Hi guys! I've been really excited to put this up and before you start reading, I just want to give a bit of context! It takes place at a Catholic boarding school in the 80s, where being gay was significantly more stigmatized than it is now. Just a quick warning, the series is going to deal with some themes of homophobia, although that's closer towards the end. Also, I have kind of an exciting announcement at the end, so stick around for that!

Will's POV

"Our father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name..." Will glances up. Everyone's heads are bowed in prayer, and, as usual, Octavian leads it on the alter, a smug smile on his face as he recites the words that Will has to hear every day. "Your will be done on Earth as it is in heaven." Will sneaks a glance behind him. Nico's head is bowed with everyone else's, but he sneaks a glance at his phone as the prayer comes to an end. "Amen." Five hundred bodies stand, a thousand feet scraping against the floor as chatter ensues. "Everyone, remember to thank your teachers today!" Octavian says into the microphone. His voice is grating. Will wishes that he would just lead the prayer, sit down, and act like a normal student, but a day without Octavian trying to kiss ass to the teachers wouldn't really be a day at St. Mary's Catholic School in the first place. 

"Hey," Nico says, slipping into step with Will. "You ready to have religion class with dumb-dumb suck up boy over there?" 

"Octavian's going to hear you one of these days," Will says. "And then he'll report you to one of the teachers, and then you're getting kicked out. You're already on thin ice. Also, I think he's already heard you." Will gestures behind him, where Octavian is staring daggers at Nico's back. 

"Oh, whatever," Nico says. "The only people who like him are the teachers, and I think he's starting to get on even their nerves." 

"You know, I can hear you," Octavian says as they take a turn into a different hallway. The walls are gilded in gold, and a chandelier swings above their heads. "You are on thin ice, you know. The teachers hate you." 

"Oh, boo-hoo," Nico says. "Is that supposed to, like, make me feel bad about myself?" 

"It's supposed to make you think about the consequences of your actions," Octavian says. Nico and Will keep speeding up, but Octavian matches their pace with ease. "Nico, Nico, are you listening to me?" 

"We're listening, Octavian," Will says. He sighs, turning around. "Don't you have, like, your own friends to annoy?" 

"Well, Sister Johnson and I eat lunch together," Octavian says as they slip into their religion classroom. "We have fascinating discussions about theology." 

"Well, maybe you can talk to her about theology instead of talking to us about... stuff," Will says. As they walk to their seats, Will's hand brushes against Nico's. Shivers run up his spine and as his heart starts to throb wildly he jerks his hand away. Warmth starts to creep up his cheeks and he feels Nico's fingers press against the small of his back before they sit down. 

"But I like talking to you guys about stuff," Octavian says, slipping into his seat behind Will's. "It's funny to watch Nico get upset." 

"Shut up, Octavian, nothing you say makes me upset," Nico snaps from next to Will. More students start to file in; Percy in front of Will, Hazel in front of Percy. 

"Like I said," Octavian says, grinning. "It's fun." Nico looks like he's about to go in on Octavian, but with one hand on Nico's arm, Will calms him. 

"Don't even try, Neeks, it's not worth it," he says. Sister Johnson steps into the room, setting her binder and textbook on her text. She surveys the room with cold eyes and her hands on her hips. Her presence always looms over the room and even though Will knows he hasn't (really) done anything, he feels as if he's being judged. As Sister Johnson takes her seat, Will can see Octavian's satisfied grin in his peripheral vision. Nico can gripe all he wants, but at the end of the day, everyone knows that Octavian rules the classroom, and nothing they say can change that.'

Sister Johnson grabs Nico by the arm as they walk past after class. "Nico, stay behind for a second," she says. Her eyes are narrow, and Nico flashes Will a grin. 

"Later," he says, before Sister Johnson pulls him into the room and Will is left standing in the hallway as the chatter and buzz of a passing period fills his ears. 

"Come on, Will, we gotta get to Calc," Jason says, nodding towards the door. 

"He'll be okay in there, right?" Will says, staring back at the door. Sister Johnson has closed it, and he can hear quiet talking from inside, a lecture just too quiet to make out. All around them, uniformed students move around them like water around a rock, the girls' skirts far past their knees and the boys' ties suffocatingly tight. 

