Theon could feel his heart beating out of his chest as he made his way to the throne room. He was just afraid of what Jon might say to him. 

As he walked into the throne room, Davos and Jon were walking out. 

"Jon." Theon called out to him. 

The pair both turned to look at him, "Can I speak with you?"

At first, Jon didn't say anything. Theon was scared he would say no. 

"All right." He finally let out. Davos turned to exit the throne room. 

Theon walked down the step towards him, "What you did in King's Landing, what you said..."

"You could have lied to Cersei about bending the knee to Daenerys." Theon continued down a few more steps, even though Jon looked at him coldly, "You risked everything to tell an enemy the truth."

"We went down there to make peace and it seems to me we need to be honest with each other if we're going to fight together." Jon was so sure in his words. 

Theon stood there for a moment, "You've always known what was right." It was true. It was something Theon desperately wished he had. 

"Even when we were all young and stupid, you always knew. Every step you take, it's always the right step." Theon replied. 

"It's not." Jon said bluntly, "It may seem that way from the outside but I promise you, it's not true." In a way, it comforted Theon but he didn't know what to say in response. 

"I've done plenty of things I regret." Jon continued. 

"Not compared to me you haven't."

"No," Jon was still cold, "Not compared to you."

Theon looked to the stone floor. He wasn't quite sure what he should say. He knew from Jon's voice that he still held resentment against him. Theon didn't blame him. 

He took the last few steps down to be on the same level as Jon, "I've always wanted to do the right thing." The cold echoes filled the dark throne room.

"Be the right kind of person. But I never knew what that meant." Theon didn't look at Jon. He wasn't quite sure if he wanted to see his reaction. "It always seemed like there's..." 

Finally admitting it was wrenching on Theon's heart. A pit in his throat grew as he felt like he could cry from saying everything out loud. He swallowed the pit in his throat. 

"Like there was an impossible choice I had to make." Theon finally forced himself to met Jon's eyes, "Stark or Greyjoy."

Jon took two fast steps toward him. Theon could feel his intensity, "Our father was more of a father to you than yours ever was."

"He was." Theon admitted.

Jon skipped over his response, "And you betrayed him. Betrayed his memory."

Theon hated to hear the words in the air but he knew it was true, "I did."

Theon could tell that Jon was reining in his anger. He let out a short sigh, "But you never lost him. He's a part of you. Just like he's a part of me."

Theon didn't know if he could believe it. Jon had way more of Ned in him then Theon did. 

"But the things I've done..."

"It's not my place to forgive you for all of it. But what I can forgive, I do." It felt good for Theon to hear it from Jon. Part of the weight of his shoulders felt like it had been lifted. 

"You don't need to choose." Jon continued, "You're a Greyjoy and you're a Stark."

Theon felt the pit in throat return once again. He refused to let it surface. 

"When I was Ramsay's prisoner, Yara tried to save me." Theon thought of that night, "She was the only one who came for me." 

"She needs me now."

"So why are you still talking to me?" Jon and Theon looked at each other once more before Jon turned and walked out of the throne room. Theon was left alone with his thoughts. He felt like they echoed throughout the room. 

He knew who he had to talk to now. 

He knew it wouldn't be easy. 

--

"Theon, they are all getting ready to leave." Tara was relieved when she finally found him. She had gone for a walk and saw the Ironborn starting to load up. 

Theon didn't stop walking. He knew if he did, he would have second thoughts. "I know." Theon was determined. 

Tara was more concerned. She was afraid it wouldn't go well. The two of them started the long walk towards the beach. 

"I have to talk to them." Theon started, "I have to. For Yara."

Tara nodded, "If anyone can get them to listen, it's you."

Theon did not stop his determined walk towards the shore. Tara was having difficulty just keeping up with him. When they were about to reach the beach, that's when Tara stopped him. 

"Theon, wait." She put her hand on his shoulder to slow him. Theon finally stopped moving for a second. He turned back to face her. 

Tara collected her thoughts. A part of her wanted to stop him altogether. She just was afraid of what might happen but she knew this was something he had to do. 

"Just-" She started, "Please be careful."

Theon met her soft eyes. He could see all of her concern for him. He nodded, "I will be."

She mirrored him back and nodded as well. 

"I have to go alone." 

"I know you do." Tara responded back. She let out a sad smile. 

Theon pulled her into towards him. Tara was glad he did. They both held each other for a moment while the sea air blew around them. The sound of the waves filled their ears. Even amongst what felt like chaos, this was a moment of calm for them both. 

Theon was the one that pulled away. Their eyes met once more before he started his way down to the men. 

Even though Tara knew Theon had to go alone, she stayed where she was and watched him from the cliff above. She refused to leave him completely alone. 

Theon walked through the sand towards the Ironborn men. They were all getting ready to leave. 

Harrag, the man that had caught onto Theon lies before, gave all of the men directions. As Theon approached, the men all started to turn towards him. Theon felt the need to run away, but he pushed his cowardly instincts back down. He kept Yara in the front of his mind. This was for her and he wouldn't leave her again. 

All the men watched Theon. They were waiting for him to start. 

"All of choose to follow Yara." Theon began as strongly as he could. He had to be confident, "We left the Iron Islands for Yara. She would never leave one of us behind." Theon looked right at Harrag, "We're not leaving her behind."

