When I looked over the jukebox and found the ten songs I had pulled for Tim were still the first ten on the machine, shocked rattled me. I absently started Monster Mash to entertain Viv while the moment overtook me. After all these years, Billy hadn't moved them. They were staring back at me. I shook it off and set Twist and Shout, Tutti Frutti, and Rockin' Robin figuring three songs would tire Viv out. I was wrong. I was dangerously close to the end of Rockin' Robin, and Viv was twirling and skipping with no sign of slowing.

"Are boys allowed yet?" Billy asked as he rounded the bottom of the stairs with Jackson in his arms.

"Daddy, swing me!" Viv cried as she hugged his legs.

"Jackson, may I have this dance?" I asked, and he reached his chubby little arms around my neck.

I added Love Potion #9, Hippy Hippy Shake, and Build Me Up Buttercup to the lineup. When I turned around, I found Viv cradled in Billy's arms, swinging to the music.

In life, there are moments when you witness perfection, a quiet moment so beautiful it hurts. This was one of those moments. Billy and Viv were so serene in each other's orbit that everything in the world felt right. My chest swelled with how much I loved Billy and the perfect little family he had created.

Jackson pulled me back to earth when he tugged on my earlobe. I continued to sway him to the music as he rested his head on my shoulder. Before the three songs were over, both Viv and Jackson were asleep on our shoulders. Billy settled Viv on the couch first and then gently took Jackson from my arms and laid him on the sofa as well.

"Dance with me, Lil," Billy quietly spoke as he punched in a familiar number. I didn't need to guess what song he picked; I'm Your Puppet swirled around us as Billy pulled me into his arms.

"Jackson pulls on earlobes. Good thing I never got my ears pierced," I murmured as I rested my head on his shoulder.

"Mmhmm, he's gentle. He's never pulled too hard on Sarah's earrings. He does that when he's tired. It means he's comfortable with you."

As the song wound down, Viv's small voice came from the couch, "you dance more." She sounded like she was still mostly in a dream.

"Yes, ma'am," Billy agreed as he punched in another song, and Pink Thunderbird flared around us.

Billy spun me around the living room, eliciting giggles from Viv and me. He even capped the song with a lift.

"Come on, you," his voice had a tease as he swept Viv up in his arms. "Naptime," he added as he nodded to a passed-out Jackson.

After picking up Jackson, I followed Billy and a cranky Viv up the stairs.

"I can't sleep; I have things to do with Lily," she protested.

"Lily will be here when you wake up, and you can do all the things then," he promised in a calm, low voice.

"Why do I have to take a nap?" Despite her objections, sleep filled her voice.

"Viv, I promise you, one day, you'll look back on these naptimes with envy," I sighed. "I think I'll take a nap as well."

"Mmhmm, family naptime," Billy absently echoed.

Viv didn't put up much of a fight once Billy tucked her into her bed; her eyelids were too heavy to fight. Jackson didn't stir at all the entire time.

I leaned against the wall outside Jackson's room. "It's been an hour and a half, and I'm exhausted," I announce.

"You chose a dance party. Pro-tip, you'll never have more energy than a four-year-old; energy is their superpower." In his pause, he inspected my face. "Nap?"

"Yes!"

"One more dance?" He asked once we were in my room. He shifted through the album box and put on Stand By Me before pulling me back into his orbit. "I love you, Lil."

"I love you too, Billy." My eyelids felt as heavy as Viv's as I swayed in Billy's arms.

"I think this is going to work. You know, Sarah and I can make this work." He let a small amount of confidence mix with hope.

"It'll work. You'll always do what's best for Viv and Jackson; there's no doubt in my mind."

As the song wound down, Billy swooped me in his arms and set me down on the bed.

"Are you leaving?" I said, as he turned toward the door. "You aren't tired?"

He paused at my question. He had been sleeping in my bed every night. This felt no different, but something in his eyes flared before he stifled it and sighed, moving back to the bed. He slipped his shoes and pants off and slid next to me, allowing me to curl into his chest.

"I was afraid I was going to come down to you playing Spice Girls or something," he teased.

"Oh, trust me, it's coming. One day, Viv will tell you what she wants, what she really, really wants."

"Somehow, I've always known that. You know my career will be over if it gets out that my daughter listens to terrible music," he added with a kiss on my forehead.

"Well, you had a good run," I teased.

"You, with the kids, sexy," he murmured in a low voice that penetrated more than my ears.

"What?" I feigned.

"You love them; I can see it. The way you are with Viv."

"Okay, yeah, Viv is pretty awesome."

"Yeah, because she is a mini-you. I'm in so much trouble, slippery slope. It's something to see you with them. How easily you fit."

I could tell where his mind was going; I got it. I had to admit, Billy, the dad, was pretty amazing. "I always knew you'd be the world's second-best dad."

"I believe you mentioned that when you mapped out my life for me. You were pretty damn accurate," a laugh jolted from his chest.

"It's different to see you with them. There's both panic and serenity that flows through you whenever your eyes fall on them."

He let out a laugh. "You just perfectly summed up parenthood."

"I just don't understand how..." I hadn't intended to speak out loud. I truncated my sentence, but the damage was done.

"How what?" He prodded.

"Nothing."

That immediately piqued his full interest. "Lil, how what?" His face was scanning mine.

"How could Sarah leave? I mean, I couldn't imagine not wanting to keep this family whole."

Billy sighed. "It's not fair to put it on Sarah. As you know, a lot goes into a relationship, and adding in kids is even more complicated. My hands aren't clean here."

"But wouldn't she want to fight for this?"

"Lil, she did. We did." His eyes lifted to mine. "We weren't working. I was never comfortable just being out and about. She always has been. She's just better at that. Then, with the kids, she felt like I was locking us all away. And honestly, she's not wrong. I'd rather spend the day painting rocks and looking at worms in the backyard than deal with the possibility of someone approaching me at a park or restaurant. I was stifling her."

"Is it over, Billy? You think you two can't work it out?"

Billy's eyes dipped. "Lil, it's been over for a while. I didn't want to admit it. Honestly, I don't even think we've had sex since Jackson was born."

"What?" Shock rolled through me at his admission.

"It wasn't great. I think the only reason we lasted as long as we did was because of the kids."

"But I mean, there's so much love. Today, with the kids, it was just so warm and cozy; how can that feeling not transfer to... you know..."

"Sex, Lil; the kids aren't around; you can use adult words now."

But when the word 'sex' crossed his lips, it flared something in me I hadn't felt in his presence in over a decade. He didn't seem to notice and just mulled over his thoughts.

"It was nice. There was a closeness that I thought I might have lost. It was nice to feel it again." Billy acknowledged with a sigh.

It was the first time I realized the gravity of what Billy was going through. This wasn't just another break-up; this was a threat to his family, to an entire life he had built. Instinctively, I curled into deeper him.

"I'm sorry you're going through this, Billy." My voice came as a whisper.

"I don't think I'd be making it through without you," he murmured with a kiss on the top of my head.