There are two ways to go about this week.

I can spend it avoiding every person involved in the confusing fight yesterday, especially my older sister na hindi biniyayaan ng talent sa pagsisinungaling. Gusto kong ipakita ang galit at inis sa pagbabalewala nila sa mga tanong ko. I won't give a damn about anything that's happening around me at pananatilihin na lang ang ignorance ko sa mga bagay-bagay.

If the fight comes, then I'll just strategize and win.

The other option was to ignore but investigate. I will walk and act like I used to, as if yesterday did not happen at all or some soulbearer wiped my memory, but I won't disregard all the confusing information I've gathered over the past weeks. Kung hindi nila sasagutin ang tanong ko, e'di ako ang sasagot.

Ako ang maghahanap ng sagot.

Kaya naman nandito ako sa Awanggan kasama ang apat na taong naging buntot ko na. There were only about ten or fifteen people inside the huge dining room, so if I order Azriel to dance now, no one would know.

Pagkatapos ng nangyaring laban kahapon, naging tensiyonado ang academy. The faculty tried to ease the situation, keeping the alarmed students calm, but it wasn't very effective. Kokonting estudyante lang ang nagpakita sa Awanggan, dahil marami sa kanila ang naniniwala na mapoprotektahan sila sa kanilang House.

Well, that's their choice. Ako kasi, gusto ko lang kumain.

Also, another plus was... walang classes ngayon!

"Nagtataka din ako, Raven. Paniguradong may tinatago sila." seryosong saad ni Tamara sa harap ko. Nakalimutan na niyang may kinakain pa siya kaya inu-unti-unti ko ang laman ng plato. "Pero ano nga naman ang kailangan ng mga taong 'yon sa'yo?"

Tanungin mo 'ko ng tanong ko rin sa sarili, Tamara.

"Basta, one vote up ako doon sa sinabi ni Raven na baka tungkol sa pamilya," komento ni Eva na abala sa pagngunguya. "Who knows? Sa sobrang greedy ni Tito Hector, baka nga may nabangga na siyang hindi dapat."

Well, the right term for my father would be ambitious.

Tumango si Griffin. Nanatili namang tahimik ngunit nakikinig si Azriel.

He's so obvious! He tries so hard to focus on his food. Hindi din siya mapaghahalataan dahil sa mask na suot, but I can see his ears twitching or his subtle eyeing at our side. Noong tinuro ang Art of Eavesdropping, natutulog ata si Azriel.

"Pero that means na ang nakabangga niya ay may koneksiyon sa Alondra." ani Tamara. "War and Ruin are part of that group! If it's possible na sa pamilya, then a high member of Hiraya is associated with them!"

Muling sumang-ayon si Griffin at inilipat ang atensiyon kay Eva, naghihintay sa susunod na sagot.

"Hindi naman kasi na dahil nakakulong sila sa ilalim ay wala na silang komunikasyon sa taas. You should also remember that before Alondra was locked away, it contained well-reputable citizens." Eva argued.

Griffin once again changed teams, giving a very convincing nod to everyone in the table, even clapping his hand. All that while still chewing his food like a starving man.

"The previous regent of defense."

Napatingin kami kay Azriel nang sumali na siya sa usapan. He wasn't looking at us, but rather outside the window with a faraway gaze. Akala mo naman ilang taon na siyang namumuhay sa mundo at nagkakaroon ng war flashbacks.

"Regent of defense?" I frowned. "Like Dustine's father?"

Tumango si Griffin at Eva, pero ang babae ang sumagot dahil abala pa ang nauna sa pagnamnam ng pritong manok.

"Before he was appointed, Eleazar occupied that position for decades. Back then, Dustine's dad was only the regent of war. Nagkaroon lang ng problema nang mag-away ang hari at si Eleazar. Hindi nagtagal ay namatay din siya."

"He died? After a fight with the king?"

"He was labelled as a traitor to the country. Lalo na't tinulungan niya si Ryuu at Sarienne na makaalis dito. But his death... there are a lot of stories that defies what the Palace told its people. Especially when copies of a banned book circulated around Alora-"

"Banned book?" Familiar, huh.

"The Souls Within Us." Azriel answered, staring directly at my eyes. "Sinulat iyon ni Sarienne and Ryuu."

"Oh! Kung gano'n, para bang romance story ito?" I chuckled. "Ryuu and Sarienne probably loved each other very much pero tutol ang kasalukuyang hari kaya pinaghiwalay sila. But the couple disagreed and decided to leave, asking help for their fellow official friend, who might have had feelings for Sarienne."

