Epilogue

6 months later

“Mahal!” Rigo’s voice cut through the noise of the blender that Fatima was holding down with her might. Inilagay niya kasi ang kalabasa na niluto niya kanina para i-blend at maging puree. She also added a little bit of milk to make it softer and more manageable to eat.

“O? May result na ba?” She answered without looking at him. She needed this to be in perfect consistency dahil ayaw niyang masamid ang anak. She was starting solids today and Fatima crossed her fingers that she’d be less of a picky eater.

“Wala pa pero tignan mo ‘tong anak mo,” he paused to bend down on Clementine, who was sitting on his lap. She can already sit! Nasa tapat sila ng desk ni Rigo habang nakabukas ang laptop nito at naghihintay ng resulta ng recent board exams na kinuha niya. “Nangangagat kahit wala pa namang gaanong ngipin. Puro gilagid.” Rigo let out a bark of laughter when Clementine reached for his forearm, bending her head forward as far as it would let her, to bite his arm that was supporting her so she wouldn’t fall off of his lap.

Two of her teeth at the bottom had already peeked out of her gum line, pero mostly ay hindi pa lumalabas. But every night she would fuss and cry because her gums were itchy and painful, and even if the teething rollers were helping, hirap pa rin itong matulog dahil iyak nang iyak.

“Wipe her chin. Puno na ng laway. Pati arm mo.” Kinuha ni Rigo ang towel sa desk niya para dahan dahang punasan ito, and when she looked up at him, she babbled happily, releasing small and excited ‘aaaa’s whenever they were talking to her.

“Ako talaga malapit ka nang gigilan, diday.” He picked her body up and lifted her in the air, and Fatima watched her little darling giggle and squirm, especially when Rigo brought her down to kiss her cheeks. Paulit-ulit niya itong ginawa hanggang mapagod na sa katatawa ang anak niya at nagsimula nang mangilid ang luha.

“Rigo, ibaba mo na. Baka nalulula na. Iiyak na naman ‘yan, sige.” She slapped Rigo’s arm before she placed the bowl of pumpkin puree on the desk. “And kakain na siya.”

Nang maayos itong maiupo ni Rigo ulit, Fatima reached to put on a bib on her before picking up the bowl and taking a small scoop of the puree. “Say ah, Clemie.” She opened her mouth in a big ‘o’ for her daughter to follow, and Clementine innocently copied the move, all the while her eyes were wide with anticipation as she moved the spoon closer to her mouth.

“Papasok na airplane, diday!”

Nang matikman nito ang nasa kutsara, sumilay ang ngiti sa mga labi nito. She made multiple happy kicks while her small hand reached for the spoon that Fatima was still holding before shoving it in her mouth clumsily before she could pull it away. “Anak naman! Ito na, bibigyan pa kita.”

“Never tell your next move, ‘no, diday? Sarap ba? Paglutuan kita ng iba next time. Gusto mo mansanas? Or kamote?”

She babbled and looked up at Rigo, happy. Hindi man nito naiintindihan ang sinasabi ni Rigo, alam niyang masaya ang anak niya kapag nakikita ito.

Fatima shifted her gaze to Rigo and caught him already looking at her. She raised her brow at him questioningly. “What?”

“You’re a good mom kay Clemie.”

Fatima’s hand froze, registering what he just said. Her heart hammered with gratitude because it was the first time someone ever told her that, and it came from someone who saw her struggle in the last couple of months. Kinailangan niyang lumipat ng trabaho dahil hindi siya pinagbigyan nang mag-request siya na hybrid ang set up, so she had to look for another job, finding it difficult to combed through and find ones that could offer her a WFH and on-site set up.

All the while, she was taking care of Clementine full-time. At kahit nag-o-offer ang nanay niya na bantayan ito sa umaga, hindi niya makayanan na iwan ito nang matagal. Her mom guilt was eating her alive especially now that Clementine was extra sensitive due to her teething stage. Ayaw nitong mawalay sa kanya at laging gusto na karga niya. She can’t afford a caretaker just yet, and even if she asked for it from Jacob, hindi pa rin niya alam kung kaya niyang iwan ang anak sa ibang tao.

