starlit supernova
❛ i. saving grace ❜

━━━━━ NOVA'S PARENTS CALLED her a saving grace. It was no shock they would. She was their child — adoptive child or not. (But why they didn't just call her Grace instead of Nova, she didn't know.) Her adoptive parents, Lee and Gail Holloway insisted, however, that she did save them.

               She didn't know the story until she was older — around eleven or so. She remembers learning after her eleventh birthday, which was the day Minerva McGonagall appeared at the Holloways' front door, saying that Nova had magical blood (or was a memorable birthday for such a seemingly forgettable age). Nova knew she was adopted — she looked like neither of her parents, and they thought it was best not to lie about everything; however, Nova didn't know that her parents wished upon a star for Nova.

               Lee and Gail started dating ten years before Nova was born, October 9th, 1969; they married three years before she was born, October 9th, 1976; Nova was born on their third anniversary, October 9th, 1979. It was easy to say that October 9th was a special day to the Holloways — only it was a bit more special than Nova ever knew. Her parents — Gail, specifically — struggled with infertility, and so desperately did Lee and Gail want a child. It was something Gail was very honest about with Lee when she first met him; she never hid the truth of her infertility from him, not even on their first date. But Lee was optimistic (something that has stayed with him over the years), and he was determined that they would beat the odds.

               But they didn't — not in the way they expected, at least. A "tradition" of sorts Lee and Gail had created was wishing upon stars (they had also vowed to name their children after stars; so perhaps that's why they called her Nova — from her birth name — rather than something like Grace). They had wished upon stars every year on October 9th for a child — every year until 1979, long after they had lost hope, but continued for the sake of the tradition. For ten years, they had wished, and after ten years, their prayers were answered. Two days after October 9th, 1979, the Holloways received a call from their agency, saying that a child named Caroline had been placed in the adoption system by her nameless mother. Lee and Gail didn't waste a minute before agreeing to take Caroline in; in time, roughly a year later, they would legally adopt Caroline and change her name to Nova Caroline.

               That's how Nova Holloway became a "saving grace". However, don't let that fool you. Nova felt like she was anything but a saving grace. In fact, she felt like she was more likely to follow her namesake and cause a colossal explosion — a supernova.

✴

September 1st meant that Nova's summer was over. It was easy to say she wasn't happy about it, either; however, she wasn't unhappy, either. She enjoyed summer; she liked the freedom that came from no school — but she loved Hogwarts. Hogwarts was a second home, a home away from her parents but with friends who felt like family. She loved talking with her friends, basically living with them in her Hufflepuff dorm room, and she loved learning (if she was interested in the topic; that meant she automatically hated History of Magic), but Nova hated the amount of work her teachers assigned. And just like her older Hufflepuff classmates had promised her, the schoolwork was increasing by dangerous amounts every year.

               Nova wasn't a bad student, by any means. She just found it ... difficult to keep her nose in the books (and you can't blame her, alright? Those dusty books from the Hogwarts library stunk!) And you really can't blame her — so many other important things were going on!

               The "many other important things" were finding her birth mother. That, or re-reading the letter written by Nova's birth mother. And if Nova wasn't re-reading that letter, she was looking into another lead that would surely lead to another dead-end on where her birth mother went. However, at the rate Nova was going, it seemed she was never going to get her wish — or anything else other than writing four scrolls worth about the dangers of sticking your hand inside a boiling cauldron. (That was a real assignment; apparently, Professor Snape didn't share the same humor with Ernie Macmillan.)

               "Mum," Nova groaned. "You do this every year ..."

               Gail Holloway blinked tears out of her eyes. "You're gone for so long, Noves."

               Nova frowned. "S'only for nine months, Mum." She knew that was a long time, but she couldn't help herself but to say it. Gail and Lee were both overly sentimental, and her parents always became teary-eyed when the end of August came. "I mean ... I'll be back before you know it. I'll tell you all about the cool things I learn!"

               Her parents were Muggles — no magical capabilities whatsoever. And that means they could never explore the wizarding world with Nova. It was hard in the beginning, but they found a way around it with her owl, Lyrid. Nova would send letters — about everything she was learning, tell her parents she was alright, and make sure that her parents were never caught on that she was considered weird by wizarding standards (her dreams were not normal).

               "Weekly letters," Lee reminded her.

               "Weekly letters," his daughter agreed.

               Lee Holloway tried to be the "man" of the house, but he was just as easy to tears as Gail. Not that he wasn't strong, but he didn't fit the typical look of masculinity. With a thin, wiry frame, and mousy brown hair, Lee Holloway would never look "masculine" — whatever that meant.

               "And you'll focus on your schoolwork instead of that silly letter!" added Gail, waving her hand.

