Light emanating from the round bulb slowly burned my eyes as I stared at it with my back on the bed. My ears could pick up noises from the hostel as the residents prepared for classes. I couldn't tell if I missed the rush of rising early in other to meet up with lectures. I remembered I was very bad at being prompt and was most times among students told to stay out. That was before popularity became my first love and my face had to be limited—according to the record label I was with then.

Still, school had not been so bad, mostly because my brother had been there to assist, nothing had been bad because he was there to assist. Now he wasn't.

I rolled to my side, my view on the wall underneath my window. There were small patches of a dark brown hue on the sky blue coat. Almost like it was a deliberate art to make the color pop, only it did not pop but looked like a soul with blemish. I swallowed my spit—a soul with blemish. I scratched my itching nose and closed my eyes. It was almost as if I could replay the moments again.

Whats the fastest way to hell?

"If hell really is Tatarus, then I better find a moving entrance..." my eyes opened as I tried to envision my next set of words, "...in plain sight, like the Vice Chancellors office." That would not be plain since the man acted like the devil—or Hades in this case—himself.

"Or maybe I would have to travel to America...since that's where everything known to man happens in movies." My side felt hot and I laid on my back again, eyes greeted its old view. But even if I did find an entrance, that would be unfair.

I sighed and let my mind linger around the thoughts until they eventually faded like the noiselessness in my apartment was a drowning music. It was something I did when I caught myself venturing into places I was not in the mood for. There was a high probability that I would have stayed longer than a few minutes in that state if the bark of a dog had not startled me.

Allowing myself some time to blink the after effects of staring at a light bulb away, I moved my head to the direction. It was my mobile phone enclosed in its gray case. I sighed and stretched my hand to where it laid vibrating.

"Hello," I said tonelessly into the phone, knowing who would respond to me. The ringtone had been assigned to his contacts after a series of arguments we had a few months ago. I thought he barked a lot when he was angry and it suited him perfectly. I had messed up a lot of contacts—new names and specific ringtones.

"Where were you?" Jides baritone voice rang out, each word said one at a time.

"Here?"

"You could have fucked this up," he went on and a groan brewed up deep in my throat. He was going to start my morning like this? No how are you? Are you hungry? "How do we give this people want they want if you won't show up to where you are supposed to be?"

"I'm not sure I fol—"

"See the way you made me keep begging this man and worse of all, your phone was off. What is wrong with you Ite?"

I knew I did something wrong and knew it was yesterday because, like he said, I had turned off my phone because it was a Sunday and I wanted to be alone, but I couldn't tell what exactly I had done. I needed some explanation. "I'm sorry for what I did...what did I do?"

The male on the other side laughed, not one of happiness or comedy. "You are asking what you did?"

"Yes...yes," I sniffed and rubbed my nose with the back of my free hand, eyes touched everywhere other than the florescent light bulb.

"You are asking what you did?" he repeated again. I kept quiet this time, if he was wanted to repeat his statements over and over again, I would let him.

Sure enough he did, "Ite, you are asking what you did? Did you check your planner by any chance?" He was the only other person who knew about my inability to stay focus.

"Yes," I said but got off the bed at the mention of my planner. I hadn't really checked around there after the show on Saturday. The thought of the show brought the memory of the girl. A light smile played at the tip of my mouth.

"And yet you did not show?"

I got to the wall, traced each planner till I got to Sunday. I was yet to put up a a new week schedule. The words in my writing greeted me and I let out the groan that had been at the back of my throat. Now I knew why he was pissed off. With my hand, I rubbed my face thinking of excuses to make before rendering an apology.

"I'm sorry man, I got carried away," Jide breathed loud enough for me to hear. I imagined him with three actions—Clenched fists, gritted teeth, closed eyes.

"What were you doing?"

"Lots of things..." mainly pushing things into my system and laying aimlessly around the house, but he did not need to know that, "...but important stuffs."

The silence that came next made me think he had hung up the call, I took the phone off my ear to see it was not so. "Hello?"