"He'll be fine, Will, come on," Jason says. "Sister Johnson's a bitch, but she can't do any real harm." He frowns, and even though it's small, it brings a stab of fear to Will's heart. "At least, I don't think she can." 

Nico's POV

"Tell me, Nico," Sister Johnson says, taking a seat in her chair, hands clasped on the desk in front of her. "What's going on with your little feud with Octavian?" 

Nico has to fight to hold back a laugh. "That's what this is about? Octavian? Why isn't he in here, too? He was right in front of me leaving the classroom." 

"Octavian is one of my best students, Nico, and you've been antagonizing him your entire time at this school," Sister Johnson says. "You continuously disrupt my classes to argue with him, I see you arguing at mealtimes, and every chance you get, you're insulting him in some disgusting manner." Nico doesn't think that calling Octavian a pig-headed suck up boy was a disgusting manner in which to inult someone, but he won't fight Sister Johnson on this one. "Is there an issue that I should be aware of, or is it just petty teenage boy issues?" Her gaze is full of ice and even though Nico has stood up to every priest, nun, and administration member he's ever come across at St. Mary's Catholic school, he feels himself quaking under her stare. 

"Well, he's-" Nico stammers. "He's kind of- he's kind of a-" 

"Nico, please, don't bother," Sister Johnson says. "I think I know what you are going to say. I'll let you get to your next class, but know that you're on thin ice. I don't want to see you disrupting my classes any longer. Am I understood?" 

"Yes." 

"Yes, what?" 

"Yes, ma'am," Nico says. He stares Sister Johnson down, in one last-ditch attempt to regain any sort of dignity he came into the room with but as she stands up, he feels any dignity he has left drain out of his body. 

"You can go now, Nico, I have to prepare for my next class." She starts rummaging around in her desk drawers and as Nico fades to nothing but a spot on her vision, utterly ignored, he knows that he's lost. He grabs his bag off of the back of his chair and when he slips out of the classroom Percy is waiting for him, leaning against the wall with his bag slung around his shoulder. 

"Hey," Nico says. "You didn't have to wait for me." 

"I wasn't gonna leave you in there with her," Percy says. "I think she's evil. Seriously. I'm scared of her." 

"I don't think you're the only one," Nico says as they walk to their next class. As they walk out of the building, Nico is met with the crisp fall air on his face, orange leaves spiraling down to meet them as they walk. The tree in the middle of the green shudders in the wind and more leaves fall, a haze of orange and yellow and brown that coat the ground like a sheet of leaves. With the students in their uniforms, the blue of the pleated skirts and the white of the boy's ties, it looks almost cult-ish, and you can't tell anyone apart from behind. He had never wanted to come here in the first place, had begged to go to a public school with the rest of his middle school friends, but when he had turned fourteen, his parents had decided it would be a good idea. So now he's here, with castles for classrooms and a pair of eyes always watching him.

------

You can say a lot about catholic boarding school, but one thing that Nico has always enjoyed about it is the food. He walks through the line, grabbing little cartons of mozzarella sticks and paper plates of pizza with grease leaking through the bottom of the plate. He turns around, eyes sweeping over the dining hall, with four hundred heads bowed over plates of food, quiet chatter filling the room. The long tables that stretch across the hall are made out of sleek oak wood that glitters gently in the light of the chandeliers that hang above their heads. With everyone un-uniformed, the girls putting on cute dresses that they only otherwise wear to mass on Sunday, and the boys in awful shirts that almost make Nico miss the uniforms. 

"You eat horribly," Will says, shoveling a forkful of salad into his mouth. "You're going to die of a heart attack before you're thirty." 

"I thought you said I needed to eat more last year," Nico says. Will is wearing a soft blue sweater that brings out his eyes, and he feels his breath snatched away from him. 

"That doesn't mean I want you to eat like a five year old," Will says, playfully nudging Nico's shoulder. Sparks fly through his body, and he stares down at his food with a barely-contained grin. 

"I like eating like a five year old," Nico says. "It's comfort food." 

"Stop flirting, you two," Percy says with a laugh. He's clearly joking, but Nico feels his face go hot. 

"Yeah, stop flirting," Octavian says, passing by with a bowl of oatmeal on his tray. Really; who eats oatmeal for dinner? "You know that's a sin, right? And Sister Johnson is watching. She has eagle eyes." 