Nagulat ako nang tumawa sila. Kung masobrahan man ako sa inis ngayon, baka si Griffin ang ingudngod ko sa pagkaing nilalantakan niya. React ng react pero 'di naman makapagsalita dahil abala ang bibig.

Bakit nga ba nandito 'to? Noong nakaraan sina Stuart kasama niya. Paminsan-minsan naman nakikita kong sumasama kina Giovanni. Walang solid na circle ang isang 'to at sasabay lang kahit kanino.

"Ryuu loved Sarienne with his whole heart, yes, but they were not together. It was Ezreal who Sarienne was wed and had an offspring to."

"Remember, Raven? From the book, Sarienne came back when her eldest son was threatened. Doon din nagsimula ang Second War."

I pursed my lips. "Makakalimutin talaga kasi ako pagdating sa mga libro, unless patayan sila." sandali akong tumigil. "Well, I mean, patayan din naman 'yan pero medyo boring ang history for me. But good for you, AA! Ikaw na ang aking memory refresher."

Azriel made a small scoff, as if to completely disregard my comment, but his eyes were filled with amusement. Iniwas niya ang tingin sa'kin na abala sa pag-aaral ng reaksiyon niya.

"You've read the book?" Eva's question saved Azriel from my staring.

Nagkibit-balikat ako. "Iniwan ni glasses boy sa detention room kaya tiningnan namin. Hanggang sa may ambush nga lang ako at hindi na nabasa ulit."

Sumimangot ako nang umiling-iling si Griffin na akala mo'y nadismaya sa sagot ko. Pinanlakihan ko siya ng mata bilang babala pero pinagpatuloy pa niya. As revenge, I grabbed the large piece of chicken in his plate and dumped it on Azriel who looked as if he was blessed by the gods.

Hindi niya kasi nakitang ninakaw lang 'yon kaya kung makapag-pasalamat, akala mo sinalba ko buhay niya.

"Kailangan mong ingatan ang librong 'yon, Raven." paalala ni Tamara. "There's only limited access to the documents about the Second War. Kahit nga si Paham ay nalimitahan sa mga dokumento tungkol doon. Most of the information are stored in the Palace, with only the royal family's permission for access."

"Pero paano nagkaroon si Tsukishima, isang hamak na estudyante, ng copy ng banned na libro?" Griffin decided to ask his first question.

Bumisita ang pagtataka sa mukha ng dalawang babae. I guess they were also wondering how a simple student got access to such 'forbidden' books.

"Mula sa library." I answered nonchalantly. "I found it there first pero siya nagborrow."

"The library?" kumunot ang noo ni Eva. "Why would Paham put it in the library? It should be in the archivesㅡ"

"Archives?"

One small word was able to get my full attention. Sounds dangerous kaya naman agad kong tinanong kung ano.

Eva looked surprised at my question. Ilang segundo pa bago siya nakasagot, "I-It's a restricted section in the library where all the old books are stored. No one's really have access to it. Si Paham lang at iilang Academy members. Pero... kasi, 'pag mga ganiyang libro, it's supposed to be in there."

Naalala ko ang hidden door na natagpuan ko no'ng unang pasok sa library. It wasn't really me who found it, but I saw one person enter that door. Nang lapitan ko, nakalagay din doon na restricted section siya... so it's possibly the archives, right?

There's no real evidence that my family is involved with Alondra matters, but their constant presence over me is worrying. Kahit na maliit lang ang probability, siguradong may gaganapin akong role sa kung ano mang mangyayari dito. At the very least, I have to be informed and well-prepared.

If I can trace this matters back to the old history, then maybe I can understand what the people around me wants. Kapag naintindihan ko na at nakonekta ang ganap ko dito, makakagawa ako ng plano para maiwasan ang masali sa gulo.

First, I need to check the archives.

I willed my face to look worried. Bahagya kong kinagat ang ibabang labi at mabigat na bumuntong-hininga dahil may napakalaki akong problema na kaharap.

"I have the book..." I said in a slow manner. "Pero baka mapahamak ako kung magtagal 'yon sa'kin. I need to bring it back, right?"

"Hindi lang sa tagal. Baka mapahamak ka din dahil hawak mo ang isang banned na libro." Tamara added.

Griffin nodded in agreement. "Pwede mong sabihin na si Tsukishima ang may sala, but if he denies it then you won't get out of trouble."