"What do I do with you Ite?" I tightened my lips and retraced the planner of yesterday, knowing it was merely a rhetorical question. "Do you know what this cost me?" He spoke lightly now, like he talked to a child. There was a possibility that he thought of me as that deep down since he was two years older than me.

The words on the planner mocked me; 'Meeting with DJ Magnesium'. "Jide, I am sorry...really."

"Guy, can sorry do anything again?" DJ Magnesium, who was mostly called DJ Maggi was one of, if not, the biggest producers in the country who worked with a record label that Jide believed was the key to being national and climbing the international ladder. The two year contract I had with my previous record label had been terminated—by me—six months into the completion. This was because I could not concentrate on anything at that time. They had let me go, maybe from understanding or maybe pity. Still I was glad. If it were left to me, I would have preferred for all of it to blow over—me, my career and life. But Jide had pursued, sending out letters to different labels until he got a call from DJ Maggi.

"Man, I really forgot. You no sey I no go wan spoil wetin you dey arrange," My eyes trailed to the mirror as I assured him I was all for his plans. From the spaces not covered by the post it notes, I caught sight of my reflection and I touched my face, the words of the mermaid played in my head. When were these beards going to appear? I wondered if I would look like Falz, the Nigerian artiste or maybe Justice Smith, the American actor. I caressed my chin and opened my mouth in a smile.

My teeth looked straight from the frontal view, I turned to my side, looked at it from the new angle and noted it was bent...somehow. Maybe I should get braces that would also appear like it was mine, only whiter.

"...Kiishi..." the yell of my name jolted my attention back to the phone. Jide had been saying something for the past minute and I had zoned out.

"Sorry, sorry. I dropped the phone to use the toilet," I lied but knew that would not make any difference. The phone had loud speaker, didn't it?

"Guy, do you need some...time? We could call all these off and maybe you need to go back to see that woman. I could call your parents now and tell them--"

"Don't. I am okay. I just forgot yesterday." Finally, I turned away from the mirror, "You should give me Maggis number, I'll speak with him, I know how much this means to you. And I promise this won't happen again." My body felt weak at the mention of my parents. I was not ready to hear what they would have to say about me not returning their calls.

"No, I told you I begged him na, he agreed for later this week already. You are lucky he likes your vibe." A smile graced my face at the thought of how Jide would have acted.

"Did you roll on the floor?"

"Ehn?" His voice tone told me he was confused with my question and so I clarified, asking how he begged the man exactly. "You are mad, how will someone like me roll on the floor?" He laughed and I joined in too.

After, he made sure to say; "But really Kiishi, if this is all too much, let me know okay?"

"Guy, I dey alright." I sighed wishing he would not think anything I did was because I wasn't okay. That was how most people had began to treat me and most people consisted of my parents.

He chuckled before his voice went serious, "Ite, don't pull that stunt you did on Saturday again, for real." His words caused me to howl with laughter. Apparently, he had not gotten over telling the mermaids dark sinned friend he was single. Even if I had apologized throughout the night after I met up with him, he still thought to warn me.

"I told you I promise, didn't I?" I managed to say between laughs.

"Yes but if I don't keep reminding you, you won't remember."

I calmed down and eyed my kitchen door. I needed to get breakfast. "Fine, fine."

"And also, post something on your Instagram before people think you decided to go off the earth. Girls be in my DM asking why you haven't made a post in weeks even after all the shows."

"Girls be wilding," a smirk danced on my face. He ended the call and I walked to my window, the sun had decided to grace the earth with its warmth and my room with a few rays. I stood in the light and held the phone up, front camera open and a shirtless me appeared on screen. I tapped the shot button.

I opened the app and chose the picture while I tried to create a corny caption for my followers, but then a different idea struck me. A memory of how the mermaid had marveled—or screamed—at the ditch I had taken her to swept through my mind. I wanted to see her face again, and see the sad eyes surrounded by real laughter. Saving the picture as a draft, I searched for the mermaid using her real name but could not find her exactly because there were thousands of people with the name.

Why are they so many? I assumed she was the only one with that name in the world, simply because I had not heard of it before. I shook my head and returned to my picture.

"Once again I will let magic do the trick." I wiped off the caption and typed five words: count the stars again, mermaid?