“What?” Miss Jane screeched on the phone in the middle of the class. Nobody talked so they could eavesdrop on her. I was finishing the exercise she gave us then nearly jumped when she screeched again. “Okay, I’ll be there as soon as I’m finish with work. I’m sorry for your loss. Goodbye, Susan.” She flipped her phone shut and continued teaching as if nothing happened.

            I wondered who Susan was. Must be her relative or her friend. When Miss Jane was about to leave the class, she called me.

            I was shocked. I thought I did something wrong. This same feeling reminded me of the time Mrs. Rosalinda called me and told me that I won a ticket to Australia. This time, I didn’t join any competition in Australia.

            The class was noisy when Miss Jane left the class, stopped at a distance from my class so no one would be able to hear us. I followed her.

            “Do you know who I was speaking to just now on the phone?” she asked.

            “Susan?” I guessed.

            “Susan Fitzgerald. Jamie’s mum.”

            Her answer made me a statue. What happened to Jamie? That was the first question that crossed my mind as soon as I heard her name. She has been missing for almost two weeks and nobody remembered her except for me and her close friends.

            It took me some time to find my voice again. “What about Jamie’s mum?”

            “I think you ought to know because I’ve seen you so close to her. The police found her remains near the forest.”

            Remains. I’m sorry for your loss, Miss Jane said earlier before she hung up. This means she was dead. Near the forest. Jamie. All the memory of her was in my head. The first day in my Australian school. The girl who sat next to me and drew Japanese comic before she disappeared. She invited me with Maryanne and Bibiana to The Curve.

            “I’m so sorry,” Miss Jane whispered as she hugged me. My whole body was shaking and my hands were trembling. Sobs burst through my chest. I hold on to the pillar to support my weigh just in case if I was going to lose my balance. I didn’t realize I was crying until I tasted salt in my mouth. She kept assuring me so I will be calm.

            When I cried until no tears came out, she said, “Susan told me to tell you that Jamie’s funeral is this coming Wednesday. You should tell Jamie’s close friends about it, okay?”

            I nodded in reply and went to the class. I wanted to ask her how did Jamie die but I was too weak to ask. No one asked me what happened so I didn’t tell anyone. During recess, I told Maryanne and Bibiana about Jamie’s death. They burst into tears right away.

            After school, Sam asked me why I was very sad today at the stable.

            “I found out that the person sitting next to me was murdered.”

            “I’m sorry. It must have been hard for you,” Sam said. “Look, after Alice has gone mad, we have been spending so much money on Alice’s medical needs. I think it was time to sell one of our best horses.”

            “You mean Red?”

            “I’m sorry.”

            I sighed in relief. “It’s time to sell him off after all because I didn’t even ride him for a very long time. He deserves to do something better than eating hay in the stable everyday.”

            “Excellent. This millionaire wants Red for ten thousand dollars. What do you think?”

            My jaw dropped. “Ten thousand dollars? Isn’t that too expensive?”

            Sam rolled his eyes. “Do you think horses fall out of the sky? Horses are very expensive nowadays. Five thousand is the usual price. Sixteen million is what you are supposed to call expensive. Guess how many horses Alice sold last year?”

            “Ten?”

            “Seven. That means seventy thousand dollars is in her account.”

            Wow, I couldn’t believe Alice was rich. She could have sent Val to an international school.

            “Try to say something in French. I never thought you were French until you told me so.” I brought up a topic so we wouldn’t waste our time to do nothing.

            “It took me awhile to get used in other accent. For example, English. I went to England once, before I met Adam. There was a good gentleman who taught me to speak British English.”

            “Say some words.”

            “What a spectacular match!”

            I wrinkled my nose to cover my laugh. “That’s not fair! You can pick up that accent from sports channel or something.”

            “All right, you asked for French, right? If I talk to you in French, I would look dumb because you didn’t understand what I was trying to say and I will feel like I’m talking to myself instead.”

            “I don’t care.”

            He sighed and changed the topic. “I’m going to take the day off for today. What do you want to do?” Sam asked.

            “Really? Are you sure? You never ask for a day off.”

            “I think it’s time to. Come on.”

            He took my hand and ran to the forest. I tried to stop him but he was too strong.

            “Aren’t you going to tell the others that you’re not working today?” I wondered.

            “I am. Oh, I’m sorry. I forgot to tell you how we communicate. See, even if I’m a tiger, the others can listen to me in either human or tiger form. It’s like a secret silent language. Sometimes we can talk to wolves but we usually avoid them.”

            “So, if I’m a tiger, I want to tell you something, all I have to do is talk? It’s not like French or Spanish?”

            “We use only one language, French so everyone can understand except for the wolves. Wolves sometimes speak in other language so sometimes we will just stare them like they’re dumb.”

            “Where are we going?”

