The upper halls of White's palace were deserted, fewer Quartz guards than normal were stationed around the entryways, a number that had been dwindling over the millennia as the eldest diamond ventured less and less from her headship, and more gems were phased out of her use. The influx of gems when Orange Diamond had joined them had been almost welcome by the servants, if overwhelming, but they too had began to shrink in size once more. What need was there for them when that Diamond would be leaving?

Already the walls and rooms around her were fill with more statues than soldiers and an over abundance of silence. Not even Orange Diamond's wing where the more rowdy guards were assigned made more than a few hushed whispers, ethereal voices carried down by the clear crystals blanketing the ceiling.

It was easier to hear as Pearl moved down the hall towards them, the sole Carnelians in the palace now that the others had been phased out and yet they were the only ones making noise at this moment, and the small gem had to wonder if they were damaged in some way. Did they see themselves as irreplaceable now that they were the only ones? Was it because of a Diamond's favor of them? Just what, she liked to know, drove them to be so obtuse in comparison to the rest of their court.

Perhaps she had simply spent to long in White Diamond's light to understand why gems like them did what they did, or why a gem of Orange Diamond's grade liked them so much. Whatever the case may be, she refrained from questioning what they were thinking being out of stance as she picked up the conversation they were having, contextless snippets becoming full sentences as they failed to take notice of her approach.

"I can't believe-"

"-orse not! She'd-"

"-have to do something!"

"We can't just go barging in there!" The taller one yelled, louder than she wished if her long pause as both gems stopped to look at the doors and then back to one another, "What are we going to say? 'Oh, hey, my Diamond! Don't mind us, we just heard you yelling, talking to yourself, everything aye-okay?'" she immediately continued, hands moving in fast gestures as she acted out the small scene, ending with a stomp of her foot and a loudly issued, "No!"

The other raised both of her arms, palms upwards as she shrugged, "Sounds good to me. What wrong with that?"

"You saw her face when those Hematite came!" The tall Carnelian pushed her counterpart in the shoulder, knocking her a step back from the door's locking pad, "Do you really thinks she wants one of us in there right now?"

The small one responded by pushing the other back, Pearl being reminded once more just how Ill fitted these two were for their job, "Someone has to check-"

Both guards were startled, heads turning as the very distinct voice of Orange Diamond filtered from behind the closed doors, her voice carrying even to Pearl as she nearer to hear her screaming, "COME ON!"

"What is going on here?" Pearl questioned, a single eyebrow raising as the two guards jerked back and spun around. She could see the brief fear on their face before it disappeared as the two jumping in place, despite not being were they should, to salute her.

"Nothing, ma'am!" The short one, her designation forgotten to Pearl, answered.

"Is there someone in Orange Diamond's quarters?" She pushed, alarmed by the screaming she had heard, especially through the thick doors.

The two Carnelians exchanged a look, the tall one answering her this time, "No ma'am! Just Orange Diamond. She's been..." the corners of her mouth pulled back, teeth visible as uncertainty caused her lip to quiver, "She's been talking to herself ma'am. No one has been in or out recently."

Reassured that it was merely Orange, Pearl settles back into her normal role, keeping the tray she had been balancing on one hand steady as she looked between the two.

After a long moment of neither moving, the smaller gem furrowed her brow in mild annoyance, "One of you has to open the door for me."

In an instant both were animated, salute dropping and eyes going wide, the two knocking into each other as they bolted for the door's lock at the same time, Pearl's eyes remaining on them as they fell to the floor and by her own good reflexes did she manage to step back, avoiding a long tail of hair that nearly knocked the thin tray out of her hand.

Both red gems groaned, one sprawled out on the floor while the other sat up with the use of her hand as support while clutching her head with the other, legs tangled together and nearly causing her to fall again when she move to get up.

Closing her eyes, Pearl took a deep breath as she shook her head with disapproval. Opening them again to watch as the carnelians separated, much more careful while they took their places either side of the door, the short one turning to release the doors for her. Pearl held back a remark, feeling the embarrassment on their faces was more than even for what had just occurred and stepped between them to enter unannounced, as she had become accustomed to doing.

Pearl stopped abruptly, thin eyebrows screwing together as she took in the state of the young Diamond's room.

Entire bed askew, dozens of pillows littered the floor in haphazard piles. The normally organized desk bore a crack in its polished surface as a tray lifted half off the table by a pillow weighing its other end, dozens of white tablet were scattered on the desk and floor from when they had been launched from the tray. A stray square pillow lay precariously in the crook of the chair's arm, limp and nearly falling to join the mess on the floor. Pearl's eyes darted to the shelves that held the ancient relics that the young gem called nicknacks, the rows empty, though thankfully there were no fragmented remains that she had expected to see covering the place. Beyond the desk, Pearl did not see any real damage to the room, simply a ridiculous amount of pillows and tablets that were now contaminated and would need to be destroyed.

"I can't believe her!"

The gruff voice pulled Pearl's attention back to the bed, surprised when she saw the peach colored blanket rising from the opposite side of the moved bed until it slide back down, a mountain of messy hair and the drawn face of Orange Diamond came into view before she hunched over, throwing her upper half against the bed with a loud groan.