               Nova's face churned. That was harder to agree to. She eyed her brown trunk, where she knew her birth mother's letter was. "I will," she answered, nodding to Gail. But Nova could hardly even convince herself.

               She gave her parents one last hug before making sure no Muggles were looking her way. Nova grabbed and wheeled her trolley through the entrance to platform nine and three-quarters. Soon, the Hogwarts Express was there — a scarlet stream engine, puffing smoke over a platform packed with wizards and witches seeing their children off for a new school year at Hogwarts.

               Nova wheeled her trolley around the gatherings of people, hauling her stuff onto the train. She had already said her goodbyes, and now, she had to find an empty compartment — or a compartment with any friends. Luckily, she found some friends fairly quickly. Nova could hear Ernie Macmillan and Justin Finch-Fletchley bickering about the best Quidditch teams. She swung the compartment door open, startling them from their argument; she had her trunk in one hand and Lyrid in the other. Hannah Abbott stood up quickly, took Lyrid's cage, and placed him next to her cat, Oncilla.

               "Personally, I say Montrose Magpies are great," expressed Nova, pulling her trunk inside.

               Ernie frowned at her. "Why's that?"

               Nova never had much interest in Quidditch, especially considering she hated flying with brooms. The other three in the compartment knew that, so they all looked at her curiously, wondering if she had a sudden change of heart over the summer.

               She shrugged. "Magpies are cute."

               Ernie rolled his eyes dramatically. "'Course you'd say that, Nova."

               Hannah grinned, settling back into her seat. "I like the Appleby Arrows."

               Justin leaned forward in his seat. "They haven't won in forever, though ..."

               Nova put her trunk overhead in the storage. "Who won the Cup last?"

               "Uh — Canada, I think."

               Nova sat next to Ernie, looking between her three friends. They all had a much bigger interest in the sport than she did. "How d'you think it's lining up for the '94 Cup?" she asked, only to entertain the others' interest.

               Ernie grinned. "I think Ireland's got a shot at winning this year!"

               The black-haired girl rolled her eyes. "Country pride much?"

               Ernie shrugged. "Well, of course."

               Justin huffed. "It's got to be Scotland this year," he insisted, puffing out his chest.

               Hannah snorted into her knuckles. "You're only saying that because you think that Scottish girl is hot!"

               Justin flushed and sputtered, "That's — that's not true, Hannah!"

               "Totally not," Nova agreed sarcastically, rolling her eyes.

               Justin blushed worse — from the roots of his blond hair all the way down to his wiry fingers. "I can't wait until one of you has a crush. Just so you know — payback's a bitch!"

               Ernie snorted. "Sure you will."

               "What's her name?" Nova asked, leaning over to Justin. "Isn't she a year older than us or something?"

               "She's a Ravenclaw, right?" asked Hannah. "Dara something. I can't remember her last name."

               Justin scowled at them. "I can't wait until one of you gets a crush," he repeated.

               Nova waved her hand dismissively. "I had a crush on this seventh year for so long and you never figured it out. What makes you think you could figure it out if I liked anyone else?"

               Hannah brought Oncilla onto her lap, petting the cat in a repetitive motion. "Yeah, Nova was super obvious about it. But Rhys was cool about it."

               "I don't know what subtly is," Nova admitted carelessly, shrugging.

               "Yeah, we know," Ernie responded without missing a beat.

               Nova smacked his arm. "You don't know it, either."

✴

The train rattled onward, heading for Hogwarts. The rain was pouring against the windows, making it nearly impossible to see outside. The wind was roaring past, warning everyone about what kind of storm they were in for.

               But none of that seemed to matter to the four Hufflepuffs, who were all stashed away in a compartment on their own. They had bought loads of stuff from the trolley lady, enough to have three piles nearly as tall as Nova's torso. (It was called Honeydukes Express, but barely anyone ever called it that.) Justin even had brought some Muggle card games to teach Ernie and Hannah about since those two hadn't been raised around Muggles.

               However, the card games Justin had brought were even mysteries to Nova — somehow who was raised by two completely Muggle parents. Eventually, they realized the card games weren't worth the hassle, nor the small spat Nova and Ernie had. ("Didn't you pay attention?" Ernie rolled his eyes at the girl.

               Nova flushed. "Says the boy who's lost the last four rounds —"

               "Have not!")

               Hannah grew tired of their bickering, ripping the cards out of Nova, Ernie, and Justin's hands, and she tucked them all back into a pile and stuffed them into Justin's trunk. She sat back down and looked out the dark window. "We must be nearly there."

               The words had barely left her mouth when the train started to slow down.

               "Thank you, Merlin." Nova groaned. "I'm nearly starved!" She started to stand up, reaching for the stuff she had put overhead, but Ernie stopped her.