            He didn’t answer me. I tried to guess where he was going to take me. I never tested guessing with my vision before . . .

            I closed my eyes and concentrated. The forest was blurry as I was flying through it. Finally, there was a house. I recognized this house.

            “Why are you taking me to your house?”

            He stopped walking and faced me. “How did you know that?”

            “Lucky guess,” I lied and shrugged like it was no big deal.

            He continued walking and then shifted into a tiger. I didn’t remember when I sat on his back. He ran through the forest, so fast that I had to close my eyes. When I felt the wind blowing my hair, I felt freedom. My fingers locked tightly around his neck so I won’t fall off. Sam was warm and furry under my hands.

            A few seconds later, I opened my eyes and saw Sam’s house. I got down from Sam, walking towards the house.

            “The idea will make you smile again after your grief for your loss,” Sam stated in his human form. He ran and pulled me towards the house. Someone opened the door for us. I recognized Daniel who was holding a violin.

            “Are you ready to have some fun, Ms. Rhys-Deaux?” Daniel grinned at me. He started to play the violin. It wasn’t classical. It sounded more like country music. This song reminded me of the olden days; years ago people dance and sing in the pub along to this type of song. Or people recently got their pay and they were so happy and drunk. Another guy, I didn’t know his name, joined Daniel with his cello. Sam took his harmonica out and played with them. I couldn’t stop laughing and smiling. Someone took my hand and started dancing with me, teaching me how to dance an old dance. I just followed the moves he taught. A pair of boys, who I assume are twins because they look alike, dancing together in circles as if they were in a ballroom.

            I laughed out loud when they argued at each other playfully and made dirty jokes. Sam cut in to dance with me for a short moment.

            “So everyone’s off today?” I asked him, glancing around the tigers that were having fun.

            “Let’s just say, I have to cut down their bonus for this.”

            The twins moaned when they heard Sam. “No,” they said together.

            Sam chuckled as I laughed. We spent the rest of the day dancing in his house.

            “Stay with Alice, okay? I have to attend the funeral,” I told Val. She nodded. I was wearing dark clothes waiting for Bibiana’s parents to pick me up. I didn’t want to ruin my dress by riding my bike there. Poor Jamie’s parents. Now that their only child was gone, I wondered what they will do to move on.

            “I need you to do me a favor,” Val asked me. I came out of the bathroom and faced her. She was holding a bouquet of flowers. “I need you to leave this on Gran’s gravestone. Catherine Rhys-Deaux was her full name.”

            She gave me the flowers and went downstairs to feed Alice for lunch. Her eating habit had improved though we still had to feed her. She sometimes watched some TV, which was a faster development than before. It took Gran at least six months for Alice to do other than stare at the portrait.

            I heard a honk outside. It must be Bibiana’s parents’ car, a Toyota. Bibiana was wearing a dark dress. Her eyes were watery as she was trying to stop herself from crying, I could tell.

            We were at the graveyard in less than five minutes. Bibiana’s dad told us to go first because he wanted to look for a parking space available. It wasn’t hard to look for the funeral. Many people, including Maryanne were already there. We were just in time to hear Maryanne giving a poem for Jamie:

I did not die

Do not stand at my grave and weep;
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush

I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there, I did not die.

 She may be right about one thing; Jamie could be anything and not died. I remembered a quote by Douglas MacArthur, old soldiers never die; they just fade away. She could be a ghost or a part of nature in spirit but left her body here with us. When it was time to bury the coffin, I excused myself to look for Gran’s grave. The truth was I couldn’t stand looking at coffins especially the one with Jamie’s body. Jamie was the first person who was so close to me to die. I couldn’t stop sobbing. Catherine Rhys-Deaux. The name was on a gravestone not far from Jamie’s grave. I left the flowers and stepped back.

            I felt someone’s hand was on my shoulder. I jerked away from the unfamiliar touch. I was afraid it would be Gran’s or Jamie’s ghost. Apparently, it was Maryanne.

            “Was she a part of your family?” she asked.

            “She used to be. She died ten years ago. She was my grandmother. My mum moved to London a long time ago. She never wanted to come back to Australia. I won airplane tickets and she tried to stop me from coming here. She was my mum’s mother.”

            “Then luckily you didn’t listen to her or you wouldn’t have met any of us,” Maryanne replied.

            “You’re right.” I ended the conversation about Gran. Mum didn’t realize how much she owed Gran. Gran was there for Alice after Richard’s death. Gran took care of Valerie and Alice. For God’s sake, she was her mother!

            “May God rest her soul. Let’s go. My parents will send you home. Bibiana left earlier just now.”

            “Okay,” I mumbled, following her to her parents’ car before glancing back at Gran’s grave.

            I’m sorry for not being there when you died, I thought. I could almost see her sitting on the gravestone, shaking her head at me in reply.