Before Pearl could question her, the young Diamond let out a roar, hands fisting the blanket and pulling it from the bed only to toss it at the window as she continue to yell, "Out of all my things! That chipped whetstone!"

"Has she been doing this long?" Pearl questioned, aware both carnelians were attempting to remain unseen as they cocked their heads to the side to catch a glimpse of their Diamond losing it.

"Not long." The smaller one said, though the hesitancy in her voice left Pearl doubtful of the truth of it.

"Maybe started an hour ago?" The other supplied, "Otherwise she's been quiet since you left yesterday."

"I see."

Pearl stepped into the room, the doors shutting on the Carnelians and leaving the two gems alone in the Diamond's room. She was none too surprised when Orange took no notice of her, only continuing to rage as she picked up another pillow and threw it too, grey eyes following it as it hit the window, the shaking of the pane betrayed the soft thud the hit made before it ricocheted off to bounce and slide across the marble floor in the direction of the desk.

"It's been a while since you've thrown a real temper tantrum." Pearl commented a moment later, turning back to the Diamond on the other side of the room. Her question caused the younger gem to whip her head around, eyes narrowed and teeth bared aggressively, ready to snap a biting retort at her intruder.

No more than a broken off sound escaped her mouth before Orange's snarl immediately vanished the moment she realized who was speaking, her eyes rounding as her eyebrows launched up her forehead, her mouth dropping open as she gasped, "Pearl!"

Moving to stand up, the older gem watched as Orange either lost her footing or slipped on a stray pillow, arms flailing briefly as she fell forward to get a mouth full of her mattress, face completely sunk into the pile of extra blankets and wild hair around her. The sight gave Pearl a soft chuckle, becoming louder as the diamond pushed herself off the bed with her elbows while she sputtered loudly to get hair from her mouth.

Orange looked up from her bed, cheeks burning in embarrassment as she used a hand to forcefully push back her hair and away from her mouth, peering at Pearl as she laughed behind her hand, eyes meeting hers the moment she sat up. The young diamond wasn't sure if she was glad to have gotten that sound from her or mortified that she was the cause of it.

"I-" Orange paused as she stood up, taking a moment to kick another pillow away from her feet and adjust her tunic into something more presentable as she faced the other gem, "I wasn't throwing a tantrum."

Pearl made a dramatic sweep of the room with her eyes, her eyebrows raised as she question, "Then your room normally looks like this when I'm not here?"

Orange's eyes glanced over the room, cheeks darkening further at the sight of the cluster of pillows flung about, her half eaten tablets a lost cause on the floor, and one of her blankets a heap against the window. The only thing that had remained untouched where the curtains that were always pulled back, now disturbed by the blanket that had gotten caught in the sheer material. "It's not-" her voice cut off as the excuse died before it even had a chance to leave her mouth, her eyes turning down to the rumpled sheets "...I was looking for something."

"What?"

"My pad." The diamond responded, "My personal pad."

Pearl blinked, surprised. She had never seen Orange treat anything more carefully than that pad, rarely allowing even her to touch it. "You've lost it?"

"White took it." Orange ground out through bared teeth, hands reaching out to grasp yet another pillow and throw it, "It was here, and now it's not." Pearl watched silently as the larger gem's shoulders rose as she spoke and Pearl waited for her to throw another one in anger, but after a moment her shoulders fell back, posture loosening as her tone softened, "I hid it before they came to take my things."

Orange looked back up at her, eyebrows turned upwards, "Stars Pearl, that was so embarrassing."

"Having your things taken?" She questioned lightly, the look of the defeated gem she had left here the day before returning as she moved from the side of the bed to join her.

"Being forced to stand here as they did." Orange answered, eyes turning to the jarringly empty shelves that once held the gifts she had been given throughout her short life, what she consider tokens of love gone from their protective housing, "The Hematite came not long after my first meal came this morning. They were kind enough to let me handle the relics though. I got to put them all away in a storage box before they took them."

Pearl couldn't exactly say if the gesture had been nice, or more cruel based on the dejection on her face.

"They must have found my pad when I wasn't looking."

"Why were you hiding it?" The older gem questioned, head tilting in mild confusion, "I thought you were going to go along with this?"

"I was!" Orange yelled, hands throwing up in the air so suddenly that Pearl took a step back, mindful of the tray in her hand.

"I am."Orange added in a much softer voice, "But that pad, it has everything on it. My drawings, my work, things I had been looking into, it had everything of mine. I just wanted..." her voice trailed off as she bit her lip, eyes shining even as her eyebrows arched down, anger turning her voice a little bit deeper "I can't believe she took it."

"It's alright." Pearl said quietly, soothingly, "It's just a pad."

"It wasn't just a pad!" Orange screamed, forcefully hitting herself in the chest as she as she continued to speak in a raised tone, "Those things were important to me! I had-" she stopped abruptly, a breath being sucked in between her bared teeth, "there were pictures of her."

Pearl continued to stand in the safety of the raised platform near the door, eyes following the larger gem as she began to pace back and forth, a range of emotion flashing across her face, though Pearl could mainly identify anger as it turned her cheeks a deeper shade of orange, nearly red, her hands clenching and unclenching at her sides as she grew more frantic in her pacing, feet knocking into pillows and sending them rolling across the floor.