I guess that implies that Tsuki has a solid reputation in this academy than me. I mean, hindi naman ako magtataka kung ganiyan. I doubt the student would vouch for a person who parades their hallway with black clothing.

Ha! Sorry na lang kayo at exempted daw ako.

"You can give it directly to Paham but..." Eva chewed on her lip. "I think he's a bit busy with some serious affairs... Wala din masyadong power kaming Elites diyan pero-ah!" nanlaki ang mata niya. "Alam ko na! Ibigay mo na lang kay Helios!"

I frowned. "Si araw?"

"Yeah," she nodded, smiling. "He has access to the archives kaya pwedeng siya na ang bumalik."

Mas lalong kumunot ang noo ko. "I thought Elites do not have permission? Bakit naman nagka-special privilege siya?"

"Because he's Helios!"

Tumatawa-tawa pa sila as if may nakakatawa naman.

Because he's Helios? That's a dumb answer. Pake ko naman kung siya si Helios at kung 'yon ang pangalan niya. If I name my son that, will he immediately be given special access? Kapag ba nag-Helios hunting ako ngayon, may privilege silang nakukuha?

E'di sana pala nagspecial request ako kay Mama noon na pangalanan akong Helios at hindi isang ibon.

"Did you save Hiraya in the past?"

Nagulat ang lalaking mala-ginto ang pangalan dahil sa tanong ko. Helios blinked, startled and confused at the question. Dahan-dahan niyang ibinaba ang hawak na pen para taimtim akong titigan. He pushed his glasses up, and I followed that movement closely.

He looks ridiculously handsome in glasses that it's unfair.

"Save Hiraya?"

I twirled the pen in my hand before resting my chin on it. "Yeah. Ano ang napakalaking contribution mo sa Hiraya at mukhang pinapahalagahan ka ng mga tao?"

He still looks like a lost puppy, robbed of words to answer that question.

"Is it because you're the heir of this school?"

Suddenly, his gaze hardened. "I don't know anything about what you're saying," he swiftly tapped the pen on the book between us. "I should be the one asking you questions, not the other way around. Are you done answering this so I can..."

I rolled my eyes, ignoring the rest of his words. No one can really hear us in the empty classroom. I guess one of the perks of being an Elite is to grab any vacant room and use it for yourself without complaints. Agad kasi kaming may study area.

Tumayo ako at umikot para umupo sa tabi niya. The moment the heat hit me and we were aware of each other's presence, his words slowed down. Naging komportable na ako sa upuan, gripping his wrist to stop the heat, at siya'y parang estatwa lang. His breathing was slow and heavy, with lips slightly parted in surprise and a look questioning my change of seats.

"I can understand it better from here po." I answered, scooting closer and adjusting the book. "Sobrang init at mabilis akong madistract kapag sa unahan mo nakaupo. Dito, mas mabilis mo ding makikita kung tama ang gawa ko."

Tumigil ako sa pag-aayos ng mga gamit sa mesa nang walang marinig na kahit ano mula sa kaniya. I turned to give him an odd look, but was surprised at our close proximity.

Pero akala mo naman si kamatayan ako kung makatalon siya't makaatras. The chair squeaked when he aggressively flinched back, knocking into his notebook in the process. Nagmamadali niyang inayos ang mga gamit at hindi na makatingin sa'kin pagkatapos. I couldn't help but notice how his ears and neck has a slight flush, pero iniwasan ko na lang ang magkomento.

"Baka magka-heart attack ka na, Heli. Should I just ask for another tutor?"

Agad niya akong binalingan, kunot-noo na at walang bahid na hiya sa mukha. "Why?"

Now, I was the one stumped. He asked it with such accusation in his voice that I couldn't respond quickly.

"I just told you. You're so easily surprised that I fear you might get a heart attack."

"I'm not. I-" he cleared his throat. "I was deep in thought so I didn't notice you-"

"Ano namang thoughts iyang kinalulunuran mo?"

He avoided my teasing smirk, shifting in his seat and pointing at the book. "Anyway. You don't need to look for another tutor. Let's continue with this discussion of-"

"Tinatamad na akong makinig sa tan lines at geography-"

"It's tangent and geometry. Specifically, we're talking about trigonometry-"

"As if naman pupunta ako sa ibang lugar at kailangan kong malaman ang dimension ng Hiraya-"

"This is math, not science. And I'm not asking you to calculate the area of-"

"Kaya sabihin mo sa'kin kung bakit may special privilege ka."

