Nico's POV

The grass stands up straight underneath his back, pushing him up just a fraction of an inch as he lays on the hill with Will's hand in his. When Nico glances into Will's eyes the night sky is reflected in his pupils, a million tiny stars shimmering like glitter. There's a light blush on his cheeks; the late August night is colder than most, and Nico scoots closer to Will, their shoulders touching. His muscles are relaxed and he's breathing easier than he has in months but still, there's a weight pressing down on his chest that's growing heavier as they lie in silence, listening to the crickets in the woods. "Something wrong?" Will asks, turning to face Nico. There's a blade of grass stuck to his cheek and Nico brushes it off, watching as it flutters to the ground. When it's gone, Nico's hand is left lingering on Will's cheek, the soft warmth of his face underneath his skin. 

"No," Nico says quietly, unconvincingly. Not even meaning to he glances at the ground on his other side, the side away from Will, and Will frowns, giving Nico's hand a squeeze. Nico takes a deep breath, blowing it up to the sky. 

"You sure?" Nico sighs, avoiding Will's eyes as they try to meet his. 

"No," he says with a small smile that's more like a wince. 

"You wanna talk about it?" Will is clearly trying to make eye contact at this point but Nico is still staring at the ground, watching a line of ants march back to their hill. They weave through the blades of grass, tiny feet stomping like soldiers, and Nico doesn't open his mouth until they've all slipped back into the ground, one by one. 

"No," he says after a long period of quiet. Will laughs softly, kissing Nico's cheek softly. His lips are warm and Nico shifts, trying not to smile. 

"Come on, really? All this time spent together, and you still don't trust me?" 

"That's not-" he sighs, watching an ant dart out of the hill before diving back inside just as quickly as it had come out. "You know that's not true." 

"Feels pretty true." Nico winces, his stomach hardening underneath his skin. 

"Sorry." He shakes his head, massaging the growing headache in between his eyes. "It's just- I know I'm being irrational, but I can't help but worry. You're leaving tomorrow, and we're not gonna see each other for a really long time." He scratches at his arm until his nail has brought up a thin, white line. He doesn't know what to do but when he looks at Will he's smiling, fighting back a laugh. "What?" 

"Nothing." He shakes his head, his fingers drumming against the back of Nico's hand. "It's just almost funny that after everything we've been through, you think it would be a little bit of distance that would break us apart." Nico chews on his lip, flinching as he accidentally draws blood. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Will frown. "It's not just the distance, is it?" 

"No." Nico's voice is quiet in the darkness of the night and the crickets sound ten times louder than before. "When you leave, you're not gonna, you know, do anything with anyone else, right?" The words sound dumb coming out of mouth and next to him, he hears Will laugh. "Sorry. I mean, I know you wouldn't, and I know you're amazing, but I'm still irrationally scared." 

"Hey, I get it." He kisses Nico's cheek again and Nico smiles, blushing hard. "You think that I'm a shitty boyfriend and I'm gonna cheat on you the first chance I get with some tall, muscular, blond football player named Chad." Nico slaps him lightly on the arm, his blush deepening as he avoids Will's eyes. 

"That's not what I said," he says, squirming gently as Will wraps his arms around Nico's shoulders. "I love you, and I trust you, but I'm still scared. I don't know why." 

"I do get it, though, really." Will's voice is quieter and they listen to the crickets around them, and in Will's arms, Nico feels as if it's the two of them alone amid a sea of blackness. He can barely feel the blades of grass brushing at his arms anymore, and the faint breeze is gone. The night is clear but the moon is gone and, he has to admit, it scares him a little bit, the sensation of floating. "You've had bad relationships in the past. But I promise you, I'm not one of them." He hugs Nico's body closer to his, planting a kiss on the top of his head. Nico lets himself sink into Will's chest and he traces his finger along Will's tan arm, feeling the soft hair underneath his skin. He can just barely make out a splotch of freckles in the darkness, like a tiny constellation in the vast universe that is his body. His finger lingers on it, and he runs his tongue across his upper row of teeth as he tries to think of an answer. 

"Thanks," he says after a period of complete silence when even the crickets are silent. 