"Drawings, notes, pictures, history!" Again, she was hitting herself in the chest, and Pearl briefly wondered if she realized how forceful she was being, or if she even felt it at all. "My history!"

"Calm down." Pearl eventually intervened, cautiously stepping down from the safety of her platform to approach the younger gem, "You'll get it back. It's only until Yellow Diamond comes to Homeworld."

Thankfully, with her now in her space, Orange seemed to calm her pacing, hands losing their tension as they rested against her thighs. Pearl relaxed, though wisely kept at an angle to keep the tray in hand tilted away from the larger gem's reach.

"She didn't say that." The young diamond said quietly, her eyebrows pulling together and creating lines on her forehead as her hands clenched once more.

"Orange?"

"She didn't say she would give it back when Yellow came. I remember, she didn't say she would give it back when Yellow came, only that I could leave then." Orange eyes met hers, pleading for her to understand, "Pearl, that pad means everything to me."

Pearl reached forward to touched her forearm in a gesture of comfort, keeping her voice soft as she spoke, "It's okay, Orange...."

"Stop saying it's okay, it's not." Orange shrugged off her hand, Pearl pulling back as she did, "This isn't alright!"

"White Diamond isn't interested in keeping your things." The older gem reasoned, "Think about this rationally. Breath."

Orange groaned in response, moving away from her as if to begin pacing again only to stop abruptly half way, her head falling down as she folded her arms across her chest, tucking her chin in as she remained there, eyebrows furrowing as her eyes closed. Pearl waited quietly as simply watched, feeling helpless as she watched the diamond pull into herself, fighting with herself until she finally turned back to her on her own, eyes lined with unshed tears.

"Am I being stupid?" She questioned, voice thick with emotion.

"You're dealing with how you feel." Pearl answered, shaking her head in response. Taking a moment, she set the tray onto the desk, uncaring of the stray tablet it sat on before turning to walk back to the taller gem, holding out her hands and waiting until Orange uncrossed her arms and placed her hands around hers. Pulling her close, Pearl tilted her head back to look up at her, offering her a small smile, "You're not stupid for being upset." Orange gave a small nod of acknowledgement, though she could not manage to uncurl her deep frown to return her smile. After a moment, Pearl continued, "But destroying your room isn't going to help you, it's only going to make White think you're misbehaving. It may be your room, but it is her palace."

"I just want my pad."

Pearl squeezed her hands, nodding in understanding, "We'll figure it out."

"I'm sorry." Orange breathed out, eyes scanning the room over the top of head, really seeing the mess she had created, "I shouldn't have done this."

"No." Pearl agreed, "But you could have done a lot worse, I suppose. The Pumice won't be happy about the cleaning they have to do now."

"It's their job." The diamond retorted, eyebrows pulled together as she gave the smaller gem a confused look. Pearl didn't voice it, but she was glad as she watched the color slowly retreating from her face, the only real evidence being the red rings still under her eyes from tears that hadn't quite gone away.

"It is." Pearl acknowledged, reluctantly releasing Orange's hands as she took a small step back, surprised as the back of her foot hit a pillow, causing her to look down at it and a nearby pile of them, cautious to not slip on them as Orange had before. "I don't think I ever realized how many pillows you keep."

"It's comfortable." The diamond explained, "It reminds me of....It reminds me of growing up with my mom. There were always more pillows than real furniture in the rooms, and we would just sink into them as she told me stories."

"Their sentimental." Pearl realized.

"It made staying here easier for me." Orange nodded, her lips finally turning up into the barest of smiles as she added, "At least, until I got to know you."

Pearl responded in kind, flattered that she was such a contribution to the Diamond's ease of staying with the eldest diamond. Motioning to the ones on the floor near her, she questioned, "Would you like to pick them up?"

Orange turned to regard them for a moment and chuckled, hand moving to the back of her neck as her eyes turned back to meet hers, "Not really."

Pearl tsked but did not push it further, instead turning to walk back to the desk to pick the tray back up, eyes turning to the fist sized dent mostly hidden under a pile of tablets, though the thick crack that cut through the white marble was hard to miss, "Then maybe you'd like to tell me why there is a crack in your desk?"

"I got angry."

Pearl turned slightly, cocking her head as she rose an eyebrow in question, "So you punched it?"

"It was the desk, or the glass," Orange responded, "I picked the sturdier of the two."

Pearl shook her head, though there was no honest disappointment in her action, "Your determined to get yourself into trouble, aren't you?" Moving back to her, she held out her hand, gesturing with her fingers for the larger gem to place her own hand onto her open palm, "Let me see your hand, did you hurt yourself?"

The diamond shook her head, not bothering to humor her by keeping her hands at her sided "I'm fine, Pearl. No damage."

Deciding it wasn't worth an argument over, Pearl nodded in acceptance, motioning with her free hand to the pillows around them, "At least gather some pillows so we can sit near the windows. I have your tablets, and you need to eat them."

Orange immediately got to work collecting pillows, grabbing as many as she could carry and bringing them over to where Pearl had moved to wait, dropping them on the floor and arranging them together before moving to gather more. Bent over picking up another and trying to figure out where it could fit into the pile she already had collected, she asked over her shoulder, "Does White know you came here?"

