko na mauna nalang sila doon.

"Sana lahat ganyan kaconcentrated magabasa," untag ko. Doon na siya nag-angat ng ulo at napakurap-kurap nang malaman na nasa tabi na niya ako.

"Nandito kana pala," sabi nito at binuksan ang bag para ilagay ang notebook. "Gutom kana? Kain na tayo."

"Kanina ka pa dito?" tanong ko. Hindi ko napansin kung kailan dumating si Leandro dahil focused kami sa klase. Medyo mahirap ang subject kaya't mahirap na ang may makaligtaan. Kahit naman ayoko nang mag-aral dito, gusto ko pa rin namang mamaintain ang grades ko.

I turned to look at the ground. Marami na ang mga estudyanteng nagsisilabasan dahil tanghali na. Ang iba'y kakain sa labas o uuwi sa kani-kanilang mga bahay.

"About an hour ago, " he simply said. "Hindi mo ko napansin dahil tutok na tutok ka kay Prof. Howard," may himig ng panunukso sa boses.

Napabaling ang tingin ko sa kanya. Nag-isang linya ang mga mata ko.

"Why would you wait that long? Sana nauna kanang kumain. Wala naman tayong usapan na sabay tayo, diba?" usal ko. Hindi ko pinansin ang huling sinambit niya.

Wala sa sariling pinagkrus ko ang mga braso habang hinihintay siyang magsalita.

He plastered a small smile on his lips. "I don't mind waiting for you, Dani."

I tilted my head as I tried to understand what he just said. Then silence took over between us until my stomach growled in hunger. It reached Leandro's ears and made him laugh for a second.

"How about we eat our lunch already? Para may energy ka na naman para sa buong hapon na klase," he suggested and gestured me to walk.

Humakbang ako at narating din namin agad ang cafeteria dahil nasa ibaba lang naman iyon. bagaman maraming estudyante ang nananghalian doon, nakahanap din agad kami ng pwesto. Nilapag ko ang pagkain sa mesa habang tinititigan si Leandro.

"Really, you really didn't have to wait. I feel bad about it. Baka nagutom ka na sa kakahintay. Tahimik lang talaga ang mga alaga mo sa tiyan," I even cracked a lame joke. Pero hindi na iyon mahalaga. I just felt guilty for making him wait.

Kinuha niya ang tray mula sa akin at nilagay iyon sa lagayan na malapit lamang sa mesa namin. "Hindi ka talaga sanay na pinaglalaanan ng oras, no?" sabi nito at umupo na.

"Huh?

He heaved a sigh and grabbed his fork and spoon. "I mean, it was just nothing, really. Huwag mo na masyadong isipin. And like I said, I don't really mind waiting. Waiting for you is not a waste of time," seryosong sabi niya. "Let's eat."

He's at it again! Inulit na naman ni Leandro ang sinabi niya...at may karugtong pa!

I'm really baffled by what he said. What could it mean?

I stared at him while he was munching his food. What could he be thinking? He's really saying something weird!

Umangat ang tingin niya sa akin at nagtataka ang mukha nang nagtanong, "Why are you not eating? Ayaw mo ba sa ulam?"

I shook my head, then began eating my food. Masarap ang Bicol Express na tinitinda sa cafeteria pero that moment, it tasted different. Bakit puro nalang anghang 'yon?

"Gusto ko ang ulam pero ayokong nasasayang ang oras mo," sambit ko. Shit! Ba't ang sobrang anghang?

"May issue ka talaga sa oras ko, no?" He chuckled a bit. Then he offered me a bottled water that he already uncapped.

Why didn't I buy one again? Sana sinabay ko na kanina nang bumili ako ng pagkain. Pero kinuha ko na ang tubig at ininom iyon hanggang sa mangalahati. Promise! Babayaran ko ang tubig na binigay niya.

"Kita mo? Dahil sa isang oras na paghihintay ko sa'yo, naubos kong i-review ang notes ko. Walang nasayang na oras, Dani. It was a time well-spent," pahayag nito at bumuntong hininga. "Kaya huwag mo na masyadong isipin ang bagay na iyon."

"Oh, I see," I said, nodding my head. I went back to eating. "You're reviewing for your quiz?"

"Yes! Nakita ko lang kanina na all eyes ka sa professor niyo buong klase. Halos ayaw bumitaw ng tingin mo sa kanya."

"What are you implying, huh? Wala akong crush kay Sir Howard!" mariin kong tanggi. Napaangat muli ang tingin ko sa kanya.

"Salamat naman kung ganoon. Wala akong pambato kung sakali." He breathed a sigh of relief.

"What do you mean? And were you watching me the whole time?"

