"Step out of your comfort zone..."

AVERY

Sa kabila ng naggagandahang tahanan at mga gusaling bato, napansin ko na pawang matatamlay ang mga taong naglalakad sa gilid ng kalsada ng bayan ng Tresha. Marami na ring kawal ang nag-iikot sa kaharian at ang ilan ay nambubugbog pa ng mga taong hindi sumusunod sa kanila. Naramdaman ko naman ang pag-igting ng mga panga ni Zirrius. Hindi niya gusto ang mga nasasaksihan. Kundi ko lang siya pinapaalalahanan ay baka kanina pa siya nakipag-away. Sa tingin ko, ito ang naging bunga ng pagkontrol ni King Aulius kay King Luke. Hindi na sila malaya. Kung maaari ko lang silang tulungan ay ginawa ko na pero wala pa akong sapat na lakas. Ni hindi ko pa nga maharap ang problema ng Elfania. I needed more power and allies. I couldn't win these fights alone.

Malapit na kaming makarating sa bukas na gate papalabas sa Tresha ngunit hinarang kami ng dalawang kawal. Natatakpan ang mga mukha nina Zirrius at Kendrick ng hood kaya sigurado akong hindi pa sila nakikilala ng mga kawal. Maybe these guards were doing a checkpoint. This would be bad if they commanded these two guys to show their faces.

"Lower your hoods," seryosong utos ng isang kawal. Ito na nga ba ang sinasabi ko. Gusto kong mapailing pero wala akong sariling katawan upang gawin 'yon. Napalunok si Zirrius at maging si Kendrick ay natigilan. Nahalata ko ang tensiyong bumalot sa kalamnan ni Zirrius. He didn't expect to be caught like this. Sino ba naman kasi ang magpapalabas sa kanila habang natatakpan ang kanilang mga mukha? They could be some criminals for Pete's sake.

"What shall we do now?" mahinang tanong ni Zirrius sa utak niya. Halatang hindi niya alam ang gagawing hakbang. If we got caught, it would be over for us. Pero hindi ko pa maaaring gamitin ang katawan niya. Kagagaling lang niya. Ayokong mas lalong abusuhin ang katawan niya.

"Sorry. I'm out here. Ikaw na ang bahalang lumutas sa problemang ito. Mukhang hindi naman sila ganu'n kalakas," natatawang sambit ko. "Treat this as the first stage of your training. Bahala ka na kung malulusutan mo. You need to build your stamina for you to wield greater power," dagdag ko pa. He hissed and frowned.

"Since you still don't know how to cast any spells, better make your body stronger. Wala pang isang kilometro ang layo ninyo mula sa gates at malakas naman si Aris," natatawang saad ko. Napailing si Zirrius pero lumingon siya kay Kendrick na naghihintay sa utos niya. Zirrius wanted to make a run out of this Kingdom and Kendrick easily understands his intentions. Sabay pa silang tumango kasabay ng paghagupit nila sa kani-kanilang mga kabayo na mabilis namang tumakbo. Halos matumba ang mga kawal na humarang sa kanila dahil sa pagkagulat. Hindi rin agad nakahuma ang mga tao at kawal na nagmamasid sa kanila.

Nang makahuma ang mga kawal, agad silang nagpaulan ng mga palaso kina Zirrius at Kendrick na ikinatawa ko. They all missed their shots. Masyadong mabilis ang mga galaw ng kabayo nina Zirrius at Kendrick. It was like their horses were dancing with arrows with ease. Humarang na ang mga kawal sa gate dahil huli na ang lahat upang isara pa ito. Naglabas na sila ng kani-kanilang sandata at espada. They were really determined to stop the two unknown rogues.

Mabilis na kinuha ni Zirrius ang espada na nakasakbit sa likuran niya. Mabilis din niyang inalis ang puting tela na bumabalot dito. I noticed that his swords was glistening under the sun. It almost reflected gold even when it wasn't gold. Maybe the sun played some tricks for that to happen. Ngayon ko lang napansin ang magandang hubog ng kanyang espada at ang matalas na talim nito na pwede na ring pagsalaminan. Natitiyak kong napakagaling ng nagpanday ng espada niya. Hindi ito ganu'n kalaki at kahaba pero napansin ko ang maliliit na sulat sa gitna ng katawan nito. I couldn't see and read it clearly. Saktong-sakto lang ang espada para kay Zirrius. It was like the sword was really meant for him alone.