               "I swore we had a couple more hours," he said, frowning. "We haven't been traveling long enough yet ..."

               She frowned back at her friend. "What? Why are we stopping then?"

               Just after Nova finished, the train came to a full stop with a small jolt. She stumbled forward, knocking her knees into the seat. As the noise of the pistons fell away, the wind and rain sounded louder than ever against the windows. Loud thuds resounded from throughout the train, signaling that tons of luggage had fallen out of their racks. Then, without warning, the lamps all around them went out and they were plunged into total darkness.

               The four were quiet for a moment, then Nova cursed; "What the hell?" She stood up, keeping a hand on the seat in front of her. "This is like a horror movie," she spoke. "This is exactly what happens when the killer is about to show up."

               "Horror movie?" Ernie asked. (Stupid Purebloods and their zero knowledge about Muggle things.)

               Hannah's voice pitched three octaves higher; "Killer?!"

               "Nova's not being serious, Hannah," Justin promised. "And it's not a horror movie."

               Nova glared in the direction Justin's voice was coming from. "That's what they always say in the movies."

               "Nova shut up!" Justin snapped at her.

               "If I could see you, I would totally punch you," the girl told him.

               She heard someone stand up and shuffle around. She heard the compartment door slide open.

               "D'you think we've broken down?" Hannah asked, mostly to herself.

               "Well, of course," Ernie answered back. His voice came from farther away, Nova was pretty sure he was looking out the compartment door. "But why?" he said.

               "Where's my wand ...?" Nova muttered, patting down her back pockets and jacket pockets. "I'm gonna use Lumos or something."

               "Ernie, get back in here," Justin said, sounding nervous. "We just need to wait it out."

               "Wait —" Ernie said. "I see someone."

               Nova grabbed her wand (a nice wand made out of alder wood and with unicorn hair for its core) and muttered Lumos — a blueish light erupted from the tip of her wand, and Nova swung it across the compartment. She could see Justin and Hannah peering at her, squinting their eyes at the sudden burst of light; Ernie was peering outside the compartment, looking down the train's corridor.

               "Merlin, Ernie, that's so creepy," Nova said. "Are you pulling my leg about not knowing horror movies or what?"

               Ernie only waved her over. "Come here. I need that light."

               Nova didn't want to listen, but she steeled her nerves and shuffled over. She stopped beside Ernie, holding out her wand into the dark hallway. All along the carriage, heads were sticking curiously out of their compartments. No one seemed to know what was going on, either.

               "You said you saw someone?" she asked anxiously, peering around the dark train.

               "Yeah ..." murmured Ernie. "Somewhere over there." He pointed down the corridor, but the vagueness didn't help Nova see anything.

               "I don't see anything." Nova shook her head, ducking back inside the Hufflepuffs' compartment. "I'm telling you — we just need to stay here and wait for the train to be up and working again."

               "I really saw someone," insisted Ernie, frowning at Nova. He sounded offended that she didn't believe him. "They had dark, large robes on. I wanna say it was black, but, well, you know, it's dark out there."

               "Forget it," Nova insisted, pulling Ernie back inside. She closed the door with her elbow before holding back up her wand to see inside. "Someone will get the train up and going again."

               Behind her, the compartment door slowly started to slide open. Standing in the dark doorway, illuminated by Nova's wandlight, was a cloaked figure that towered up to the ceilings. Nova couldn't see its face — completely hidden beneath the black hood. Her eyes darted downward, and her stomach crawled into her throat, stopping her from croaking. There was a band protruding from the cloak — glistening, greyish, slimy-looking, and scabbed. It looked like it came from a corpse, something that had been decaying in water for a long time. But it was only visible for a split second; it was as if the creature beneath the cloak knew Nova was watching. The hand suddenly was withdrawn into the folds of the black cloak.

               Closest to the door, Nova gasped and backed up. She bumped into Ernie, hearing him take in a sharp gasp of air.

               As if copying Ernie, the thing — whatever it was — started to draw a long, slow, rattling breath. It was like the creature was trying to suck in something more than just air — maybe them. An intense cold swept over them all; Nova felt her breath catch in her chest. The cold went deeper than her skin. It was inside her chest, her DNA, it was inside her very heart ...

               It wasn't just like a cold; it was like a poison — a poison seeping into her blood, crawling and invading the organs of her body. It was like her head had been covered in a layer of ice. She felt her body go stiff as a board.

               She felt like she was being pulled along, brush scratching at her legs as if she was running. She heard screaming — Nova thought it might've been her Housemates but it was too far away to be them. Besides, it sounded like ... like a man.

