I thought this be easier than making an announcement (and I've seen other people do this). This gets rambling but you should expect that from me. Still, if it seems all over the place, I'm sorry. It's sort of like a confession/life update, I have a lot of things to say😂

Also excuse typos and such. It is currently 1am and I haven't edited it. I'm sure with a clearer head I could think of more things to say and whatnot but I chose chaos, sorry🙃

***

I took a hiatus two days ago due to the Roe vs Wade stuff happening, also because I think I just needed a break from Wattpad—or at least writing.

Every time I think about talking about this I feel like I sound ungrateful or whiny but here it goes:

Writing on here is hard when there's little engagement on my work.

Ugh...well I've said it now and I feel like I'm guilt tripping :/

Every time I see little engagement I think it's a me problem....is that weird?

Like: is my writing bad? People don't really care. Should just give up.

(I might be exaggerating a little but you get the point)

I know it's all in my head; people have told me many times that they really like my writing and my plots, etc.

It's just hard, you know? The mind's a powerful tool they say—they also say you're your worst enemy.

I think that's very true in my case.

Especially when I start comparing myself. Another thing I've been doing: I get jealous when I see people who post a book and then an hour later get 100 comments. Or see an Instagram post that get a lot of likes when mine get none. I know this stuff just happens...

But it still really hurts :(

Right now, I'm not sure what to do about my writing slump. I might try and work on my one-shots (funny thing is I struggle with them a lot lol).

Right now, I'm going to do an impromptu poll because it's my book and I can do whatever. Pick from a list of books you'd like to see an update from (don't know when I will get to them, but I will):

•Batman's Daughter (rewrite)

•Midnight Visits

•Sharpened Claws

•Error (only one person reads it and they don't follow me but I'm putting it in to be fair)

•The Fight of My Life

•The Moon

•These Violent Delights

I thought I had a lot of books out to be written but this really puts this into perspective, there aren't many—

Moving on; I have a book I want to put out.

Dark Knight, a plot shop. Here's the cover:

It could be better but it's okay. I was trying to photoshop in India Easley but I think I need actual photo shop for it to work :3

I kind of miss my HP book but honestly I don't think I can bring it back, so I'm going to put it in there (also I deleted the chapters sadly so I think it's better some else writes it) as well as some other things if I feel inclined to.

Also want to bring back my graphic portfolio, made a new cover for that too:

I'm thinking of adding graphic tutorials as well; a way for you all to request something. Specifically, I'd want to talk about GIF banners since I've learned to make those recently and would love to share my knowledge☺️

Also have this in the works👀 If I don't get around to reading Connor's comics, I'll probably put it in my plot shop. First attempt at a comic cover which I've seen everyone make lately:

Speaking of books, I've been thinking about/working on a new WIP from my list of to be published work.

Maybe the first thing I want to publish, so I'm trying to focus on it. Does this premise sound like something interesting??

Like it definitely needs some work but I'm still trying to work out the kinks:

***

20 years ago, Kitanka, a woman known as The Dark Prophet rose to power in the supernatural world, intending on taking over the city of Canto and dividing the creatures into war.

Today, her 19 year old daughter Violet becomes aware of her power when her father and step-father have to flee.

She is put in the care of The Hunters, an organization of creatures that help to protect the world from creatures known as Changelings.

Along her journey to stop her mother, Violent learns more about the world her family came from and discovers her own power as a Magi, coming from a long line of powerful magic users.

***

And that's just the first book. It's a trilogy (it was supposed to be a dulogy but the first and second books had such a big time gap, it felt weird ), with a side book that's one-shots about various characters in that world.

It's very lgbtq+ focused. The MC is aro-ace and (obviously) has two dads (her actual father, Riker, is a Magi—a magic user in this world— and her step-father is a werewolf). Also almost all the cast (the people that Violet takes along for her journey) are also LGBTQ+, but there is one token straight couple just cuz😂

I've got some of the world building figured out although I'm having a hard time trying to figure out why the creatures would go to Earth if they already lived in a magical city anyway but I'm sure I'll figure that out eventually.

If anyone wants to hear more, I could make a second part or something to talk about it more...it'd be better than just my dad😅

Back to Wattpad for a sec: I think I want to bring back my original vampire novels back. Especially since The Cult's protag is similar to Violet (sort of). Stephanie is raised by two dads, her mom is absent, etc.

