Long Ways Away

Songs of the chapter:

1. Long Way Down by One Direction

2. While My Guitar Gently Weeps by The Beatles (how Niall feels)

3. Beautiful Excuses by Rixton (attached song; I don't know why, it just sorta reminds me of this story)

4. I've Got A Crush on You by Frank Sinatra (again, how Niall feels)

Any song of the chapter ideas/requests? Comment them here!

It seems as though I fell asleep again, and this time I woke up on my own. Or maybe it was the smell of coffee that I noticed as soon as I was 'awake' (at least, my new version of my brain working). I have no idea if there is anybody in my room, and I hear whispering outside. 

Liam spoke first, "Niall is really freaking out. I mean, we're all upset, but he's crushed." The person who he was talking to replied, "They've only been together for such little time. How could they have formed such a close bond?" this was Louis.

Louis, you twit, because I have loved Niall for years, and we have a special connection that I cannot just explain. Where is Niall? He was here before.

"Where's the poor chap anyways?" Louis asked Liam, as if he were reading my mind. 

"We forced him to go and get some coffee with Harry. It was hard though, we had to promise him to keep an eye on her." I hear him sip from a cup, probably coffee.

"Well, I'll watch her for now, get some rest. It's almost noon and we've all been up since three A.M.," Liam says, as I hear him enter the room. Louis replied, but I can't make out what he says, but he leaves.

Liam sat down on the edge of my bed. "Hey, Rose," he says softly. "So I guess Niall already told you about what happened with your brother. But supposedly the baby's going to get out of the ICU soon." I guess he was trying to make me feel better. But it didn't. What would make me feel better if I'm trapped inside the depths of my own mind?

Liam continued, "For Niall's sake and your own, I hope you wake up soon. We have to leave tomorrow at the latest for Boston, and I have no idea how Niall could manage to leave you here." He pauses. "You have no idea what you've done to that boy. He's going out of his mind, hoping that you will wake up. We all care about you and want you to come out of this coma. Niall wouldn't be able to handle you being here and him being somewhere else." 

By now I don't just want, I need to wake up. Noises from outside come closer, the pat of footsteps approaching the room. "Did she do anything?" Niall asks Liam. I feel Liam stand up from the side of the bed and says, "No, Niall, sorry."

I'm sitting in my brain in a dark corner, hugging my knees to my chest. The room is blank - the walls and floor are concrete painted white. And then my father appears in the center. "Tata?" I wipe my eyes on my sleeve. He opens his arms toward me and I run into him. I pull away and ask him, "What are you doing? Why are you here? Are you okay?"

He laughs heartily, like he used to when he would teach me how to play guitar. I smile sadly at the memory. "I'm here to give you advice," he says simply, his spanish accent still ever strong. He strokes my hair, and I look up at him, and take in his appearance. His hair is dusted with white hair, just like it was before he disappeared, before he died. His face has no wrinkles, and he looks fine, he looks happy. "Cariño, I love you so much, and that's why I'm going to tell you what to do," he tells me. I will listen to him no matter what. "But, Tata, you- you died." He nodded, and pokes my chest, right over my heart, "Yes, but this is me from in here."

"You want to wake up, don't you?" he asks me. "Of course I do! I need to," I tell him.

"Then do whatever it takes - scream in your head, cry, tear yourself apart, do anything." He sighs and says, "I should have fought more. I could have woken up and stayed alive for you, for Mami and Papi, for Michael and your Mama." A tear slid down his cheek.

I shook my head, "Tata, no, you couldn't. He overdosed you. We love you all the same. I love you, te amo."

He put his hands on my shoulders and looked me in the eyes, "Now go and wake up, and be with Niall. You have so much to live for, never lose hope, Rosa, never. Even if you feel like you can't do it, never give up, because if you do, then you won't wake up."

"I will, Tata. How do you know about Niall?"

He chuckles, "I am part of your imagination, your heart. I know everything you do. Goodbye, Rosa," and he dissipates, like fog.

"- No, Niall, we are leaving tomorrow night and that's final. I know you care about her and want to stay, but we are not canceling shows because of this!" I hear someone yell, probably Ella, their manager. Yep, definitely Ella.

"You don't understand! I need to be with her! I need to be there when she wakes up!" He yells back at her. My pulse quickens. The injection must have worn off. 

"We are leaving tomorrow. Don't make a scene out of this!"

"Shut up! You have no idea how it feels to see the person you love more than anything laying on a hospital bed in a coma! I am not leaving until she is ready to go as well! So I don't care if we cancel shows, take money off of my paycheck, hell, kick me out of the band! I'm rich as it already is and I'm going to do anything and everything to make sure Rose is fine!" Niall yells and I hear the click-clack of Ella's heels get farther away. My pulse races, and the monitors go off beeping.

I feel blood pumping behind my eyes, forcing them to open wide. I see Niall rush over to me and he grabs my hands. A tear slips out of my right eye before anything else happens.

