All I want to know is if this will be all worth it.

All I want is stability.

All I want is to be seen and heard. To be loved.

God, I want to be loved.

All of this sounds like I'm begging, peddling for attention.

It physically hurts when I can't properly express what I'm feeling, but let me tell you this.

I feel that I need a following, that I need to be a social media presence in order to exist. I've been isolated for months now, I feel as if my motivation is slipping.

I don't want to die. I want to be happy.

God, I just want to be happy about tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow.

It's all about the followers, it's all about the people... but in the end, I am aware that I don't love myself.

So I seek validation.

And I seek it. Like oxygen. I can't breathe without it.

And that. Is the nauseating truth.