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Chapter XIV: Stress

(L/N)'s father was a tall man, relatively thin, but not in a way that would describe him as feeble. He had a decent amount of muscle, though his stomach was just starting to show signs of a slower metabolism. His mother in comparison, was shorter than most women, with beautiful, long cropped hair that framed her heart shaped face. At least, this is what (L/N) thought his parents looked like. Honestly, he couldn't remember. He couldn't even remember a time when he could remember. They say that when you lose someone, the first thing you forget about them is their voice. But the sounds of their screams had been burned into (L/N)'s memory in a way that marked his soul.

It had been nearly twelve years since that night. Since he'd promised to himself that he would never again open his eyes. He'd long since forgotten what the sky looked like. What the world looked like. Now though, a single vision replayed behind his closed eyes. Starving for any form of sight, his brain obsessed over the last thing he'd seen, playing it back over and over until he could accurately describe what it looked like for skin to melt and boil. He knew what is looked like for muscle to vaporize, for blood to evaporate, and for bone to burn to ash to burn to nothing. He remembered what it looked like for that Nomu to die, so he knew what it looked like when his parents died.

"Are you paying attention?"

The sound of Ectoplasm's disapproving voice pulled (L/N) from his head until he became aware of the sound of explosions and electricity surrounding him as his classmates worked hard to create and perfect their ultimate moves.

"Sorry, I'm just... distracted."

"Try to focus. This is important." Ectoplasm reprimanded. "Now, what do you have in mind for your ultimate move?"

"Uh, I don't..." (L/N) trailed off.

"I see." Ectoplasm said disapprovingly. "Perhaps it would be helpful to review what traits we're looking for when talking about the term. An ultimate move should be something that..."

"That gives you an edge and ensures you win against your opponent, yeah, I know."

"Then show me."

(L/N) took a deep breath as he tried to steady himself, but the image of burning flesh wouldn't leave him.

"I can't." He choked.

"If you're having trouble thinking of something..."

"It's not that." (L/N) shook his head. "I just, I can't..."

"Hey there! You mind if I share something with young (L/N)?"

The two turned to see a frail All Might, or rather Toshinori Yagi, walking up the path towards the pillar of cement they were standing on, waving with his left arm as his right was still confined to its sling.

"Not at all." Ectoplasm stepped aside so All Might could speak with (L/N) face to face.

"So, you're having trouble coming up with an ultimate move." Yagi said plainly. "No need to get so distressed. Why don't we take a seat."

Ectoplasm's clone disappeared so he could focus better on the others as Yagi and (L/N) sat down. Their legs dangled off the edge of the cement column as they looked out upon the rest of Class 1A working hard to develop what would one day become their signature moves.

"I heard about what happened at the training camp." Yagi said. "That was a very brave thing you did. I can only imagine how difficult it must have been for you."

"I didn't do more than anyone else." (L/N) replied.

"Maybe. Maybe not. But I wasn't referring to you protecting your classmates, though that was very admirable as well." All Might leaned forward and rested his arm across his lap. "In today's world, where the fight between heroes and villains is so publicized, it's the harshest battles that are often overlooked. Battles against our own inner demons, and you've got more of those than most veteran heroes."

"What are you saying?"

"What I'm saying is that life, especially the life of a hero, is a constant war. But it's a war we have to fight, because if we don't, evil wins. That's why it's important to have as many tools to win that war as possible. The good news is, you've got more than most." Pushing himself to his feet, Yagi reached down and offered (L/N) a hand up. "Listen up kid, you've got a powerful quirk. But what gives you the edge is just how versatile it is. So think of all the different ways you could use your power that will help you reach victory."

"But I still can't fully control my quirk." (L/N) said. "Even with all the extra training, I just... I'm scared of hurting someone. It feels like... like..."

"Like I'm living in a world made of glass." Yagi finished. "And that one mistake will end up breaking something. Breaking someone."

(L/N) turned to him in surprise. "How did you...?"

"Come on, kid, I could level a building if I sneezed too hard. What do you think would happen if All Might was constantly operating at one-hundred percent power?" Yagi asked. "You and I, we've been cursed with the knowledge of just how fragile this world really is. Which just means we know how much it needs us to protect it. How much it needs us to fight for it."

"How do we do that without breaking it ourselves?"

"Well, control and restraint are part of it." Yagi answered. "And those are things you learn through practice. For now, you need to sharpen those tools I was talking about."

"I don't understand." (L/N) said slowly. "You were just saying learning control and restraint took time."

"They do." Yagi nodded.

"Then how am I supposed to create an ultimate move if I still haven't mastered either of those things?"

"You're forgetting the second thing I told you: versatility. Control and restraint are just two of the tools at your disposal. And notice I'm saying 'tools', and not 'weapons'."

"I-I still don't understand what you're saying."

"What I'm saying, young (L/N), is that you need to learn to pick the right tool for the job. Don't try to pound a nail with wire cutters."

"I don't..."

"Come on, use that head on your shoulders." Yagi said, tapping his forefinger on (L/N)'s forehead. "If you don't know how to use an axe, you shouldn't try cutting down trees. So, if you can't fight without risking injuring someone..."

"Then I shouldn't fight." (L/N) said as realization dawned upon him. "I should focus on protecting people instead."

"There you go, kid."

"Thank you, All Might. I think I understand."

"Don't mention it." Yagi waved off as he walked off to help the other students. "And hey, don't forget to keep sharpening that axe." He said seriously. "Because one day, you're going to need it."

[My Hero Academia]

"Precision and duress are inversely proportionate to each other." Ectoplasm told him the next day as they set back to work developing their ultimate moves. "We've learned through your supplemental training that your hard light constructs are nearly indestructible." He said as the hardened light of (L/N)'s barrier rippled before them. "However, we've noticed that as different stressors are elevated, your constructs become increasingly fragile and brittle. We should therefore begin working at a state of low duress, so your precision is at its maximum, and slowly elevate stress. This will help improve your threshold to these stressors while simultaneously raising the base line for your precision."

Ectoplasm had (L/N) partner off with Bakugou, much to both young heroes' chagrin, to test the power of Bakugou's AP Shot against the durability of (L/N)'s bulwark.

"Generally speaking, stressors fall into four different categories. Physical stress will likely be the most common form of stress you will encounter as a hero." He said over the sound of Bakugou's explosive attack. "This type of stress can come in many different forms, such as noise, fatigue, and opposing force."

Bakugou grinned with satisfaction at the knowledge that his attack had managed to break through (L/N)'s defenses, leaving the other young man sweating and exhausted.

"That's why it's important to train in a controlled environment, where these factors can be controlled and gradually raised until you are able to capably handle the unpredictable nature of a real fight."

Breathing deeply, (L/N) focused on the feeling of his body absorbing the solar energy from the rays of light shining down through the gym's glass ceiling. A dim light surrounded his body, growing more and more intense with every breath he took. As always, Bakugou's AP Shot rang through Training Hall Gamma with the intensity of an artillery shell, but this time when the smoke settled, (L/N)'s barrier was still intact.

"Still, it's important to understand and recognize other factors that can lead to stress." Ectoplasm advised as Vlad King arrived with Class 1B. "Psychospiritual stress stems from conflicts relating to one's moral compass and core beliefs. There is also psychological and psychosocial distress. This can be caused due to emotional turmoil, such as depression, self-loathing, and feelings of guilt..."

The familiar sound of Kendo's voice caused (L/N)'s ears to prick and his barrier flickered and faded from existence.

"... or difficulties stemming from relationships, like the loss of loved ones, isolation, and feelings of abandonment."

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