"You don't believe me, do you?" 

"I-" Nico wants nothing more than to say that he believes Will, with enough conviction in his voice so that he'll start to believe it himself. But he can't bring himself to say it, can't bring himself to believe it. It would feel like he was lying to himself. "I don't know," he says finally. "I'm sorry." 

"You don't have to be sorry." Will's voice is so quiet that if the breeze were stronger it could have carried it away but Nico can still hear it, just barely. "I'd have trust issues, too, if I had never had a good, solid relationship." His fingers comb through Nico's hair, long and soft. He doesn't do it often; once when his brain was on fire with a fever, once when he broke down about his future. But it feels good, whenever it happens. And there's a part of him that's inclined to ask Will to do it more often but he knows if it was a normal occurrence, it would never feel as special. 

"Thank you," he says, turning his face so that it's pressing into Will's side. His tee shirt is soft and he smells of freshly cut grass and Nico breathes everything in if only to be able to remember that moment for the rest of his life. "I love you." His face is still hidden in Will's side but Will's hands stop moving through Nico's hair for just a split second and he twirls a single strand around his finger. Will has only done that a few times. Will only does that when he's smiling.

"I love you, too." His voice is slightly husky and for a second Nico wonders if he's getting teary but when he looks up Will is smiling softly, just as he had thought, his fingers combing through every inch of Nico's hair. It's warmer at Will's side so he buries his head back into his shirt, taking another deep breath as he tries to take a mental snapshot of the scene. The warmth of Will's body, the soft touch, the faint sounds coming from around them. He wants to hold onto this moment for as long as he can until every last detail fades away because when they wake up tomorrow, everything will be different.  

Will's POV

He doesn't realize that they fell asleep until he's shifting underneath the boiling light of the sun, the weight of Nico's head on his chest. He groans, sitting up and catching Nico's head in his hands before gently lowering it down to the ground. He picks tiny blades of grass off of his arm as he squints at the sky, the sun already burning bright. He pulls out his phone and he feels his heart stop when he sees that it's already noon. He's got two hours to catch his flight and if he knows his luck, it's going to take twice as long as he hopes. "Nico." He pats on his arm incessantly, his finger trembling slightly. "Get up." 

"What?" Nico's voice is hoarse from the morning and he sits up, wincing as he stares into the sun. "Did we fall asleep?" 

"Apparently. Come on, we have to go." 

"What time is it?" Nico asks, barely able to keep up with Will's quick strides as they make their way to the car, still parked at the bottom of the hill. Will slides the keys into the ignition with shaking hands. 

"Just past noon, and we still have to swing by my house to get my stuff." He sighs in relief as the engine roars to life and he presses down on the gas, the tires squealing against the pavement as they peel away from the hill. His breaths are still short and sporadic and he doesn't know why until he realizes that he's about to get on a plane and fly away from everything he's ever known. He thought he was ready, he's thought he was ready for years but now that the concept is in his face, now that he has just under two hours to board his plane, he isn't sure that he is. 

"You feeling good about it?" Nico's eyes are searching his face and there's a small part of Will that wishes Nico didn't know him so well. 

"No," Will says honestly, tightening his grip on the wheel. His house is coming into sight, just immaculate enough that it looks fake. He knows that his parents are somewhere in there, too. Sunday morning, they'll have just gotten back from church. He feels slightly nauseous. "Nothing feels right. Nothing's how I imagined it would be." Nico glances at the floor of the car, playing with the cord of his earbuds. 

"I'm really sorry," he says, his voice hoarse again. "I wish it didn't have to be like this for you." Will forces a smile onto his face, parking the car in the driveway. 

"It's fine," he says. He can't even convince himself. "You're here, at least." Nico is still frowning, his finger turning red as the cord of his earbuds cut off his circulation. "And if you want to stay here, I don't mind. My house isn't exactly the most comfortable place to be." 