Binaba nito ang hawak na kubyertos at tinukod ang magkabilang siko sa mesa at pinagsalikop ang mga kamay malapit sa baba. "Tungkol kay Sir Howard, normal naman ang mamangha sa kanya. He was my teacher, too, in one of my subjects way back in first year. May star quality talaga itong si Sir Howard dahil maliban sa makisig na ay magaling talagang magturo kaya lahat ng mga kakalse kong babae at binabae ay nagkakacrush sa kanya," he said while looking at me intently.

Tumunganga lang ako sa kanya. Hindi ko napansin na hindi ko na pala nagagalaw ang pagkain ko.

"At oo, inaamin ko, I was really watching you." Sumungaw muli ang mga ngiti nito. "Pero naalala ko may quiz pala kami, that really encouraged me to open my notes, and you know, start studying. I remember when I was a freshman, too, parang tulad mo din ako, tutok ang buong isip sa klase," he shared.

"Ngayon hindi na?" udyok ko pa.

"Hindi na. Medyo naokupa mo na." Bumaba ang tingin nito at binalikan ang pagkain na parang walang nangyari.

And I was there getting so confused with his words. How am I supposed to finish my food when he was blurting out nonsense?

Pero sa huli ay itinuon ko na lamang ang atensyon ko sa pagkain at inubos ang lamang ng plato ko. I offered to him what's left of the Bicol Express dahil sayang naman 'yon. Medyo madami pa iyon at hindi ko naman masyadong nagalaw. I honestly didn't want to force myself to eat it so I only ate the rice alongside the soup being offered for free. I would normally ignore it when I eat here, but for the first time I touched it because I didn't have a choice. Kaysa naman magutom ako, kinain ko nalang. It tasted just fine, and I actually enjoyed it. Emerald would be surprised to hear this.

Leandro took it and as soon as he tasted it, he quickly grabbed the bottled water he had handed to me and drank from it.

"Bakit ngayon ka pa namula gayong tapos kana kumain? Late reaction naman yata," he noticed while looking at my face. "At bakit di mo man lang ako sinabihan na sobrang anghang pala?" He was doing mouth breathing to allow the steam out. Inabot ulit niya ang tubig at uminom doon.

I stood up and walked hurriedly towards the fridge to get water. Dalawa ang kinuha ko at nagmamadaling binayaran iyon. Nang bumalik ako sa mesa ay namumula pa rin si Leandro. Kahit na na mukhang naghihhirap ay pilit pa rin niyang inubos ang pagkain. Hindi na niya ginalaw ang ulam na binigay ko. After he finished his eating, he gulped down all that's left from the bottle.

"I- I thought you have a high tolerance for spicy food," I said apologetically. Inabot ko sa kanya ang binili ko. He accepted it, smiling, but didn't open it.

Leandro nodded his head. "Thank you."

He looked a bit okay now. Hindi na siya namumula.

"Nakita kita noon halos kainin mo ng buo ang sili noong pumunta ako sa inyo. We were eating mangoes that time at sinawsaw sa toyo na may asin at sili."

"Kaya ko naman kumain ng maanghang pero hindi gaya nito. Ano bang klaseng sili nilagay nila dito?" He shook his head like he couldn't believe it. "Kaya pala hindi mo halos nagalaw." He looked at my face again and furrowed his forehead. "Ahm...namumula ka pa rin."

"Huh?" I uttered, completely unaware of what was going on with my face. My cheeks felt hot when I felt them with the back of my palm. "This is just a late reaction like you said. Maanghang nga talaga 'yong Bicol Express," I tried to reason out but I could only feel my lips quivering.

"Sigurado ka?" nag-aalalang tanong niya. I smiled to assure him that it was nothing of a concern.

I nodded sheepishly. I didn't know if it was just me but he looked really worried. His face looked as if it speaks volumes I can tell what's going on in his head. Pero, bakit ganoon? Why all of a sudden does this have to happen? Why am I so conscious about his presence when all this time we're always together? Dahil ba wala si Lily? Siguro ngayon lang naman ito. Sa susunod na mga araw, I probably wouldn't be in particular get so fidgety when he's around.

Hindi naman unang beses na magkasama kaming kumain sa lunch. Nang mag-umpisa ang second semester, normally, he'd be at the cafeteria by the time our class ends in the morning and we would eat together. Palaging ganoon ang scenario. Lily even shooed him away because he had to stick with his friends and not with us. He would reason out that his friends preferred to go out to eat and he didn't like to leave the campus anymore. Mainit raw at nakakapagod! But the real reason I guess was food being sold here is way cheaper than that of the outside. Pansin ko nga, mapera ang mga kaibigan niya.

But nevertheless, kanina ko pa nararamdaman ang presensya niya, and the feeling was really new to me. Hindi ko mapangalanan.