Sabay-sabay na sumugod sa kanila ang mga nakaharang na kawal. Sa bilang ko ay nasa sampu ang mga ito. Zirrius dodged their attacks with every swings of his sword. Heavy metals clanked in the air. Aris growled as it jumped in the air to get through the obstacles. Maging si Kendrick ay ganu'n din ang ginawa. Mas lalo nilang pinabilis ang kanilang mga kabayo nang tuluyang malampasan ang mga kawal na nakaharang sa kanilang daan. Patuloy ang pag-ulan ng mga palaso pero tumigil din naman iyon nang tuluyan silang makalayo. They managed to get out of Tresha, safely.

"That's not fun," I commented. "Sana bumaba ka kay Aris para pagpawisan ka naman," I said and giggled.

"Tss. I don't want to waste time. Malayo pa ang susunod na kaharian. Gusto ko na ring makapunta sa Elfania sa lalong madaling panahon. I can't wait to get you out of my system," seryosong saad niya. Malawak na disyerto ang tinahak namin. The sands carried by the wind were clouding Zirrius' eyesight.

"Not so fast. Bago ka lumakas, kulang ang isang taon. I still need to train you. Unless you are naturally born to be a great magic weilder then maybe you can master every spells on a short period of time," sagot ko sa kanya. "Habang naglalakbay tayo, sisimulan na natin ang pagsasanay mo," dagdag ko pa. Kumunot ang noo niya. Bahagya niyang tinatakpan ang ilong at bibig dahil sa mga buhangin na lumilipad sa mukha niya. Bahagyang pumipikit ang mga mata niya upang hindi mapuwing. He was actually adorable and cute even when he was already sweating under the sun's heat.

"Labing-isang araw ang gugugulin natin sa paglalakbay na ito. Malayo ang Hysteria at hindi natin kakayanin ang tuloy-tuloy na paglalakbay. Ang masaklap pa, aabutin pa tayo ng tatlong araw bago natin marating ang bukal. Kailangan nating tipidin ang tubig at pagkain," seryosong saad naman ni Kendrick.

"He's right. By the way, I need you to run for miles. Kasama ito sa pagsasanay mo kaya tamang-tama na nasa disyerto tayo. It's a good exercise to condition your body and mind," natatawang sambit ko pa. Wala talaga akong balak na maging mabait sa training niya. He frowned. Hindi niya alam kung seryoso ba ako sa sinasabi ko o pinagti-trip-an ko na naman siya.

"Of course, I'm serious just like how Zirrius you are," natatawang sabi ko pa. "Kaya simulan mo na ngayon. Bumaba ka na kay Aris at kailangan mo ng magpapawis," I said mischievously with a giggle. He frowned and decided not to listen on my orders. He was not buying any of my words. Mas pinili niyang magbingi-bingihan.

"Fine. Kung ayaw mong lumakas agad para makabalik sa Alveria, huwag ka ng magsanay. Hindi ko naman kawalan 'yon. Ang problema lang, kung babalik kang mahina, baka hindi mo na mailigtas ang mga taong mahal mo. What about your people? How about Liana? Tiyak na pinagpipiyestahan na siya ni Leo ngayon at wala ka man lang magawa," natatawang pang-aasar ko pa sa kanya. I know that what I was saying was below the belt but I need to hit him hard in the head. Gusto kong matauhan siya at magising. I didn't want him to slack just because he was away from those important to him. Ayaw kong maging kampante siya dahil walang madali sa mundong ginagalawan niya. Everything in this life is unfair and cruel. Hindi patas ang buhay para sa lahat.

He gritted his teeth with anger. Hindi niya nagustuhan ang sinabi ko. Ramdam ko ang pag-igting ng mga panga niya at ang tensiyong bumalot sa kalamnan niya. He wanted to yell at me but he couldn't. Alam niyang kahit papaano ay tama ako. May punto ako. I know I was being cruel and insensitive but I need to drive him. Or might as well control him.