"No way," Nico says, stepping out onto the driveway. The pavement is hot underneath Will's feet when he steps out and his hand lingers on the handle as he considers jumping back in. He doesn't need his things, really. He can grab Nico and leave without anything. He can buy new clothes there. But then he thinks about the fact that he has to pay his own way through college after coming out, despite the fact that his parents are overflowing with cash. He had barely gotten any financial aid because at the time he was accepted, his parents were paying. Now, he'll be coming out of school with hundreds of thousands of dollars of college debt, if his parents don't get their morals straight. He's barely going to have money for food, let alone clothes. "I'm here for you." He squeezes Will's arm and Will smiles and all of a sudden, everything feels okay again. 

"I love you so much," Will says as he stares at the door. 

"I love you, too." That's one person, at least. Will holds onto Nico's words, the fact that Nico cares about him will be there for him, as he steps up to the doorway and pushes it open. 

He can hear the whistle of the tea kettle in the kitchen and immediately he knows where his parents are; they drink tea after every service, no matter the weather. Hopefully, he won't have to interact. He thinks that it might be too painful. "Come on." He grabs Nico's hand and pulls him maybe a little bit too harshly towards the staircase. "Let's just get this over with." He keeps his vision in a straight line the best he can, hoping to avoid his parents. They make it up the stairs alright and Will grabs two bags as Nico grabs one. He's about to turn back around when he takes a look at his room, one last time. The walls have been bare for ages, not that he's spent much time in there. Most of his summer has been spent at Nico's; his mother might be half-removed from Nico's life, but at least she doesn't care if they hold hands in front of her. He isn't sure when he'll be back there, either; it won't be by winter break, not if his parents don't get their act together. Tears begin to well up in his eyes and Nico gives his arm a squeeze with his free hand, pressing a kiss to Will's cheek. A tear slides down the curve of his face and Nico wipes it away, staring at it for half a second before flicking it to the floor. 

"It'll be okay," he says. "They'll come around. They still love you, you know." 

"No, they don't." It hurts to say it out loud, but maybe it's time to admit it. "Not right now, anyway." 

"They'll get there eventually. You're still their son, after all." Will bites his lip, the weight of his bags pulling down his arms. 

"We should go," Will says after a period of silence, adjusting his grip on his bags. "I don't want to be in here anymore." He turns his back on his empty room, completely devoid of the personality it once held. Part of him misses it; the late nights spent doing homework at his desk as he listened to music, the sleepovers, the posters that he had hung on the walls, the juice-stained rug. This was the room where he had woken up to discover that he had drunkenly slept with someone, that someone turning out to be Nico. Part of him wishes that he could bring all of those memories with him but for that to happen he'd have to bring the bad, too; the overwhelming stress of school, the Bible study he was forced to host his sophomore year, the feeling of collapsing onto his bed and sobbing after his parents told him in no uncertain terms that, if he liked boys, he wouldn't be their son. He's glad to be leaving those memories behind so he steps over the threshold without looking back. Maybe a fresh start is just what he needs. 

When they're at the bottom of the stairs he sets his bags down, scanning the house for his siblings. "You want to say bye to Austin and Kayla?" Nico asks, piling his bag on top of the others. 

"Yeah. I'm gonna miss them." Despite the fact that they had been brought up just as Will had been they had accepted him without question, a debt that Will feels as if he'll never be able to repay. When they piled on top of him, hugging him as he sobbed, it almost compared to the love he still craved from his parents. "Maybe they're in the back room." He grabs onto Nico's hand as he walks through the house and Nico's eyebrows raise but he doesn't say anything, giving it a light squeeze. Will feels his stomach flip as he walks through the kitchen, his mother on her phone and his father reading the paper as they sip their tea. His mother casts a look at him and Nico, at their hands clasped together between them; his father won't even look at him. He feels a lump rising up in his throat but Nico presses a soft kiss to his cheek and he feels his heartbeat slow back down. He doesn't look at his parents as he walks through the kitchen; they don't stop him, and they don't try to talk to him. Even if they did, he doesn't want to listen to a word they have to say. 

Just as he suspected, Kayla and Austin are hunched up on the couch in the back room, PlayStation controllers in their hands, Kayla grinning widely as she smashes the button and Austin's brow furrowed in intense concentration. When they see him they throw down their controllers without hesitation, and Nico breaks off his grip so that Kayla and Austin can wrap him in a tight hug. "I can't believe you're leaving," Austin says, squeezing so tightly Will is having trouble breathing. 

