Teddy

I WALK UP TO MY APARTMENT to find a man sitting on the ground, his back resting against my door.

"Jensen?" I ask. "What are you doing here?"

When he rises to his feet, he loses his balance and falls back against the door. I reach out to steady him. He's drunk. He rarely drinks enough to get drunk, especially around me. He knows how much I've resented taking care of my drunk father all these years.

"Did you walk here? All by yourself? In the dark?" His words are a bit slurred. "Teddy. That isn't safe. You can't be doing that. Where were you anyway? I've been waiting for a while."

I push him aside to unlock the door and then usher him inside. "How'd you get here? You didn't drive, did you?"

"I ran. My truck is at home."

"You ran?"

"Yep," he says, popping the p. "I ran all the way to my dad's, but then I saw that fucking yellow door and I heard their laughter, and I just couldn't do it. Then I met Hal, and we drank some beers and had some pizza. Hey, how come we never go to Townies? If you can get past the smell, it's a pretty decent place."

He kicks off his shoes and falls onto the couch, holding his arms out to me. "Come here, baby. Come snuggle me. I miss you."

Ignoring him, I retreat to the kitchen to fetch him a glass of water. He said he had pizza, but maybe he needs food too. As I search through a cupboard, he comes up behind me and wraps his arms around my middle, pulling me close to him.

"Jensen." His name is a whoosh of air as I try to center my thoughts. His body pressed to mine feels too good, too familiar, and I've been missing his touch too much to resist it tonight. But I don't want it like this. Not when he shows up drunk on my doorstep. Not before he sorts through his demons, which is glaringly obvious that he hasn't.

I wrestle myself out of his arms, putting distance between us. "Don't, Jensen. Don't do that. Not tonight. Not like this."

He runs a hand through his unruly hair. "Shit." He backs away from me, settling his unsteady body against the counter. "Shit, Teddy. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have come. Should I leave? Yes, yes, I'll leave. That's a good idea."

When he starts to leave, I intercept him in the doorway. "No! No, J. You can't leave like this. You're too drunk. Just stay. I'll get you some water and Tylenol and you can sleep it off in my bed."

He hangs his head. "I'm sorry, baby. I keep fucking up, don't I?"

"You didn't fuck up, Jensen. You're human. You have emotions. You're allowed to try to escape them sometimes. Maybe do it at home next time, though. Or bring Kelly or one of your brothers with you. You know, a babysitter."

He chuckles, the corners of his eyes crinkling. "Noted."

I grab his hand and lead him through my apartment and deposit him in my bedroom, leaving to fetch Tylenol from the bathroom. When I come back to the room, he's shirtless and splayed across my bed.

"Here." His hand shoots up, holding his shirt. "For you."

The gesture makes me smile and I take it from him, handing him the medicine in exchange. "Aren't you sweet?"

"I found this one under your pillow." He shows me the one I stole from his hamper the other day, and my cheeks heat.

He props his head up on his hand and watches as I trade my shirt for his. I unhook my bra under the shirt, pull one strap off my arm through the sleeve and snake the bra out of the opposite sleeve hole, tossing it onto the floor.

"That's some Houdini shit right there. But, mostly, it was cruel. I miss your tits. You could have just let me see them."

Biting my lip, I play with the hem of the shirt, and then I sneak it up past my chest, revealing my breasts. His eyes widen and he sits up on the bed. "Shit," he whispers. He glances up at me. "I don't suppose you'll let me touch them?"

I lower the shirt, shaking my head. "Not tonight, J. We're going to just sleep tonight."

He nods in acknowledgement, then slides under the blankets, holding the edge up for me. When I slide in, he tucks the blankets under my chin, and looks down at me.

"You're so beautiful, Teddy. I don't know if I told you enough. But you've always been the most beautiful woman to me." He brushes the hair off my face, his fingers lingering, dusting over my cheeks in slow, lazy movements.

"Can I kiss you? I promise I won't take it further. But I really want to kiss you. It's been way too long since I've kissed you."

When I don't answer, he whispers, "Please."

I nod, and a slow smile lifts his lips up. "Yeah?"

I nod again. "Yeah. I'd really like that."

He traces his thumb across my bottom lip, and I watch his Adams apple bob as he swallows. He's nervous.

"Hey," I whisper, running my hand through the hair at the nape of his neck. "It's just me. You've kissed me millions of times by now."