               Ernie backed away, and Nova fell to the ground. There was a flash, something like lightning crashed, and her eyes rolled back into her head.

               Everything went dark, but only for a moment. There was that man's scream again, Nova heard it in the distance. There was a green flash, like a spell. A dog's bark. And then a wolf's howl —

               The images and sounds sharpened, no longer did Nova feel like she was viewing everything through a dirty window. Above her, she caught a glimpse of something dark and shaggy passing over her; the thing temporarily blocked the starry night sky. It looked like a dog; a large, shaggy, black dog.

               She heard the dog's bark a second time.

               "Then you should have died!" a man screamed in her ear.

               Nova heard the sound of a blade being sharpened, the sound sent a chill up her spine. It was like every hair on her arms stood on end. Newspaper clippings — a tattooed man with an aged face. He was snarling in the moving picture as if snapping at the camera.

               A whipping tree flashed across her eyes, ripping away the paper clippings. A teacup replaced the moving tree, showcasing its tea leaves proudly. It looked like a dog, but then the leaves started moving — the dog started moving. The teacup swirled and then the dog appeared in front of Nova, running full force.

               She opened her mouth to scream, but it wasn't her voice, it was a misty, maddening voice; "Accept or you will lose yourself, Caroline!"

               "— Nova!"

               The girl shot up, hitting her head against someone else's — they both cried out in pain. Nova noticed how her cheeks were wet with tears. (How embarrassing, crying in front of others — actually, that wasn't important.) Nova's ears rang loudly, her skin tingling from the cold that thing brought.

               The lanterns above her were alight, and the floor was shaking — the Hogwarts Express was moving again. Ernie and Hannah crouched over her, but Justin was gone.

               "Nova, are you okay?" asked Hannah.

               "Yeah." Nova's voice was croaky. She winced and cleared her throat. "I — Yeah, I am." Her body was sore, and her limbs were stiff as she tried to sit up. She was still on the floor, her wand lying beside her. The Lumos spell had been broken.

               "Nova, you fainted," said Ernie, sounding worried. "Really, are you alright? If we had known you were close to fainting, I wouldn't have —"

               "I'm fine," Nova insisted. "Where's Justin?" She tried to stand, but Hannah kept her on the ground, shaking her head.

               Ernie was pale, paler than he already normally was, and his forehead looked beaded with sweat. "Justin went to get someone. You passed out and we didn't know what else to do. He's gone to get a seventh year — maybe Cedric if he finds him."

               Nova peered between the two. "What happened?" she asked. "What was all that noise?"

               "Noise?" repeated Ernie. "Nova, the noise was you. You were screaming, then muttering — it was like you were going mad ..."

               Hannah sent Ernie a look. "Justin will be back soon, Nova. He'll be happy to see you're okay."

               "But the noise," insisted Nova, smacking away Hannah's hands. "People screaming — a man screaming."

               Ernie and Hannah exchanged a look. Nova frowned and looked between them. They didn't believe her.

               The silence was only broken when Justin appeared in the doorway to their compartment. He looked relieved to see Nova conscious, but she still gave Hannah and Ernie weary looks. "Cedric told me about this man on board. Thinks the man's the new Defense professor.

               Hannah frowned. "What could he do?"

               Justin shrugged. "Wouldn't he know a spell to make sure Nova's alright? A Charm or something?"

               "Alright, then." Ernie waved Justin over. "Help me carry Nova over."

               "I'm not paralyzed," quipped Nova. "My legs are working fine, Ernie."

               "I don't care," Ernie fired back. "C'mon. We're gonna find that professor."

               The four left the compartment, Justin and Ernie led Nova all the way to the end of the train, where Justin opened the door on the right. The people inside, about five or six of them, all looked at the Hufflepuffs standing in the doorway.

               "Uh, sir?" Justin spoke first, talking to the older man in the compartment. "Can you, uh, check on Nova? She passed out from the attack."

               "You're being dramatic," Nova grumbled. "I only fell."

               Ernie shot her a cold look. "You passed out."

               The older man ushered Nova inside, leading her by the back. He was wearing a set of shabby wizard robes; he looked ill and exhausted. Despite having a relatively young face, his brown hair was sprinkled with grey. He grabbed a slab of chocolate (at least, it looked like chocolate), snapped off a section, and held it out to Nova.

               "Eat," he told her, setting it in the palm of her hand. "You'll feel better if you do."

               Nova looked at the others in the compartment with the man; she recognized them all as Gryffindors. Neville Longbottom, Hermione Granger, Ron Weasley, Ginny Weasley, and Harry Potter (whom she had never spoken to before, purposely, mind you. Try talking to the boy who had been plaguing your dreams for as long as you could remember). Above them, on the luggage rack, she spotted a small, battered case that was held together with a large quantity of neatly knotted string. The name Professor R. J. Lupin was stamped across one corner in peeling letters.