"Of course she does." Pearl answered, "But, as I believe you would say, she doesn't need to know I'm staying."

Orange stopped what she was doing to turn and look at her friend, a large smile stretching across her face before she burst out laughing, "You're the best, Pearl."

Walking over with what she had, the Diamond made a circle of pillows, sitting down first and then holding out her hand, aiding Pearl to sit down beside her before she was handing over the tray to her. Her attention was pulled by the blanket near them, the deep peach color a startling contrast against the pure white lace and silk material the curtain, "Really Orange, this mess is horrendous."

With a fist full of tablet already halfway in her mouth, Orange struggled to respond and not spit out half the content in her mouth as she motioned to the pillows beneath them, "It's...sort of picked up?"

Pearl's lip curled at her manners, watching as a few tablets fell from her lip and back to the tray, Orange doing her best to keep her half chewed pills in her mouth at the look. Making a hum of acknowledgement, Pearl responded, "I suppose it will do."

"I'll make sure to pick up before I have company again." The diamond lowered the tray, hand clear of more tablets and smiled as her friend shook her head in faked exasperation.

"Your lucky the Pumice should be able to repair your desk on their own." Pearl leaned back, becoming relaxed amongst the fine plush and company, "White would know if I had to call in a Bismuth."

"I'm not very good at this lock down thing." Orange turned, setting the tray down on the floor before turning back to her, "I honestly never thought I'd be doing this again."

The older gem studied her for a long moment, quiet as she questioned, "How are you feeling now?"

Orange made a noncommittal hum, hand raising and turning to make a so-so gesture, "All right. A lesson learned, I guess."

"To not make such a big mess?"

"To not sneak out." Orange chuckled, shrugging as she added, "Either that or do it better."

"Orange." Pearl stressed her name, unamused by the lack of seriousness she was giving now.

"What? It's better than the alternative."

"And that is?" She questioned.

Leaning back on her arms, Orange turned her head to look out at the darkened city, lit up solely by neon circuitry and the nearby spotlights on the Diamond's square. "Sulking until Yellow comes home."

"I suppose." Pearl agreed, all too aware by what she actually meant. She much preferred her pillow throwing to that. Staring out the window, Pearl added in a more thoughtful tone, "I'm surprised, really."

Orange cocked her head, looking over at her as she asked, "About what?"

"You didn't argue." At the Diamond's continued stare, she elaborated, "I thought you might try to reason with White Diamond."

"Mmm," Orange shrugged, "No. Blue explained to me about it. I mean, I don't think I did anything wrong, and this is absolutely unfair, but it could be worse."

Turning her head fully, Pearl gave her attention solely to the diamond as she continued to inquire, "So you gave in? No fight?"

"Yeah." Orange grimaced, remaining silent for a moment before she explained, "Yellow says you have to pick your battles. I can see the logic in that. I figure if I'm to ever really going to be arguing with White, I should save it for more important moments where she will listen to me."

"That's sounds startling wise of you."

Turning her own attention to Pearl, Orange rose an eyebrow at her, "Did you think I would pick a fight?"

"You're not exactly known for..." Pearl search for a better term before simply settling for, "remaining calm."

The young diamond had the decency to look sheepish at Pearl's words, "Am I really that bad?"

"Sometimes, not always. But honestly? It seemed...." Pearl stopped, genuinely unsure if she should continue, but the silent reassurance Orange offered her fueled her to answer honestly, "It seemed more like you were scared, then some plan of yours."

"Scared?" Orange parroted, "Scared of what?"

"Orange," Pearl tilted her head, imploring the gem beside her to not be so dismissive, "You can't ignore it forever."

Orange laughed, the sound loud and unnatural, especially to the older gem's ears. Leaning forward, the diamond rested her elbows against her raised knees, arms folding together as her hands splaying out over her forearms while she made another sound of amused disbelief, "Please, I don't..." Orange started and then stopped, voice trailing as she stilled, eyes unwilling to meet Pearl's as she continued to stare ahead of her. Her fingers tightened against her arms, her fingers digging marks into her skin the only real sign of her distress as she continued to hold a smile on her face, "It's not like that." Orange said after an uncomfortably long time, "Not for me."

Pearl sat forward too, attempting to pull her gaze back to her, but was unsuccessful. Still, she pushed on, "You're not immune to being scared. No one is."

"I never said I was. I meant," Orange swallowed, eyes flicking to her before turning down, leaning forward more to rest her chin against her crossed forearms, "I meant I won't be like the others. I'm not going to be scared of White just because she has...some moments."

"Moments?" Pearl sat up, eyebrows raising as she repeated the word, "Is that really how you see it?"

"I understand," Orange nodded her head as best she could in her position, "I understand why everyone else is afraid of White, but I won't be. She's just under a lot of stress, and I know I didn't help. I wasn't thinking, and I have to take responsibility for that." Orange shrugged again, eyes softening as she tilted her head enough to meet Pearl's round eyes, "I...I won't abandon her just because she was upset. You haven't left me, and I can get like that."

"You have never threatened my life." Pearl reasoned.

