I wonder what it is like
To be confident
Proud of myself
I wonder
I truly do

~~~~~~~~~~

Sometimes
I am proud of myself
Not often
Just sometimes
When someone else
Compliments
My work
Compliments me
That is when
I allow pride
To fill me
But any other time
I'll tuck it away
Far away
Waiting for the light of day

~~~~~~~~~~

I am not proud of myself
I am insecure
So insecure
So foolish
It's true
That's just how I am
I should accept that
But I struggle
To change myself
To be something else
Something that I'm not
Into something
That is almost
Unrecognizable
So
Unlike
Me

~~~~~~~~~~

I should let go
Of any past moments
That still haunt me
But
I don't
I don't know why
I just don't
And every time
I think about those things
The anger
Flames back
Like a rapid fire
Burning
Itching
To be released
In any way possible
But I won't
Won't let go
Won't hold on
Just ignore

~~~~~~~~~~

I don't know why I feel so pressured
To do well
To be great
If all I am doing
Is writing for myself
And it's hard
Hard to be great
When you doubt yourself
Every
Single
Day