"I'm bored Un..."

I glared at Deidara from the corner of my eye, my mouth twisting into a frown under my mask.

"Well what now dumbass?" I snapped as he winced, at least I think so.

Currently the group was sitting behind the school, keeping an eye on the school vault. Kids had been stealing from it daily now so headmaster dude sent us to protect it. We kept our little group called the Akatsuki since memories are brilliant.

The vault is a building outside the school that is protected by a really high wall, the door to the vault is a sealed door that Pein added seals to.

Me and Itachi were sitting on top of the walls keeping an eye out while Konan, Pein and Deidara patrolled the ground. Deidara was currently patrolling the ground around my wall.

"Two rouges heading this way. One has a hoodie and the other looks like an elf." Itachi called out, standing up from his wall.

I groaned and stood up aswell.

"I'll take 'em!" I shouted as the two people came towards the entrance. I jumped down and met them, eying them calmly.

"Yo. What you asswipes doin' in my domain?" I snapped as hoodie shifted. His chakra seemed familiar.

"Wanted to see the new 'Akatsuki' that was mentioned by our... friends." Hoodie told me, not lifting his head.

"Well dude. What do you wanna know about us?"

"Your chain. Food chain to be exact."

I turned to look at Pein, who nodded, then turned back. I sighed, tugging at my mask then tugging it down.

"The leader is Uchiha Pein. The right hand or deputy is Konan, Pein's girlfriend. Then there is Uchiha Itachi, our Genjustu master. Then me, Taijustu and weapon master. Last but not least is Uchiha Deidara, our little brother and bomb master. We are the Akatsuki." I explained as elf boy tilted his head.

"Genjustu? Taijustu? Bombs?" Elf boy asked. I groaned out loud and turned my palm up, letting chakra spill around it.

"Chakra. Life force. Use of mental and physical energy. Thats all I'm sayin'." Itachi cackled from his point from my explanation.

"SHUT UP WEASEL ASS!"

"COME AT ME OLD BITCH!"

Deidara groaned at us as we began channeling chakra and KI into the air.

"Hidan. Itachi. Stop." Pein snarled at us as we huffed and turned away, I turned back to the two weirdos.

"Alright scouts. Turn away and begin walking. Or I shove my fist up your asses, or will you like that?" I teased as elf boy went red. Hoodie snickered, until elf boy swatted at him.

They turned around and began walking away. I turned back and was about to jump onto the wall until elf boy said something that made me pause.

"Slenderman would love having her Jeff."

(Time-Skip: 1 week)

Headmaster dude walked over to us with a tray, from my new heaven.

"MCDONALDS!" Me and Deidara squealed as we shot over to him.

I grabbed my quater pound cheeseburger large meal with a coke and sat down, humming happily.

"Pop quiz Yeah." Deidara chirped.

"Bring it."

"How much for your me-?"

"£4.96 but when medium its £4.46."

"What is in the American delux meal?"

"Two buns, two burger patties, one strip of cheese, two strips of lettuce, a bit of mayonase and seven onions."

"My Kami your a Mcdonalds maniac." Itachi groaned as I grinned at him.

"If I'm going to be good at something, then I've got to be very good at it." I replied.

Someone snickered from my left. All of us stood up and turned to see a really tall guy with a trench coat and a hat.

"Oi. Who's tall, dark and ugly?" I asked as Deidara snickered. Hat dude froze and began growling.

"Oh my Jashin-Sama... can I have one day without some tall ass hot guy trying to kill meh!?"

"Hot?" Itachi called over to me. I shrugged.

"Gotta find people who cover up their features hot dude. Sexy leval is like hell on fire."

Konan sighed with me as we swooned.

"Alright name." Pein ordered as headmaster dude ran, taking my food with him.

"Offenderman."

...

...

...

...

"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!" Me and Deidara cackled, bending over and laughing like demons.

"O-OFFENDERMAN!" I howled, tears escaping my eyes. Deidara was no better.

Offender seemed to get a tic mark.

"Yeah thats my name! What of it!?"

"S-SEXUAL OFFENDERMAN!" Deidara yelled as I howled with laughter.

"OI STOP LAUGHING!"

"OR WHAT!? Y-You gonna.... fuck me? BWAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!"

"I'LL SHOVE A TENTECAL UP YOUR ASS IF YOU DONT STOP!"

...

...

...
"GAWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!"

"BWAAHHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHHHAHA!"

"I SAID STOP LAUGHING!"