Ella 36

"That was a load," Hilde, I've learned her name, slams down her bow against the ground. I expect it to shatter, and so I nearly leap out of my shoes.

"It's fine," her voice is still shaking, but Saph manages to find a sturdiness with her that doesn't break to the darkness.

People are moving all around me. It is the middle of the day, but it feels like night. Everyone around me is only apparently in the waves of sound and touch with bounce off me. I'm forced to concentrate on names and faces, trying to remain in this world. I want to stay here for her. She's beside me, and very tired. Lagging. I want to see her face, but I don't want her to see mine.

She teeters on her feet. I take her arm and wrap it tightly around mine. She must keep a float, or I will lose her. I couldn't bear that. It would be a fate worse than death.

"I told you," Teresa mutters, her voice low. "Could you wait two days though? No."

"Shack that, he's gone!" Harriet shouts, for once her panic betraying her. "He wasn't there. Michelle almost killed Saph. There were at least fifteen of them. You were wrong."

"No, she wasn't," one of the boys I don't know corrects.

Teresa clicks on a flashlight and catches a glimpse of a boy. I don't know his name, nor who he is. She gestures for him to continue talking as she studies him.

"Lott and I had just shown up, with Leo and Beth. Michelle wasn't with them either. We don't know where she popped up from."

"I told you that Aris told me there was eleven," Teresa adds. Her voice is icy. "It isn't his fault that everybody else showed up."

She takes a step backwards, flashing the light across the faces of the newcomers. I don't know their names, and I couldn't remember them if I tried. It's harder to see people in the dark. It's also easier, because every colour they exude is darkened until it is beyond recognition.

Of course, except Sonya's. She radiates lilac and lavender. Sweet and soft. Her skin against mine is like silk. It's a blanket which I have long needed, made with delicate hands. Almost as if she is just for me and no one else.

"So, now what?" Harriet asks. "I'm not sending my girls back to die."

"Well, then they will die anyway," Teresa argues. "Even Ella would agree that Thomas is rotten, and she wants nothing to do with me."

I can feel their eyes on me, even if they can't see me. Sonya squeezes me. I nod my head, slowly. Thomas is awful, and no good, and I don't like Teresa. I wonder if she remembers what I said to her while she was in a coma.

I open my eyes, and she nods. She must remember.

She will get me out of the Scorch with Sonya, no matter the cost. If it means her life, or Thomas's, or any other person we have come across. My hatred for Teresa must take a backseat, in favour of Sonya.

"I'd kill him with my bare hands," I begin, eyes scanning the room.

Sonya's grip on me loosens. Harriet flinches, taking a step back. One of the girls (Hilde, I remind myself her name is Hilde) offers up a fist in front of me. I hit it with my own, sure it is what I am supposed to do. Hilde laughs, leaning over and ruffling my hair. I wonder if I look younger than I am.

Hilde looks like she could be 17. I'm 15. I remember that. So is Sonya, but even she is a bit taller than I am.

"So, we move at dawn," Teresa instructs. Her eyes flick over to Harriet and her nose scrunches. "Again."

"We aren't going to catch them off guard again," Harriet argues, pressing forward.

Teresa and Harriet are practically chest to chest. I wait for a hit, or a slap, or any sound other than silence. None comes.

"We are following the plan, the way WICKED wants us to," she affirms, looking at the girls around us. "People keep dying because of you."

"Who even is this chick?" One of the girls behind us calls out. "Since when does one person call the shots?"

Teresa moves over to the girl, pushing past all of us. I expect her to hit her too, but she doesn't. She simply looks the girl in the face. I watch the new girl swallow.

"You are Beth, right?" Teresa asks.

I notice Saph to the side of the new girl. Dangerously close, but not moving. Even she is willing to turn away from Teresa. All of those that have crossed Teresa are dead or gone, with the exception of me. Dawn, Leo, Michelle, and Marie.

Now, Harriet has added her name to this list. I can take or leave the others. It feels like I am watching a side show while the main action escapes me.

"Well, Beth, this is important," Teresa manages. "Every time we break from the plan, someone gets hurt. We went to the surface. Eleven girls died. We went looking for Ella, and Sonya was attacked. Most recently, you had a problem with Michelle. I've seen her kill people with my own eyes. With a group of boys, including Thomas, she tried to break into the Slammer to kill me. She killed a man. You're lucky Saph is alive after Michelle had her way."

Teresa pulls back, waiting for any argument. No one can disagree though. No one was there when Teresa was in the Slammer. I don't remember that day, but I'm not going to argue with her. If she loses power, they won't kill Thomas. I won't let us die. I won't let Sonya collapse.

"So, we go back up, just like WICKED told us," Teresa argues. "I call the shots."

"What's so different about that from what we did?" Another voice asks.

"We approach them with weapons," Teresa begins. "We shoot one of them and threaten to kill the rest if Thomas doesn't come."

Sonya clings on to me, tighter now. I turn to face her. She stumbles backwards, landing on her knees. Her hands dig into the dirt below us, gripping for something that isn't there.

She vomits. I can smell it, but I can't see the colour. It's putrid. She's done this before, but now I can hear her throat being torn apart. Her skin is warm when I reach for her.

"Klunk," Teresa mutters, dropping to her knees. She puts an arm around Sonya, trying to hold her up. Sonya drops to the ground, rolling on to her back. Teresa rolls her back on to her side. Her hair falls in the vomit as she continues to throw up.

"What's going on?" One of the boys asks. He is approaching us.

"It's infected for sure," Teresa backs away. She gestures to Sonya's head.

More yellow pus seeps out. It blends into her straw-coloured hair. When Teresa shines a flashlight on the wound, I move the hair. The cut is swollen, and red, and it seems to spread all over her head.

"What do we do?" Harriet asks. "We can't leave her."

"Why do you think I'm so keen on leaving her? I'm the only one here who is trying to save her life," Teresa sighs, clicking off the flashlight. We are about to run out of batteries, and I've heard we are moving through the mountains next. Tomorrow.

"We need to keep moving," Hilde jumps in. "We need to intercept the boys at the base of the mountain."

"Get those two lugs to take turns carrying her," Teresa gestures to the boys who have just shown up. She huffs, brushing hair out of her face. Her icy blue eyes land on mine, if only for a second. "We will all be dead if we don't make it to Thomas in the morning. Besides, we can just take back Leo. She'll be able to help."

"How do we know he's going to be there?" One of the voices asks. "He was gone today. They said he was shot."

"WICKED will have healed him," Teresa shrugs, walking forward. The two boys steal Sonya out from within my arms. The few people who have dropped supplies continue forward, walking away. I struggle to my feet to follow them. "That's why they took him, probably. WICKED doesn't change their plans. We can grab him tomorrow."

"If not?" Harriet asks.

Teresa doesn't turn to face her. Instead she looks at me. "If not, Leo will keep her alive, at least. If we are stuck in the Scorch until we become Cranks, I'll make sure Sonya lives until then."

Teresa, for a second, breaks. She offers me a faint smile. It stops me cold in my shoes. I can't move, or think. What is she talking about? Since when does she care about them? Probably since she realised I would help her to save Sonya. Probably since I didn't leave to go back to the boys.

Maybe since she is more than she seems.