Despite my complete disregard for his interruptions and avoidance of our topic, he didn't look annoyed. Even his next words were answered with patience.

"You said it yourself. I am one of the owner of this academy, so I'm entitled to more than the standard student's rights. But I don't like using it..." he frowned. "Why did you want to know?"

I have no idea why I'm very direct to the point too. Was I too confident in my convincing skills that I'm going head-on for Helios? Or does he look very submissive to my demands that I thought it'll be easy?

He looks and sometimes acts soft around me, yes, but there are also certain times where I'm reminded why he's the strongest soulbearer. Whenever I see him in the halls alone, I understand why students both feared and admired him. Helios does not only radiate the power of the sun, but also the honor, strength, and authority of a leader.

Pero kasi... parang ang dali lang sabihin ng mga bagay dito... kasama siya. I usually have reservations, especially on things I know and plan, but those walls seems to have melted.

I have mixed feelings about making him my confidant.

But... Helios is far easier to conquer than any of the academy members and the tight-lipped Paham.

Kinuha ko ang libro mula sa bag at inilagay iyon sa mesa. Maigi kong tiningnan ang magiging reaksiyon niya. Aside from the small frown in his forehead, he looked unconcerned.

"Nakuha ko siya mula sa detention room." saad ko bago pa siya makapagtanong. "Someone put it under my desk and recently ko lang nalaman na banned pala 'yan. I'm not supposed to have that in my possession, kaya binabalik ko sa inyoㅡ"

"Have you read it?"

"Konti lang dahil nacurious ako no'ng una. I'm not planning to read it all because, duh, I'm not a fan of books kaya."

Kahit na walang kaemo-emosyon si Helios ay nagmukha pa rin siyang problemado. He was burning the book with his stare. Doon ko hiningi na magkaroon ng psyche souls kagaya nina Dad at Ellis para lang mabasa ko kung anong nasa utak niya ngayon.

I expected him to be surprised, slightly upset, or quick to hide the book from anyone's view. I was expecting a number of questions to be thrown my way, or to be interrogated for having a book that the Palace desperately hides from its people.

I did not expect him to stand up, gesturing for me to follow. Hindi ko inasahang pupunta kami sa library, patungo sa isang kwarto na may daanan rin papunta sa restricted section.  Hindi ko inasahan na tatayo siya sa madilim na hagdan at lilingon sa'kin, para itanong kung susunod ba ako o hindi.

We were in one of the private rooms of the library. Tanging mga authorized people, Academy members o ang Dean ang pwedeng pumasok sa kwarto. Behind one of the oak shelves was a large metal door that opens upon recognizing Helios' soul item. I immediately recognized it as the archives that they talk about, but I couldn't see what's inside dahil sa sobrang dilim.

Hindi ko mapigilan ang mahinang pagtawa. "Was I wrong to think that you're a stickler for rules, Helios?"

Umiling siya.

"I am."

"Then why are you breaking your lovely rules now? I feel like a serpent biting a human so it would rebel against life."

He angled his body sideways to me, tilting his head slightly. In the darkness, he was glowing. Like the sun that would shed light to any dark place. Like a savior to all that's damned for eternity.

"If you're the serpent," he pursed his lip to hide a smile. "There will be a lot of rebellious humans then."

His statement made me chuckle. May sasabihin pa sana akong pangontra pero nabigla kaming dalawa nang unti-unting magbukas ang pintuan. I turned to the slowly-opening door with wide eyes, the book tucked in my hands, as I tried to think of excuses. Pwede ko lang naman sigurong isisi ang lahat kay Helios, 'no?

Pft. That would make me a most hated villain if I did. Ini-exploit ko na lang ang mabuting loob ng isang 'to..

Kung makikita ako ngayon, hindi naman siguro sobrang tindi ng parusa, ano? Baka 5 days lang sa detention room o magka-"No speaking rule" na siguro ako. Well... any of that is acceptable as long as may pagkain.

Iniisip ko na ang nakakaiyak na parusang pwede kong makaharap ngayon nang hatakin ako ni Helios papasok. I almost lost my balance if it wasn't for his hand on my waist. Inayos niya ang pagkakatayo ko at iniwan ako mag-isa do'n. He gave me a quick glance before closing the door just as the other one opened too.

And I was left all alone in the vast darkness, with only his remaining heat as companion.