               "It was a dementor, wasn't it?" Ernie asked suddenly. "The thing that made Nova pass out?"

               A cold shiver crawled its way up Nova's spine. She knew what dementors were — nothing good.

               "Yes, it was, Mr. ...?" Lupin prompted for a name.

               "Ernie Macmillan," he said. He pointed to Hannah and then to Justin. "Hannah Abbott and Justin Finch-Flecthley."

               Nova held the chocolate but hadn't taken a bite yet. "Nova Holloway."

               Lupin looked at her. "Eat," he insisted. "You'll feel better."

               Nova stared at the man. "How'd a dementor get on the train?"

               Lupin's expression looked pained. Maybe he had passed out, as well. He grabbed the large slab of chocolate again, breaking off pieces and handing them around to the students there.

               "The thing looked ready to suck Nova's soul out of her body," Justin whispered, looking scared. "But then it just ... stopped."

               "As if it sensed something better," agreed Hannah. "Its head — if you can even call it that — perked up and seemed to have sensed something better."

               Silently, the Gryffindors all looked at Harry, who was holding onto a large piece of chocolate tightly. His piece of chocolate looked uneaten.

               "It was from Azkaban," Lupin spoke up, breaking the silence. "The dementor."

               Everyone stared at him. Professor Lupin crumpled up the empty chocolate wrapper and put it in his pocket. "Eat," he repeated. "It'll help. No one can leave this compartment after me. I need to speak to the driver, excuse me ..."

               He strolled past them and disappeared down the corridor.

               "Here, Nova," Hannah said, holding out her piece of chocolate. "I don't need it."

               Nova only shook her head in response. She sunk into the open seat closest to her. Her head pounded like someone was using her skull as a drum. She looked around to see if the other people there were eating, deciding if any of them looked ill (Lupin may have poisoned it, you never know). If any of them looked ill, it was Harry—his hairline was beaded with sweat, a scar in the shape of a lightning bolt appeared as he wiped the sweat away, and his green eyes looked shocked and hollowed with fear.

               "Are you sure you're okay, Harry?" Hermione Granger asked, looking at the boy worriedly.

               Nova had always thought Hermione was pretty, in a studious type of way (but everything with Hermione seemed to have a studious aspect to it). The girl had long, coily hair that was pulled into a slicked-back ponytail at the back of her head. Her ears poked out slightly, and Nova could see the small golden earrings she had chosen for the day.

               "I don't get it," Harry said, wiping more sweat off his face. "What happened?"

               "Well — that thing — the dementor — stood there and looked around — I mean, I think it did, I couldn't see its face — and you — you —" Hermione started to say, her eyes looking glassy with tears.

               "I thought you were having a fit or something," spoke Ron, who looked scared. "You went sort of rigid and fell out of your seat and started twitching —"

               Hannah and Ernie glanced at Nova, who glared at them to keep quiet.

               "And Professor Lupin stepped over you, and walked toward the dementor, and pulled out his wand," continued Hermione, "and he said, 'None of us is hiding Sirius Black under our cloaks. Go.' But the dementor didn't move, so Lupin muttered something, and a silvery thing shot out of his wand at it, and it turned around and sort of glided away ..."

               "It was horrible," admitted Neville, in a higher voice than usual. He had a round face that was often tinted red (just because he had a naturally flushed expression or because he was easily embarrassed, Nova wasn't sure), and some blond hair he kept flat on top of his head. "Did you feel how cold it got when it came in?"

               "I felt weird," said Ron, shifting his shoulders uncomfortably. "Like I'd never be cheerful again ..."

               Ginny Weasley (Ron's younger sister) was huddled in her corner looking nearly as bad as Nova felt, and she gave a small sob; Hermione went over and put a comforting arm around her. Both of the Weasleys looked like the rest of their family — flaming red hair, a freckled complexion with light skin, and light eyes. From what Nova could see, Ron had blue eyes while Ginny's looked more like a caramel brown color.

               "But didn't any of you — fall off your seats?" said Harry awkwardly.

               "No," said Ron, looking anxiously at his friend. "Ginny was shaking like mad, though ..."

               "Well ..." Justin looked at Nova, who was nibbling on her piece of chocolate silently. "Nova fainted, but she didn't fall out of her seat. She tripped."

               "Oh." Nova rolled her eyes. "Tell the whole world, then — how I tripped and fell and a dementor tried to reap my soul —"

               Before she could say anything more, Ernie shoved the rest of the chocolate into her mouth. She started coughing, trying to eat the chocolate instead of choking on it. She glared at Ernie angrily. She felt bad enough already (although the chocolate was helping; it was spreading a warm feeling throughout her body); feeling weak and shivery, like she was recovering from a bout of flu.