I still can't move or speak. Why can't I speak? "Rose, talk to me," he begs, tears streaming down his face. It seems that Harry was in the room before, during the screaming match, and he went out to get the doctor. They both came rushing in, and the doctor pulls a flashlight out and basically blinds me.

I squint and the doctor intakes a sharp breath, "Rose, my name is Dr. Wilder. If you can hear me, blink twice." So I did.

"Good. Did you hear anything or feel anything while you were not awake? Blink twice for yes." I did it, but wanted to tell him, my mind was awake, I couldn't do anything physically.

"Okay, I'm going to explain what is happening to you right now," he checks the I.V. in my wrist, and put my hand back down next to me. Niall is sitting in a chair next to the wall, silently crying, and whispered, "You're awake."

Dr. Wilder continued, "Your body is in shock. You usually get the use of your limbs and speaking in a short while after waking up - which is different for everyone. Some people squeeze a person's hand, or say something, but you got sight and eyes."

I start to feel like it's hard to breath again - only this time, I'm fighting the tubes up my nose. Then I realize, I can breath on my own. I make wheezing noises to try to get Dr. Wilder's attention to it, and he notices.

"Can you breath on your own? Always use two blinks for yes or okay, and keeping your eyes closed for a few seconds for no." I blink twice. He starts to disassemble the tubes and removes them from my nose.

I feel free. I can breath on my own, and blink. I can look around this room. Who ever thought that one could be so grateful for just these simple things that we take for granted?

Dr. Wilder wrote some things down on his clipboard, and said, "If my calculations are correct, you should be getting all of your abilities back before tonight. If that is the case, then we can let you go tomorrow afternoon. But with a lot of medication and you would have to come back in a month for a sleep test." I blink twice to show that it's okay. He nods. "Alright, I will leave you two and let the rest of the people who are in the waiting room for you know. Can they come in?"

I look at Niall, and he says, "Please tell them to give us a few minutes. Thank you so much, sir," he shakes hands with the doctor, making me want to smile. And I can, I feel my lips curling up at the edges.

After the doctor exits and closes the door behind him, Niall comes to sit on the edge of the bed. I take in how he looks. His clothes are a worn out t-shirt and his eyes are puffy and red from so much crying.

"Do you remember me singing to you?" he asks me, holding my hand, trying to warm to. I blink twice, and smile. "You can use your facial muscles it seems," he smiles back at me, so I raise an eyebrow just for the heck of it, and twist my neck. He laughs, and it feels good to hear him laugh instead of sob.

The door opens and in comes Liam first, followed by Harry and Louis. I raise an eyebrow, wondering where the girls were. I swear I could have heard them outside not too long ago. Just as I was about to try and ask, they come bounding through the door. At least, Lottie and Kelsey were.

Lottie is holding a small bouquet of pink roses, and Kelsey has a teddy bear tucked under her arm. Everyone starts talking, and the noise begins to be too much. My ears start ringing, and the noise is drowned out by the ringing noise that won't stop. I scrunch my eyes shut and try to think of happiness, of a song or something to drown it out.

I start to hum to myself without realizing it, it's 'while my guitar gently weeps'. Everyone quiets down immediately. I try to open my mouth to talk but nothing comes out except for a small unidentifiable noise that sounded like it could have come from E.T. the extra-terrestrial. 

"Was that a Beatles song?" Louis asks, and I blink twice. Everyone is staring at me, so I look at Niall. "Oh, the code is that if she blinks twice that means yes, and if she closes her eyes for longer then it's no." So I blink twice again. Louis nods. Lottie squeezes by everyone to put the flowers on the side table.

I stare off into space, lost in thought, thinking about how I 'talked' to my father in my head. Was he a figment of my imagination? Or was it some Harry Potter shit like when Dumbledore visits Harry as he is dying? I have no idea, but I want to know. I want to get answers. But if I try to tell anyone, they'll just think I'm mental and send me back to therapy.

I must have been doing that for a while, because Niall asked me, "You okay?" I nod, thankful to be able to move my head. 

People ask me question, I blink sometimes, nod, et cetera. Soon enough, everybody clears out, leaving me with Niall again.

After a long silence of staring at his lap, he spoke, "I thought I was going to lose you."

I still could not say anything, so I stayed silent, staring at him intently. He raises his gaze to me and scoots closer to me upper body, which was propped up by pillows. He leans toward me and softly presses his lips against mine. He quickly pulls back away, and sits back on the edge of my bed. He put my hand in his lap, and I feel his soft fingers stroke my frozen hand.

Then my arm and hand started convulsing. My left arm was shaking uncontrollably, while Niall asked if he should get the doctor. I shook my head, no, because he told me this might happen. I leaned back against the pillows and used all of my strength to make my arm stop moving.

My willpower was finally working. After that, I could use both of my arms. This whole recovery is like a miracle, even if the coma was only 12 hours, this was still amazing.

Surprise! Decided to upload this as well!

all the love,

Juliet