Meanwhile, Rigo was still working full-time and dividing his finances to support them and his family. Pinag-iipunan nitong maipaayos ang talyer nila at magdagdag ng tao para mas malaki ang kitain ng mga magulang niya. That way, they’d have a source of income.

So even though Jacob shouldered most of Clementine’s expenses—lahat ng pangangailangan nito ay siya ang nagbibigay—she still needed a stable job to keep the lights on in their apartment.

“Thank you,” she muttered and bent her head down. She didn’t want to see how that one phrase almost erased the burden that weighed heavily on her shoulders. Her mind was like a fragmented glass, existing in different places—her job, her mother, Rigo, Jacob, and Clementine—to keep everything the way they are. Her well-being came last among the load of worries she had.

Rigo’s fingers eased around her neck, his fingers resting just below her ear, before he tilted her face up. Mataman nitong tinignan ang mga mata niya, his eyes speaking what he can’t form through words. “Seryoso ako do’n, mahal. Sa ilang buwan nating magkasama, ‘di ko naramdaman na nagkulang ka sa pag-aalaga sa kanya. Kahit na mahirap. Kahit na nakakapagod. Minsan nakikita ko nakakatulog ka na habang pinapakain mo siya.”

“Ayaw kasing magpababa ng batang ‘to.” Fatima squeezed her daughter’s arm playfully. It’s okay, though. Libreng gigil naman siya lalo na pag tulog na ito.

“And inaalagaan mo rin ako.” Rigo’s lips curved in a pretty smile. One that she enjoys seeing painted on his face lalo na kapag gumigising ito sa tabi niya. Halos ayaw na niyang tumayo sa kama.

Fatima couldn’t help but scoff. “You mean you take care of me.” Ngumiti ito. It was true. He did take care of her more than she did. Araw araw itong nagluluto para sa kanila, never once complaining. Araw araw din ito gumigising sa madaling araw kasabay niya para asikasuhin si Clementine. She once asked him why he was doing all this, in between her sleepy state, and he simply said that they were partners, and that meant not just sharing their hearts to each other, but also the things that came with loving the other person.

“I love cooking for you and Clemie. Tsaka masasayang mga recipe ng nanay ko kung ‘di ko lulutuin.” Rigo said with a smile. But Fatima knew that it was because he loves her and her daughter.

Fatima slowly placed the bowl on the desk, far from Clemie’s reach, and leaned it to kiss him, but before their lips could touch, Rigo’s phone pinged loudly, indicating a text message that came in. Mabilis nitong tignan ang phone niya, and before he could place it back down, nakita na ni Fatima ang pamilyar na pangalan ni Amara.

“O, bago ka mag-react, sa group chat siya nag-message, mahal.”

“Group chat pero minention ka.” She leaned back and crossed her legs, but not before catching Rigo’s eyes as it went down to her thighs. Hinampas niya ang braso nito. “Tignan mo ‘to.”

Kinuha ulit nito ang phone sa desk bago inabot sa kanya. “Ikaw na magbukas. Tignan mo message niya.” Nang hindi niya tanggapin, Rigo reached for her palm to gently open it before placing his phone. “I promise, mga group chat lang ‘yan, close friends, at sa ‘tin.”

Fatima pressed the number on the lockscreen, remembering how many times he told her what his passcode was kahit wala naman siyang balak pakialaman ang phone nito. She didn’t have to scroll down dahil ang recent message lang ay ang group nilang tatlo nina Amara at Jachin, na may pangalan pa ng kung anong project nila nung senior year. Amara only said congratulations in advance, and most of the exchanges were between him and Jachin.

Fatima glanced at him, her cheeks heating. Okay, maybe she was overreacting. Rigo always managed to pull this ugly, jealous part of her. “Nag-uusap kayo palagi?”

“No,” he said with a shake of his head. “Busy din ‘yon sa pagkakaalam ko. Balak yata mag-masters. Minsan lang din namin ginagamit ‘yang gc, mostly si Jachin lang nangungulit.”

“Okay,” she nodded and handed him his phone back.

Kumurap ang mga mata nito bago sumilay ang ngiti. “‘Di ka na nagseselos?” he asked, teasingly. “Miss Selosa.” He poked the side of her stomach, making her squirm, before fully digging his fingers to tickle her.

