"Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on Whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya." –  Google Images or Something

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"Hey! I haven't made much progress, but–"

"You promised."

"What are you talking about?"

"You promised me! You promised he wouldn't find out!"

"He who? Your boss?"

"You told him I was slacking off, didn't you? How our late night phone calls contributed to me not paying attention to my job? I can't believe it. You promised."

"I didn't, I swear. I haven't interacted with him for several days now."

"I'm on fucking probation! Do you know how close I am to being fired?"

"Mozzarella, calm down. It's okay."

"Don't! It's not– It's not okay! I need this job. I need it more than anything."

"You're going to keep the job. I'm going to do everything I can to help. I promise."

"Look how well your last promise turned out."

"For fuck's sake, I didn't breathe a word!"

"I don't think I can trust anything you say anymore."

"Even when I'm speaking the truth?"

"Especially then."

"You're despicable."

"You're a traitor."

"You want to hear a truth? Here's one. You're frigid. You're closed off. But this is uncalled for. You're a stone cold bitch, and I'm done playing nice."

"What exactly is your point?"

"You know why you got the master key? Those compliments from your boss? I kept sending in reviews. Almost every day. Singing your praises. Making you look perfect. So, have fun trying to keep your job without your trusty benefactor."

"I don't– I– I didn't need your help."

"Good, because now you're on your own."