warnings: gore

The next time he wakes up, he's on his own bed, and for a moment he wonders whether he had been dreaming.

It's ... a dream.

Sighing in relief, Baekhyun slips out of bed and decides to wash his face, to clear away the nightmare that had haunted his mind.

Approaching the sink, he splashes his face, and finds that his long sleeves are getting in the way. Switching off the tap, he hastily rolls up his sleeves, and feels a dull pain on his arm from the pressure of his fingers. As he picks up his toothbrush, toothpaste, and the cup he always uses when brushing his teeth, he peers through the droplets of water dripping down his hair and face at the mirror, and his eyes widen.

Two bruises litter on both of Baekhyun's forearms, in the shape of a hand that had seemed as if it had gripped around his skin tightly.

Everything falls from his hands and clatters to the floor, and he steps back, almost falling down in shock. Now all his memories fall back inside his head, with the young boy touching him, gripping him desperately, his dark eyes full of so much fear and his beautiful rainbow hair gripped by a masked man so violently.

It's real.

As if on cue, someone's voice fills up his entire room, coming from the speakers installed on his ceiling as someone makes an announcement throughout the entire building.

"Sorry for the inconvenience caused yesterday. The EX'ACT Laboratory, as well as the rest of SQUAOII, is once again in safe hands. Due to this sudden situation, we are now delaying the trainee observations in experiments until further notice. As you may have already heard, there has been a Monster that had been lurking around in SQUAOII, and as our duty to protect our citizens, we have searched for this Monster after receiving reports ... and he is now successfully captured."

With that, Baekhyun's surroundings suddenly erupt – in cheers. Even though Baekhyun is alone in his own room, he can hear cheers from beyond his thick walls, so loud and ecstatic that it defeats the soundproof walls.

"Monsters are dangerous to our society. We must continue to work, in order to protect those dear to us." The speakers crackle and then there is no more noise.

Breathing slowly, Baekhyun closes his eyes.

He's not dangerous. He's just a boy. He thinks to himself, feeling the droplets from his face drip down to his shirt. He won't harm anyone.

Baekhyun wants to help the boy, to tell him it's all right, or to at least convince the Experimenters to leave him be until he's older, or ... or to help him escape.

Yet here he is, sitting down on the floors of his bathroom, terrified until he's unable to move.

Noises sound in his bedroom, and eventually the door opens. Baekhyun doesn't care to see who it is that's picking him off the floor, who it is that's pulling him out of his bathroom and into his bedroom.

Then he's blinking and a familiar face comes into focus. Although his professor's handsome face is so close to his, instead of feeling fluttery and embarrassed like he usually would, this time he can only stare blankly back, as if his feelings are detached from his physical self.

His professor doesn't say a word, instead his concerned expression in the full front as he slowly wipes away the droplets from Baekhyun's face with his warm hands. Baekhyun wants to cry for the boy, but he doesn't, because he's frozen.

"I know your heart is soft, little one." Chanyeol's voice comes so gently, as if he's forgiving Baekhyun for being different. "But you have to be ruthless, especially towards people who can't be forgiven."

Baekhyun wants to nod, he wants to say yes, he'll try harder to be stronger, but his throat is dry and his heart reluctant.

"I can't." He whispers. "I'm not like everyone else. I know they're evil, I know they deserve it, but I can't bring myself to hate them. I can't stand it when someone is suffering, no matter how much they deserve it, I can't stand it."

"Just like you're scared of blood, Professor ..." Baekhyun continues. "You can't help it. It's not your fault. That's me, too."

"Baekhyun, you have to change." His professor urges. "Otherwise ... you're not fit for this role." But Baekhyun's not listening, not anymore. Instead, he turns his head away and out of his professor's grasp, hating the fact that those fingers leave a trace of warmth where it had touched his skin, leaving his heart skipping a beat.

"Sorry, Professor." He whispers, stepping away from Chanyeol, who seems so distant from him, because he's so different. Instead, he stares down at the ground, because at least the ground doesn't seem to hate Monsters. "You must be disappointed."