"You're sister's dead."

"She's not dead."

"She's dead. Even if Euron hasn't cut her throat yet, she's dead." It was Harrag. 

"She's our queen." Theon stayed strong.

"She's your sister and you left her to die." He was menacing in his tone. Theon didn't let it affect him. 

"I did." Theon was honest, "I ran from my uncle. I was a coward."

"So why in fuck's name should we listen to you?" Harrag retorted, "They say the dead can't swim. We're gonna sail east, find a nice, quiet island, kill all the men and take their wives for ourselves."

"We're done with all that." Theon was still confident. 

"Who says we are?"

"Yara did. She made a pledge." Harrag looked back at Theon angrily. 

"We're going to find her and we're going to set her free."

Harrag's face twisted into an ugly scowl. He spit onto Theon's face. Some of the men behind him laughed. As Theon wiped the spit from his cheek, he pushed his tendencies out of his mind. He refused to be a coward this time. 

"Run away little Theon. It's what you do best." Harrag teased him. 

Theon didn't move. He stayed in the exact same spot. 

That's when Harrag threw a punch across his face. As the men cheered, Theon stumbled back. He tried to throw a punch back at Harrag but Harrag dodged it. Harrag swiftly kicked him in the face while Theon was disoriented. His cheeks stung but he kept going. 

Theon tried to hit him once again but Harrag grabbed him and threw him to the sand. Theon didn't let himself stay down for long. He stumbled back up and tried yet again to hit Harrag. Harrag grabbed both his arms and held him there before he headbutted him hard. 

Theon could hear the men encouraging Harrag, but he pushed it out of his head. As he stumbled back from the hit, Harrag hit him yet again. Theon met the sand once more. His head was spinning but he made himself stand. He didn't waste any time and ran towards Harrag.

He grabbed his torso and tried to push him back but Harrag didn't budge. Harrag brought down a strike onto his back and then kneed him in the face. Theon could feel blood trickling down his mouth. Harrag grabbed him by the shirt and punched him across the face. Theon was knocked down to the ground. 

Theon let out grunts of pain into the sand. His face was battered badly but he knew he had felt much worse pain. 

Tara watched from the cliffs. Her heart hurt to watch Theon struggle but she knew there was nothing she could do at the moment. A part of her hoped he would not stand back up. 

"Stay down!"Harrag yelled at Theon, "Or I'll kill you."

Theon didn't listen. He wobbled to his feet. Compared to Ramsay's torture, this was minimal. Harrag struck him yet again. 

Theon landed on the sand on his back. The throbbing was spreading to all over his body. He laid there for a moment, looking to the sky. 

"I said stay down or I'll kill you!" Harrag said through heavy breaths. He was tiring out. 

His legs were still wobbling beneath him, but Theon pushed himself up to stand. The pain made time feel like it was slowing. 

The pain he felt was all too familiar. 

The night Tara helped him escape flooded into his mind. The screws in his feet, the blood gathering in a pool beneath him, the wooden x. 

Tara helped him stumble through that sewer. He remembered the excruciating pain sending its way down his legs. He remembered how foggy his brain was. He was so close to passing out but he knew they would never escape if he did. 

Mostly, he remembered looking through the sewer grate to the outside. That's when he saw the night sky again. He was so sure that he would never see the stars ever again. It was feeling he knew he would never forget for the rest of his life. 

Theon wish he didn't but now his mind was moving to Ramsay. That terrible grin he had. 

Theon looked down at his hands. Each piece had been flayed and peeled. His hand was so mangled that he didn't even recognize it as his own. The pain shot up numbly through his whole body. 

Now, it was Tara. He remembered her bruised and bloody face looking up at him. Her hair was matted and her clothes were ripped but Theon focused on her eyes. Her soft eyes were the only thing he recognized. 

And it was Ramsay who did all of this. The pain he felt shooting through him he had known before. The flaying and peeling and pain and carving. It was all coming from Ramsay's grin.

Theon saw Ramsay's smile plastered on Harrag's face. Before, it would have terrified him. It was the same feeling that caused him to jump overboard into the cold sea water. But not this time. 

The smile looked back at him and instead he felt strong. The pain wasn't throbbing anymore, his legs weren't wobbling. This was all pain he had survived before. 

Theon now threw himself at the grin. Harrag was thrown off guard and now he was the one buried in the sand. 

Theon climbed onto of him and that's when he started hitting. 

He threw punches across that stupid grin until it was no more. All that was left was a bloodied mess. 

Theon fell back into the sand from exhaustion. He had a moment of strength but now most of it had dissipated. Theon could feel the Ironborn's eyes on him though so he pushed himself to stand one last time. He lost his balance but an Ironborn caught him and kept him standing. 

"Not for me." Theon breathed, "For Yara!" The men called her name in agreement. 

Theon stumbled towards the waves crashing on the sand. He let himself get on one knee in the salt water. Blood was dripping from his face and meeting in the sea foam. He watched the two colors swirl and combine before he splashed the water on his face. 

It stung, but in the best possible way. 

--

Thank you all for 1k votes on this story! That's amazing

I think we are all caught up now with the show (I can't believe I have written this much) so I'll see you all in the next season :)

As always thanks for reading!