"Uncle Ash! Uncle Ash! Uncle Aaaaaaash!"

"Waaake up! Waaaake up!"

"Waaaake uuuuuup!"

"Hihihihihihi!"

Ash opened his eyes slowly and turned to lie down on his back. He groaned slightly and pulled the covers up to his head. There were four kids literally jumping on his bed. This was going to be a good Saturday.

"Uncle Ash! Come ooon! You said we will go to the park today!" 

"No! He said he will play video games with me!" 

"No!"

"Yes!"

"No! He will play with me!"

"Meee! Me! Me! Me!"

"Me me me me me me me-"

"Me me me me me me me me me me me me-"

"Me me me me me me me me-"

"Me me me-"

"Me me me me me m-"

"Okay kids, time to calm the heck down." Ash suddenly sat up. He looked serious, so the three boys and the girl stopped jumping. It scared them when Uncle Ash was serious. "Go downstairs and let uncle get some sleep."

"But grandma said you have to wake up!"

"She said you're fat because you sleep too much!" Yes, everyone used Ash to give a life lesson. Soon, the whole town of Pallet will start doing that.

"What is a heck?" His niece asked, tilting her head. The boys blinked. Ash always thought that girl was too dangerous for a four years old.

"Okay, sleeping is bad. Now, go downstairs. I'll go change and then we can play."

"Really?"

"Yay!"

"Yes, now go."

Ash sighed after he finally succeeded in kicking the children out. He locked the door and quickly walked over to the nightstand. He picked up his phone and sat on his bed, staring and smiling at the messages he's received.

Yesterday

You're probably sleeping now

Text me in the morning okay?

Today

Okay like usual I woke up before you did

You sleep too much it's impossible

I'm bored

ASH GET THE FCK UP AND CALL ME I'M ON MY PERIOD SO YOU BETTER DO AS I SAY

"Wow, Misty, it's not like I needed to know about that." Ash chuckled as he tapped Misty's phone number. It started to ring instantly.

FINALLY!

"Good morning."

This is noon.

"Really? I didn't notice."

It's bad to oversleep like that.

"Okay. What's up for today?"

Uhm, hello? I thought we were going to have lunch together? Of course, you're going to be late because you just woke up and you have-

"Got it, got it. I'll be there in an hour—or two."

Or three, or four, or five, or six-

"Misty, I'll just take a shower, grab a bite and then I'll join you." Why were girls so dramatic? Ash would never know. Just when he thought he understood completely his best friend, she'd start acting weird again.

He thought he should be able to read her like an open book. He's known her for fifteen years now.

Fine. Make a sign when you're done—I don't know how you'd be able to have lunch after instantly eating, but that's your problem and not mine.

"Skipping meals is bad, Mist." Ash grinned. He pulled out his suitcase from under the bed and started looking for fresh clothes.

The only time you're not eating is when you're sleeping, Ash. Thank God you don't sleepwalk.

"See ya, beauté."

Next time you call me that you're dead.

Ash chuckled as Misty hung up on his face.

Damn, he just loved her.

-

"You should be thankful — you really should be thankful I didn't clean up — are you busy on Monday afternoon? I'm planning on going to visit this exposition with some friends and — Mark is busy so there is no one available who can pick the boys from school — are you busy on Monday afternoon too — I almost forgot! I have an appointment on Monday too — not at the salon, it's an eye check — oh my God, and I promised Leila — oh my god I have too many things — oh, please, don't make me speak about it."

Shut up, Jane, shut up... Ash raised an eyebrow at his sister-in-law. He decided he wasn't going to say anything mean because the woman kept the breakfast on the table.

"So? Are you busy?"

"I'm working." Ash shrugged. He's had enough of watching his nephews for his brothers damn it. You give birth to them; you take care of them.

"Are you suure?"

"Jane, I'm working."

"Well, I thought maybe, just maybe, it's a woman? Huuuum?" Jane quickly walked over to his side and took the seat on Ash's right.

Ash closed his eyes and sighed. He knew it. He knew spending the weekend back at home is a bad idea.

"Of course, I'm not speaking about Misty—Misty is... no, just no." Jane shook her head.

It upset Ash that everyone was talking bad about his best friend and the woman he loved, but he never really showed it. "What's wrong with Misty?"

"Everything!" Jane made a face. "She's not even womanly enough."

"Wow. Womanly enough?"

"She's too rough for a woman. She could be mistaken for your bro, Ash."

"Just because she doesn't wear dresses doesn't mean she can be mistaken for a guy."

"That's not it! She's just... not soft enough, if you know what I mean?"

"No, you make no sense, Jane." Ash hated the fact that he instantly thought about Misty's soft body when Jane said that, but he was not to blame. Misty gained weight on the wrong places, damn it. And, well, Ash thought that was... womanly enough.

"Why do you insist so much on defending her anyway? If she's a tomboy, that's her problem, not yours."

"I wasn't defending anyone. I just think you make no sense."

Jane shrugged. "Maybe because she hangs out too much with you? I don't know. I swear if she grows a beard-"

"Jane! Stop!" Ash chuckled.

"My lips are sealed!"

"After all what you've said, you don't need to keep them sealed now!"

"You can ask anyone and they will tell you! Even Mark can tell you!"

"I don't want to know, and I don't want to ask anyone. Let me have my breakfast, Jane."

"We're back!" a blonde haired woman got inside the kitchen as she held two grocery bags. She placed them on the table. "Clean up this table. Delia's coming."

"Oh—of course! Of course! And who's going to get in trouble? Me, like always! Because I'm way too nice! Oh, Janelle! Janelle! Don't clean up yet! I swear you're my favorite sister-in-law!" Jane freaked out and started dumping every dish in the sink.

Ash rolled his eyes and got up. Everyone was such a drama queen in this family. "It's Kaden who says that, not me."

"Please, no talking about my sweetheart." Leila wiggled her finger in front of her face.

"Did Ash wake—oh, thank God, finally." Delia Ketchum placed the two grocery bags she was carrying on the table too. "Do you know what day this is, Ash?"

"Very funny, mom." Ash waved his hand and made his way to the doorway.

"Wait, mister. At least help us make lunch."

"Not today. I'm going out. Bye."

"Ouuuuuuuuuu." Leila placed her hands in front of her. "Someone has a romantic lunch to get ready for—can I help? Can I?" Delia gave her a weird look when she said the last part.

"It's probably just Misty." Jane rolled her eyes in annoyance. "And please, don't help him pick up clothes and such. He could get mistaken for the woman in the date if he took care of himself!"

"Oh God, Jane..." Ash facepalmed. 

"Oh, come on. Ash never said it's Misty! It's not her, right?" Leila was more optimistic about her brother-in-law's love life, that's for sure.

"It's not like she'd let him go out with anyone else!"

Ash made a face. Why did they discuss his personal matters?

"Does she scare off the women or what?"

"She likes him."

"Ooooooooh, right! She does. Oh my."

"I know! He's stuck with her forever."

"Foreeeever, eeever, and eever!"

"Leila! I'm serious! Don't sing when I'm serious!"

"Are you helping us or not?" And that's all Delia cared about.

Ash shook his head and sighed. How did his brothers and father deal with these women? If all of them were like this, he preferred Misty.

"... bye."

"Don't shave! I'm serious!"

"He never said it was Misty!"

"Those good-for-nothing men!"  

To be continued.