"Yeah, neither can I," Will says with a small laugh, hugging back. "I'm gonna miss you two." 

"We're gonna miss you, too." Kayla steps back, her eyes sweeping up and down Will's body and he feels as if she can see all the pain of the last few months. "Did Mom and Dad talk to you?" 

"I don't think they're going to try every time soon." Will squeezes his hands into a fist, glancing at the floor. Kayla's eyes always fill with sadness when he talks about it to her, and he doesn't want to see it, not today. "It's okay, though. I didn't expect it." 

"I'm sorry." Kayla's voice is quiet, and she pats Will awkwardly on the arm. 

"Yeah, sorry we have sucky parents." Will almost laughs; Austin has a strange gift of lightening up any conversation, and it's come in handy recently. "We got you something, though." 

"Really?" Will glances up to see that they're smiling, and Kayla is reaching into her pocket. "You didn't have to do that." 

"Yeah, we did," Kayla says as she hands him a thick wad of cash. "We put together a little collection since Mom and Dad aren't helping anymore." Will runs his thumb across the sides of the bills, counting fifty after fifty. He feels that lump rising back up in his throat and he wipes away a single tear before it can make its way down his cheek. 

"This is too much. You guys work so hard for your money. Seriously, your jobs suck." 

"You need it more than we do," Austin says. "It was shitty of them to pull out like that after you were already relying on them. Good luck in college. We're gonna miss you." They both hug him again and Will lets himself cry this time, his tears soaking into Kayla's hair. 

"And I get it if you don't want to see Mom and Dad on your vacations, but at least visit us, okay?" Kayla says, pressing the tip of her finger into her eye. Despite her best efforts, her eyes are glossed over with tears, and Austin is smiling waterily. "Don't abandon us just because our parents suck." 

"I won't," Will promises. "I love you guys." 

"We love you, too," Austin says. Will glances at Nico to see him smiling, his arms crossed over his chest. 

"We should go," Will says, but for the first time in his life, he wants to stay. "I'm gonna miss my flight." He's still crying and part of him regrets crying in front of his siblings and his boyfriend, but he didn't really expect to be doing anything else. 

"We'll see you later," Kayla says. She's given into the fact that she's crying, too, and he sees Austin swallowing hard. 

"Yeah," Will says, voice raspy. "See you later." He turns around and Nico plants a kiss on his lips, running a thumb over his cheek. 

"You ready?" 

"Yeah, I'm ready." This time when he walks through the kitchen with Nico he stares his parents in the face, holding Nico's hand with his face still stained with tears. When they're in the doorway of the living room and the kitchen Will grabs Nico's hand, pulling him in and kissing him hard. His hands clutch the back of Nico's head and he can feel Nico's arms around his waist. For the first time in his life, he isn't scared anymore. 

His bags are thrown in the trunk but he doesn't move the steering wheel, stuck staring at his house. Somewhere in there, his siblings are playing Call of Duty, missing him already, and his parents are sipping tea as they try to distract themselves from the sight of their son kissing his boyfriend. It feels strange, knowing that he won't see that house for a long, long, time. He'll see Kayla and Austin when he stays at Nico's or a friend's over winter break, but he won't go back home until his parents apologize, because he refuses to be the first one to reach out. He isn't going to apologize for being himself. "We should go," Nico whispers, his hand fluttering down onto Will's arm. "You're going to miss your flight." 

"Yeah," Will says, pulling at the steering wheel. "Yeah, you're right." The car begins to move down the street, picking up speed, and Will doesn't glance into the rearview mirror once. He's ready to let go of the shame associated with that house and now seems like a good time to start.

Nico stays with him as long as he can, until Will's flight is announced and he forces himself to stand up. Nico grabs onto his hand, kissing him hard. They're wrapped in each other's arms, and Will never wants to let go. He can feel the sun streaming in through the window and the sound of planes taking off surrounds him. He doesn't want to break apart, doesn't want to let Nico go, but Nico pulls out of his arms, tracing his finger down Will's cheek. "You really have to go." 

"I really don't want to." 

