"LOGIE!!"

Logan was just walking out of History class when Patton came up behind him and wrapped his arms around Logan's shoulders. Logan scoffed at his behavior.

"Hello, Pat."

It had been two months since Patton first came to school and Logan was amazed at his determination to be everyone's friend. He had already convinced three bullies to be better people, told off two players, and comforted 5 people who broke down, not counting the 8 panic attacks he helped Virgil get over. 

Patton let go of Logan and spun him around, face set in determination. "I need your help on an epic quest!"

Logan raised an eyebrow. "Oh, really? And what is this great adventure you have in mind?"

Patton grinned and spun Logan around again, making him a bit dizzy. "Look at Ro and Virgil!"

Logan steadied himself and saw Roman and Virgil talking to eachother. Over the commotion of other students, he could make out their conversation.

"Why are you avoiding me?" Asked Roman.

"Why are you trying to talk to me?" Countered Virgil.

"Because you are cute and I'm petty!" Roman replied, not even joking. Virgil laughed.

"What are you laughing at, hot topic?"

Virgil looked him right in the eye, got super close to him and sneered, "Aww, you think I'm hot."

He then walked away without another word, leaving Roman blushing and frustrated.

Logan chuckled. "Looks like them."

Patton sighed. "I knooow. It's so saaaaaad! I know Virgil likes him, but he's just too closed up!"

Logan turned back towards Patton. "What do you suggest we do about it?"

Patton grinned mischievously. "We lock them in a room and come back half an hour later hoping they have sorted it out!"

Logan gawked at him. "Patton, no! We can't just lock people in a room and hope they get along! They would tear each other to pieces!"

Patton crossed his arms and huffed. "Then what do you say we do?"

Logan thought for a moment. "Well, they obviously like eachother. The problem is that they won't stay in the same place long enough to talk about it. Roman tries, of course, but his straight-forward methods drive Virgil away quickly. We need to force them to stay in the same place for a while, and talk. The only way to do that would be to lock-" He realized what he was saying and sighed, rubbing his temples. "You were right. You are always right."

Patton bounced in triumph. "And I will always be right. Roman's brother could probably help us out!"

Logan gulped. "Remus? Are you sure?"

Roman's twin, Remus, looked mostly like Roman except he had a mustache and must have been dropped on his head as a child. He knew all kinds of insane, disturbing facts that would give a murderer nightmares. Logan had found Remus's actions and behavior to be irrational, which was part of the reason why he had helped Roman set Remus up with Janus, a down-to-earth boy who could help keep Remus in check.

Patton smiled. "Yup. I met him the other day on the way back from school."

Logan sighed but agreed. "I guess helping you with your quest couldn't hurt. I don't suppose Roman would mind it, but Virgil will most certainly kick our asses when he gets out."

Patton took Logan by the tie and started dragging him down the hallway. "Language! And also, Virgil would never hurt his dear old dad. You are the only one getting kicked."

Remus agreed to help them. He had access to the attic of their house, which was empty and locked from the outside. Roman wasn't allowed to have the key to it because he used to use it to sing alone. The attic was nowhere near soundproof. Patton alone was able to get Roman to go to the attic by saying "Remus is trying to do that thing again in the attic." Neither Logan or Patton knew what "that thing" even meant, but knowing Remus, they suspected it might work. Strangely enough, before Roman went into the attic he yelled, "GET THE BUCKET OF ICE!"

Virgil was another story. Patton said "Hey, come with me!" And Virgil followed, but then he recognized Roman's house and stopped. 

"What are you trying to pull?" 

Patton tried to think of something to say, but Logan's quick thinking saved the day. 

"We aren't trying to 'pull' anything. This is specifically for the purpose of interceding a relationship which may or may not even exist, we simply want to ambuscade you and another in an accomadation for the sake of your responsiveness."

Which made no sense to Virgil, but Logan's use of big words seemed to throw him off. The sentence he had used in simpler form was, 

'This is so we can play matchmaker with you and Roman in a room of the house for the sake of your emotions.'

Virgil allowed them to lead him into the house, but when he realized what was happening, he started fighting back. Patton and Logan had to throw him into the attic. Remus helped lock the door and handed them the keys. "Good luck, and when Virgil gets out, may god have mercy on your soul."

Patton pressed his face up to the wood door an yelled, "HEY IN THERE! YOU TWO HAVE HALF AN HOUR TO SORT THINGS OUT OR WE LOCK YOU IN FOR DOUBLE THE TIME. IF YOU NEED CONTEXT, ROMAN LOVES VIRGIL AND VIRGIL IS IN DENIAL!"

They heard a series of muffled yells from inside the attic, but one that Logan could make out was "YOU ARE DEAD! YOU ARE SO F*ING DEAD!"

It took about 10 minutes for the yelling to die down. Logan could tell they were talking, but neither Pat or Logan could tell what was being said. They were sitting outside the attic door, on the steps.

Patton shivered. "It's kind of cold, isn't it? Where's the AC?" 

Logan banged on the door. "Um, Where is the AC? Pat is cold."

Roman yelled a distinct "Go f*ck yourself." from the attic.

Logan sighed and looked around the house. When he found the thermostat, he saw it had a plastic case on it with a sticky note that said 'Remus, stop trying to burn us alive!'

Logan made his way back to the steps and sat down. "Er, the thermostat is shielded."

Patton nodded and rubbed his arms.

Logan internally cursed himself for having a crush on such a cute person and took his jacket off. He wrapped it around Patton. "Here- You are lucky that I'm temperature resilient."

Patton smiled gratefully. "No, I'm lucky I have such a great friend." 

The words settle strangely in Logan's mind. He was grateful for the statement, but the word 'Friend' stuck like glue in his head.

After 30 mins had passed, they opened up the door to the attic. Logan braced himself and looked inside, expecting someone to come out and tackle him.

He heard Patton gasp.

Logan looked to find Roman and Virgil sitting against the wall next to each other, With Virgil's head on Roman's shoulder. They were both asleep.

Patton squealed as quietly as possible as to not wake them up. "Look at them! Look at them! Isn't that so CUTE? They probably confessed, oh my goodness!"

Logan couldn't believe this actually worked. He also couldn't believe neither of them had called the cops. This might have technically been kidnapping, but Logan wasn't sure.

Patton turned to Logan. "What now?"

Logan adjusted his glasses. "I suppose we get out of here before one of them wakes up and kicks our asses."

Patton grinned. "Oh, right."

They went out of the attic and told Remus what had happened. He laughed and said he would be sure not to bother them, not before making some inappropriate jokes about what might have gone on up there. Patton and Logan left the house and Logan checked his phone.

"It's 6:20. Should we-"

But he was cut off. "6:20? We were in there for that long? Oh, no!"

Patton pulled out his phone and muttered, "Shoot. I have to go. I'm sorry, Logie, this was awesome, but I will see you tomorrow!"

Patton gave Logan one last hug and started jogging down the street.

"...Bye." Logan said dejectedly. He then realized Patton still had his jacket.