"She wasn't being serious." Orange challenged, "She wouldn't really. She would never." Quietly, almost as if she didn't want her to hear, Orange spoke into her arms as she softly added, "Not me."

Pearl's eyebrows turned up as she regarded the larger gem with a look that wasn't quite pity, but understanding nonetheless. She owed her continued existence to White Diamond. How could she argue over a topic she felt she had no real say in, not that she wished to start an argument in the first place.

Pearl attempted to smile as she tried for a happier tone, commenting "I suppose it really isn't too bad, is it? At least It's only until Yellow Diamond arrives."

"In a week." Orange sighed heavily, "A week I rather be free. I could be doing so much instead of," She freed one of her hands enough to motioning to the rooming around them with a small twist of her wrist, "this."

"It's only a week. That is nothing to a gem." Pearl countered.

"Thats easy to say when your not locked away in a room."

Pearl's jaw tensed, her mouth forming a thin line as she couldn't stop herself in time as she responded, "Than you shouldn't have left."

Cocking her head to the side again, Orange studied the gem beside her for a moment before questioning, "Are you angry with me too?"

Pearl clenched her hands over her sheer skirt, uncaring of the wrinkles she was causing in the delicate material, turning her head away from Orange so that she couldn't quite see her face, "I have no right to be angry with you."

"But you are?" The diamond pushed.

"Yes."

Lips quirking back, Orange lowered her eyes from her, ashamed at her friend's confirmation. "I'm sorry."

"If you were, than you wouldn't have done it in the first place." Pearl's voice was more forceful than she had been prepared for, sitting up as she whipped around to meet her eyes with a mixture of anger and hurt, "Do you have any idea how worried I was when I got that message?"

"I couldn't have known I would get in trouble, or that I even wasn't allowed." Orange argued, eyebrows raising at the change of tone suddenly being directed at her, "White let me wander around on my own-"

"In her palace." Pearl interjected, eyes narrowing at her.

"Since I was young-"

"Withan escort."

"She let me come back to my room on my own."

"Once!" Pearl's voice pitched up as she continued to go back and forth with Orange, her words stressed as she held up a finger at the younger gem for emphasis, "And that somehow meant you could leave?"

"Becoming apart of the Authority meant I could damn well leave!" Orange exploded, her voice loud and biting as it rose up over Pearl's, "Stop interrupting me, and don't treat me like a child!" The diamond pointed a finger right back at Pearl as she yelled, "I don't need you of all people nagging me too."

Pearl's first reaction was to recoil, both from the Diamond's sudden aggression, and her words, the smaller gem leaning back to move away from her hand. Her second reaction, as her words set in, was to narrow her eyes, mouth turning down as she scowled and reaching out to smack her hand away from her with the back of her hand.

This seemed to bring the young diamond back to reality, her eyes widening as she took in the look on Pearl face, the hurt evident, but it was the fury building behind it that scared her, an expression from the smaller gem she had never really had turned on her. Orange knew she had messed up before Pearl even had the chance to speak, holding her hands up in a show of apology, "I- Pearl, I'm so-"

"Do not speak to me that way, Orange Diamond." Pearl cut her off, her voice sharp with warning and barely concealed anger.

"Pearl-" Orange repeated, softer, as she attempted to reach out for the other gem, only to have her hands knocked back by another slap, her hands instantly pulling back against her chest in response.

"No!" The smaller gem shook her head, the tied spirals of hair on either side of her face shaking at the vigorous action, "You-you can't say kind words to me like you did before and then-" Pearl's breathing hitched, teeth clenching as her eyes closed tightly, her whole body pulling away from the young diamond as she turned and wrapped her arms over her mid section as she did, "I will not be spoken to like that. It's one thing when I am following orders, when I am just a servant. But when you say I mean such things to you, and then you talk to me like that..." Pearl paused again, tears forming at the corners of her eyes that she refused to let fall, even as she turned her head to look at Orange through half-lidded eyes, "It makes me question if you mean what you say. If you are not just toying with me because you can, or you think this is amusing, or-"

"No, no Pearl." Orange shook her head, eyes wide and pleading as she hesitantly reached out but stopped before she neared the other gem. Tears burned her own eyes as she fought to speak over the lump in her throat, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, really."

Pearl grit her teeth, unable to help herself as her voice raised again, "Stop telling me you're sorry!"

The young gem's eyebrows were pinched together so tightly thin lines form around her eyes and forehead, mouth half open and then closing as she struggled to speak, searching the other gem's face for her answer, for something that would not upset her further. "Then what do you want me to say?"

"I want you to do what you say you will." Pearl surprised Orange as she moved to get up, ignoring the pillows around them as her feet knocked into them while she stepped away from her, creating space between them as she kept her arms around herself, her head bent down as she spoke clearly, "I won't keep coming back if you're going to mouth off to me and then apologize like that makes it okay. I'm supposed to be your friend, not your punching bag when your upset."

"Pearl..." Orange kept her eyes on the other gem, even as she struggled to get up, but stopped once she was on her feet as to not scare her further away. "I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry." She repeated, shoulders shaking as she fought back tears that threatens to become sobs if she let them, her hands still held out toward her, "I know you said to stop saying that, I'm just... I didn't know you felt that way. I didn't realize I-" Her teeth clenched, eyes falling away from Pearl at the same time as she moved to look up at her, unable to meet her eyes as she admitted, "I didn't know I was hurting you."