"Get out of here, no one cares," Nico says. He tries to put on his usual cocky smile that makes Octavian crazy with anger, but his heart is pounding in his chest and he feels sweat start to collect on his body. 

"Don't worry about it," Percy says as Octavian slinks away to join the rest of his greasy friends who still wear their stiff uniforms and constricting ties, even at dinner. "Besides, we all know you're not actually flirting." 

"Yeah," Will says. He picks at his salad, letting a tomato slide off of his fork. "Obviously not." 

"Anyway, have you noticed Annabeth checking me out?" Percy says, leaning over to catch a glimpse of her with her friends a couple tables down. "Because I think she's totally checking me out." 

"Yeah, I think so," Nico says, but even to him, his voice sounds hollow. He can't stop thinking about Octavian's comments, and even turned around, he swears he can feel Sister Johnson's eyes on his back.

Will's POV

"Dude, where are you going? It's like 11:30," Austin says, flipping through his textbook. 

"I'm gonna take a shower," Will says. "I feel gross." That part isn't a lie. Being in the dorms always makes him feel sticky, from a combination of living a lie and being force-taught a religion that he never really believed in in the first place. 

"If you get caught you're screwed," Austin says. "We're not supposed to be out 

"If I get caught," Will says, slinging his towel over his shoulder and grabbing his toiletries bag. "The bathrooms are really nice at night. Quiet. Peaceful. I don't have to deal with worrying about whether or not Octavian will be singing in the shower next to mine." Octavian sings on the occasion. And he isn't very good. "See you in, like, an hour." 

"Why do you take hour long showers?" 

"The hot water washes away my sins," Will says. He doesn't like that there's a bit of truth to his words. "See you, Austin." 

As soon as he's out of the dorm room, he takes a deep breath. The hallways are dark, with tiny wall lights sitting where the wall meets the ceiling. As Will creeps through the halls, he hears quiet conversation wafting out from underneath the door. Jason and Frank are laughing loudly about something, and Will knows as he slips into the bathroom that if anyone hears them, they'll be screwed. They clearly don't have as much sneaking around talent as Will does. 

He sticks his things in a shower stall and shuts the lock tight behind him before slipping underneath the door to the stall, back out into the main part of the bathroom. He brushes the dirt off of his sweatshirt before turning around, staring at the tiny slit between the floor and the door he had just slithered out of. It's getting harder and harder as he gets older, but it's worth trying to cram himself through the opening but it's worth it every time. 

He runs quietly through the halls, the hardwood cool on his sock-covered feet and the air crisp around him when he gets outside. He takes one sweeping look of the campus, for any wandering people who could possibly interrupt his plans. But all he hears is an owl hooting far away, and he takes it as a green light to steal across campus, nothing more than a shadow in the night. 

Even though the chapel is just a building, the lavish doors loom above him, three times his height and decorated in designs that remind Will of his childhood, being dragged to church services that had never wanted to be at in the first place. They creek and groan when he opens them, and he winces, taking one last glance behind him before closing them behind him.

On Sunday mornings, the chapel is filled with light, filtering through the stained glass windows and creating a kaleidiscope of colors on the floor. Usually, the pews are stuffed full with 400 students and faculty members, and the sound of hyms being sung fills up the high ceilings. But tonight, like all nights, it's silent. The statue of Jesus looms at the alter, staring over him almost in judgement. Will feels as if he's being stared down as he makes his way to his usual pew, where a single head stares up at the stained glass window. "Hey," Will says, sliding in next to him. 

"Hey," Nico says, turning to look at Will. His face looks softer in the glow of the moonlight. "You know, I almost thought you weren't coming." 

"You know me," Will says, grinning and leaning in to press a gentle kiss to Nico's cheeks. "I have to go through my process."

"Your process is just you being paranoid," Nico says, before drawing Will in for a deeper kiss, this one on the lips. Nico's fingers brush Will's cheek, and he feels a budding sense of warmth stemming from his heart. "You need to relax," Nico says once they break apart. "I just leave my dorm and Percy's never said anything. We've been doing this shit for, like, two and a half years? We're not gonna get caught." 