If anyone missed it: Stephanie Stanford, a vampire, accidentally killed a classmate of hers who made a comment about her dads—Leonard and Jamal— and has to hide it from everyone, including the vampire's current rulers/council (it use to be a monarchy before a coupe happened, which I'll get into in the sequel). Stephanie's mom is a mermaid though it doesn't come up much in the story. The Cult, where the title comes from, is an organization of various creatures lead by a man who is connected to the former monarchy (how or why is a spoiler)

The sequel focuses on Leonard and Jamal in college, as well as the vampire monarchy's fall and then the third book focuses on Stephanie's mom, Caroline.

Anyway, point is: I never finished the first book and it deserves to be finished.

So eventually in the near future I will bring it back.

Back to the point of this post; me giving you all a life update:

I mentioned a bit about my writing but honestly I've mostly been writing these past few days:

For the PJO fans, I'm currently on Heroes of Olympus, book 3: The Mark of Athena. Once all the books are finished, a review in my spam book will be published☺️

I've also been reading a lot of other books, but I will talk about them in my spam as well.

I think once I'm done with the PJO series, I'll move onto the Mortal Instruments books. I got the box set and am lowkey kind of excited.

Maybe it will be terrible, but I find the world/characters really interesting so hopefully that'll save it???😂

If anything goes wrong...well, I still have the show which got me to buy the books in the first place so I will be at peace with that😌

Here's some show things because books weren't the only things I've been consuming: I finished The Summer I Turned Pretty.

I liked it for the most part, but ironically I disliked it once the triangle began in the second to last episode. I'm aware that's the whole point but I didn't like it lol

Even more frustrating, I can't tell if I'm attracted to Conrad or relate to him a little too much...probably both😅

(But hey, at least he's an human being rather than my standard as of late of having video game crushes—)

Also thought about a fic...might still do that. And might make it a series because I can't be stopped😜

(It was just going to be Steven but I might also do Cam—I know, weird choice but The Moon is a Maureen Brown x male!oc book AKA a character who appeared in Shadowhunters and then disappeared by the seventh episode so it's not out of the oridinary for me. Also Conrad...or Taylor...or Nicole??...as a treat for me😊)

If only I could make nice faceclaim covers, that would be the dream :')

The series working title: Letters From Summer...now I'd just need an actual plot...and stop abandoning TV fics all the time🙄

By the way: some people may remember my brief Heartstopper fic Purple Hearts, might bring that back...eventually.

I'm trying to get into The Umbrella Academy (Netflix decided to shut down yesterday so hopefully today will work). The tumblr gifs struck again and make me want to watch a show I've been putting off...I should be mad but honestly I'm very grateful, I need the motivation😂

Although if I get a fic out of it...please stop me😬😬😬

Oh! And a quality of life improvement: my mom's convinced to walk on the treadmill and I want to get back into yoga again (it beats sitting on the couch all day and then complaining about horrible back pain the day after as though my scoliosis doesn't give me enough problems🙄)

Not sure how to end this...today it's June 30th, it's 1am and I keep going to bed late. Publishing this right now before I go to sleep because why not🥰

Earlier, I went to see the To Kill a Mockingbird play, it was really good.

Not sure how it holds up to the book, I don't remember much about it and only vaguely remember the movie.

Also I just found out it's set in the 1930s...blew my mind! I've been thinking my whole life it was set in the 60s, which makes no sense since the book and movie were both made then.

Forgot to mention this earlier, but I've been lowkey worried about college. I just recently uploaded my high school diploma to the website finally. But I haven't registered for any classes so I gotta do that I guess.

I'm worried about making new friends again—it's a community college so I'm only there for two years but still. Also, then if I get into a school in Wales, I'd start the process over again.

Honestly, as long as no one treats me like shit again at the end of the time of us knowing each other, I think I'll be good :')

(It's happened twice now...no I don't know why either. I think people just see that I'm quiet, shy and nice and think they can walk over me like a doormat. Or maybe people think because I'm so easy going that my feelings won't get hurt. Idk)

Speaking of, one of my friends from high school texted me last week asking if I'd want to hang out at the mall next week along with a friend of hers...but since then I haven't heard anything so like...should I text her and see what's going on?? I feel weird doing it after so long but I think I need an explanation, you know??

Anyway, ending this, right now. I need to go to sleep before my eye starts twitching again or I lay awake for a few more hours than I already have.

I will probably keep this up for a while, or turn it to an official book or convert to my spam—something!

Before I forget: sorry to the mutuals who asked for cover requests...in case you were wondering why I seemed to disappear off the grind this is why😅. Also have an apply fic to apply for but all in due time.

Bye. I love you all very much. Thank you for reading this and just,,, listening to me talk about my life❤️

I'll get back to Wattpad soon, eventually, but this is all I have for now

—Bat