Pearl remained silent, still turned partially away from her, but continued to watch her. Half of her wanted to move towards her as she witnessed the thick tears on her face that the larger gem no longer held back, the uncontrollable shaking as she bit her lip to keep from making more than a the small noises that were already escaping her. The other half, somewhat cruelly, wished to wait, and allow her to break further under her silence, to let her feel some of the things she had. After a few moments of watching her, Pearl turned her head away, unable to let it continue, "And now you do."

Orange pulled in deep breaths through her teeth, unable to shop the shaking of her body, but managing to get a hold of her tears enough to be able to speak, "I do. I do mean it." Hesitantly, and with a lot of caution, she took a step forward. Waiting before taking another, even as Pearl turned her head at the motion, eyes sharp and watchful. "I meant every word Pearl. I'm a horrible person, I have issues, and I get so damn angry sometimes, but I meant it," Orange stopped a few steps away from Pearl, giving her the option to move away, but she never did, allowing Orange to remain near her as she pleaded, "I swear I meant it. I really do feel those things for you. Please don't leave me."

"I don't want to go..." Pearl admitted, her eyes falling away from the taller gem, "but I have more respect for my self than to stay for that." Her voice dropped, low and quiet, and if Orange hadn't been so close and so solely focused on her, she might not have picked it up, "I won't do it again, not for you, not for anyone."

"I won't," The diamond promised, "I won't do it again. I won't lose my temper with you, I'm sorry." Orange reached out, hand slow as they reached across the space between them, surprised when Pearl did not instantly pull away, encouraged by this to slowly wrap her hands around the ones either side of her, coaxing her until she allowed her to intertwine her hands with hers and pull them to be in between them. Both of their eyes remained on their hands, the larger gem giving the tiny hands in her own a soft squeeze as she tilted her head to speak, "I can't lose you Pearl. Anyone but you."

Taking a deep breath, Pearl turned her body to be face to face with the diamond, eyes traveling from there hands and up to her face, where she held eye contact with her, "I'm tired of being yelled at, Orange. I'm only trying to help you."

"I know," the tall gem gave her a watery smile, "I know, and you do. You really do."

"Then I wish you would show it. You really scared me. I was..." Pearl tilted her head down, pulling in a quick breath between her lips, "I was busy when I got that message. To have to run back to deliver it, and then to stand by as my Diamond lost her temper, I was scared." Pearl admitted, tilting her head back so Orange could see her face once more, to see the fear and sadness in her eyes at the memory, "For you, for me. I thought, for a moment, she might..."

Orange waited as her voice trailed off, giving her a moment to continue on her own before she gently prodded, "You thought White Diamond would hurt you?"

"Me?" Pearl said incredulously, eyebrows scrunching up as she stared at her, realizing she was being serious, "You!"

Orange blinked, startled by her raised voice, and confused at the implication. "You thought she would really hurt me? You know she wouldn't."

"She threatened to kill you not even a full cycle ago!"

"She didn't mean it," Orange challenged, attempting to not allow herself to become defensive as she reasoned, "It was only to scare me, and it worked. She just doesn't want me slacking and breaking the rules. You know she wouldn't actually do it."

Pearl closed her eyes, sighing deeply before leaning forward, surprising the tall gem as she rested her forehead against her chest, her head pressing into the side of her gem as she angled it to be able to speak quietly without muffling herself into the diamond's tunic, "You have such faith in her."

"Of course." She agreed, "White is...White is apart of my family." Orange explained, "I care for her greatly, like I know she does me. She just shows it differently. Not always in the best way, but she does."

"Heh..." Pearl breathed out the soft laugh, shaking her head at the diamond's reasoning, though it was not unkind, "I don't understand you sometimes. You use those organic terms, but hate to see yourself as apart of them. White can't stand it, but you call her family anyway. How do you just ignore parts and accept the others?"

"I-" Orange began and then stopped, her face scrunching up as she gently pulled away from pearl, turning her head away just as she looked up at her in question. She worried her lower lip between her teeth, and Pearl squeezed her hands in a small act of comfort, uncertain what to do as the taller gem seemed to be working out something in her head. A moment later, Pearl's patients were rewards as Orange turned back, chin tilted down as she looked back down at her, though she could see the same uncertainty in her eyes as she spoke, "It's complicated. I know I'm not...I'm not fully like any of you. The Diamonds have done their best to make it seem like I'm just another diamond, and I've tried, I tryto fit into that box. I try to shape myself into a mold I wasn't made with, so it's easier for everyone. If I can be what they want, what they need, I can be of use to them, I'll have a purpose. But I know it isn't me."

Orange pulled her hands always from Pearl's, the smaller gem not attempting to stop her as she did so, her arms crossing over her chest as she tilted her head down, eyes falling away from Pearl's as shame colored her cheeks. "I feel....There are things I feel that tell me this isn't right, but what am I supposed to do? If I'm not a diamond, then who am I?"