"Yeah, but I never realized it could be the last time I ever kissed you. Besides, it's not just you. There's nothing just about you, Teddy. You're everything. To me, you're everything."

I yank him down to me, my mouth pressing hard against his for a quick kiss. "It's not the last one, you big fat dummy. We're going to have a million more."

When he smiles, my heart skips a beat before pit-pattering fast in my chest. "Now kiss me already," I say, bringing his mouth back down to mine.

He crushes his lips against mine, and I think he's going to kiss me hard and rough, but instead he's gentle as if he's savoring every touch of my lips and feel of my tongue against his. I rake my fingers through his hair and tug, inviting him to lose himself in me.

He pulls slightly away, groaning against my mouth. "Baby, I promised I wouldn't take it further than a kiss, but you're trying to tempt me like the witch you are. Stop it or I'll quit kissing you."

I laugh, but he silences it with his mouth, his tongue rough against mine. He nips at my bottom lip, pulling it taut between his teeth before releasing it and soothing the burn with his tongue. I moan without thought, my hips bucking without my permission.

He lowers his body onto mine, pinning me into the mattress. "Strike two, baby," he says when he comes up for air. "I'm not going to fuck you no matter how hard you try to seduce me."

I push my hands against his chest in protest. "I'm not doing it on purpose, Jensen! I'm just reacting. It's been a while, ok? It's not my fault."

"It's been too fucking long," he grunts, moving his body just enough to show me how he's reacting to the kisses. I squeeze my eyes shut to block out the feel of his hard cock against me.

"Now who's tempting who?"

"That was just a taste of your own medicine. Now shut up and let me kiss you until you get your third strike."

I roll my eyes at his smirk, and he laughs. "Fuck, I've missed you," he says right before taking my mouth for another punishing kiss. The minute his wandering hand grazes the side of my boob, I thrust my hips, moaning at the feel of him against me. When he tries to pull away, announce the third strike, put an end to this make out session, I wrap my legs around him, trapping him.

"No, no, no. I'm sorry. But I call foul. That was your fault. You cheated. You touched my boob. Why did you do that? It's like you wanted me to lose. You know if I lose, you lose, right? Don't you want to keep kissing me?"

His head falls into the crook of my neck, and I feel his hot breath against my skin as he laughs. "Teddy, you are my favorite person," he admits between huffs of laughter. He pulls away from my neck, a wide smile on his face. "You know that, right? You always have been, always will be, my favorite person."

"Ditto," I whisper, smiling up at him. "Now are we calling a redo on the third strike since you cheated?"

"No, baby." He shakes his head, smoothing the hair off my face. "This is where we stop tonight."

Rolling off me, he situates himself on the bed next to me, then pulls me into his side. I nestle into him, my head resting over his racing heart. I draw circles across his chest, too wired to settle into sleep.

He kisses the top of my head. "Goodnight, Teddy. I love you."

"Night, Jensen. I love you, too."

Minutes later, I blink away the drowsiness that suddenly hits me. I want to savor this, the way it feels to be in his arms again, because I know tomorrow we go back to reality and I'm not ready for that.

And, sure enough, the minute I wake up, I know. Sweeping a hand across the empty space where my boyfriend's warm body once was, my suspicions are confirmed. He's gone.

I roll over, avoiding his empty spot, and just as I get comfortable again, my phone alarm goes off. The world goes on, even when you want to pull the covers over your head and pretend it doesn't, if only for the rest of the day at least.

I grab my phone to turn off the alarm when I notice two texts waiting for me. My heart races at the sight of Jensen's name. He texted me twenty minutes ago.

JENSEN: I'm sorry I left like that, but I thought it might be easier. I don't want to pretend that last night fixed everything. I know I have shit to do first. I need to get my head on straight. Please be patient with me, baby.

JENSEN: Thanks for last night. That meant everything to me. I love you. So fucking much, baby.

Grinning, my thumbs work quickly across the keyboard as I reply.

ME: Pretty sure I'm still owed a third strike. You did cheat after all.

JENSEN: The ump's calls are final.

ME: The ump sucks.

JENSEN: That's what she said.

Chuckling, I drop the phone to my chest, thinking back over last night. I reread his texts, worrying my bottom lip between my teeth.

ME: I'll be patient, J. You're worth the wait.