Before his professor can reply, however, the door closes. Baekhyun doesn't even bother to turn and see who it is, and instead continues staring at the ground, at the distance that separates him from Chanyeol.

At this moment, part of him wants and desires Chanyeol's touch, craves to have the older cheer him up, but the other part of him knows he'll just push him away again.

Maybe the older understands that too, because Baekhyun sees, in his line of vision, the older walk away. The footsteps stop and whispering ensues, and then they sound again. The door opens and closes once more.

Baekhyun clutches his head and closes his eyes, heart racing not because of the presence of Chanyeol, but because he had the heart and the guts to say such a thing towards the older.

"I don't hate them." A voice sounds, and Baekhyun opens his eyes, suddenly remembering that there is someone else in the room. Of course, it's none other than Zhang Yixing – really, he's always seeing the two of them everywhere so often he's not surprised anymore.

However, those words do surprise him, especially coming from this man.

"You don't have to hate them." Yixing says. "Your professor had a hard time. Maybe if you had directly faced the war, you would understand why there is so much hatred."

"You had directly faced the war, haven't you?" Baekhyun whispers.

"Maybe you'll realise, in time, that being different from others isn't such an uncommon thing." With that, Yixing too, leaves his room and leaves him alone.

After a week of silence, no testing, no observing, and no experimenting, Baekhyun is pulled with the other trainees once again back into the meeting room.

"There is a change of plans." The man in front of them announces. "Due to the incident that happened last week, there have been interruptions to our schedule. Thus, we shall now proceed to Experimenting straight away, and disregard our plans of allowing you to observe for the remaining two weeks. Now, each of you will be assigned to one Experiment, and we shall give you a report that you have to follow. This is part of the testing to qualify you for the final round, therefore you must all take this seriously. Now each of you will be assigned to a room, and there you shall wait for further instructions."

Baekhyun is assigned to room EX19, and when he finds it, he notices a piece of paper stuck onto the door.

"Task One: examine the Experiment to determine whether it is suitable to be experimented."

Still feeling stiff, Baekhyun takes a deep breath and pushes open the door. But he freezes when he who's on the other side, tied to the bed by chains on his wrists and ankles, rainbow hair splayed down along the hard bed.

It's the boy from last week.

Baekhyun is unable to breathe as he stares down at the boy's beautiful features – yes, he truly is beautiful, and Baekhyun will never be able to unsee that. His skin is smooth and flawless, and Baekhyun can't imagine that one day it'll only be littered with scars just like it had adorned the skin of every other Experiment.

Then those eyes are opening, and the boy's gaze falls on him. Baekhyun's breath is taken away.

I'm supposed to examine him... Baekhyun thinks to himself as he clutches the clipboard tightly in his hands. The boy's face is expressionless as he twists his head to stare at the sky.

"So ... you're going to cut me up now?" He asks emotionlessly. "If I knew, I wouldn't have begged you. At least I'll save some pride."

Baekhyun's heart breaks, and he stays frozen. He hates the way the boy is tied up, looking so small and oppressed unlike the him from last week that looked afraid but at least wild and free. He stands there for a long time, contemplating, but in the end, his true self takes over and he immediately kneels down in front of the bed, trying to unlock the chains.

The boy's hand feels soft beneath his gloves, and even if he suspects there might be surveillance cameras around, he doesn't care. He just wants the boy to be free.

Maybe he's being reckless, not considering how the boy is apparently stronger than he is, and how he might be slammed down if the boy were to be free. Maybe even if that happened, he wouldn't care.

After he frees the boy's arms, the boy sits up as he removes the chains off his ankles.

"Are you going to let me escape?" The boy asks, and even though it seems as if he's trying not to expect much, his tone is still hopeful.

"You'll probably never be able to." Baekhyun replies softly. "But I want you to be free, at least in this area, as long as you're with me." The boy looks so young, now that Baekhyun thinks about it as he steps back and allows the boy his own space. It's horrifying, how the moment they capture him they decide to put him in to be experimented.