"So what do you want to do? Tutunganga ka na lang ba habang naghihirap ang mga taong pinapahalagahan mo? Hihintayin mo na lang na magkahimala habang unti-unti silang nasisira at nawawalan ng pag-asa? I didn't save you for nothing," seryosong dagdag ko pa. Napansin ko ang pag-igting ng mga bagang niya at ang malalim na paghugot ng hininga. He sighed heavily as if he was letting go of all his frustrations. Mabigat na mabigat ang pakiramdam niya. He missed his homeland. He missed Liana. He missed his whole kingdom and everything that was rightfully his. Hindi pa rin nawawala ang sakit ng pagkawala ng mga tao at bagay na mahalaga sa kanya. I doubt if he could ever get over it. Hindi na ako umaasa pero at least, maaari ko itong gamitin upang mapilitan siyang magpalakas.

"Trouble, siguraduhin mo lang na lalakas ako dahil kung hindi ko mabawi ang kaharian ko, ikaw ang babalikan ko upang singilin," seryoso at malalim na saad niya. I smiled inside his subconsciousness.

"I'll pay for my debt then," seryosong sagot ko sa kanya. Kahit labag pa rin sa kalooban niya ay napilitan siyang bumaba kay Aris. He handed his horse to Kendrick who was now confused.

"I'll be running. Just take your time and take care of Aris," seryosong saad ni Zirrius kay Kendrick. Hindi pa rin maalis ang naguguluhang tingin ni Kendrick kay Zirrius.

"Mapapagod ka lang," he commented out of the blue.

"I need some exercise," kibit-balikat na sagot ni Zirrius. Hindi na niya hinintay pa ang sasabihin ni Kendrick. He started to jog on the dessert. Hindi niya alintana ang lumulubog na paa sa buhangin na nagpapahirap sa pagtakbo niya. Nasa likod lang si Kendrick at hindi na nagtangkang humabol pa dahil hawak-hawak niya ang tali ni Aris. I smiled again. This would be the start of our long cruel journey. I could clearly see the sun smiling over us. Well, I hoped that the sun would always be this bright for us.

~~~~

Ilang kilometro na ang tinakbo ni Zirrius. He was running and walking for almost six hours. He was now down on his trembling knees. He was now struggling for his breathe. Hinihingal na siya at naliligo na rin sa pawis. He could almost taste the salty sweat on his buds. Dumidikit na rin ang buhangin sa katawan niya. He was already craving to take a bath. Too bad there was nothing here for him to do that. I wouldn't mind to see some live show today. Malapit na ring lumubog ang araw. Nanunuyo na ang kanyang lalamunan dahil sa pagtitiis na huwag uminom ng maraming tubig.

"Masyado mong pinapagod ang sarili mo," komento ni Kendrick na ngayon ay nakahabol na sa kanya. Napailing naman si Zirrius habang patuloy na hinihingal.

"Kulang pa," Zirrius commented. I was glad he knew that it was not enough. This distance will never be enough to be strong. Pinilit ni Zirrius na tumayo sa kabila ng panginginig ng tuhod pero hindi na niya kinaya. Muli siyang napaluhod dahil sa panghihina. Napailing naman si Kendrick nang bumaba siya sa kabayo niya. Walang kahirap-hirap na binuhat niya sa likod si Zirrius at isinampa sa kabayo niya. Nanghihina na talaga si Zirrius kaya hindi na niya nagawang magprotesta.

"Magpahinga ka muna," seryosong saad ni Kendrick. Muli siyang sumakay sa kabayo at ipinagpatuloy ang paglalakbay. He was still guiding Aris because Zirrius couldn't even move his fingers now.

"This is bad but he's right. Kailangan mo munang magpahinga. I will not push you to your limits. Close your eyes and listen to everything I say now. This is still part of your training," seryosong saad ko. Zirrius hissed with annoyance. But still, he closed his eyes but the problem was he was too tired and he couldn't help but fell asleep. Napangiti ako sa sarili ko. Maybe I should let him for today. I would just visit him on his dream.

