SCRIISHHHH!

My hands find the edges of the brown cloak, ripping it at its seams. Screams of frustration halt at my throat, coming out as squeaks instead, fading into the air of my otherwise-empty dormitory. The voices of the Jedi Council members echo in my head, and I tear at the material brutally. I know it is unbecoming of me to do so, but I cannot help it as this afternoon's scene rewinds again in my mind.

"My midi-chlorian cell count is above the required level, I obey the Code, and I have not done anything wrong." I had voiced out earlier in front of the entire Jedi Council. I restrain from yelling, opting for indignant diplomacy. "I have been nothing but diligent. Please, let me see my brother."

"The Jedi have no family except for those of the order. From the moment you stepped into the Temple, Joelle Su, you have been part of this family. There should be no other, and even you do not need the Force to sense that," Master Windu replied, reclining in his seat.

I forced myself to mask the hurt and anger in my voice, my tone coming out flat. "I left on the day my brother was born. I remember, clear as crystal, Master Yoda promised me I could return one day to see him if I completed my training as a youngling." My gaze pointedly shifted to Grand Master Yoda, the tiniest creature on the Jedi Council.

"And if I remember correctly, you were wreaking havoc in the Temple, flinging objects everywhere in a fit. Grand Master Yoda only said that to pacify you." Master Saesee had waved away my point. He then looked at me with an expression of disappointment. "The Jedi are not to have any emotional attachments."

"About attachments, this is not," Master Yoda had cut in. I remember being relieved that I had at least one member of the Council on my side. After all, he was the Master who trained me, who told me to focus on becoming a Jedi so that I could finally see my brother.

"Said those words, I should not have," he adds solemnly, and I am stunned. I would have thought he would understand me, that perhaps he could empathize with my situation. "Never known. him, you have. Better that way, it is."

I had been told that appealing to the Jedi Council to visit my family would be no easy task, but this was downright disastrous. "I am sure that I am not the only one who has appealed to return to see my family," I imbued my voice with confidence, though I know none have ever succeeded. "I only need to see his face and know his name, that is all. One glimpse is all I ask for."

Master Ki-Adi tapped his foot. "The Gathering is this evening, Joelle Su. I would advise that you come to terms with your memories and prepare to search for your kyber crystal. Elsewise, you may find yourself better suited to join the Jedi Corps like the rest who did not pass to even become Padawans or excuse yourself back to your home planet."

Shocked, I opened my mouth to say something, but Master Plo interrupted me with his usual calmness. "We are doing this for the benefit of the Jedi Order, for your benefit. You will come to understand this, in time. You have a gift too precious to be thrown away, therefore I pray that you will choose to stay and continue your training. You are dismissed."

And I was left with no choice but to walk out the room.

My palms bunch up the rough material, savaging it. The sound and the destruction is satisfying, and the memory hurts a little less than before. Then the consequent thoughts kick in.

I will never know my brother, and he will never know me. If we were to even meet on the streets of Coruscant or in a starship, we would not recognise one another.

I grit my teeth and unleash my fury on the roughspun cloak, now no more than a mess of brown material. I will have to sew it back into one piece, but that is for later. Right now, all that matters is that I purge myself of this resentment.

I do not even know his name.

The notion strikes me, cold and clear. Tears well up in the corners of my eyes, turning my vision to fractured glass. I cover my face with my bare hands to muffle my sniffles. I cannot let anyone discover me freely basking in my emotions, so I do the only thing I was taught: I recite the Jedi Code, the simplified one that they've drilled into me every day since I was a youngling.

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet the Force.

The Code works to quell my waterworks, and I use the remnants of the cloak to wipe the tears away.

I should get ready. I cannot be a Jedi if I am not able to obtain a kyber crystal at the Gathering. Once I become a Jedi, only then can I find my family.

I stand up from my bed and begin to reach for the sewing kit stashed under it in order to start mending the cloak, but then I sense it. The Force tingles under my skin, vibrating through my cells, and my eyes pin in one direction.

Someone is at the door.

Nimbly, I throw down the cloak and answer the door, armed with nothing but my fists. If it is a Sith Lord or just his apprentice at my door, I'd be dead. But the Force tells me that it is not one of the dark side waiting.

A human boy stands outside, his left arm frozen in mid-knock. His pale tunic leads me to believe that he is probably also a newly-ranked Padawan, adding to the fact that he is too old to be an Initiate but still does not have his Padawan braid yet. The boy scans my face with his eyes.

I have seen him before in my group... only that I have never taken notice of him.

"Are you... alright?" He speaks Galactic Basic in a stilted, accented manner, as though it is not his first language. "I... heard something."

I force a mild smile at him. "I am fine. I only pricked my finger mending my cloak." The look on his face is incredulous, and I realize that I have either made myself to look like a weakling, or a failing liar.

I really need to spend more time with Lee-Ara.

The two of us stand face-to-face in awkward silence, one that I am very used to emanating around people. Master Yoda had noted that it was one of the ways the Force showed itself in me, and I was always proud of it.

Not in this situation, apparently.

He looks as if he is expecting me to speak, but I have nothing to say. My fingers itch to close the door in his tanned face, but that would be rude, considering that our paths may coincide again. Instead, I do the first thing I can think of.

I blink at him.

The boy's shoulders rise up in a hacking chuckle, like he has a hairball in his throat. His eyes crinkle at the edges and his dimples sink in. He now smiles at me. "You are going... for the Gathering?"

I nod. My blinking stops and I reciprocate his smile.

"I am going as well. See you later?" He begins to wave at me, walking away.

Almost reflexive, my hand raises to wave back, and the boy chuckles again. I close the door as gently as I can and trudge back towards my torn cloak.

There's not enough time to fix it. Thankfully, I know someone who has a spare or two.

Stuffing the result of my temper under my pillow, I stick my head out to make sure the boy is already out of sight before I make my way to the dormitory next to mine. One question blossoms in my mind as I open the door to Lee-Ara's dormitory.

What is his name?

A/N: The fruit of my labour is finally here in this first chapter! I tried to make this as non-Star-Wars-fan as possible, but some concepts such as the kyber crystals and Padawan braids will be further explored in the next few chapters.

Glossary:

Galactic Basic- English

I really hope you guys didn't skip anything, because each word represents one drop of my blood, sweat and tears. (GUILT TRIPPING TO THE MAX!)

Pictures of a few of the introduced Jedi Council members:

Master Windu:

Master Yoda:

Master Ki-Adi-Mundi:

Master Plo Koon:

Signing out,

- Scarlet