"Damn it Ray!" Mom kicked uncle's leg when she found out he ate the bag of Cheetos she brought and didn't leave some for us. They were currently sprawled on the couch, with uncle sitting on the edge and mom lying down on the opposite side, her legs placed on his lap comfortably.

Uncle Ray was snickering as he swatted mom's feet away, but my mother was persistent. A short battle of the feet and hands went on, and in the end, uncle got kicked in the face.

I laughed out loud, in the middle of that gory movie.

Not particularly new in any case.

"Damn it Paige!" He whined, rubbing his jaw. Mom withdrew her legs and rubbed her feet as well.

"What's your beard made of? Cactus? It itches."

I sighed happily on the floor and tried to ignore my lovely guardians behind me. Mom kept shooting sarcastic comments about uncle's beard and uncle kept whining about his jaw and how he felt sad about getting kicked around by his best friend since high school.

I kept quiet the whole conversation, slowly sinking into my own conscience. Do I kick Leo around and stuff? I think I'm pretty nice to him.

And as soon as I thought that, I get hit by a shitload of memories where I was not at all kind to him.

Well. Damn.

I am my mother's daughter.

The movie was pretty much forgotten. All of us cleaned the mess afterwards and went to the kitchen to find something to eat. Again.

Mom grabbed some bacon in uncle's fridge and went to fry them. She knew exactly where everything was.

Me, at a loss for words in front of my very mature mom and uncle, decided to be an obedient little potato by patiently waiting for the wonderful bacon to get served.

Uncle sat beside me on the dinner table and then he gave me a sheepish grin. I eyed him knowingly, because I know he was gonna say something that'll get me worked up.

"So," he started, flashing me his perfect teeth. Sometimes I wonder if he wears dentures. I adjusted my position in my seat to face him directly. "You and Brandon."

I didn't realize my cheeks flame until I felt the heat rise in my face. How did I know my traitorous cheeks flamed? Why, the damn smug grin on my uncle's face said it all.

I nonchalantly avoided his eyes and hid part of my face in my hair. Like, yeah, why wouldn't I? It's not like I'm gonna make it any more obvious. I mean. Why the hell am being so awkward?

He chuckled softly, looking very pleased with my reaction. "I knew there was something going on between you two the moment you kicked his nuts and went straight to my office for some ice."

"Uncle!" I whined, literally shutting him up by slapping his mouth with the table napkin. My hand moved on it's own accord. Swear.

He was unfazed. He was probably used to the same treatment from my mom since they were my age. I don't know why I keep feeling so bad for Leo every time I acknowledge mom and uncle's relationship.

"So?" He pressed, ignoring the fact that I just napkin-slapped him. "Are you going to talk to him?"

"Uugh..." I buried my face in my hands. Not for the reason that I was flustered by my uncle's choice of subject, but because I know how much of a coward I am to even look at Brandon, much more talk to him. "What's the point of talking about this?" I told the man dejectedly. "I know I screwed up. It was such a tiny issue, I don't know how it got so big. I don't know how one minute we were laughing, and then the next minute, it was so tense and cold. It's my fault. I screwed up big time."

I groaned internally. Why. Why am I blowing another bubble of negativity? What was I thinking, 'temporarily putting my problems aside'? I didn't put them aside at all. They were stuck in my mind the whole time since this morning, I just didn't want to confront them.

Uncle offered me a smile as he pinched my cheek. I winced and stared at him weirdly. "Our baby's finally turning into a girl."

"What." I didn't know if I should feel confused or offended.

"You finally talked to me about a boy in a non-violent way. And that boy made you like this. You really like him. This is great. Fantastic."

I stared at him again, my brows creased to their extent and my hands doing weird motions in the air. "Did you hear what I just said? We got into a fight! We might not talk to each other anymore!"

"Yeah," he replied patiently, which was actually starting to piss me off. "But that's only for now. You two always make up, right?"

I stopped and thought about it.

Looking back at all our dumb fights and arguments and fights that didn't seem like fights, we always made up. It lit up a bit of hope in me but then I remembered. Last night was different. I don't understand. It was just a small thing, just a small, simple question. How did it get so complicated?

"Bacon's done." Mom announced as she placed the plate in the middle of the table and gave each of us a fork. She gave me a worried gaze before she flicked uncle's forehead.

"Ow!" He shot mom a glare. Whoa dude, that sounded painful. Mom's flick was pretty deadly. A hundred times worse than mine. "Why'd you do that?"

"Just felt like it," she shrugged her shoulders. I stifled a giggle, knowing that she did it for me. But despite that, I know uncle had a point. I was just too stubborn to admit it.