~~~

"Zirrius..." mahinang tawag ko sa kanya. He was now in the middle of his dream and I was here again to see how he was doing. My presence would surely piss him off. Elves have the power to control someone else dream. I could be on his dream anytime I wanted. At mas madali ko na itong nagagawa dahil nasa loob naman ako ng katawan niya. But then again, he couldn't possibly imagine my face unless I let him. Unless I let him see my real form through manipulating his dream. Sa ngayon, hahayaan ko munang hindi niya ako makilala. I would not remove this light illuminating up my face on his imagination.

He looked at me with confusion. Halata sa mukha niya na hindi niya ako gustong makita. He was still grieving for his loss. Kahit hindi niya sabihin, nararamdaman ko pa rin ang tahimik na paghihirap niya.

"Hanggang dito ba naman, hindi mo ako patatahimikin?" he asked with a frown. He looked up at the starry sky. I was glad that he was alone. I didn't want to see Liana right now. Something deep inside was haunting me. I should have done something for Liana and save her from her possible doom but then I chose to leave her because she might be a burden for this journey. I should have tried to remove her dark seal if my hunch was right that she was under the King's control too. My selfishness was haunting me. My conscience was shouting at me. Pero ano ba ang magagawa ko? Hindi ko rin naman alam kung paano aalisin ang dark seal na 'yon.

"Kahit gusto kong bigyan ka ng panahon para sa sarili mo, hindi maaari. We don't have much time. Habang papalapit tayo nang papalapit sa Elfania, mas lalong lumalakas ang mga kalabang naghihintay sa 'tin. I'm a part of you now. Sa ayaw at sa gusto mo, mararamdaman mo pa rin ang presensiya ko," pang-aasar ko pa sa kanya. Dahan-dahang umupo ako sa isang malapad na bato. I looked up too and stared at the vast sky.

"What are you thinking?" mahinang tanong ko sa kanya dahil natahimik siya na parang tinatanggap na lang ang sinasabi ko.

"I'm thinking if I can really trust you," matapat na sagot niya. Natigilan ako at tiningnan siya nang matiim.

"Why?" takang tanong ko sa kanya.

"Because you always leave the most important part of your story untold. You always leave the other part of the truth behind. Kalhati lang ng katotohanan ang sinasabi mo. Alam kong marami kang itinatago sa 'kin. Hindi mo ikinukwento ang lahat-lahat tungkol sa 'yo. Why is that? Because maybe, like me, you don't trust me too, right?" seryosong tanong niya sa 'kin. He was deeply staring at me even when he couldn't possibly see my real face. But then, something on the way he stare made me feel naked. Ramdam ko ang kagustuhan niyang malaman kung sino ba talaga ako sa pamamagitan lang ng titig niya.

Nag-iwas ako ng tingin. I couldn't stare at him for long. His stare was piercing through the deepest part of my soul. But he was right. I couldn't give my trust and faith to him. I was being cautious. After all, I still didn't know if he's an enemy or an ally. Maybe for now, he was my ally but I didn't know which side he would take after we reached Elfania.

"If we can't trust each other then it will be absurd to ask for each other's help," makahulugang saad ni Zirrius. I sighed heavily. Tama siya pero ngayon mas gusto kong kumapit muna sa patalim hangga't hindi ko pa nagagawa ang gusto ko. Hangga't wala pa akong sariling katawan.

"If I tell you the whole truth about me, will you trust me?" naghahamong tanong ko sa kanya. Siguro ngayon, kailangan ko munang makuha ang tiwala niya upang mas maging maayos ang paglalakbay namin. Matiim niya akong tinitigan na tila inaarok kung seryoso ba ako sa tanong ko. Saglit siyang nag-isip.

"Depende kung ano ang sasabihin mo sa 'kin. I will still weigh everything," kibit-balikat na saad niya. "Avery, I wanted to trust you but you are trouble," naiiling na dagdag pa niya.

Napangumuso ako dahil sa sinabi niya. Saglit akong nag-isip kung ano ba talaga ang dapat kong gawin ngayon. Saka ko na lang siguro siya poproblemahin kapag naging kaaway ko na siya. I need to get his trust. "Fine. I'll tell you the truth now. Anyway, I also need you to be prepared," seryosong saad ko.

