Jude called a couple of hours later, letting us know that Cole would be okay.

"He hasn't overdosed?" I asked.

Jude shook his head. His chocolate curls were scraped back in a tight knot, but a couple had escaped and were hanging around his face.

"Fucking angel dust," he said.

Finn's expression cleared. "That shite always fucks him up."

Jude nodded.

"So he'll be okay?" I checked, feeling a weight lift from my shoulders.

I'd only met Cole briefly at a party at Jude and Camden's old loft, but he'd been so wasted I doubted he remembered. I didn't know him. Maybe it shouldn't have mattered so much to me but somehow it did. I loved his music, I loved his dad's music, but more importantly, I couldn't bear the thought of Cole dying young, like his dad before him. He'd been born into this life – the drugs and the drink and the chaos had been all he'd ever known, so it was hardly surprising he'd turned out the way he had, but I still wanted to believe he could overcome this. I wanted to believe there was a future for him. I couldn't forget that desperate hope in his voice when he'd asked Finn if they could talk later. Finn had said Cole wouldn't remember that, and he was probably right again. After all, he knew the guy a lot better than I did.

But I wanted Cole to survive this.

"What happened to the groupie?" Finn asked.

"I sent her home as soon as I got here," Jude said.

"You checked her phone first?"

Jude snorted. "Of course. I'm not an amateur."

For a moment I was confused, then realisation dawned on me. Cole's drugged and drunken antics always made for juicy headlines, especially the occasions when he'd collapsed in public. That groupie had been alone with him for hours – who the hell knew what kind of photos or videos she might have taken in that time? Maybe that was cynical, maybe that kind of seedy shit hadn't even occurred to her, but I couldn't blame the guys for thinking the worst. They'd seen so much of it.

"She didn't have anything," Jude added.

"Good."

"I'll probably have to stay at Cole's overnight now. It'll be getting dark soon, and Camden will kill me if I walk back in the dark."

"The dust?" Finn asked.

"Flushed it, and all his weed too."

Finn smiled grimly. "He's not going to be happy when he realises that."

"Tough fucking shit," Jude muttered. "I'd rather be at home with my wife than babysitting his sorry ass, but we don't all get what we want."

"I'll call Camden," I said, and moved away from Finn.

Jude would already have let her know what was going on, but I still needed to check in on her.

"Hey," Camden said when she answered. She tried to sound bright, but I could hear the flatness underneath.

"How are you doing?" I asked.

My sister sighed. "I'm okay, I just wish this wasn't so shit."

"Me too."

I hesitated, because something had just occurred to me and I wasn't sure how to phrase it. "This may be a stupid question, but is Jude . . . safe there?"

"What do you mean?"

"It's just, Cole obviously has a substance problem, and Jude said he'd thrown away all Cole's drugs, so . . ."

"Cole's not going to hurt Jude, if that's what you're asking," Camden said.

"Okay. Good."

"I still wish he was home though."

"Are you okay being by yourself?" I asked.

Camden laughed. "I don't have much choice, do I?"

"Not really."

"I'll be fine. Jude and I aren't joined at the hip, it's not like I'll die if we spend a night apart. But it's always nicer when he's here to snuggle with me and the dog and the peanut."

I heard a soft noise that was probably Camden stroking her baby bump.

"And I hate all the inevitable media drama that comes out of shit like this," Camden added.

I frowned. "Jude said he checked that groupie's phone and there was nothing on it."

"She's not the one I'm worried about," said Camden darkly.

"Okay, I'm confused."

Camden sighed. "Hold on."

I waited.

A couple of messages pinged on my phone, both from Camden. I opened them. They were both a little out of focus, taken in dim lighting, and showed a snow-choked street I didn't recognise. Cars lined the road on either side – at least half of them were parked illegally but in this snow, who gave a shit? – all buried under heavy white drifts, and dagger-sharp icicles hung from the eaves of buildings. Trudging down the snowy street was a man, a thick coat buttoned up to his neck, his hands in his pockets, a hat pulled low over his eyes. I looked closer, squinting at the chocolate curls escaping from under that hat.

"Is that Jude?" I said.

"Yep." Camden sounded flat again.

"Who took these photos?"

"No idea, but they're already circulating on social media, and the gossip hounds are already cooking up bullshit about why he was out there, what he was doing, where he was going. No doubt by tomorrow, there'll be stories that he cheated on me, that I kicked him out, that I cheated on him, and still kicked him out. Or maybe they'll come up with something more creative. You know how this shit works by now."

"Not as much as you do," I said quietly.

That was one big advantage of being isolated out here. There was no press, no sharp-eyed fans with cameras, no one to speculate or intrude or spread rumours. Whatever Finn and I had, it was ours.