“Rigo, stop! Baka mabitawan mo si Clemie!” she tried to get out of his hold using her daughter, pero parang walang pakialam ito sa kanila dahil busy itong sipsipin ang daliri nito, but when she heard her name, a gummy grin spread across her face.

“And hindi ako nagseselos!” she defended herself. Rigo rolled his eyes playfully. “Bakit ako magseselos kung ako katabi mo sa kama araw araw? At sa ‘kin ka umuuwi?”

Rigo sucked in a breath between his teeth and said, his eyes disappearing from the shit-eating grin, “Grabe naman, madam. Kinilig ako.” His hand went to her thigh and squeezed it, still smiling. “Don’t worry, sa ‘yo lang ako uuwi. Ikaw lang tatabihan ko sa kama.”

She kept her eyes on him, waiting until he bent his head a little, and finally captured her lips between his, nibbling and sucking until they were both out of breath. Natigil lang sila nang tumawa ang anak niya at muling tumunog ang phone ni Rigo. This time, notifications flooded his screen before he could even open it. Sunod sunod ang pasok ng messages, and it even rang when Jachin’s phone call cut through the long line of texts.

“Shit, may result na yata,” Rigo clicked on his laptop that was on idle mode, and just like him, Fatima’s heart was hammering inside her chest as he clicked on the official site. Alam naman niyang ginawa nito ang lahat, cramming review in between his job and personal life. Rigo turned to her and smiled a little.

“I’m proud of you,” she said before placing a kiss on his cheek. “Tignan na natin ang result.”

Rigo’s phone didn’t stop pinging and Fatima understood why. Her eyes widened as soon as she saw it because he wasn’t just on the list. His name was included in the top 10 examinees. “Oh my God, Rigo!” she cried, her face breaking into a huge smile. Clementine jolted in surprise while still sitting on Rigo’s lap at palipat-lipat ang tingin nito sa kanilang dalawa.

“What the fu—” agad na tinakpan ni Fatima ang bibig nito bago makapag-mura dahil kalong pa rin nito si Clemie.

“Rigo!”

He pulled her up at inayos ng posisyon si Clementine sa braso niya. “TOP 5?! SERYOSO BA?!” he asked her in his frantic state, pero hindi nito binibitawan ang anak niya. “Diday, top 5 ako!” Rigo lifted her small arm, throwing it up in the air. She giggled happily and then wrapped her tiny arms around Rigo’s neck.

“Oh my God. Seriously, Rigo? Kunyari ka pang hirap na hirap!” she punched his chest playfully.

“Aba, mahirap naman talaga! Nalusaw natitirang braincells ko. Advantage ko lang kahit paano kasi nag-ge-gain na ako ng experience sa trabaho.”

Napangiti si Fatima nang paulit ulit nitong tignan ang screen ng laptop niya, as if the result would change or that somehow he was dreaming. Sinampal sampal pa nito ang sarili sa pisngi, kaya naman agad na napatingin ang anak niya rito, her eyebrows stitched together in confusion and slight concern.

Hinila niya ang braso nito, forcing him to straighten up from leaning over his laptop, and snaked her arms around his waist. Nasa gitna nila si Clementine habang nakayakap siya kay Rigo. “I’m proud of you. Sobra.” She took a deep breath, inhaled his scent, and leaned her head on his shoulder. “Thank you for doing everything for us.”

Fatima felt his lips on the side of her head. “I love you.” He kissed her deeply and rubbed his cheek against her hair. “Tutuparin ko mga pangarap natin and it starts with this.”

She looked up. “Marami ka bang pangarap para sa ‘tin?”

“Of course,” he grinned and then lifted his hand, the one that wasn’t holding Clemie to enumerate. “Pinag-iipunan ko first birthday ni Diday. Pinag-iipunan ko pag nagsimula na siyang mag-aral. Pinag-iipunan ko kasi gusto kong lumabas tayo ng bansa. All that.”

Fatima’s heart soared in her chest with how much love she had for him and him only. Hindi niya alam kung bakit sinubukan niya pang magmahal ng iba, because this was the love that she had always longed for, and this was the person that she had always wanted to someday build a future with.

#smdysnwp