               Professor Lupin had come back. He paused as he entered, looked around, and said with a small smile, "I haven't poisoned the chocolate, you know ..."

               "We'll be at Hogwarts in ten minutes," continued Professor Lupin. "Are you all right, Harry?"

               "Fine," the Gryffindor muttered, looking embarrassed. Harry had a tall nose with wire glasses that hung off loosely. He was skinny and tall, looking as if his limbs were impossibly far too long for his body. He had unruly black hair, and emerald green eyes that stood out against his other features.

               Lupin looked at Nova, who was trying to cough as quietly as she could. Noticing how her face had reddened, he asked, "Are you alright?"

               "She's fine," Ernie answered for her. He didn't even have the slightest bit of guilt on his face.

✴

The four Hufflepuffs made their way back to their original compartment. Professor Lupin seemed a bit hesitant to let them roam the train, but perhaps he didn't want to hear Nova complain anymore about leaving her owl all alone.

               Lyrid seemed to still be spooked (and a bit mad that Nova had left him alone to fend for himself in the compartment), and so did Hannah's cat, Oncilla. By the time Nova and Hannah got their pets to calm down, the train had stopped at Hogsmeade Station. There was a great scramble to get outside; owls hooted, cats meowed, and a toad croaked loudly somewhere nearby. It was freezing on the tiny platform; rain was driving down in icy sheets.

               "Firs' years this way!" called a familiar voice.

               Nova turned and saw the gigantic outline of Hagrid, a man far taller than the average. He was the groundskeeper for Hogwarts, and helped the first years take the traditional journey across the lake. He was beckoning the terrified-looking first years to follow him.

               Nova followed the rest of the school along the platform and out onto a rough mud track, where at least a hundred stagecoaches awaited the remaining students. The stagecoaches were pulled, but only Nova was guessing this, by invisible horses. When she, Ernie, Hannah, and Justin climbed inside and shut the door, the coach set off all by itself, bumping and swaying in procession.

               The coach smelled faintly of mold and straw. Nova's brain still felt muddied, but she no longer felt feverish. She felt better, but she couldn't have looked too great as her friends kept looking over worriedly every minute or so.

               As the carriage trundled toward a pair of magnificent wrought iron gates, flanked with stone columns topped with winged boars, Nova saw two more towering, hooded dementors, standing guard on either side. A wave of cold sickness threatened to engulf her again; she leaned back into the lumpy seat and closed her eyes until they had passed the gates. The carriage picked up speed on the long, sloping drive up to the castle; Justin was leaning out of the tiny window, watching the many turrets and towers draw nearer. She would've been too if she wasn't so scared to see another dementor. At last, the carriage swayed to a halt, and the four got out.

               They joined the crowds swarming up the steps, through the giant oak front doors, into the cavernous entrance hall (which was lit with flaming torches) and housed a magnificent marble staircase that led to the upper floors.

               The door into the Great Hall stood open at the right; Nova followed the crowd toward it, but had barely glimpsed the enchanted ceiling, which was black and cloudy tonight, when a voice called, "Potter! Holloway! I want to see you both!"

               Nova flinched at the volume, not expecting it. She turned around to find Professor McGonagall, Transfiguration teacher and head of Gryffindor House, calling over the heads of the crowd. She was a stern-looking witch who wore her hair in a tight bun; her sharp eyes were framed with square spectacles. Nova fought her way through to crowd to the professor with a heavy feeling of foreboding: Professor McGonagall just had this way of making her feel she must have broken the worst Hogwarts rule possible.

               "There's no need to look so worried — I just want a word in my office," she told Nova and Harry, who were pushing their way out of the crowd. "Move along there, Weasley, Granger. Macmillan, there is no need to give me such a look."

               Harry's friends stared as Professor McGonagall ushered him and Nova away from the chattering crowd; the two accompanied the professor across the entrance hall, up the marble staircase, and along a corridor.

               Once they were in her office — a small room with a large, welcoming fire — Professor McGonagall motioned Harry and Nova to sit down. She settled herself behind her desk and said abruptly, "Professor Lupin sent an owl ahead to say that you two were taken ill on the train, Potter, Holloway."

               Before either student could reply, there was a soft knock on the door, and Madam Pomfrey, the Hogwarts nurse, came bustling in. Nova tried her best to cover a sour face; it was bad enough that she had passed out, but it wasn't that big of a deal. Everyone was making such a big deal when she was just clumsy and absent-minded.

               "I'm fine," Nova and Harry said at the same time.

               "I don't need anything," Harry tacked on.

