Tw: death

The radio in the truck is telling us how the world is coming to an end.

I ignore it.

I already know everything anyway, and it's not as if the people can't see the huge ass asteroid hurtling straight towards earth.

In the past, I would've gladly it burn and that would be that.

I was tired and oh so angry that I let it consume me completely.

That was when Will Solace came into my life.

He was like the sun, a guiding beacon. He became a constant in my life.

I don't know where he came from. He never told me and I had never asked.  The past was of no importance to me.

I was his and he was mine. It was enough.

He helped me out of the darkness I held myself in.

I didn't feel sad or angry anymore.

But that didn't stop the end of world, and when it came, he took it in stride.

But he was nervous. I could see that by the way he was subtly drumming a foreign beat on the steering wheel.

I want to say something, anything, to reassure him that it would be alright. But how can I convince him when I can't even convince myself.

I keep quiet.

I didn't want to be here riding in an abandoned truck we found on the highway. If it was up to me, we wouldn't be here. I hadn't wanted to move. The end of the world would come and there wasn't anything anyone could do. I had only came because Will had come and for him, I would follow him to the ends of the earth.

I close my eyes and imagine a paradise for me and him.

There's a blue sky. A beach. A picnic blanket. Jazz playing on the speakers. The soft lull of the waves. It is peaceful and there is no suffering. No death. Just us.

I'm startled out of my fantasy when I hear screaming.

They are louder here in the city and harder to block out.

The window is down and the wind is rustling my hair. It keeps going into my eyes and I have to reach up every so often and brush it away.

The smoke is thick here but I have no difficulty breathing in the polluted air.

It is the screams that I am more worried about. I didn't think they would be this loud. They unnerve me.

We pass the people scrawled out on the sidewalks, their bodies dirty and frail, most are tainted with red. Some are breathing. Some aren't.

We pass a woman on her knees in the middle of the road.

She is glaring up at the heavens, her throat opened in a guttural scream that seemed to go on forever and ever and sink into the remains of the buildings around her. The veins on her neck stick out and thick fat tears slide down her face as she cradles a small bundle of cloth in her arms.

She is cursing, her speech indistinguishable as she pulls at her hair, thin strands falling to the ground at her feet.

I roll the window up as Will drives away.

We made it quite a distance before I spoke again.

I said "Will, I think we're doing something wrong."

And "Will, I don't want to be here anymore."

And "Will, please take me away. I don't want to go through this anymore."

But loudest of all was "Will, don't leave me. Gods please don't leave me."

Will parked the car. He turned off the engine and embraced me as I sobbed into his shoulder.

He was shaking but he was trying to hide it.

"I won't ever leave you Nico." He said. "No matter what happens next."

~

We sat there on top of the hill as the sun set.

"We don't have long here." Will said.

"No, we don't." I agreed.

"Do you ever think..." he paused

I nudged him gently with the back of my hand to get him to continue.

"Do you ever think that it could've gone differently? That it didn't have to end in... this?"

I paused. "Yes"

"But the world is still going to end anyway."

I nodded.

"Will you miss it?" Will asked after a beat of silence.

"Miss what?"

Will gestured his arms around them, all encompassing.

I thought long and hard, "yes" I finally decided "yes I will."

"What's next do you think?" Will whispered, as if the thought of that scared him.

I shrugged. I had never given it much thought before.

"Whatever it is, I want it to be with you."

Then it was time.

Will stood up and held out his hand and I took it without a second thought.

We stood side by side as the world burned below us.

We waited as the world ended and the screaming subsided.

It was quiet. So quiet that I almost believed that the world I had created had never known sound before.

Will stayed by my side.

We left the destroyed car on the top of the hill and we walked down to the city.

We see dead bodies strewn everywhere and for a second, I think that we are trespassing in a graveyard.

We are the only ones left.

As we walk through the rubble, I think back to the woman I saw in the middle of street. I hoped it had been quick when she passed. I hope she had been reunited with her baby boy who she held in her arms as she breathed her last breath. I hope she found peace in the end.

I hope I find peace.

It is a thought that is so painfully human that I almost collapse.

I am not human. I never was. I am a deity who created this world and as is Will.

This world was in ruins so I -no, WE- put a stopped to the suffering.

I had my doubts, but in the end, it would be better for everyone.

The future was uncertain now but Will was still here with me, he wasn't going anywhere and it felt like we could do everything.

Time to rebuild.

Maybe I could have that paradise with Will after all.

Have you ever read an apocalyptic world ending book and the end was something along the lines of

-"I didn't know if the world would end or if this would all be a hoax, but what I did know was that..."

Or

-"As the clock ticked down the seconds, the whole world held their breath as I squeeze the hand of the man who brought me to life on this dying day."

And you never find out if the main characters die or not or if the world really ends.

WELL, i got this inspiration from reading "Horario" by TJ KLUNE (on his website)

This is closure for me in some way, I suppose? To know that yes, everyone died. (Except for the immortal deities)

I hope you find the same closure in my work.