A lot of things spun inside my head. Emma with Brandon, Leo and Nichole's fight, Nichole's weird apology, my buttheadedness, the chocolate Sam stole from me, uncle's tasteless choice in clothing, dad and his new kid, Brandon, mom's advice, Emma's so pretty, my paper due on Monday, Brandon, how to talk to Nichole later, need to buy more chips, Brandon, potatoes, should I eat mashed potatoes for dinner, Brandon, cheese, Brandon, Brandon, Brandon...

Help me God. I need a new brain.

"Ah, I can see the smoke coming out of her ears," uncle said with a full mouth. "Her mind's overloading. Reminds me of you, Paige."

"Har har," mom mused, holding my shoulder at the process. "She's so much smarter than me. She'll know what to do."

I almost broke out a wail. I hope so mom. I hope so.

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°

No matter how much I prayed, no matter how many times I begged, the dreaded Monday still came. I know it was an impossible wish but I tend to be very illogical in logical situations.

I didn't speak to Nichole about her weird behavior two days ago since opening up such topic will probably lead to more awkwardness.

It's not like I'm gonna bury it. I'm just gonna wait for the right time to ask her about it. She and Leo looked fine now, but even I could feel the slight change of air between them.

Brandon didn't pick me up today, just as I had expected, but I still felt disappointed and guilty. It was my fault. I shouldn't feel so disappointed. I should be disappointed at myself.

Second period was almost over, still no sight of Brandon. I was so paranoid, looking left and right, wondering when he'll appear, and what I'll say when I see him, or what I'll do if he ignores me.

I hope I don't cry.

Cry.

"Psst," Sam called my attention in the middle of the lecture. I looked at him to ask what it was when he threw me something. I didn't know what it was until I caught it with a single hand. I was pretty good at catching stuff seeing as I used to play softball.

I snorted when I realized what it was. It was the same brand of chocolate he stole from our fridge last week. Nichole probably told him and made him feel guilty about it or something.

At the back of the chocolate bar, there was a tiny note that said: Sorry Mira. And insert sad face.

I supressed my laughter. I can't believe I think this is so adorable. I looked at him and gave him a smile. He looked relieved and then he sighed as if he was holding his breath the whole time. Sam was so nice, in his own way.

"Hey," I whispered as soon as the teacher turned around to write something on the board. "Did you see Brandon today?"

Sam nodded. "I think their coach called him and Leo. Last I saw them, they were heading for the pool."

I see. I see. They must be in trouble for skipping so many practices. So that's why. That makes sense. Yeah. Hm. Hm.

"Mira?" Sam said. "Did you guys fight?"

I stared at him in shock. Did Brandon tell him? "How did you know?"

He snickered. I glared. "I don't. I just asked. You always look so lost whenever you and Brandon fight, so I figured this time, it might be because of him again, and oh look, I'm right."

I knew I couldn't fight back because he was, but I was too stubborn to admit it. I just glared at him because I couldn't come up with anything good in my defense. So I did the mature thing.

That is glaring at him until my eyes hurt.

"Aww," he cooed, much to my annoyance. "She's upset."

I can't explain how much I want to kick his face right now. I don't need to hear that from him. In fact, I don't need to hear that from anyone. Ever.

The bell rang, and class was over. I hurriedly grabbed my bag and made my way outside the room. I need to find Brandon and talk to him.

That is assuming I could still talk properly when I see him.

"Want some help finding your boyfriend?" Sam offered with a teasing tone.

I rolled my eyes. "He's not my boyfriend."

He snorted. "But you're dating him."

"We're not dating - for real." I mumbled the last part. Well, we weren't right? I mean he did once say he wanted to date me seriously but he also said not now. So that means that technically, even though we're together doesn't mean we're together together and since that call that night, we can hardly call ourselves together and just by thinking how much I want us to be together together and not just together, it makes me want to punch myself in the gut and cry my eyes out altogether but I can't because right now I have to pull myself together.

Wow. That's a whole lot of togethers. I don't know how I made so much sense to myself in that mental ramble. Usually I talk nonsencial science in my head but now I think I deserve an A in English.

"Ow!" I yelled like the lady that I was when something flicked my forehead. More particularly, when someone hit my forehead.

I glared at Sam.

"What?" He said, a bit sceptical, hiding his hand behind his back. "You were staring into space again and you were gonna walk straight to the men's bathroom."

He motioned in front of us and I even noticed a group of boys staring and pointing at me, as if waiting to see if I'd really walk in the men's room with Sam. I concealed my blush with another glare.

Humiliation. Humiliation. Utter humiliation. Shit.

"And," he added. "Brandon's right over there."

As soon as I heard his name, all thoughts dissipated in my mind. I turned to the direction Sam's eyes pointed and I literelly felt my insides turn.