"You're not scared I'll hurt you?" The rainbow-haired Monster tilts his head, blinking curiously.

"If you do, I deserve it." Baekhyun smiles. "On behalf of everyone here."

When the boy stands, Baekhyun realizes the boy's taller than him.

"Don't worry." Baekhyun continues. "I'm sure now that you're my Experiment, they won't let other people touch you. You'll be fine, at least for the next few weeks."

"So you are going to cut me up ..." The boy mutters, sounding a little scared now, and Baekhyun's heart deflates. Immediately, guilt crawls up into his heart like spiders.

"Do you want to sit back down on the bed, so I can examine you?" He asks quietly, needing the boy to do as he asks but not wanting to manhandle him.

"Examine me?" The boy mutters. "So what, so you can see if I'm healthy and good enough to be cut up?"

"..." Baekhyun clutches his clipboard again and stands in place, biting his lip and not knowing what to do.

The boy does listen though, as he scoffs and returns to the bed. Baekhyun immediately moves forward, placing the clipboard down on the table right next to the bed, gloved hands reaching out to grab the Monster. Just as he's about to touch the younger, though, Baekhyun stops himself.

"Do you mind if I touch you?" He asks politely as he stands there awkwardly. The rainbow-haired boy stares at him, blinks for a few seconds, then pushes his arm towards Baekhyun's hands.

"Better you touch me than anyone else." He mutters. Baekhyun swallows down his saliva and guilt, and then proceeds to check him, with touches and questions and X-rays and needles if need be.

"Tell me if it hurts." Baekhyun whispers every time before he conducts a new test, as if doing the examination painlessly will somehow be able to make up for the torture later.

"How old are you?" The boy asks in the middle of his testing. "Pretty sure they only accept like 50 year-olds or something ... You don't look much older than me."

"I'm twenty-three." Baekhyun replies as he writes notes on his clipboard.

"I swear you look eighteen." The Experiment replies, sounding a little shocked.

"Yeah, I get that a lot." Baekhyun sets down his clipboard and smiles softly at the younger. "I'm done with your checkups."

The boy grunts as he slips off the bed.

"Are you hungry?" Baekhyun looks at the time – they still have some time left.

"Yeah." The rainbow-haired boy stands straight. "I eat a lot though. I should've realized ages ago that it wasn't normal ..."

"How much? I'll buy them for you." Baekhyun, too, straightens his back.

"I can eat 20 to 25 burgers a meal." The boy rants, and Baekhyun blinks in surprise, because the boy eats way more than him, more than double!

"Right you are." Baekhyun replies hesitantly. "Stay put." Then he takes off his glove and opens the door.

Two guards stand on either side of the door, making him flinch. They glance at him, then turn away again. Baekhyun hurries down and buys twenty burgers, then carries the bags up. As he approaches his door, the guards stop him, peering down at the bags he's holding.

"No food allowed."

"I know." Baekhyun says hastily, heart racing. "But you know this is ... the Experiment that was caught just last week, right?"

The guards turn to look at each other.

"He's a special case, the higher ups said." Baekhyun lies, feeling as if his heart is about to explode. "Trust me, this will aid in my research."

They turn to stare at him, and in that one minute that their eyes meet his, Baekhyun feels himself breaking little by little.

But just as he's about to break, they step aside and allow him entrance.

Baekhyun breaks in and closes the door behind him, sighing in relief. The rainbow-haired boy blinks at him in surprise, watching as he brings over the bags and places it on the bed.

"Were these for free? Where'd you get them from?" The boy hovers around him like a curious cat.

"No, I paid for them." Baekhyun sets down the bags and takes out a burger, then passes it to the Monster.

"..." The boy stalls for a moment, blinking down at the burger. Then he retreats backwards and sits down on the bed again. During this silence, Baekhyun has the time to wonder why he had risked his dream, his career, possibly his life, to feed a Monster that had torn apart peace that he had always wished for.

Is it because of the guilt that's swallowing him up at the thought of eventually hurting this young, poor innocent boy before him?