He stared at me again and let out a sigh before smiling. Hinanda ko na ang mga gamit ko at nilisan ang lugar. A few minutes later, we were walking side by side and taking the direction of the building where I'm going to have my first class in the afternoon. In most days, Lily and I just stay in the student center to chat and read our notes. Now, I didn't really have anything to do to kill the time. Maybe, I will just read my notes, too. Pero wala namang quiz! I couldn't bring myself to read anything, especially when there was no purpose. It's either for exam or purely entertainment. Haist. Sana mabili ko na ang librong nakita ko doon sa bookstore.

"Ahm...mapula pa rin ang pisngi mo, Dani," pansin niya. "Are you sure it's not anything serious?"

I sat down in the bench and put my bag in the side. I covered my face with my hands. Why is it still flushed? Am I still thinking about it?

I heaved a sigh and looked up at him standing in front of me a meter away. "I feel better now. Pumunta kana sa building niyo."

It was almost as if I was begging him to go, really. I can see some students staring at us...or at him, if I would be honest. Hindi naman bawal bumisita ang taga-Engineering Department dito. There are few from his department who always hang around here to catch up with friends. Pero sa mga ganitong sitwasyon katulad ng sa amin ni Leandro, the first impression would probably be we're dating.

Or it was just me again thinking way ahead and into unnecessary details? Gusto ko na talagang pukpukin ang ulo ko. At heto na naman ako nakatunganga sa kanya na parang tanga!

"Mga 30 minutes pa naman bago magsimula ang klase." Umupo ito sa upuan na nasa kabila at paharap sa akin. "Why don't you take a rest while I go over my notes? Promise. Tahimik lang ako."

"Huh?"

"Favorite expression mo talaga 'yan, no?" Malakas itong tumawa. I can feel many eyes staring at us. I didn't need to look around to see that for myself. "You don't look okay to me. Inumin mo nga ito."

Tubig?

Oo, Danielle Therese! Tubig nga inaabot niya sa'yo! Iyong binili mo para sa kanya.

At ang tanga lang, ngayon ko lang napansin na hindi ko pala nabitbit 'yong sa akin. Naiwan ko doon sa cafeteria. Ang shunga lang!

"It's yours. I don't need it," mariing iling ko. Para sa kanya iyon, bakit ko pa kukunin? Hindi naman ako inuuhaw.

He shrugged his shoulders. Sa huli ay binuksan niya at ininom ang laman hanggang sa mangalahati. He looked down to read his notes and from time to time put markings and solve. I don't really understand what it was about but as I gazed at him, he looked so engrossed on what he was doing. Tama nga siguro si Lily. His brother was really studious and loved engineering at heart.

He cleared his throat. "Kung mawawala lang naman ang pamumula ng pisngi mo habang tinititigan mo ako ay ayos lang naman," he said without looking at me.

Flabbergasted by that remark, napaubo ako. I wanted to hit my chest and my head for getting so surprised in a silly way. Ngunit lalong lumala ang pag-ubo ko.

"Okay ka lang?" Lumapit siya sa akin at medyo nag-alinlangan pa. Mayamaya nararamdaman ko na ang marahang paghagod niya sa likod ko. "Reddening of the face and now this. Nahawaan kana siguro ni Lily."

Of course, his claim was without basis. Okay ako at wala akong sakit.

Inilapit niya sa akin ang tubig na pinag-inuman niya kanina.

"Gusto ko nang isiping in love kana."

Patuloy ako sa pag-ubo. I had no choice but to take that water and gulp it down my throat.

Shit! Two indirect kisses today.

I wanted to just disappear for a moment. Lily, please come back.

A/N

This is me just being honest again. Medyo hirap akong ipausad itong plot. Sa dami ng mga kwento sa paligid lalo na sa social media, medyo tinakasan ako ng sweetness sa katawan. Sana bumalik kahit langgamin pa ako kasi kailangan sa pagsulat ng mga nakakakilig na eksena. Hahaha. I'm just really thankful I finished a chapter in two nights. Oo. Sa gabi ko nalang talaga ito ginagawa. Hahaha. Ang hirap sa araw, ang daming distraction. I'm also currently taking a program and I have classes during the weekend. Ang saya lang mag-aral! Haha. I get to do note-taking again! Hahaha. For a long time, I would just work on my computer to get things done and I haven't got the chance to write down things on paper (except of course for paperwork that my job usually demands). Pero iba talaga yung mag-take note during lectures! Share ko lang dahil masaya lang ako. Sana nararamdaman niyo iyon. Delete ko rin itong part na ito kapag okay na. Sa akin lang to, kinakausap ko sarili ko. Wag kayong ano. Hahaha.