Tyler Pov

I get out of the shower and put on my pajamas.  I raise my hands and see them shaking uncontrollably. I grasps my hand and button my top. I wonder if he will come in today should I pretend nothing happened? Should I confront him about it? Cesar walks into the room. We both make eye contact with one another. "Hey." I say to him. 

He closes the door and hangs up his coat, "Hey." I follow him into our bathroom. I stand behind him looking at his back as he grabs himself a cup of water. I immediately started to get emotional and hug him from behind. I feel like he is so far away and I don't know what to do. I start welling up tears and sniffing my nose. He places his hands on mine and removes them from around his waist. I reinforce it and hold on tighter and start crying. He attempts to turn so he could see me but I wouldn't let him. 

"How am I suppose to talk to you if you won't let me turn around?" He sounds tired. He finally pulls away from me. "I'm going to take a shower and head to bed. You should too."  He turns on the shower as I stand against the door. I knock on the wall to get his attention. He looks up at me as he takes off his shirt. 

"Are we... ok?" I could barely sign it my hands are shaking. 

"I don't want to talk about it right now. I'm emotionally tired." Angrily i grab a pillow from the bed at him. Shocked that I would do something like that he yells, "WHAT THE FUCK!?" 

"Your lucky it wasn't a brick! I'm on the verge of having a panic attack so PLEASE TELL ME ARE WE OKAY SO I CAN SLEEP TONIGHT!" i'm on the verge of hyperventilating. "If you don't want me to go then fine!"

"No..." 

"I mean i don't care!" 

"No.NO. NO! STOP Talking!" He yells back at me. He yelled so loud I jumped.  " I DON'T WANT YOU TO DO IT ONLY TO MAKE ME HAPPY. I KNOW YOU WANT THIS! WHY WOULD I WANT THAT!?" He takes a moment, " Why would you do that?" He starts wiping his eyes. 

"Why would I what?" 

"Give up something you painfully wanted for me? You would really turn it down because i'm not happy?"

I walk up to him and pull him close to me. I wipe his tears and give him a soft smile.  "Of course I would, because I love you." 

He freezes immediately almost as stiff as a board. He pulls away from me and grabs his toiletries, "I can't stay here. Don't expect me back tonight." Speechless I watch in slow motion Cesaer walking away from me.  He slams the door on the way out. I bury my face in my hands and sob. 

Out in the hallway I hear, "¿¡Qué diablos está pasando!? Escuché gritos, Cesar, ¡¿por qué están cerrando las malditas puertas (What the hell is going on!? I heard screaming, Cesar, why are you fucking slamming the doors ?!)"

 Then another slams. 

Rosie runs into my room and joins me on my bed, "What happened?"  I just start crying in arms uncontrollably. She holds me tight and rocks me back and forth. "It'll be okay, sweet heart. I don't what the hell Cesar is doing but I brought him into this world and I can take him out." 

I break my cries with a choked up laugh. I know she was trying to get me to feel better but im just so sad. 

"I don't what happened. I just told him I love him... That I would do anything for him to be happy" I take a moment to breathe. Rosie's eyes widened. " I don't know whats wrong."

"Did he say it back!?"  I shake my head as i begin to get worked up again. 

"You poor thing. One thing is for sure the Kinderman boys are weird when it comes to how they feel and they don't do it in the best way. Cesar hasn't had someone like you in his life and I think that he is starting to realize that he is scared about what your relationship means in regards to his life. And now even more so with your internship. " 

"I'm scared too. He is my first real boyfriend. I wonder about things too but... "

"You are afraid he will abandon you..."  All my life I feel like i have tossed aside for who i am. I grew in being confident with myself but relationship is something I always insecure in. 

I hug her tighter. I miss his hugs. 

"It will all work out. I promise." She ends up leaving and I started heading to bed crying myself to sleep. 

 The next day,  I was a wreck. I didn't want to go out and do anything. I looked out the window and saw he kindermans out and about playing around and talking. If I go out there, will he be like he was yesterday?

There was a knock on my door, I walk up to the door and open it. It was Emma. 

"Hey..." she says in a soft tone. 

I wave at her. 

"I wanted to check on you. I heard you had a rough night. I never heard cesear like that." I let her in. I grab my phone and type it to her. 

Is he still mad?

 "He seemed okay this morning. I can tell he is looking around for you though. I don't know why he would think you would be out by yourself though considering what happened." She places her hands on my shoulder. "I'm here to go out with you but you need to wash up first." 

After finally getting ready I'm make my way out with Emma who had herself linked to me the arm.  She walks me over to Rosie and Torsha who were setting up the table for breakfast. Rosie greets me first by hugging me. I glance over at Cesar who hasn't stopped looking at me since coming out. When he saw I noticed him he looks away and continues talking to Adrian. 

"Here have some coffee." Torsha says as she hands me a cup. "EVERYONE COME AND GET FOOD!" 

Everyone comes over and when I sit down there was one seat empty beside me. I look up and see Cesear coming to sit next to me. No body is looking at cesear and quietly eating. Cesar proceeds to get his food. 

"Aren't you going to say good morning to Tyler?" Emma says in an annoyed tone. Absolute silence. I could almost die right now. He looks at me. He looks tired like he didn't get a lot of rest last night. "Good Morning." 

I nod, "Good morning to you too." 

Rosie gives her son a look that could kill 1000 times over. The rest of breakfast proceeds as normal with the exception of Cesar not really talking to me. I look around and take in the scenery around me. Our table was beside a very big lake and on the far side was a forest that surrounds the whole lake and the house. 

After breakfast we all get to our canoes. It seems like couples and groups are pairing off and I look around confused. Cesar clears his throat and hands me an oar, "You ready to go?" 

I nod slowly and grab the oar from his hands and follow him towards to edge of the lake. He places his oar inside the boat and then looks at my life jacket and start messing with it. "Making sure it's on right." 

I clear my throat, "Thank you." 

He helps me get in and we start pedaling, its quiet as we both just take in the rest of the family's excitement.

"Im sorry. This is not how I wanted to spend our time here. "

"We are still here. It doesn't have to end this way." 

"I guess you are right...." He looks at me with a serious look, "Why didn't you tell me you applied for the internship. I feel like even if you weren't sure or not, you would have told me." 

 I paused for a moment to make sure I knew what I wanted to say, "We were still very new in our relationship. I didn't know that at the time we would have lasted... but it became harder telling you as time went on and I got closer to you. I signed up for it in the beginning of the year we didn't start dating until a couple months after." He takes a moment to take it in as he rowed. 

"I just wished you would have told me sooner..." 

"Would you have broken up with me then? To save you the trouble?"  I Say annoyed. 

He looked at me confused, "No, I would have helped... or maybe i just wished so I had more time to process what could be rather than finding out now." 

"I really didn't think i would get it." 

"Shut up. You are amazing. Of course you would have gotten it. They would be stupid not to." He said as he put the oars back inside stopping to boat and we floated in the middle of the lake. "..... I want you to go...." 

My heart started beating faster, "Cesar..." 

" You deserve it. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity. Who knows what will come next for you after..."  I slowly make my way over to him as tears stared to well. 

"What does that mean for us?" I sign to him nervously. He grabs my hands in his and holds it softly. 

"I- think we should take a break up."