Is this desire to compensate for his future actions really worth it?

"Kindness is a trap." The boy's voice breaks him out of his thoughts and he looks up. The boy is looking away now, as if he's suddenly not interested in eating. "Lure me in, then break me thoroughly."

Baekhyun wants to say something, but his throat goes dry.

The boy looks away, and silence traps the both of them.

"If you're worried about whether this is poisoned, I'll eat one." Baekhyun suggests eventually as he plays around with the burger in his hand, then opens the packet. Maybe hunger is really an instinct, because eventually the rainbow-haired boy turns around and stares as Baekhyun takes one bite after another, and then another.

Attempting to reassure the younger, Baekhyun smiles and holds out the half-eaten burger. The boy stares at him, the fear of trusting evident in his eyes, but eventually he takes it and takes a careful bite.

"Delicious, huh?" Baekhyun brings the other bags over and sets it by his bedside. The boy is wolfing down the food, as if he hasn't had a proper meal ever since he had been captured. "But you don't have much time to eat before our time together is over, so eat up."

As the boy eats, Baekhyun walks over to the far end and stays there, not wanting to seem threatening to the boy. He almost smiles at how youthful the boy looks, just like any boy in his neighborhood. And that very well might have been the case with this particular rainbow-haired boy, who most likely lived in here his whole life.

After all, if Baekhyun remembers what he had learned about Monsters, they are born with black hair and dark brown eyes. Then once they turn of age, their hair colour and eye colour will naturally change. This boy is young, and probably born after the war, yet curiously that means his parents had somehow managed to enter SQUAOII along with the other Lucky Ones, and have successfully hidden their identities for such a long time ...

That means there may be Monsters living among SQUAOII.

The thought itself ... is a little scary.

The boy finishes the food very soon, and Baekhyun quickly packs up the bags. Then he holds up the cuffs apologetically until the boy sighs and lies on the bed, letting Baekhyun restrain him once more.

"See you next time." Baekhyun says softly, and turns away before he can see the boy's expression. He's afraid of that look of dread that will pass through the Experiment's face. Then he opens the door and hurries out, then passes on his report to one of his superiors.

"If your report is all correct, and your Experiment results are normal, you can begin experimenting the next day."

"Th-That quickly?'' Baekhyun blurts before he can help himself.

"Yes." The man replies emotionlessly. "Now you should go to your trainer." With that, Baekhyun bows and quickly leaves.

Time to face Professor Chanyeol ... He thinks to himself, already feeling guilty for his actions. What is he going to think of me if he finds out?

Opening the door to room 530, Baekhyun slips in, and sighs in relief when he sees his professor once again concentrated over his own work. He decides that doing a bit of reading will help get his mind off things, and for a moment he's immersed.

But soon enough, there's this feeling that's leaving him restless, as if someone's watching him. Feeling very uncomfortable, Baekhyun looks up, and flinches when he finds his professor kneeling in front of his desk, watching him quietly with his face resting in his hand.

"So how was Experimenting today?" Chanyeol asks, eyes sparkling eagerly. "Did you learn something?"

"Oh ... Mm." Baekhyun replies, attempting to hide his guilt with nonchalance. He thinks that maybe Chanyeol will let him off and leave him alone, but somehow the older sticks around, as if he really doesn't have anything else to do.

"What did you do?"

"Um ..." Baekhyun's eyes dart around his page but it's no use – he can't concentrate anymore. "Great."

"Hm?" The older chuckles, and Baekhyun can hear footsteps move around the table until his professor is next to him. "You didn't answer my question."

"W-What was your question?"

"What did you do?"

"E-Examined." Baekhyun mumbles vaguely, knowing he'll feel even guiltier if he lied specifically.

"Was it fun?"

"Mm."

"Then why don't you seem excited?" Blinking, Baekhyun looks up at his professor, alarmed.

"..." Baekhyun wants to respond, but his throat is dry. Just like that, his professor has caught him, and the truth that he had not only uncuffed the Monster, but had the nerve to buy him twenty burgers, almost spills out of him.

