***

AFTER taking a warm shower, I dressed myself in my comfortable pyjamas. Manipis na sando at shorts lang naman para komportable ako kapag natulog. Inabot ko ang roba na nakasabit sa labas ng banyo at siniksik ang smartphone sa bulsa ng roba. Pinatuyo ko na rin ang aking buhok bago magtungo sa veranda ng hotel room.

Malamig na ang simoy ng hangin sa labas at pulos ilaw mula sa mga gusali, sasakyan, at mga poste ang nagniningning sa paligid. Kahit na ilang palapag ang distansiya ng veranda ko sa ground floor, naririnig ko ang magkakahalong mga boses, mapa-bata man o matanda.

I looked at the sky, and I could hardly see the stars. I read it somewhere that it could be because of the air pollution. I was a little sad about it since I loved just silently staring at the sky as if I were in my little untouchable world.

I had always loved the stars in the sky. That was the only clear memory I had of my birth mother before she left me in my father's care. Her face had already turned blurry, but I still wish to meet her. Gusto kong marinig mula sa kaniya mismo kung bakit niya ako iniwan kay Papá at tama ba ang naging desisyon niya roon.

Pakiramdam ko, mas magiging masaya ako kung hindi niya ako iniwan sa Espanya . . . sa pangangalaga ng mga tauhan ni Papá. Kahit hindi na 'ko tanggapin ni Papá bilang legal na anak niya, mas pipiliin ko na makasama si Mamá. Kahit isang beses lang, gusto kong itanong kay Mamá kung naging tama ba ang desisyon niya na iwan ako. Tama ba ang naging buhay ko kung sa kaniya ako lumaki?

I shook my head as I felt my eyes getting warm and watery. There was no room for me to be emotional. I came here for a purpose . . . and I hope this trip will make sense for me. This wasn't just an adventure for me but a journey to complete the missing pieces of my distorted self.

Naramdaman ko ang pag-vibrate ng aking smartphone mula sa bulsa ng roba. Akala ko tumatawag si yaya ngunit may dumating pala na email mula kay Rome. My thumb immediately clicked on the notification to read his email.

***

From: Rome
Subject: Project CommuniKATE 1

Nice.

Sorry, got caught up with stuff and maybe we could talk again tomorrow? Hope that's fine.

Thanks.

Rome :)

***

I felt my shoulders dropped a little. He sounded nice but also appeared very busy. Siguro estudyante nga siya sa university na 'yon. I think that would be more accurate to assume.

Yes, it was just me having all these first impressions about a stranger I would only communicate with via email.

I wonder how old Rome was. Baka magka-edad kami o baka malakas lang din ang trip niya katulad ko na hindi pala estudyante roon at pumasok lang nang araw na iyon. Posible rin kaya na nagkita kami nang araw na iyon?

Our paths may have crossed that day, like those romance novels I was made to read growing up. The main characters had bumped into each other several times without realising who the other person was. It was never about the appearances but the connection that was made.

Hmm . . . I wonder.

Oh, well. I could ask him about it. That was the whole idea of this project. But the moment this conversation becomes inappropriate, I would drop it in a heartbeat.

I couldn't go too personal with telling things about myself. Baka madulas pa ako. I cannot tell him I was from a royal family despite being an illegitimate daughter.

After all, a royal is still a royal.

***

To: Rome <[email protected]>
Subject: Project CommuniKATE 1

Hey Rome,

It's okay. Sure thing! Let's chat more tomorrow. But if I'm guessing it right, sounds like student ka sa KBU?

Anyway, have a good night, Rome.

Juliette

***

MATAPOS i-send ang email, binalik ko ang smartphone sa bulsa ng roba ko. Bumuntonghinga ako at muling tumitig sa madilim na kalangitan. But with no stars in sight, I went back to my room, slid and locked the sliding door.

Nahiga na ako sa kama at muling kinuha ang aking smartphone. I started scrolling through the Spanish news. Puro mukha nina Eugenio at nina Papá talaga. It was about the coronation, scandals, and rumours surrounding the royal family. This was expected. Since the king was ill, everyone had been on standby to see what would happen next.

If things turned sour and something terrible did happen to the kin, I was confident that news was also prepared and would be all over the world's feed in a blink.

I could imagine the royal family's legal team trying to remedy and take legal action on every piece of information about the family. I do not wish to jinx myself, but I hope they do not discover me and unravel my identity.

Napabuntonghinga ako muli. Pinatay ko na muli ang smartphone at kusang bumagsak ang braso ko sa kama. I turned to my side and closed my eyes, letting the darkness engulf me to sleep.

Kinabukasan, maaga akong umalis ng hotel. Wearing my maong pants and a plain white tee, I went straight to the long line of jeepneys closeby. I haven't been here for long, but I had the chance to learn a lot already. Kapag magbibiyahe, dapat talaga alam kung ano ang sasakyan at bababan dito. Malayo-layo rin kasi mula rito sa hotel at ayokong masiyadong gumamit ng app dahil nakakontekta nag bank account ko.

Delikado. Mahirap na, baka ma-trace pa nila ako.

After almost 30 minutes, nakarating ako sa munisipyo. I was told to personally come here and cross my fingers and hope that they have information about my birth mother. To my dismay, there was an awful long line. At nasabihan din ako na baka magtagal din ako rito. Akala ko maaga na ako pero may ilan na kanina pa rin naghihintay.

Patuloy ako sa pagtipa ng aking smartphone habang naghihintay sa pila sa munisipyo. Mahaba ang pila ngunit wala akong panahon na dapat aksayahin.

It was 10:20 AM, and I got bored of waiting. Binalik ko ang tingin ko sa emails at puro emails mula sa Spain ang laman niyon. While scrolling, I noticed that there was no response from Rome.

Nag-send naman ang email ko kagabi, 'di ba? Natanggap kaya niya?

I checked the sent items at nandoon nga ang huling email na pinadala ko sa kaniya. Baka hindi pa lang naman niya nakikita kasi busy pa rin siya? Pero bakit parang napapraning ako na wala pa siyang sagot? Nag-drop na ba siya agad sa project na 'to? Magugulat na lang ba ako kung buglang magpapadala ng email si Kate na tapos na agad ang bahagi ko sa proyekto niya?

Hindi ko alam kung ano'ng sumapi sa akin pero nagpadala ulit ako ng email sa kaniya. I wasn't one to always respond, but I didn't know what pushed me to do so.

***

To: Rome <[email protected]>
Subject: Project CommuniKATE 1

Hey Rome,

Just checking if you received my last email? :)

Juliette

***

I immediately hit send without a second thought.

One . . . two . . .

¡Mierda!

After a few seconds, I realised what I had just done. Namilog ang mga mata ko at kinalog-kalog ko pa ang phone ko, imagining and even hoping that I could take it back.

Why did I send that email? I sounded like a girlfriend trying to contact her partner for not receiving a response on time?! Letizia estas loca!

Out of the blue, my alias Letizia Bartolome was called inside. Nanlamig ang mga kamay ko at parang nablangko bigla ang isip ko.

¡Ay dios mío! What have I done?!

***

Thank you for reading! Also, check out《 SOLEMATE: ROME 》by Imcrazyyouknow for Rome's POV!

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JO ELLE