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Cookingmama: A beautiful picture of Joonie and I with our least favourite child 👹🐰

212.4k comments... 

kingkook: I know you're just trying to spare everyone else's feelings so I am taking absolutely 0 offence to the incorrect description :) 

taestyv: @/kingkook Plus you look fire in this pic #nohomo

kingkook: @/taestyv Thanks bro #nohomoallbromo 

smolchim: @/kingkook @/taestv You both make me want to slam my face into a brick wall. Plus, we all know that I'm the favourite child. 

taestyv: @/smolchim Excuse me? I think you'll find that it's actually me 

cookingmama: @/taestyv Taehyung you know you lost your title after what you did last week 

taestyv: Oh COME ON. You're actually still mad about that? 

kingkook: What did Tae do?! 

smolchim: ^^

hobitheunicorn: ^^^

lilmeowmeow: ^^^^

cookingmama: @/kingkook @/smolchim @/hobitheunicorn @/lilmeowmeow Long story cut very short, Taehyung borrowed my laptop last time he was invited over and thought it would be absolutely hilarious to leave a webpage open displaying a video of two tortoises engaging in intercourse. Now, Namjoon comes home and goes on said laptop, obviously immediately questioning the video to which Taehyung pretends he knows absoloutely nothing about and starts to shame me for my apparent 'tortoise kink'. 

kingkook: @/taestyv Fucking legend 

taestyv: @/kingkook It was definitely one of my finest moments 

cookingmama: @/taestyv One of your finest moments? NAMJOON OFFERED TO BUY A COSTUME TO INDULGE MY KINK. 

taestyv: We love a supportive boyfriend 😔✊ 

cookingmama: @/taestyv Do not make me put you up for adoption. 

joonwiththespoon: Does this mean you don't want me to rent the costume? Because I've just got off the phone to someone with a teenage mutant ninja tutle costume for hire... 

kingkook: @/joonwiththespoon His kink is tortoises not turtles so you should keep looking pal 

cookingmama: @/kingkook This is why you're the least favourite

cookingmama: @/joonwiththespoon OF COURSE I DON'T WANT YOU TO RENT THE COSTUME 

kingkook: Wait wait... if Tae did this then how comes I'm still the least favourite? 

cookingmama: @/kingkook Taehyung could set a bag of kittens on fire and still be above you in the rankings 

kingkook: Wow your words really do cut me deep 

joonwiththespoon: Just for the record, do you not want me to rent the costume because you DON'T have a tortoise kink or because I'm looking at the wrong species? 

taestyv: @/joonwiththespoon He definitely has the kink so keep looking 

cookingmama: @/taestyv You are on very thin ice, Taehyung. 

cookingmama: @/joonwiththespoon Please Joonie, forget the costume. For the love of all things holy.