private messages

seb

seb

seb

seb

seb

seb
happy six months❤️

arrested development
[10+ participants]

prune
how do i block someone so they can never send me messages ever again

chubby dumpling
ouch??

chubby dumpling
i didn't stay up until 2 am making shrek valentines for this

chad danforth
sebastian

chad danforth
sebastian no

robert frowney jr
it's like he's never spoken to a woman before

lizzie
isn't today your six month anniversary

prune
yup

chubby dumpling
hence the seductive shrek pics

prune
and they say romance is dead

scar jo
seb you fucking moose

tic tac
i mean i thought they were pretty funny

chubby dumpling
thank you rudd comedic genius is so underrated these days

chubby dumpling
btw june i was thinking of getting you this for our anniversary

chubby dumpling

chubby dumpling
batteries sold separately

chubby dumpling
do you love it or do you love it

mack the knife

mack the knife
big mood

chad danforth
i feel as though i'll never be the same after seeing this

prune
that's it

prune
seb you're sexcommunicated

prune
my dungeon is locked down and you won't be plundering it tonight

chubby dumpling
oh that's how we're playing it

chubby dumpling
fine you can't indulge in the bulge

prune
you won't be baking my potato

chubby dumpling
then i won't be launching the meat missile

tommy h
are they talking about sex or food i'm honestly lost

lizzie
sex unfortunately

robert frowney jr
here tommy let me explain sex since i know it's been a while for you

tommy h
oh my god i'm a legal adult leave me alone

crisp evans
you guys just ruined so many foods for me

prune
honestly i'm kind of hungry now

chubby dumpling
hey me too!

chubby dumpling
good thing i happened upon a lovely candlelit picnic on top of lizzie's roof

chubby dumpling
want to join me?

prune
is there lemonade

chubby dumpling
microwaved just for you

prune

chubby dumpling
that's my girl

prune
be right over

mack the knife
i shed a tear

crisp evans
gross stop rubbing your love in my face

tommy h
i love my parents☺️☺️

squawk eye
How to cook spinach?

scar jo
this isn't google jeremy

squawk eye
Sorry!

squawk eye
Happy anniversary kids!

prune
thanks bud😊

chubby dumpling
j get off your phone and pay attention to me and the pasta i made

prune
bye guys i'm going to eat spaghetti and make out with my boyfriend

lizzie
you're not crying i am

AUTHOR'S NOTE: jeremy renner is only 46 but i still use my grandmother's texts as inspiration for his