"Yeah, but if we do-" 

"If we do our reputations will be ruined and we're probably kicked out of Catholic school," Nico says. "But we haven't been caught yet, and I intend on keeping that streak. Don't worry about it, Will, we're fine." He kisses Will again and this time it's harder, force and passion driving it, and Will lets his worries melt away. 

They've been making out for half an hour when Will hears something creek outside. "What was that?" he asks, breaking apart from Nico. 

"It's just the wind," Nico says. "There's no one out there." 

"How do you know?" Will says. He can hear his heart beating in his throat. "It could be Octavian. Or Sister Johnson. Or literally anyone else who would wanna turn us in, so like, half the school." A branch snaps outside and Will shoots up, his breathing quick and shallow. 

"Will, hey, it's okay," Nico says, squeezing his bicep softly. "I promise. There's no one out there." 

"I know," Will says. There's a lump in his throat. "It's just- can we go? I'm nervous." 

Nico sighs, his eyes flitting to glance out one of the massive windows that line the chapel. He squeezes Will's bicep again, and his face falls. "Yeah, of course," Nico says. "Can I at least walk you back?" 

"It's too risky," Will says. "If we get caught separately, it'll be, like, a detention or something. But together, and people will start to speculate. And we'll have detention. You think I can get out of here first?" 

"Of course," Nico says. HIs smile is tight across his face and he leans in one last time, kissing Will on the lips. "Same time, same place tomorrow?" 

"As always," Will says. He stands up, taking a sweeping glance around the chapel, searching for anyone hiding under the pews or in the shadows. But the only movement is the swaying of the trees outside, and Will takes the silence of the campus as an excuse to slip out from the chapel, sprinting across the campus like a shadow moving across a wall. 

He makes sure his footsteps are quiet on the floor of the dorm as he walks. The sounds from behind the dorm doors have lessened since he left, and now he's surrounded by silence, with just a couple of whispers and the sounds of quiet movement. The bathroom he left his things in is still empty, and after slipping underneath the door, he wets his hair, scrubs in some shampoo and conditioner before drying off, brushing his teeth and gathering everything up. As he leaves the bathroom he catches a glimpse of Nico, walking into his dorm. His head hangs, and when he turns his head he flashes Will a smile, raises his hand in greeting before he's swallowed up in his dorm, and Will is alone and dripping with shower water. 

"Hey," Austin says when Will returns, cloaked in guilt and the stench of school water. "You really do take hour long showers, huh?" 

"Yeah," Will says. He can hear his heartbeat. "Every night. It's, like, my de-winding time, you know? Like, I get away from everyone, just hang out, take my time, go over my mistakes. Not like I have any. I do all the rules. I mean, I follow them all. All the rules." 

Austin cocks his eyebrow. "Yeah, okay, Will. I believe you." 

"Good," Will says. "I just like showering." 

"I know, Will. Anyway, you should get some sleep. It's getting late." Will glances at the clock on the wall, the hands sitting at 12:15. Morning prayer is at eight every morning, and if he doens't get some sleep, he'll never be able to keep his cool. Not that he can normally, but when Will is sleep deprived, he's spouting secrets he doesn't even know he knew.  

He tucks himself into bed, in soft pajamas with his hair freshly dried. The room is quiet; Austin goes asleep fast, and his sheets rustle around him as he moves. But Will can't sleep. He tosses and turns all night, thinking of his time with Nico, the worry that cloaks him, and the eyes that seem to always be watching him, no matter where he goes.

Hi guys, I have a super important announcement that's super special to me! I don't know if anyone remembers but at the beginning of the year I mentioned that I was publishing a book and it's finally up for pre-order! For some reason I couldn't post the link here but it's in my bio if you guys wanna check it out! It's basically a gay coming of age story(so what I post on here but longer) that focuses on growing up, sexuality, parental relationships, and a bunch of other stuff(I suck at explaining it and I'm sorry!) but if you want to check it out it would mean the world to me! I think they only ship to places in the US, so if there's anyone outside of the US reading this I'm really sorry! No pressure to buy of course but all the proceeds to go a writing non-profit, and I'm really proud of it. Thank you SO much to anyone who took the time to read this, if you want to check it out or read a more comprehensive description, the link is in my bio:)

Nina