I should have been happy. Happy for leaving my father, happy for getting a job, happy for moving to Rouen, happy to learn what I have always wanted. But I wasn't happy.

I was unable to break away from my past, crying circling as certain images popped in front of my eyes over and over again when my father raped, beat, or shouted. Thanks to him, I lost all my confidence in people, especially men, and even my job was almost wasted. I asked myself the same thing Raphael did a few hours ago, why exactly me, since I deserved this?

- Everything is alright?- I shuddered at the sound and got a frightened look from the wonderful river of Rouen to the man of unknown voice behind me.

-I ... yes,-when I saw him, I began to tremble with my whole body. He was the same guy Jacqueline hugged and the same one who stared at the end of the session. I was afraid of him, I was afraid he would follow, and now he wants to do something really bad with me.

-You'd better come down from there,-he pointed to the edge of the bridge where I was sitting, then reached for my arm the next moment, and I instinctively pushed his hand away and jumped back a few steps. Why are you reaching out to me? - Hey hey hey, I'm sorry.

- Did you follow?- I asked softly but suddenly the question that occupied me inside.

-No, I live in the area,- he replied, and I felt him try to make eye contact with me, but to no avail.  -If you want, you can come up for a tea, I see you're cold,- he pointed to my trembling body, which didn't do it nearly because of the weather, though he couldn't know.

-Thank you, no,-I shook my head, wanting to get rid of it as soon as possible. My fears were confirmed, the guy took the first opportunity to invest, it's good that I didn't fall for this huge lie and the feigned concern.

-Okay, then I think we'll meet on Thursday,- he spread his arms and waited a few seconds for me to speak, but after I didn't, he turned loosely and walked away.

- Carm, what are you doing here? -as a result of the door opening, a bright light filled a dark, tea-scented warehouse at idle, and I got my head toward Gabriel.

-I just sat down to rest,-I came up with a completely random reason, but it didn't affect the boy.

- In the warehouse? During working hours?- he wondered, then stepped closer as his eyes widened - you cried!

-No,- I shook my head sharply, hoping the boy would believe that lie.

- What's wrong? - Well, he didn't.

-Nothing, I swear, I'm just having a bad day - like every day, I added to myself. Anyway, my answer was already true, I just couldn't smile kindly at everyone anymore, and I had to retreat a little somewhere where no one was, and for that, the warehouse was the perfect choice. -But please don't tell the boss you saw me cry.-

-I won't,- I looked up at him with a faint smile and realized he wasn't as terrible a person as I first thought. - Are you coming back to the counter, or what?

-I'm going,-I pushed myself up from the cold, dusty ground and, following the boy, returned to the coffers to have another boring, tiring day behind me.

The university finally started on the second of September, and after I was able to successfully put together an acceptable lesson schedule compatible with my work, I entered the campus photocell door with a cramping belly and was amazed at the huge, wall-painted color logo on the Universite Mont Saint Aignan caption stretched, I set off to find the presenter where my first lesson would be. Since it wasn't a big university, I was easy to find and the sight was immediately impressive. I was expecting a typical film performer, but instead I found myself facing an incredibly large gallery room full of various instruments, tools, posters, mock-ups, and an interactive whiteboard. After admiring the astronomical mock-ups, I sat up on one of the seats in the grandstand-like row of benches and waited for the professor to arrive.

- Excuse me, would you give me a pen? I whispered to the dark-blond haired girl sitting next to me when I noticed that I was not bringing any writing instruments. Looking around the room, I saw a laptop in front of everyone, but unfortunately I hadn't raised enough money to buy one of my own, so I was forced to take notes by hand.

- Sure, do you want black or blue?- she reached for his bag immediately, and I looked at him questioningly. It doesn't matter what color? The point is to catch up and be done.

-Black will be fine, thanks,- finally I swallowed a nice sentence, swallowing my criticism, and took the pen from him, but she didn't seem to want to stop talking.

-My name is Abigel, and I honestly don't know anyone here, so I hope we meet,- he smiled at me, and I fell into shock. She wants to make friends with me now? I haven't had a single friend since elementary school, and they're just superficial there too, for some reason I've always chosen the loneliness that has mostly scared people out of my environment.

-Carmelle,- I returned a pleasant smile. If she wants to make friends, so let me do it, I don't care.

- Aren't you Italian?- she glanced at me, chattering heavily on his laptop, even though the professor hadn't even gotten into it.

-Yeah I'am- I nodded.

-And what brought the wind here to Rouen?  This city isn't so famous,-she continued, and his slight pink nails made noisy noises on the plastic keyboard.

-I was looking for a quieter small town rather than a noisy one, and after a little research I found this place, plus the university looked promising,-I shrugged, pretending to have made the easiest decision of my life with this move. - it still seems so.

-Yes, it's pretty famous in the area,- Abigel looked around, where quite a few students had gathered, -but this course isn't so upbeat, I don't understand why.-

-Maybe because of its difficulty,-I replied, -and let's face it, not everyone's heart is physics, and space technology is essentially built on that.

- And where are you planning to go for an internship? she asked, flashing his white, perfect teeth as he quickly glanced at his precious watch.

-I have no idea, I honestly don't know the options - I shook my head, indicating that I hadn't even thought about that. I just moved here and wonder where I'm going next? - but I only need it next year, so I have time.

-I think soo too, but-she interrupted her sentence, for a middle-aged thin woman had entered the lecturer, surely the professor. Abigel, on the other hand, didn't want to stop talking, so she spoke again in a whisper - if you think we can continue the conversation after hours, I know a good cafe nearby.

-Today isn't good,- I shook my head, feeling nauseous as I thought about where to go after class. I will be forced to meet her again. -But I'll get to it tomorrow, for example.-

-Then tomorrow,-she smiled at me, immersed in the professor's introductory text, and I drank almost every word of the woman.

~~~

Hii guys. I want to everyone know there have this girl. I hope you know I meant of you. So she is the most georgeous, amazing and talented girl I've met, but she doesn't think it  that is true. Can I get a little help? Please write to me what do you think about this book? It means a lot. Thank you and have a nice day....