"That's fine, if you're not excited." Chanyeol grins at him reassuringly. "No need to look so alarmed. You look as if you're a deer caught in the headlights!"

"Haha ..." Baekhyun bites his lip and bends his head down, scribbling down on his book and writing the exact same lines from the book he's reading.

"Did something happen? You seem a little strange today." The concerned tone is back, and once again Chanyeol won't leave his personal space.

"I'm fine." Baekhyun whispers, feeling more guilt pile up his heart the more concerned his professor seems. I hope one day you'll understand why I did what I did. And maybe you'll forgive my actions.

"You have another experiment tomorrow, don't you?" His professor is very talkative today.

"Yes."

"You'll do well, won't you?" The confident and proud smile pastes onto Chanyeol's face, and Baekhyun's heart sinks because he knows he's going to disappoint.

But he summons up a smile and nods anyway.

The next day, Baekhyun returns to room EX19, finding the boy once again tied up to the bed. The first thing he does is uncuff the Experiment once again, watching the boy sit up and rub his reddened wrists. Baekhyun stares down at the report in his hand, biting his lip.

His report is the experiment he has to conduct today, which is, in a shortened and simpler summary, to remove a square piece of meat on the Experiment's arm, place a piece of stone inside a plastic container that is compatible with skin and muscles, to see how much weight the Monster's bones can withhold.

Staring at the stone in a box on the trolley of equipment, Baekhyun swallows and picks it up. He almost drops it because it's much heavier than it looks. And the report says the stone will automatically gain weight overtime, to see just how much the Experiments can take.

The stone will break his bones.

Baekhyun thinks to himself as he turns to glance at the boy whose large eyes are blinking as he stares at the ceiling.

He's just a boy. His bones are still developing.

But if I don't experiment on him, I'll be disqualified. The fear that piles up in Baekhyun's heart is terrifying, and indescribable. But if I experiment on him ... I'll feel guilty forever.

Is it worth it, climbing to the top at the expense of others?

"What are you doing?" The boy asks.

"N-Nothing." Baekhyun quickly arranges the papers properly and throws his arms at the side, shaking his head violently. The boy narrows his eyes, looking a little confused.

"Are you experimenting on me today?" He asks, voice full of innocence and an ounce of dread. No, he can't hurt this boy. He's only a child.

Baekhyun takes a deep, shaky breath, and shakes his head.

"I-I'll be ... b-back." Baekhyun stutters, then opens the door and runs out.

He finds one of his superiors standing there, waiting for all the trainees to finish. Hesitating for a while, Baekhyun stays frozen in his spot, but in the end he decides to just do it – to just lie.

"Sir." He pants once he approaches the Experimenter, watching as he turns his head to stare at Baekhyun emotionlessly. "I realized that I have forgotten a very specific bone checkup and I believe it will greatly skew my results if I do not examine the b – the Experiment deeply."

The man stares at him without replying, and Baekhyun's heart races. What if this man has seen through him, and will call him a traitor, then kick him out of EX'ACT, possibly SQUAOII?

"The surveillance camera in your room states that you have un-cuffed your Experiment, and have let him roam around, even letting him eat the food of Lucky Ones?"

"..." Baekhyun's throat goes dry, and he's so nervous he's quivering. However, there's a part of him, the stronger, persistent, ambitious part, is telling him to keep lying.

"I believed the results would be more accurate if I could attempt to create a relaxing environment for the Experiment, to ensure that all tests are performed without the influence of fear, anxiety, and dread. I also believe that if the Experiment develops trust on the Experimenter, the experiment will be carried out more smoothly. These are little risks I am taking, to ensure the best possible results for myself, and EX'ACT Laboratory." Hoping he doesn't sound as if he's just bullshitted the whole thing, Baekhyun bows lowly, using that time to scrunch up his face in panic. When he lifts up his upper body again, he says: "I hope you understand my decisions, and continue to support them as I attempt to experiment with new techniques to hopefully create new methods of experimenting on Monsters."