Bumaling ang tingin niya sa 'kin. "Now you're finally opening up," he commented with amusement. I smiled even when I knew that he couldn't see.

"Hindi ko alam kung ilang taon na ba akong wala sa katawan ko kaya ang masasabi ko lang sa 'yo ay ang mga nalalaman ko bago ako umalis sa katawan ko. I'm not even sure on what generation or time I belonged now," saad ko sa kanya.

"Go on. I'm listening. Gusto ko ring malaman kung bakit ba kailangan kong pumunta sa Elfania at kung bakit ka napilitang umalis sa katawan mo. Gusto ko ng mas malalim na dahilan. I don't need a summary. There are times, I'm asking myself if this journey is really worthy to take. Or if you are worthy of my help. Naguguluhan na rin ako kung ano ba talaga itong gulong pinasok ko," mahinang wika niya. Halata sa tinig niya ang pagdududa sa sarili at sa desisyon niya. I nodded and continued.

"I'm not sure if you will be satisfied of my story but you can't go back anymore even when you regret your decision of helping me now. I won't let you back out," mahinang paalala ko sa kanya. He chuckled a bit and shook his head.

"You're always giving me no choice. Simula ng dumating ka sa buhay ko, lahat ng gusto mo, nasusunod. You really have ways to get what you want. You are trouble and a selfish brat," he commented. I laughed with his remarks. He's right. I have my own ways to get what I really want. Humiga siya sa buhangin habang inuunan ang dalawang kamay sa likod ng ulo.

"You can start your side of story now," he added sincerely. "Don't keep me in the dark anymore," makahulugang sambit pa niya. I sighed heavily. Pakiramdam ko, hindi ko na maitatago talaga ang katotohanan mula sa kanya. I needed to open up. I needed him to understand me. He still had the right to know.

"I'm in the dark, as well," kibit-balikat na saad ko. "I was eighteen when my parents are killed. They are on their journey to meet with other elven nation's ruler to seal an agreement for some confidential business but then, they were ambushed. Hindi ko alam ang nangyari. Basta ang alam ko lang, hindi na sila nakaligtas. When they died, a new Empress was crowned to rule Elfania," saad ko.

"And that was you?" kunot-noo at medyo gulat na tanong niya sa 'kin. He looked at me with wonder and amusement at the same time. It's as if his eyes were asking me on how could I possibly rule a Kingdom with my current state. As if he was telling me that I knew nothing about life and ruling. I frowned. I might be young for an elf but I was not that naive.

Marahan akong tumango. "I was crowned as the new Empress. Avery Devon is the name. Kailangan namin ng mamumuno upang hindi maalarma ang ibang kaharian. Ang Elfania ang pinakapundasyon ng lahat ng Elven Kingdoms. Kapag nasira ang pundasyon, masisira at babagsak rin ang ibang kaharian. At nangyari na nga ang kinatatakutan ng lahat dahil hindi nag-aksaya ng panahon ang Asteria upang sugudin ang Elfania. Alam nilang wala akong karanasan sa paghawak ng isang malaking kaharian. Ni hindi ko nga napag-aralan dahil madalas akong tumatanggi sa responsibilidad," paliwanag ko. Malalim akong bumuntong-hininga nang maalala ko ang lahat ng nangyari. Tahimik lang na nakatingin sa 'kin si Zirrius. I could clearly see how he sympathized with me.

"Hindi namin alam na napaghandaan na ng Asteria ang lahat. Hindi rin namin alam na may ilang kaharian na silang nasakop nang palihim. Ginamit nila ang lahat ng maaaring magamit upang pabagsakin ang Elfania. They crushed our defenses. I actually lead the army to fight them but then I was not that knowledgeable. Mas matalino ang Emperor ng Asteria na si Severus," mabigat na pagpapatuloy ko. 