               "Oh, it's you, is it, Potter?" said Madam Pomfrey, ignoring this and bending down to stare closely at him. "I suppose you've been doing something dangerous again?"

               Then the nurse turned to Nova. "Miss Holloway," she said, sounding not-so-surprised to see her, "fall down a flight of stairs again?"

               The girl's face flushed pink. "It was the moving staircases, Madam Pomfrey! They did it on purpose, I swear!"

               "I seem to recall you told me the same thing a couple of times before," said Madam Pomfrey. "How many times can you blame the stairs, Miss Holloway?"

               "Well ... once or twice, it was Ernie's fault," said Nova, looking aside. "He pushed me down."

               Professor McGonagall pursed her lips at the student. She turned to Madam Pomfrey to say, "It was a dementor, Poppy."

               She and the healer exchanged a dark look, and Madam Pomfrey clucked disapprovingly. "Setting dementors around a school," she muttered, pushing back Harry's hair and feeling his forehead. "They won't be the last one who collapses. Yes, he's all clammy." Madam Pomfrey moved to feel Nova's forehead next, pushing back her bangs; when she was done, Nova hurried to fix the hair. "And so is she. Terrible things, dementors are, and the effect they have on people who are already delicate."

               "I'm not delicate!" said Harry crossly.

               "Of course you're not," said Madam Pomfrey absentmindedly, now checking Harry's pulse.

               "What do they need?" said Professor McGonagall crisply. "Bed rest? Should they perhaps spend tonight in the hospital wing?"

               "I'm fine!" said Harry, jumping up.

               Nova eyed the boy. She didn't want to stay in the wing, she'll admit, but Harry was being dramatic about it all. Madam Promfrey grabbed Nova's wrist, checking her pulse. Then the woman moved on to trying to peer into the Hufflepuff's eyes.

               "Well, they should have some chocolate, at the very least," said Madam Pomfrey, who was now trying to peer into Harry's eyes next.

               "We've already had some," Nova informed Madam Promfrey. "That Lupin guy gave us some. Professor Lupin, right?"

               "Did he, now?" said Madam Pomfrey approvingly. "So we've finally got a Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher who knows his remedies?"

               "Are you sure you feel all right, you two?" Professor McGonagall said sharply.

               "Yes," said Harry at once.

               "Very well. Potter go fetch Miss Granger for me. I need to have a quick word with her about her course schedule. Miss Holloway, you're free to go to the Great Hall for the feast."

               Harry nodded and left, Madam Promfrey leaving soon after. However, Nova stayed seated in front of the Transfiguration teacher.

               "Miss Holloway," Professor McGonagall said, "do you have anything you need to tell me?"

               "The letter," the black-haired girl started abruptly. "You were the one to give it to me. Why?"

               "I'm afraid I don't know what letter you're talking about," admitted the teacher.

               Nova leaned forward in her seat, not liking this answer. "The letter from my mum. My biological mum, I mean. You gave it to me on my eleventh birthday, when you came and explained I was accepted to Hogwarts."

               Professor McGonagall raised her eyebrows, nodding slowly, mainly to herself. "I remember, now," she said. "You asked why I gave it to you? I was told that's what your mother wanted. She wanted it to be given to you on your eleventh birthday."

               Nova had known her mother had been a student at Hogwarts. However, that was all she knew. She had no idea what House, what years she went, and certainly not her name.

               "So you know who my mum is?" asked Nova.

               "If I recall correctly, you asked me that before, Miss Holloway," remembered McGonagall. "When I gave you that letter, you asked and I answered truthfully: No, I don't know."

               "Maybe I was hoping you had remembered something," admitted Nova plainly. "It's nearly been three years since then."

               Professor McGonagall placed her hands out in front of her on her desk, and interlocked her fingers. "I think we have a misunderstanding, Nova. You seem to think that I had held onto that letter since it had been written, but that's not true. I was given the letter the morning before I arrived at your house. I was told to give it to you. I was simply following orders."

               Nova's eyebrows furrowed. "Who gave you the letter?" she asked immediately.

               Professor McGonagall smiled. "I also recall the Sorting Hat debated for a couple of minutes on what House to put you in, Miss Holloway. The Hat debated between Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff, if I'm correct, because you never stopped looking for answers and for your loyalty."

               "So, you're not gonna tell me?" Nova asked, pursing her lips.

               "I'm saying look at all the angles," said the professor. "It'll be a more fulfilling conclusion if you do."

               "Look at all the angles ..." Nova muttered to herself, standing up. She didn't want to show just how bothered she was. She had been looking at all the angles, but all the angles led to dead ends.