The man stares at him for so long that once again, he almost breaks.

But just before he breaks, the man nods.

"You can examine your Experiment again, however note that you have very limited amount of time." The man says, and Baekhyun bows deeply in relief, then runs back to Room 19.

The boy stares at him curiously. "What?"

"Nothing." Baekhyun almost smiles, but he can't because the nerves are breaking down his system. Instead, he sets his report down on one side and picks up the tools for bone experimenting. "I just realized I have to examine you more."

"Huh?" The Monster groans. "Not again."

"Shh." Baekhyun does smile this time – he can worry about experimenting later, he'll just examine the boy for today. "Now just tell me if it hurts."

"Oh." Something passes over the rainbow-haired boy's face.

"Hm?" Baekhyun looks up, gently eyeing the younger, who shakes his head and remains quiet. For the rest of his examination period, Baekhyun successfully finishes, and once again the report comes out normal, as he had expected, of course.

And of course, this stresses him out more than it should, until he's unable to study and unable to sleep.

Today is the day.

The rainbow-haired boy came out with normal results for his bones (results cross-examined with the highly experienced Experimenters), with a strength capacity slightly stronger than the average Monster, as Baekhyun had dreaded as he examined. Now there is no way Baekhyun can get the poor boy out of this experiment, and even if he made more excuses, he's sure they'll just feel suspicious of him.

There is ... really no way.

He knows this result should be the ultimate excuse to carry out the experiment without feeling guilty, because after all, results say that the boy will be able to handle it, yet, this horrible gnawing feeling of guilt continues to eat up at him, until he's not sure anymore whether he should do it or not.

I'll just do it. He thinks to himself. Just do it.

Summoning up his courage, Baekhyun takes a deep breath and heads over to Experiment Room 19, grabbing the report that had been given to him yesterday as he walks inside towards the boy who is once again cuffed up to the bed.

"Are you going to experiment on me today?" The boy asks eventually, after a long silence as Baekhyun had stood frozen with no intention of uncuffing the boy, like he had done the past two days.

Baekhyun bites his lip, mind turning and turning to find an answer that won't scare the boy, yet not wanting to lie about this. Maybe the silence is horrifying, because the boy's expression changes.

"Are you going to experiment on me today?" He repeats, in such a firm and stable way that Baekhyun flinches.

"...Yes." He replies softly, eventually, guiltily. "I'm sorry."

The boy's eyes are wide and his entire body stiffens. Baekhyun decides not to watch anymore as he quickly brings his trolley of things over right next to his chair as he sits down in front of the arm that he's going to perform on. As he brings the knife and presses it against the boy's flawless skin, Baekhyun can't help but glance over at the boy again.

"...It's okay." The boy says eventually, and even though he tries to appear unafraid, his expression and the stiffness of his body says otherwise.

That does it. Baekhyun sets down the knife and roles up the sleeves of his left arm, shifting his position. Then he hastily pushes his left hand and wrist under the boy's bound arm until their arms make a cross, Baekhyun's palm facing the ceiling, flawless skin exposed.

"Press it down." Baekhyun whispers, feeling a strange tingle (of fear?) all over his body, and before the boy can reply, and before he can change his mind, he quickly picks up the knife and digs it into his own skin.

The boy shouts something, but Baekhyun can't hear, at least at this point in time. All he can see is fresh blood pooling out, and seeing the red makes him feel dizzy. Still, despite this strange disturbance, Baekhyun keeps a clear head as he uses one hand to tie off his arteries so he will stop bleeding– after all, he's not first place for nothing.

After the blood stops flowing, Baekhyun leans back a little and pants, staring at his open would. Then he grits his teeth and digs again, three more times, until there is a clearly defined square on his forearm. And it hurts, because after all, he hadn't given himself any painkillers or nerve-blockers to stop his brain from receiving those signals. Really, it hurts more than anything he's ever felt before, even during that horrible jealousy phase of watching his best friend and the man he loves together.

