Spider-Man: [annoyed] What do you want, Wade?

Deadpool: Is that how you talk to your favourite friend?

Spider-Man: We're not friends.

Deadpool: *gasps*

Deadpool: [dramatically] After all the slumber parties we had?

Spider-Man, smiles: Alright, fine.

Spider-Man: [soft and lovingly] Do you want to tag along? Maybe grab burritos after.

Deadpool, heart eyes: You know me so well. Let's elope and have spider babies together ❤️❤️❤️

Spider-Man, turns away: Nevermind.

Deadpool, follows behind: Kidding kidding! Let's go and beat up bad guys!

A/N-2/6/18
No matter how much Peter told himself to avoid Deadpool, he's already attached to him and there's no escape.

At first it was 2 lines where you probably heard it before since it's not unusual for people to reuse fake quotes from other fandoms to their own. And then I thought, Peter would most likely counter that saying their not friends even though he sometimes say they are. It originally ends with Deadpool's heart struck by Peter's loving voice (and myself almost dying because how sweet it was) and the title becoming 'What he needs is an AED' but I took Deadpool personality to account and change it in the end. This is how he will react, right?