A/N: as per my warning beforehand. Please do not read this if you haven't watched Avengers: Infinity War! I have warned you twice now!

Story Notes:
Peter is older than he was in the movie and is dating Wade. Wade was forced to stay back at Avengers Tower for the heroes' return.

{White}
[Yellow]
______________________________________________________

LET YOU DOWN.

"Mr Stark, I don't feel so good." Peter said, his eyes wide with uncontrollable pain and terror as he staggered across the uneven ground towards his mentor Tony Stark. He wrapped his arms tightly around the older male's shoulders, almost hanging from his metal covered frame. His senses felt like they were on fire, the familiar alarm bells ringing in his head, that let him know that thousands of people and himself were in terrible danger, seeing goosebumps blooming along his arms as the short hairs stood up on end under his suit. His skin scorched and tingled, telling him that his enhanced healing powers were working hard to kept him alive although it caused a lot more pain for him than usual.

"I don't understand what's happening." He sobbed, well aware that he was dying but refused to voice his own theory after all he and Mr Stark knew that's what was happening. He was barely able to hear Tony's reassurances over the ringing in his head and his own panicked cries as he clung to his mentor. "I don't want to go! I don't want to go! Please!" He begged as Tony set him down gently on the ground, still cradling the young hero tightly to him. "I'm sorry..." Peter breathed, tears slipping from his eyes and running down his cheeks as he turned into dust.

****

The mood in the spacecraft on the way back to Earth was somber and thick with loss and mourning. Tony couldn't stop staring at his hands, they were covered in him, covered in Peter. His eyes stung and his chest heaved as he tried to hold back the tears that threatened to spill and overwhelm him. Peter's death was on him, that much he knew and he would never forgive himself for it. Nebula set the spacecraft on autopilot and stepped out from the cockpit walking over to Tony and crouching down in front of him. "So, was he your son?" She asked as gently as she could, not used to having to display empathy for those in mourning.

Tony shook his head, his eyes still fixed on his hands as he cradled them close to his chest as though his guilt and sorrow for the child he couldn't save would bring Peter back, would save him from having to tell Aunt May and Wade. "No. He was just some kid who was in well over his head." He responded, his voice breaking as he fought not to cry. "I wouldn't deserve him as a son anyway. I couldn't even protect him."

****

"Stark!" Wade yelled, rushing over to the aircraft as soon as it landed in front of the Avengers Headquarters. He had been anxiously pacing, waiting for Peter's return since he had heard from the young hero that he was leaving for space with Tony Stark. The wide grin on Wade's face over seeing his baby boy again dropped, his heart plummeting deep into his stomach as he looked at the two heroes that walked over to him.
{Where's our baby boy?} White demanded.
[Do you think he's dead?]
"Shut it!" Wade snapped out loud, his boxes starting to bug him. He frowned at Tony, confused as to where Peter was.

"W-Where is he?" Wade asked, cursing the fact that his voice wavered a little, his eyes still showing a little hope that Peter would step out from the aircraft, uninjured. He frowned deeply as Tony shook his head, the other male reaching up to rest a hand on tee mercenary's shoulder. "Wade. I..." Tony started before he trailed off. "I'm so sorry."
{No!}
[No!!]
"No..." Wade echoed his boxes, turning away from Tony as he tried to get control over his emotions. "Tell me you're lying." He pleaded, rubbing a hand over his head, only just realising he wasn't wearing his mask. "Tell me this is a joke to get back at me for something."

Tony shook his head. "I wish it was." The billionaire said softly, his own guilt and emotions tearing him apart. Wade shook his head and ran towards the aircraft. "Wade!!" Tony yelled, taking off after the mercenary.
"You're lying!" Wade screeched back as he sprinted up to the door of the aircraft. He punched the button to the pressurised door and entered. "Peter's in here." He mumbled to himself as he looked around the barren cockpit. "Peter!" He yelled, tears threatening to spill down his cheeks. "Baby boy!! Tell me you're here!! Please!!"

Wade continued to yell and scream himself hoarse until his dropped to his knees, his face buried in his hands when he realised Peter wasn't going to make an appearance.
{I don't believe it!}
[That metal clad dildo! He promised to look after our baby! He stopped us from going with them to protect Petey!] Yellow yelled in anger, causing a similar emotion to bubble up in Wade as he heard Tony approach him slowly. The mercenary leapt to his feet and pulled out his guns, pointing them both at the hero with the safety off, smirking when he saw Tony's eyes widen and his movements halt with his hands raised in a placating manner as he noticed the manic, heartbroken desperation in Wade's eyes. "Wade." He said softly.

"This is your fault!" Wade snarled at Tony, his eyes flashing with dangerous rage. "He's gone because of you! You couldn't protect him, you can't protect anyone! It should have been you!" He yelled, marching forward to press the barrel of his gun against Tony's forehead. "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't spill your brains all over the ground." He hissed through gritted teeth, his finger itching to pull the trigger. Tony seemed to contemplate this for a moment before he shrugged. "Do it. You're right it is my fault. But killing me isn't going to bring him back." Tony muttered softly, his eyes brimming with his own tears of sorrow and guilt. Wade pulled the gun back, slipping it into his holster as he threw his arms around Tony and sobbed into the hero's shoulder, both united in their grief.

****

Tony glanced over his shoulder at the broken man who was sat at the bar, drowning every drink he poured himself from Tony's stock of alcohol, trying to drink away his sorrow, not that Tony didn't have his own fair share of alcohol bottles around him. He frowned, knowing the former mercenary was trying to get himself drunk enough that he'd forget or he'd poison himself although Tony knew with Wade's healing factor it would be pretty much impossible. He glanced away from the broken man which was a bad mistake as he noticed Peter's aunt looking just as broken by the news of her dead nephew as she cradled one of the suit upgrades that he had been intending to give Peter in the coming days when he had completed it to her chest, her own cheeks stained with tears.

Tony bit down on his lower lip as he stood up, moving towards his work table slowly so that he could tap the screen of a tablet. He loaded up 'Karen's' recording files and scrolled through the recordings Peter had unknowingly made of him just horsing around with his mask on. He smiled to himself as he selected them all, loading them on a loop on the large television screen, almost crying again as he saw Peter's face and childish grin. "Wade? May?" He called softly, drawing the other male's attention away from his alcohol and the woman's attention away from her grief as he pressed play and Peter's voice and laughter filled the room.

Wade stared at the screen, unable to take his eyes off Peter despite the tears that were falling down his cheeks. He didn't even know he'd stood up and walked closer to the screen until he dropped to his knees, chuckling wetly through his tears as he watched Peter laughing and joking at his own childish and dorky antics. A shared thought ran through the room as the three occupants sat in silence, feeling their own grief and their own sorrow as they looked at the boy that meant the world to all of them. 'I'm sorry that I let you down.'