"He said he needs something important from me. Hindi ko alam kung ano. Basta ang alam ko lang, nauubos na ang mga kawal ko. Nasira ang magandang kaharian ng Elfania. Nasira ang buhay ng mga nasasakupan ko dahil sa walang awang si Severus. Nasira ang nagsisilbing pundasyon ng Elven Kingdoms. Everything was in chaos. Everyone was suffering and some were killed. Hindi ko na natagalan ang mga nangyayari. And that's my limit. I made the most reckless decision but I will never regret it. I surrendered even when my army still wanted to fight until they draw their last breaths. They didn't want to back down. They are willing to die together with their remaining dignities. But then, I won't allow that to happen. Ano na lang ang mangyayari kung lahat kami mamamatay? Wala ng lalaban para mabawi ang Elfania. Hindi na talaga kami makakabangon kung mawawala ang lahat," mapait na wika ko.

"That's also the reason why you don't want me dead?" mahinang tanong ni Zirrius. 

I nodded. "Well, yes. I want you to survive to redeem your own kingdom but then, you know, that's only part of the real reason. You know I'm selfish and I want to survive too. I will not allow you to die as long as I'm inside your body," diretsong sagot ko.

He frowned because of my boldness. "That's a real turn off," he said. "I can back out anytime."

I laughed. "You can't because you need me too. I'll continue my story. Nang sumuko ako, natapos ang laban. My people were held captives. I, again, made a reckless decision for the second time around. Huli na para tumakas dahil napapaligiran na ng mga Asterian ang buong kaharian ng Elfania. Ayokong manatili sa katawan ko nang walang ginagawa. Hindi ako makagagawa ng paraan upang bawiin ang Elfania kung pati ako ay mahuhuli. I don't want to be a pawn for their cause. So, I decided to leave my body and my soul wandered on an endless darkness. I don't even know where my recklessness will lead me. I'm not even sure if I'll live or die. But I'm glad, I found some place inside you though. It's not that bad after all," mahina at seryosong saad ko.

"It's bad for me though," nakasimangot na sagot ni Zirrius. "I see. That's why you need to gather allies," saad ni Zirrius na ngayon ay bumangon na at umupo sa buhangin.

"Yes. Powerful allies. I need to gather all the rulers of the Elven Kingdoms. At sana lang, hindi pa sila napapabagsak ni Severus," nag-aalalang saad ko. "Sa totoo lang, hindi ko alam kung paano magsisimula. Hindi pa rin ako sigurado sa lahat ng nangyayari ngayon. I'm also at lost." I was also a bit guilty because I still left the most important part of the story untold. Hindi ko sinabi kay Zirrius kung saang angkan siya nabibilang.

"Pero kung magtagumpay ka naman na makahanap ng malalakas na kakampi, paano naman kung wala na ang sarili mong katawan? Ano na ang mangyayari sa 'yo? Paano kung naagnas na ang katawan mo?" sunud-sunod na tanong niya. I could see how worried he was for my body.

"Natatakot ka na habang buhay na ako sa katawan mo, 'no?" natatawang pang-aasar ko sa kanya. He frowned. "I'm serious," reklamo niya.

"I know, you're always Zirrius," natatawang saad ko. "Sa totoo lang, hindi ko na rin alam kung ano ang nangyari sa katawan ko. Pero sana sinunod ng kanang kamay ko ang mga inutos ko sa kanya. Right now, I can only hope that my body is still intact," kibit-balikat na saad ko.

Malalim na bumuntong-hininga si Zirrius. "You're damn reckless," he commented. I just smiled because I know.

"So what do you think? Can you trust me now?" umaasang tanong ko sa kanya. He looked at me and then sighed. He shook his head with amusement. "Are you asking me to decide right now? You know, trust can't be gain that easily. Not in a blink of an eye." I frowned. Naisahan niya ako.

"Fine. I'll make you suffer on your trainings then," naiinis na saad ko. "Be prepared," ismid ko pa bago ako tumayo at umalis. Narinig ko pa ang mahinang pagtawa niya bago ako nakalayo.

"You're such a child, Avery!" he commented and chuckled. Mas lalo akong sumimangot.

_______________

TO BE CONTINUED...

Dapat kahapon ko ipopost kaso nalaman ko na nareport na naman ung bagong FB na ginawa ko kaya tinamad ako. Waha. Anyways, everyday na akong magsusulat for SB pero hindi ko muna ipopost. So just wait for the meantime. Kapag natuwa ako, saka ako mag-aupdate. Take care everyone. And thanks for being patient as always. :)