Yet, Baekhyun's motivation is what's keeping him going. Maybe he's stupid, but maybe if he experiences this pain, he'll be able to understand the Monsters that have been stuck here for years.

"Do it on me, it's fine." The boy cuts in through his pained mind, and he turns towards the boy, trying not to move too much – he's trying to block his arm from the security camera that he had noticed after his superior had told him about it the other day. If he did the math correctly, the security camera will interpret the scene as Baekhyun performing an experiment on the Monster.

"It's okay." Baekhyun says faintly, having the energy to pull up a smile.

"No, you don't get it." The rainbow-haired boy continues. His eyes are wide and Baekhyun can see beads of sweat sticking to the sides of his face. "I ... He told me not to tell anyone, but I want to stop you ..."

What? Baekhyun mouths, because he's too in pain to say anything else.

"Some man ... gave me a painkiller. Even though he wasn't supposed to." The boy whispers, tears in his eyes as if he can't stand seeing Baekhyun cut himself. "He said that all I needed to do was pretend to scream, pretend it really hurts – but he said it won't feel a thing."

"He gave me this yesterday too. So I'll be fine." The rainbow-haired boy says, and if Baekhyun didn't know better, he would think the boy really is hurt, from the way his bottom lip is quivering.

"Keep pretending then, that's all I ask of you." Baekhyun says weakly, and before the boy can protest, he picks up the knife again. "And also ... remember to tell me who he is, after this is done."

Before the boy can protest, Baekhyun stabs the knife into his skin, this time attempting to cut the square piece of his forearm off. This reminds him of that time when he had accidentally been sent up to the highest floor, where that piece of meat looked so like the meat on his arm that's going to come off. Baekhyun wants to vomit, but he keeps it in, attempting to keep his eyes open and attempting to keep his mind clear as he continues cutting himself off, piece by piece.

The boy is doing a good job looking pained – maybe he's pretending, maybe this is really how he reacts, Baekhyun doesn't know. All he knows is that every time the knife touches his skin, the boy would press down his arm harder as a horrified reaction, and then he would make noises that are both soft and loud. Still, after such a long, long time, Baekhyun finally completely detaches the square piece of his forearm from the rest of his body, until he can even lift it up and put it to the side. The boy makes little noises again, and tears are rolling down his cheeks, and Baekhyun's crying too because it had been so painful that his bodily reaction had caused tears to roll out of his eyes. Trying to take deep breaths, Baekhyun picks up the object given to him to place inside the Monster's body. He's so weak he struggles to hold it, and almost drops it. However, he eventually pulls through, and tries to hold the rubber container with the stone inside it with a tweezer, yet in the end he cannot seem to pick it up, so in the end he discards the tweezer and picks up the object with his fingers, and places it carefully inside him. Like a perfectly performed and well done experiment. Baekhyun feels faint now, but maybe the intensity of the pain is what's keeping him awake. He tips the detached piece of himself over until his muscles are showing, and after a glance of the placement of the stone and its container, works out on which aspects of his muscle to cut off. Then when he's done, he slips it back and slowly sews up his muscles together, then eventually his skin.

By the time he's done, he feels as if he had experienced a war – except a war within himself. Every single part of him is tired and in pain, until he feels his skin throbbing with it. Then he pulls himself together, slowly un-rolls his sleeves, and proceeds to pack up the equipment.

Yet, as he stands up, he realizes that there's one thing that's missing.

"...I'm sorry." He whispers softly to the boy that has sweat matting his forehead, eyes closed as if he had fainted. The boy opens his eyes, and even though they are half-lidded, Baekhyun can see that his eyes are red. "I realized ... I'm going to have to hurt you anyway. I'll have to sew onto your skin, to make it seem as if I've actually done the experiment."

The boy starts sobbing, and Baekhyun immediately feels guilty. His heart squeezes and suddenly that pain is sharper than the pain on the rest of his body.

Still, he's afraid that if he doesn't do it, they'll instill another stone on the boy, maybe one even heavier than the one on Baekhyun's arm right now. He holds the needle in his quivering fingers, and turns to glance at the boy once more.

