Me: Good!  My Portal Passagevay is COMPLETE!  Now to take it for a test drive!  SKREEP!

*sfx: "Risky Boots! - Shantae and the Pirate's Curse Music Extended" plays*

(A bunch of characters come out)

???: Where are--(Sees me)  HELLO, HOTTIE! (Buries my face in her mounds, ignoring the fact I have a HUGE nosebleed)

Me: 

???: Nonko, stop that!  My apologies, the name's Kogarashi.

Nonko: Why?  (sees nosebleed, squeals with delight)  SO CUTE! *hic* I'll see you some time in the future, then. (Takes a drink from her Saki bottle)

Me: (wipes blood off of my face, blushes) I already haff somevun, dear.  Plus, I don't drink liquor or smoke tobacco.  (Trips, my hands are on someone, I scream in shock)

???: Do that again, and I'll KILL YOU!  BTW, the name's Sagiri.

Me: That vas an accident, I assure you! (Sees someone floating)

???: This is a good mansion!  Who's the owner?

Me: That vould be me...Yuuna.

Yuuna: HOW DO YOU KNOW ME?!

???: You must be...Antasma, if I'm not mistaken.

Me: Yes, and you must be Oboro, correct?  SKREEHEEHEEHEEHEEHEEHEEHEEHEEHEEHEE! (Risky walks in, sees multiple characters, and deduces what happened)

Risky: You opened a portal into Yuuna's Dimension, didn't you, Antasma?

Me: Ahehehe...Yes, sweetie, but it vas only for a test from the portal machine itself.  SKREEP!

(Portal closes)

InfiniteTheEdge: Antasma, what's going on here? (Sees the group of girls) HOLY CRAP!

Comet: Dad? Why did you say tha-(Sees the group of vixens) SWEET MERCIFUL CRAP!  HOT LADIES AT 12:00 LOW!  (Arrives with a rose in his mouth, purrs)  Damn, ladies, you must have been apprentices from the Anarchy Sisters themselves, because you look like angels!  Do you want to go to the planetarium, where you belong with the OTHER "heavenly bodies"?

Me: I apologize, Kogarashi.  Ever since Comet began high school, he's been quite the Casanova...

Kogarashi: My friend back at school is the EXACT same way, I know how you feel.  Which rooms are going to be ours?

Me: Follow me.  (Walks into pink-colored bar/bedroom)  Nonko, this is your room.

Nonko: Thank you!  (Hugs me tight enough where I pass out)

*sfx: "Mystic Mansion - Sonic Heroes Music Extended" plays*

InfiniteTheEdge: Risky, carry Antasma into the recovery room.  I'll show the rest of these people their rooms.  (Approaches a couple's room) Kogarashi, Yuuna, this is your room.

Kogarashi: (Notices sign on door, freaks out) COUPLE'S ROOM?!

Yuuna: This is so cool!  Thank you, Mr. Infinite!

InfiniteTheEdge: Anytime, Yuuna! (Walks into a purple ninja room) Sagiri, this is your room!

Sagiri: Hmph!  Tell Antasma this! (gives InfiniteTheEdge the bird)

Me: THIS IS HOW YOU THANK SOMEVUN WHO OFFERED YOU A ROOM?!?

Sagiri: Yes, because despite their polite acting, all men are disgusting!

Me: Don't just judge a book by its cover!  It's not honorable!  You possibly need a lesson from my other prosecution friend.

*sfx: "Simon Blackquill ~ Twisted Samurai - Phoenix Wright Ace Attorney: Dual Destinies Music Extended" plays*

Simon Blackquill: You called, Bat King-dono?  (notices Sagiri) Ah, this must be Sagiri.  Hello there, my name is Simon Blackquill.  I will tell you about the men in this mansion.

(The next day...)

Sagiri: Hello, Kogarashi.

Kogarashi: Why are you being friendly?

Blackquill: You can thank ME for that!

Kogarashi: You are Simon Blackquill, correct?  And your pet peregrine falcon is...Taka...?

Taka: (chirps curiously, flies over to Kogarashi)

Blackquill: Taka takes a fancy to anyone who guesses my name correctly, lucky guess or research.

Me: (sees Nonko in my bed)  AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!

Nonko: Good morning, Antasma.  (smiles)

Yuuna: Oh, dear!

Viger: Antasma will see you next time, and as always, toodles!