The corners of Pearl's lips tugged down, her eyebrows tilted up as she regarded the larger gem who looked much smaller in that moment. Stepping closer, Pearl reached up, placing a hand onto her arm in comfort, pulling her eyes to her as she spoke, "You're Orange. What more do you need to be?"

The young diamond's stance relaxed, shoulders lowering from their tense position as she looked at her with watery eyes, a quiet sniffle escaping her as she gave her a wavering smile, fighting off more tears as she spoke, "That's one of the things I like about being with you. I don't feel like I have to ignore that part of me all the time. You know what I am, but you don't treat me like I'm fragile or broken somehow. I'm just another person to you, my titles simply silly medals you don't have to acknowledge unless we're in public. You're not afraid I'm going to shatter you for saying the wrong thing, or somehow wronging me with your presence. You're there for me even when I'm so much less than the friend you deserve."

"Don't say that."

"It's true." Orange's smile turned sardonic, a sarcastic chuckle leaving her as she shrugged, turning her head away as she reached a hand up to wipe at the tears on her face with the heel of her palm. "I'm a brat, I know I am. I can be so mean to you. You're right to be angry, and upset, and to question everything." The young diamond shook her head, hand moving from her eyes to cover her face as she laughed again, "You're too smart for this. I can't imagine being with someone as cracked as I am."

"Shut up!" Pearl shouted, surprising the taller gem enough to lower her hand to look at her as she shook her head, cheeks tinting a darker shade as she glared up at her, though Orange could see no real anger behind it, only frustration as she struggled to find what she wanted to say. "I don't want to hear- You're not-" she paused, taking very quick breaths as she calmed herself. Finding her voice, Pearl spoke steadily, making a point to look up at the gem as she did, "You're not cracked. You're not broken, or...you're perfect just the way you are. It's my choice if your worthy to be my friend, no one else gets to tell me that. I just wish you didn't turn my help back on me as you do sometimes."

Orange surprised Pearl by taking the step forward, reaching out and pulling her forward to wrap her in her arms in a tight hug. Pearl took only a moment to react, returning it as she placed her arms around her, head knocking into her gem as she did, but largely went ignored as the two held the hug. Orange bent slightly, resting her chin on the top of Pearl head as she sniffed. "I want to promise you I'm not going to do it again, but I know I will. Im awful at controlling myself, and I'm going to drive you away sooner or later."

"Then we need to work on it." Pearl responded, pulling back to look her in the face, eyes bright as she added, "That is something we can do together. I'm still here."

"You're still here." The diamond repeated, marveling at the smaller gem in her arms.

Pearl stilled, taken by the softness of the Diamond's eyes, the adoration she could feel pointed at her. In a split decision, she leaned forward, rising up on the tips of her toes to press her lips again Orange's as her hands gripped the back of her tunic for leverage.

Orange, in response, nearly broke the kiss as she rose her head up in surprise, not at all expecting the smaller gem to have done so. Acting quickly, the diamond responded in kind, hands pulling her closer as they splayed across her back, tilting her head back down to shorten the distance between them. The kiss was chaste, lasting only a moment more before Pearl pulled back and Orange blinked, drawing in a small breath through her lips as she and pearl tilted there heads together, the diamond's eyes remaining on Pearl's face as her own closed, the content little smile on her face tugging at every hectic emotion that bounced around in her gem.

"Pearl?" Orange said, her questioning tone making Pearl look at her through half-lidded eyes, "Does that mean...?"

"It means i'm willing to stay, Orange. I'm staying for you."

"But...," Orange pulled back a little more, coming out of her shock of the situation to be a little more serious, forcing Pearl to drop back down to her feet as Orange moved, "the way you're saying that? Pearl, if your still not completely sure, then just tell me, but is this your way of telling me your decision?"

"It means," Pearl answered, her words slow as if she were picking each one carefully and deliberately, "That I want this. Whatever it is your offering. But..."

Orange breathed hard, elation being cut short as the single word caught in her head, stopping the smile that wanted to break out across her face from fully forming, her eyebrows raising as she repeated the word pressingly, "But?"

"I'm- i'm just..." Pearl tilted her head down, chin pressing into her chest as she avoided meeting Orange's eyes, her hands slipping down from the back of Orange's tunic to the belt secured around her midsection, grasping onto the hard edge of it. Eventually, in a shaky breath, Pearl looked back up, her eyes wide and becoming wet as tears formed, her hands gripping onto her belt as she forced herself to continue, "I'm scared she'll find out."

"Who?" Orange questioned softly, one hand slipping from her back to come up and hold the side of Pearl's face, thumb pad wiping at the trail of tears that started to create a glossy line against her cheek.

"Who else? White Diamond." Her eyebrows bunched up, eyes wide and shimmering as she surprised her own self at the forcefulness she had spoken a name that would have normally been revered every time it had fallen from her mouth, like a holy pray. Now it was only a curse. "If White knows, if my Diamond finds out, she'll take it all away. You'll be punished, and she'll do it again."

Orange tilted her head, confusion scrunching up her face, "Do it again? Pearl?"

"If she ever knew, about any of this, it'll be something she can use against you. I don't want to be the reason she hurts you." Pearl said as she turned her head to lean back against Orange's chest, hiding her face as she continued to cry.