I was reminded again why he'd chosen to live all the way out here by himself.

Finn came to stand beside me, and I fought the urge to lean against him. Camden couldn't see us, but it still felt too much like tempting fate.

"Will anyone know he was going to Cole's?" I asked.

"I don't know."

"Probably not," Finn said. "Cole lives in a gated house, and he likes his security as much as I do, so there's little chance of someone sneaking onto his property, and it's unlikely that anyone could have shadowed Jude through that snow without him realising."

I wanted to believe that meant the rumour mill couldn't spin completely out of control, but I knew better. Few people let facts get in the way of a good story.

I talked with Camden a little longer before ending the call. Then I melted into Finn's arms with a sigh. He stroked my hair, and suddenly it was hard to breathe.

This was just supposed to be sex.

We were fucking because we both liked each other, we both wanted to, and it was a really fun way to pass the time.

But it had stopped being just sex for me quite some time ago.

And I had no idea what to do about that.

***

Perhaps against my better judgement, I set up a news alert on my phone, anything to do with Jude Scott or Cole Roth. I tried to avoid this kind of thing since Camden married Jude because why the fuck would I want to see strangers bitch and moan and gossip about my family? Of course, I still saw stuff from time to time, it was unavoidable, and I'd seen snippets of bullshit about me too. Blocking certain words and topics on social media was good for my sanity.

But suddenly I needed to see it.

I needed to face the reality of fame, because it was too much a part of my life already, and it wasn't going to get any better. I needed to see it so I better understood what Jude and Camden went through on a daily basis, and also so I had a better appreciation for why Finn had secluded himself on this remote hilltop.

By the next morning, I had plenty of notifications.

Sitting in bed, pale winter light streaming through the window, I braced myself. This could get ugly.

I opened my notifications.

As Camden had predicted, people were talking about those photos of Jude, however indistinct they'd been. There was speculation about where he'd been going and why he was out in that weather. People criticised him for leaving Camden alone, others insisted he'd only have gone out for something important. Fangirls lamented that they couldn't see much of his face and, for some reason, one guy was extremely vocal about how much he hated Jude's hat.

A popular belief was that Camden must have pregnancy cravings and I read long threads praising Jude's bravery in risking a storm for her – even though it hadn't been storming when he went out – and equally long threads accusing him of being a terrible husband and almost-father for doing something as crazy as leave his house.

Then there were the discussions about what sort of cravings Camden might have. In some places these discussions quickly turned into women around the world sharing stories of their own weird cravings, and I disappeared down that rabbit hole for a while because it was actually kind of interesting.

That was an aspect of social media that I enjoyed – that people from different countries, different continents, could find common ground like this.

But other discussions stayed firmly focused on Camden and the cravings that these strangers had decided she must be having, and that was just weird to me.

Firstly, why did any of these people care? None of them knew Camden or Jude. None of this would make a shred of difference to these people's lives, and yet they spent hours discussing it, arguing about, insulting each other over it. It was weird as fuck.

Why did people get so invested in the lives of complete strangers just because they happened to be famous? I'd never understand it.

For the first time since Camden had announced, beaming and teary-eyed, that she was pregnant, I felt a cold niggle of worry. She and Jude had refused to make a public fanfare about the pregnancy, and I had no doubt that they'd shield their baby as much as possible from the darker aspects of their life, but he or she would be born into fame, into a world completely different to the average kid.

What impact would that have?

I thought of Cole, also born into fame, and his glassy, empty stare, his tired voice, and shook my head. Cole was like that because his dad had been.

Jude and Camden would never let that happen to their kid.

Then, as I was idly scrolling through all the bullshit, something caught my eye and my blood ran cold.

User pandagirl69 wanted to know why people were so interested in Camden Scott's pregnancy cravings and less interested in Finn Donovan's mysterious girlfriend.

Fucking what?

My finger froze, hovering over the screen, afraid to read more but knowing I had to.

Taking a deep breath, I scrolled down.

"Okay, this isn't that bad," I whispered.

Other users had questioned pandagirl69 but all she said was that she'd heard a rumour that Finn had a secret girlfriend. No, she didn't know the mystery girl's name. No, she didn't have a source. No, there weren't any photos. No, she wasn't actually a lying psycho bitch, just bored and talking crap online.

I put down my phone, my heart thumping.

It was possible it was coincidence, and this person, whoever she was, had just made up a rumour because that's how some people entertained themselves these days.

But it was a little too close to home.

I turned off the notifications.

When I got up to join Finn for breakfast he didn't mention it, so I didn't bring it up, but I couldn't shake the nagging feeling that this was more than a made-up rumour.

Somehow, someone knew about us.