live-artistically

Here we are, in the next round of blah, blah reviews!!! YAY!! *Jumps, and twirls flyers* It's my greatest joy to chomp, and chew up authors stories and swallow them and make my stomach tingle with their need of more review lol..

So here we go~~~ANYWAYS, LETS BEGIN THE TORTURE!!

Summary

{''The story of a wild boy with a broken heart.''

Meet Pit, a 16 year old boy in love with black cigarettes and lilac skies. Everyone knows him as the cute goofy guy who hangs out with the popular crowd, but no one knows what hides beneath that surface. With his friends always trying to drag him into their abyss and a desperate need to fit in, Pit struggles to be who he really is. But a lost nerdy friend and a girl with flowers beneath her skin don't seem so eager to give up on him.

Will the reckless boy ever find himself or has 'wild youth' become his only everlasting anthem?}

Chapter One

The "Dear Passenger" opening is good, though it does use the old-as-time theme of misunderstood teen. Still though it's been done a lot, it was a nice welcome to the character. And I applaud the nifty use of vocabulary.

You are not a bad hand at description, it's not a wonder as to why this author has 10k readers, and the idea is original...well, for me I don't much like reading about the troubled popular kids. It's not my umm, *cough, hacks* favorite. *Clears throat, after saying something nice*

I like how you've quickly introduced the characters and their appearances, with dragging me through an hour of paragraph about their looks.... though technically you did, it didn't read, or feel that way.

This isn't an arduous read, but I do wonder the time period, because it definitely makes me think of grease.

I'm also intrigued about Dario and his issues, Gaias cold attitude.

Chapter Two

After reading this chapter, I've come to realize that this may be the pivotal moment where the main character will start to change, or run away. I'm not quite sure how, but the ending sentence, and the way the teacher behaves is a clear signal that the character will have issues later in choosing between his new, and old friends.

I would love to be cracking jokes, and of course my standard mockery but this story fails to give me the leeway to do so, it's funny and there are jokes but it's not really funny, like I instinctually just feel pity for the main character if I had to color this story, it would be a rust gold grey, the kind where the stories goal shouldn't be happily ever after, but more.

And honestly I don't think that Gaia girl is going to be the chick he ends up with...at least I hope not. I mean *rolls eyes* she's not complicated at all, just pretty and well an easy girl to idolize.

Chapter three

...So, her skin color is black? Black, right? Galaxy means black...right? With green eyes...okay, will that be explained later?'

The third chapter wasn't really long, but it's kind of obvious that Noemi and Pit (the main male character) will have something soon, but she's EEEK! Too sweet, I mean the flowery language I think, personally should be notched down...just a tad. I get it, I get it, you have the ability but it's make my molars hurt.

And why "Scream" and not "yelled" I think yelling would be more like what they're doing, rather than screaming. I noticed someone mentioned that Gaia was the "Strong-silent-type" but I didn't see that, all I could imagine is some pretty chick with resting bitch face.

I mean reading between the flower, I gotta a crush on this girl monologue she doesn't seem not to like him. If she's all that complicated, I think she's probably a most simple character, and I think Pit is cute, bu~~~t, his monologue isn't very manly...it sounds more like a girl who has a crush, than a guy with a crush.

It's like missing a dude quality to it.

And hope the teacher's attitude will be explained later in the story, because that could be interesting as well.

As I always do, I'm leaving the story here, at this place the third chapter.

This story I think meets a certain taste, the word I can only come up with is Hipster...it has a hipster vibe to it, and the word I thinks relate to this is INTERESTING, yeah that's the word.

I think this is best served with hot coffee, with crème and a fresh baked pastry.

Should you only take my opinion, NO—NO, go check it out yourself. LIKE HURRICANES!

SYWAR OUT!!

IC