✴

Nova had missed the sorting. Not that she was particularly upset about that—it took forever and she was always starving. She slipped into the sea of Hufflepuffs, sitting at the end of the table, where a fourth-year (she was pretty sure his name was Dylan) scooted over for her. Nove peered around the fourth year, looking for the new faces who had joined for their first years. Nova saw her friends, Hannah, Ernie, and Justin closer to the middle of the table.

               Professor Dumbledore (Hogwarts' headmaster) stood up to speak and the talking in the Hall ceased. Professor Dumbledore, though very old, always gave an impression of great energy. He had several feet of long silver hair and beard, half-moon spectacles, and an extremely crooked nose. He was often described as the greatest wizard of the age.

               He seemed nice enough, maybe a bit crazy at times (maybe that was just his age; he had seen so much in his long life, he turned mad), and if Nova was right, maybe a bit of a prick for keeping such an important detail from her for years. But perhaps Nova was being a bit mean, and that was certainly plausible with how betrayed she felt now.

               "Welcome!" said Dumbledore, the candlelight shimmering on his beard. "Welcome to another year at Hogwarts! I have a few things to say to you all, and as one of them is very serious, I think it best to get it out of the way before you become befuddled by our excellent feast ..."

               Dumbledore cleared his throat and continued; "As you will all be aware after their search of the Hogwarts Express, our school is presently playing host to some of the dementors of Azkaban, who are here on Ministry of Magic business."

               "They are stationed at every entrance to the grounds," the headmaster continued, "and while they are with us, I must make it plain that nobody is to leave school without permission. Dementors are not to be fooled by tricks or disguises — or even Invisibility Cloaks," he added blandly. Nova frowned, that was an odd thing to specify.

               "It is not in the nature of a dementor to understand pleading or excuses. I, therefore, warn each and every one of you to give them no reason to harm you. I look to the prefects, and our new Head Boy and Girl, to make sure that no student runs afoul of the dementors," he said.

               Dumbledore paused again; he looked very seriously around the hall, and nobody moved or made a sound. The headmaster also had a flare for the dramatics (not that Nova could judge, she took for the dramatics as well).

               "On a happier note," he continued, "I am pleased to welcome two new teachers to our ranks this year. First, Professor Lupin, who has kindly consented to fill the post of Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher."

               There was some scattered, rather unenthusiastic applause. Only those who had been in the compartment on the train with Professor Lupin clapped hard, Nova among them. Professor Lupin looked particularly shabby next to all the other teachers in their best robes. Lupin didn't look to be that promising but he had to be better than the other two Defense Against the Dark Arts professors Nova had before. Quirrel (who apparently was a host for You-Know-Who — like a parasite) and then Lockhart who was nothing but a downright fraud and criminal.

               "As to our second new appointment," Dumbledore continued as the lukewarm applause for Professor Lupin died away. "Well, I am sorry to tell you that Professor Kettleburn, our Care of Magical Creatures teacher, retired at the end of last year in order to enjoy more time with his remaining limbs. However, I am delighted to say that his place will be filled by none other than Rubeus Hagrid, who has agreed to take on this teaching job in addition to his gamekeeping duties."

               Nova's jaw dropped. She played off her shock pretty poorly, she will admit. The fourth year beside her snickered.

               "What?" the boy asked. "You got the monster book, too?"

               "Did it try to eat you, too?" Nova asked the fourth year, her eyes wide.

               The boy nodded. "It took a huge bite of my Mum's petunias. She flipped. Told me it had to be put outside."

               "Well, I think that's everything of importance," continued Dumbledore, breaking Nova's conversation with the fourth year beside her. "Let the feast begin!"

               The golden plates and goblets before them filled suddenly with food and drink. Nova had been ravenous before, but now, her stomach felt full of expectations (and slight fear) of her first day of classes.

✴   MAY 13TH, 2024 / this has been easily finished since ... january(?) but i'm just getting around to posting it 😭😭 lowkey took me so long to post it because - i'm scared? i've never written a harry potter fic until the end so i feel so out of my element. like writing for percy jackson or miraculous ladybug is so different than writing for harry potter and i'm scared, especially because some harry potter fans are so unhinged. like i genuinely do not read fics that have wolfstar or jegulus because those people scare me sometimes 😭 (see in: "sometimes" = 99% of the time)

and a little bit of formatting changes - the parentheses are bolded now instead of italicized and bolded. not a huge change or anything, but i don't know how i feel about it yet

it's interesting to see how my writing has/hasn't changed over a year or so - i feel much more comfortable using more "creative writing" than i did last year (and i partly blame that on school, where i was so used to writing more "academic" pieces). so it's interesting to see how i describe stuff now compared to last year

i'm not super happy with the way it ended but i couldn't find a better way to write the ending so we are stuck with it

anyways, opinions?? thoughts??

(not edited nor proofread)