Orange, momentarily unsure of what to do with her suddenly free hand, pursed her lips as she looked down at Pearl's bowed head before settling to replace it onto Pearl's back, pulling her a little closer as she held her. She remained silent for a long moment, swallowing a lump that had formed in her throat as she absorbed what the smaller gem had said, eyebrows lowering over her eyes as she gave her words serious consideration.

Taking a deep breath, Orange angled her head down, chin nearly touching her chest as she made the effort to look down at the small gem, one hand moving up to cup the back of her head, careful of the twists of hair as she did. "It's alright, Pearl. It'll all be alright."

Pearl shook her head, pushing back against Orange's soft grasp, her head cradled in her hand as she tilted it back to look up at her, "You're going to leave too."

"Of course I am," Orange responded, confused but pushing on in an effort to calm her, "but I won't be far. We can still see each other, just like we do now.

"How are we supposed to hide anything?" Pearl questioned, "How are we supposed to do this? White will know! She always knows."

Orange gently shook her head, smiling as she canted forward, placing her forehead against hers, "But she won't. Don't be scared because you think White will punish me. She won't."

"She will. She will, Orange. Don't be so naive." Pearl pleaded.

"I'm not," the Diamond said, still smiling despite pearl's expression, "I'm not ignorant to how she is, I'm just not scared."

"You should be."

"Or I could be brave." Orange proposed instead, "I could trust that we already know what we're doing. I'll keep myself out of trouble, and she's never had a reason to doubt you, right? She'll never have a reason to look our way, we have nothing to fear."

Closing her eyes, Pearl took a deep breath, quelling the flow of tears from her eyes as she attempted to find belief in the young diamond's words. Opening them, she returned Orange's waiting gaze, "I want this, so badly, but if it means losing you, I can't, Orange."

"You won't lose me." Orange promised, "You can't lose me, I'm not White's to take. We can do this. No one has to know, we can do this. We've been able to hide so far, right?" The tall gem grinned, trying to lighten the heavy moment, "What's another secret between us?"

"Living and being shattered." Pearl responded, the grin dropping from Orange's face in an instant.

"White wouldn't shatter another Diamond." The young diamond countered quietly.

"But I am just a pearl." Pearl said, "I'm Disposable."

"Then she is a fool." Orange said more harshly than she had meant, Pearl inching her head back a little at her raised voice in response. Orange lowered her voice, offering a small smile to Pearl as she added, "But it won't happen, not to you. I will fight for us if i have to."

"Don't be reckless." Pearl begged, her hand letting go of the diamond's belt to move between them, hand reaching up to frame the side of her face, "Don't ruin things just for me. This isn't something you can win with a show of strength. Especially not against White."

"I'm not going to go up to her and demand the right to court you Pearl." Orange scoffed, "I'm not stupid. I just mean-"

"Court?" Pearl echoed, eyes widening with surprise.

"Well, Yes," Orange stammered, momentarily knocked off her train of though, "that's my intent. I mean, if your interested." Orange waited, dread building as Pearl failed to respond before she was attempted to fix the situation, "Or we could just play it by ear if that's not something-"

"Gems haven't-" pearl interrupted, her tone inquisitive and confused all at once, "Where did you even- no." She cut herself off, closing her eyes briefly as she did, as if suddenly remembering their previous conversation, "It will get you killed."

"Or it won't." Orange said, her conviction clear in voice as she leveled the gem in her arms with a look, asking her to trust her, "I mean it. I'm stronger than you know, Pearl. I'll do what I have to. We will can do it. You'll never have to face White alone. I'm here."

"I can almost believe you." Pearl smiled in spite of herself, "I want to. But I'm still scared."

"I know." Orange returned her smile, leaning in to place a small kiss against her lips, cheeks tinting a red as she pulled back, the joy quite obvious on her face as her smile broke into a full grin, "We'll figure it out. One step at a time. Like a dance."

Pearl laughed, shaking her head softly at her, enjoying the small moment as she endeavored to commit the look on the young diamond's face to memory, the blatant affection and warmth pointed at her like she had never seen. Raising her eyebrows, Pearl playfully questioned, "Are you going to try and court me with your dancing skills?"

"You know," Orange said, straightening her neck as she stood up, Pearl following her as her hands fell from her face, and Orange's hand lowered from her head, "I saw humans do that once. On Pink's colony." She supplied at Pearl's inquisitive stare, "Think It'll work on you?"

"You can try."

Releasing her hold on Pearl, Orange stepped back, momentarily confusing the smaller gem until she placed her hand behind her, the other extending out to her as she tilted forward, an impish grin forming on her face as she inclined her head to ask, "Care to dance?"

Pearl took the offered hand, a knowing smile on her face as she responded, "You can tell me just where you learned about courting while you show me these dancing skills you say you have."

Orange smiled brightly, pulling her close as the moved together slowly, mindful of the pillows still scattered around them. "It would be my pleasure."

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This ship has left port, Hope your all safely on board!

Also, the results are in! You guys have decided, Orange and Pearl's ship name is SunSet!

Special thanks to Also-Not-So-Anonymous for being the one to suggest it!