How can I clear things up with him? Should I just confess and get this all over with?

Still debating in my thoughts, I already left Sam and started walking towards a certain potato.

I don't know if he noticed me walking towards him or not. If he did, he was pretty damn good acting like he didn't.

Now that I was only a few steps closer to him, I felt my knees shake, and then the memories of our last conversation on the phone flooded my mind.

I'm such an idiot.

I was about to call his attention when his head slowly turned my way. My mouth was already open to call him, but as soon as he saw me, I shut my mouth and bit my tongue inside.

Genius.

He offered me a quiet smile and I couldn't help my brows crease in guilt. Why did he have to smile if he didn't mean it?

Both of us were waiting for the one who'll say something first. Me, being the one at fault, knew it had to be me to say something first. So I did.

"So..." I mumbled unsurely, nervously, pathetically - wow, the floor looks so interesting today. "What's up?"

Can the floor swallow me whole right now? I don't mind being part of the floor for a day. Or maybe like, forever.

He released a small sigh, but I think that was some kind of a forced laugh. I hate seeing us like this. So stupid.

"I'm fine, Mira. Hey listen, I gotta run. I just went to get a few things from my locker. Coach's waiting for me."

I quickly nodded my head, afraid he'll get mad at me if I asked him to stay. "Sure. See you at lunch?"

Again, he sent me another fake smile. "Yeah."

As soon as he walked away, I could feel my legs giving out. I couldn't help it. I felt like my heart was gonna explode. But if my heart did explode though, then my guts will be all over the floor. And then the floor won't be so nice and sparkly anymore. And then I'll have nothing to swallow me whole if I ever get into a situation like this again, which will probably be in the next few hours.

"Whoa there," a familiar, annoying voice said behind me. I felt something hold my shoulders firmly. When I turned around to see Sam, I realized that I couldn't feel my knees anymore, and I had no strength left in my hands or legs. He was holding me for support.

I gave him a pathetic look, one that roughly translates to I suck, I'm stupid, I'm a good-for-nothing gorilla and I'm gonna regret my whole existence.

He offered me an amused smile though, and then a kind one. He shook my shoulders gently as if to knock me out of my stupid thoughts and a good attempt to bring me back to my senses.

"You did great." He said, like he was praising a kid for passing a hard test. It sounded weird, but honestly, it was comforting to hear at the moment. I needed that.

"Thanks." I said, smiling at him.

He finally let go of my shoulders when I quickly regained my strength. "Any time. But are you just going to leave things like this between you two? He looked really torn to me."

I could feel my smile fading out my face. So even he could see it. I really am an idiot. I had to resist pulling my own hair and use it as a mop to clean the floor I theoretically messed up with the explosion of my guts earlier.

This is one of the moments where I hate my brain more than myself.

"There's still the thing with Nichole and Leo," I mumbled, remembering we were having lunch later. All of us. And Brandon. This is gonna be so awkward. The first time it's gonna be this awkward. I looked up at Sam with my regular pathetic look and I think he already knew what I meant. "Come with me please?"

He thought for a while. "Is Emma coming too?"

"Yeah well, she's with Brandon." I absent-mindedly replied. When I noticed that the tone I used was far from an non-bitter one, I quickly averted my gaze from Sam and attempted to be nonchalant about it. "So, you coming?"

"Alright," he sighed, but he sounded like he was supressing a laugh. Was he enjoying this, damn it? Well, whatever. He's helping me out in some way, in his own way. And that's good enough for me.

We still had another class to go before lunch. I'm so excited...

...to become floor-food.

God, help me overcome lunch please. Help me not to say anything stupid that'll jeopardize my relationship with my friends. Help me ignore the dumb part of my brain that'll make me think nonsencial science in hard situations again.

Help me resist offering myself as floor-food for the cafeteria, because the cafeteria floor stinks.

I stink.

Not literally of course.

"We're gonna be late. Are you gonna stare at the floor the entire day or?" Sam tugged my sleeve.

"Sorry I can only stare at something I can't be a part of," I said sarcastically, directing that statement to the lovely floor, and knowing Sam won't get what I meant. But looking at his expression, he looked like he was agreeing with me. Was that a bitter smile I see?

I faced the floor again as we made our way to our next class. Things are getting more and more confusing.

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°

A/N: I'M ALIVE!!! Just finished my midterms. Business Law was a drainer. Every right and wrong answer there will be multiplied by two. I honestly don't want to see my results.

Trivia: I'm sleepy and hungry and I don't know whether I should sleep first or eat first. But I have class in half an hour so I think I'll multi-task and do both.

I'm awesome like that.