"I know." Nico smiles sadly. "But you have to." His eyes are welling with tears about to splash over the brim and Will bites his lip, trying to memorize every inch of Nico's face so that when he closes his eyes it'll be there, and it'll feel like he never left. 

"I'm going to miss you so fucking much." 

"I know. I'm coming down to visit in a few weeks though, remember?" Will smiles. 

"Yeah. That'll be nice." He grabs onto Nico's hand, running his thumb up and down his palm. "You know how much I love you, right?" 

"Yeah. And you know how much I love you?" 

"Yeah." He doesn't know how to say goodbye so he pulls Nico into a tight hug, burying his face in Nico's shoulder. He still smells of the grass from that morning and he breathes in the scent. "Everything's going to be okay, by the way. In case you were still doubtful." He pauses, glancing into Nico's eyes. "Are you?" Nico doesn't talk for a few seconds, his eyes searching Will's face. 

"I was," he says. "But after going to your house, I don't think there's any way I could be." Will smiles; in the light from the window Nico is stunning, his face awash in sunlight. "And thank you, for everything that you've done for me. It was brave of you to come out for me, but I couldn't be more grateful." 

"It was time anyway." Will winces as he hears the loudspeaker crackle, announcing the last call for his flight. "I really have to go, don't I?" 

"Yeah, you do." He breaks apart from Will, distancing himself. It hurts Will, but he knows it's necessary. Will doesn't know if he was the one who'd be able to break apart from the embrace first. "Call me when you get there?" 

"Yeah. I love you." 

"I love you, too." He stares at Nico as long as possible, Nico's face beaming as a single tear traces its way down his cheek. He stares at him until he rounds a corner and Nico disappears from sight and he takes a stuttering sigh as he tries to keep from crying again that day. There are days, he thinks to himself as he boards the plane, days like today when he wonders what would have happened if he had never come out to his parents. They'd be here, first of all, and he wouldn't be facing hundreds of thousands of dollars in debts. But then he feels bad wondering that because then he thinks about the months spent with Nico, the love that bloomed between them as summer passed. And when he thinks about that, the feeling of being wrapped in Nico's arms with the grass underneath him, he knows he wouldn't trade that feeling for the world. Instead of holding onto the bad memories as the plane takes off, the feeling of his parents disappointment, being shunned in his own home, he holds on to the memories of him and Nico because when he thinks about those, nothing else seems to matter. Just after he had come out to his parents when their hatred of who he was still burned like a fire, he had almost drowned in the feeling of hatred, the feeling that he was incapable of being loved. But Nico had been there for him, time and time again, letting Will stay at his house for days at a time and slowly, he had been built back up, piece by piece until he felt whole again. Maybe his parents didn't love him anymore, and maybe they would never love him like they used to. But he had Nico, Nico who's love burned brighter than anyone he had ever met. And, at that moment, his love is all he needs. 

Nico's POV

He must look insane, with his face pressed up against the window as he watches Will's plane disappear among the clouds. He's fighting hard not to cry in public as he hangs onto the place where the clouds swallowed it up, hanging onto his final memory of Will, the feeling of his skin underneath his hands, the cloudy blue of his eyes after they kissed. There was a time when he would have been worried that in a month or two, someone else would have that same view of the cloudy blue, that someone else would feel Will's skin underneath their hands. But after watching Will's actions, the kiss of defiance in front of his parents that told them in no uncertain terms that Will loved Nico, after spending the summer in his arms, the fear that used to consume his every thought has changed into a faint, nagging voice at the back of his mind. 

There had been a time where people's love for him slowly rotted away, when people's love for him was spotted with holes that he fell through, time and time again. There was a time when he had given up completely, resigned to a cold, loveless life. But when Will came, with burning love that could melt the ice around Nico's heart, he felt hopeful for the first time in a long time. And maybe he had bad relationships in the past, maybe his parents acted like he wasn't there half of the time, but he had Will. And after everything, after having person after person leave him and hurt him, Will's love is all he needs. 

Hi guys, it honestly feels kinda crazy that this series is already over. I didn't think that it would end up being this long but it turned out to be one of my favorite things I've ever written, and I hope you liked it as much as I did!

Nina