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Something for school that I need feedback of

The night air holds its breath as we tiptoe through the darkness. All I have on is my dinosaur onesie, but I’m not too cold. I can’t hear a single sound, except for the soft patter of three pairs of slippers, rustling the grass. Megan and Olivia don’t have much on either. They’re also wearing their onesies – a rabbit and a cat.

Even though we seem completely unperturbed, inside, my heart is racing fast enough to burst. It’s kinda stupid, really. I’m already a teenager, and yet I’m still scared by some silly old ghost story. That’s what’s different between us three. Although Megan and Olivia aren’t afraid of anything, I still get nightmares from the worst ghost story in the world. For example, the one that’s going around school right around this time of year.

They say that only three years ago, there was a girl who was drowned in the river by two other students. Apparently, if you go down there at the darkest hour of the night on the same date she died, she’ll drag you down there with her. Everyone just laughed. I was terrified.

So naturally, we’re going to see if that’s true.

I’m still not sure why I agreed to this. The others said it was perfectly safe, and that they were only taking me down there to stop me from being such a wuss. But what if it turns out to be true, and we’re never heard of again? What if we die? I want to turn back, but it’s too late. It’s all or nothing, and I’ve chosen the wrong one. I can’t give up now.

“We’re here,” Olivia says suddenly, and I realise that we’re already at the river. I can’t even look at it, but a hand pushes me forward.

“Come on, Angie. There’s nothing down there,” Megan tells me. I’m not so sure. Somehow, though, I pluck up the courage to look into the rushing water.

There’s nothing. Absolutely nothing. All I can see is my own reflection, staring back at me. I’m surprised at how relieved I am. There isn’t a ghost haunting the river. I’ll be able to sleep all right tonight after all.

“Now let’s go back,” Olivia says. “It’s way past lights out, and if we’re caught wandering around outside at ridiculous o’clock, then it’ll be hell for us.”

“What time is it, actually?” I say, and I turn to Megan, her face cast in shadow. She’s the only one of us who has a watch. She checks it lazily.

“It’s nearly twelve,” she says. “Why?”

“It isn’t the darkest hour yet,” I panic. “It might still be true!”

Olivia rolls her eyes – well, the one eye that isn’t covered by her pale brown hair. “Gimme a break, Ange. Ghosts don’t exist.”

“Come on! We’ll get caught!” Megan hisses, and I look back at the river one last time before obliging. There’s still fear in my heart. One side of me is laughing at how scared I am, but the bigger side is petrified.

“Wait,” comes a voice, and I nearly jump out of my skin. I look around and almost scream when I see a barefoot young girl running towards us, her hair so blonde it’s almost white. Her uniform is faded, with only the faintest traces of colour showing through the greyed material. But her eyes are full of colour: deep blue, like the sea.

I can’t even say anything but a muffled, “W-who whaaaaa?”

“I got lost,” the girl says, and bursts into tears. I’m slightly taken aback by this, but Megan seems to know exactly what to do. She walks over to the girl, and crouches down beside her, stroking her tangled hair.

“Shh, shh, it’s okay,” she whispers. “What’s your name?”

The girl sniffles, wiping her nose with the back of her hand. It takes a long while to calm down, but no-one protests. Eventually, her crying dies down and she speaks. “C-Charlotte.”

“Okay, Charlotte, how old are you?” Megan says gently.

“Eleven.”

Megan looks at us, concern on her face. “You guys go ahead. I’ll take care of her. It would be unfair for you two to get punished because I kept you back. If anyone asks, I’ll say I was on my own, okay?”

“Are you sure?” I say hesitantly, but I notice Charlotte stiffen visibly when she hears my voice. “Well, someone doesn’t like me,” I mutter to Olivia, who stifles a giggle.

“Yeah, it’s fine. I’ll probably be along soon anyway. I’ll take her back to her house, then get back to house.”

“Whatever you say,” Olivia says uncertainly, but Megan has turned her attention back to Charlotte. She shrugs. “Let’s go, I guess.”

We manage to slip back into house without being spotted, and the teachers are none the wiser as we snuggle into bed. Although the room feels empty without Megan keeping up the usual chatter, I’m too tired to talk. I don’t have time to be scared of ghosts before I drift off into sleep.

~o~O~o~

When I wake up, Megan’s already brushing her hair. “You didn’t drown!” I say a little too loudly, and she laughs.

“I’m fine. The teachers didn’t even notice me. Turned out Charlotte was Miss Brouwer’s daughter, and after ringing the doorbell I left her to be reunited with her mum. Don’t want to interrupt an intimate moment.”

“Yeah,” I say, and we both laugh. Soon Olivia’s awake and we’re heading off to have breakfast. Miss Brouwer’s taking registration, so we take the opportunity to talk to her.

“Is your daughter okay?” Megan asks with a smile. Miss Brouwer freezes.

“My daughter?”

“Well… yeah,” I say, puzzled.

“I don’t have a daughter. Well, not anymore.”

“What?” We can’t move. Can’t breathe.

“She went missing a couple years ago, presumed dead… I’ll always miss my little Charlotte.”

All right guys, this was a story I had to do for school. For a contest. And I want to win said contest. So give me your feedback! Be as harsh and nitpicky as you like. I'll need it. Heck, I give you the permission to be downright MEAN with your comments. As long as you're still telling me what you're being mean about, of course...

...And they never said you couldn't ask your internet friends to help you with your story.

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