"Just do it ... It doesn't ... hurt anyway ..." Even as the boy speaks those words, he's crying really hard. He's just a boy, after all. If Baekhyun was faced with anything like this when he was the boy's age, he would be so terrified that he'd rather die.

Gritting his teeth, he stills the shaking of his fingers and then digs the needle onto perfect skin. This time, the boy says nothing, and watches emotionlessly as Baekhyun stiches him up as if his skin had really separated. Even though Baekhyun feels no physical pain, somehow this hurts him more, an internal torture that he can't pull away from unless he stops his action immediately. Blood now surfaces on the skin which Baekhyun had dug the needle on, and tears fall out of the older's eyes, because he's hurting the younger. Even if the younger cannot feel it.

He's given the boy his very first scar.

In the end, he wraps the bandage over the boy's arm and stands up weakly, feeling the stone on his arm a new burden.

"Pretend that there's something that's always weighing you down." Baekhyun reminds weakly. "I know ... I hurt you, but please listen to me. I know it's dumb because it's coming from me, but ... it's for your own good."

"You need a bandage. Don't you?" The boy asks softly. Baekhyun shakes his head, carefully wiping the sweat from his face that continues to drip down from his skin.

"It is only enough for one person." Baekhyun replies, attempting to smile to comfort the younger. "And I don't want you to get caught. Please, don't get caught."

The boy nods, looking away, and even in that angle, Baekhyun watches a tear slip out of the boy's eye.

Feeling the guilt of hurting the boy weighing down on him heavier than the stone in his arm, Baekhyun gathers his report and walks out the door, unaware that every tear that the boy sheds is for him.

Walking to Room 530 while trying to seem all right is probably the hardest thing Baekhyun had done – especially since his entire body is sore and throbbing with pain. He's trying to hold up his left arm with his right, but he knows that his left hand cannot move anymore, because he had destroyed his muscle. He stumbles inside the room, his right hand holding onto the door and not to keep himself from falling. For some reason, his breathing sounds really loud in his ears, and he twists his body until he's leaning against the wall, using it to support his walking as he paces himself towards his table.

By the time he sits down, his chest is heaving up and down, and all he wants to do is lie down and close his eyes to take a rest. The world in his eyes is blurry and unfocused, and he has a headache, so with no other choice, Baekhyun really does lie his face down on the table and closes his eyes, trying to even out his breaths.

In the back of his mind, he hears the door opening and closing, and opens his eyes, pushing himself off the table with as much force as he can muster. In his clearer vision now, he can see his professor standing elegantly in the middle of the room, looking around. Then his eyes rest on Baekhyun, his eyes widen in shock, and then he rushes over.

"Professor." Baekhyun croaks, lips pulling up into a smile – or, he thinks he's smiling. He doesn't know how much of it he can show physically, but he knows inside his heart is warm and jittery and he's truly happy.

"Was the experiment horrible?" Chanyeol comes over and carefully pulls up the younger to sit on his chair, and Baekhyun automatically shifts his working fingers over the wrist of his left hand, trying not to make it look as limp as it is.

"It went great, actually." Baekhyun replies, almost chuckling, because now he doesn't feel guilty as he felt just a day ago.

"Why do you look so ..." Chanyeol's hand brushes across Baekhyun's face, and he realizes now how sticky his face is, and how wet his hair is, from sweating. "Don't force yourself, if Experimenting is not your thing."

"I want to pass." Baekhyun mumbles quietly, and the pain is making him say gibberish now. "Pass, so I can – "

"Help create peace, I know." The older sounds very impatient and frustrated now as he hastily pulls Baekhyun up.

Without hearing Baekhyun's reply, the older helps him take off his coat, and thankfully Baekhyun is wearing long sleeves so he can still hide his wounds. Still, as he sits there and watches as the older disappears inside his bathroom with his blood-stained coat, Baekhyun closes his eyes.

"Pass, so I can stay by your side." Was what he truly wanted to say to his professor then.