(doing this took so much time, fuck)
(i expect you guys to read each answer hng)
(jk if u wanna u can read)
(ok)

dan howell

1) why did you snapchat phil in the first place?

i was a desperate and lonely teenager who had nothing better to do but to try and find friends so when i found out his username, i thought why not give it a try?

2) do you have a daddy kink? daddy issues??

only for phil.

3) how much do you love phil on a scale from 1-10?

our love cannot be expressed in numbers!!1!1!!

4) who gave you phil's snapchat?

that is a secret

5) are you ever going to ask phil to marry you?

i mean we are technically married, he went to jail for me and i went to therapy for him like do we need marriage to give us a label????

6) are you secretly a female waiting to come out?

what the fuck, no! do i look like a girl?

7) why are you so adorable

dOnT fliRT wiTh mE

8) if you could describe phil in three words, what would they be?

blue, beautiful and sexy

9) on a scale of gay to gay, how gay are you?

i'm the rainbow at the end of the scale

10) what are your biggest turn ons and turn offs?

biggest turn on are love bites??? (bonus points if on the neck)
biggest turn off is farting i guess?? idk this is embarrassing

11) WILL THERE BE A SECOND BOOK, DAD?

i think you spelled dan wrong :/

12) what's your favourite flavour of icecream?

its a tie between ben and jerry's cookie dough and placenta ;)

13) do you like food?

this is the same as asking,

"do you like the idea of evan peters fucking you in the ass?"

and the answer obviously yes

14) do you want a child? if so what would you name them?

i would like to start off with trying to take care of a dog first

if hypothetically phil and i adopted a child, i would name him pablo or bob

15) where do you think you would be right now if you didn't meet phil?

probably in a deep existential crisis

16) when are you gonna propose??

i am kind of a pricey little shit so i think phil will be the one to propose

petty, i knoW DONT BULLY ME OK

17) how many kids do you want?

maybe two? the idea of phil and i carrying a child each in strollers is eVErytHIng

18) make up tips?

just have sex, it brings a natural glow to ur face

19) what was your first thought when you started talking to philly?

you know when a person is avoiding you all the time, you just have this unsatisfactory feeling in your heaRt that you just really want to know the reason? i think that's what happened with phil.

he was so reluctant to talk to me that i made it my life mission to make him my friend

20) would you like to invite brendon urie to your beautiful wedding?

is that even a question

21) flower crown or nah?

heLL yeah i wanna look kawaii as heck

22) DO YOU LIKE CHICKEN??

um, i was vegan for 3 weeks but i missed the meat :(

23) what was your first thought when you started talking to philly?

he was kind of different. like whenever i texted strangers they were generally up for talking and sent pictures easily but phil was different. he did not even want to talk to me?? originally i thought he was a weird guy because he was so stuck up but i was so intrigued by him that i decided to bother him until we became friends.

24) would you have a boy or a girl as your first child?

probably a son, because i really want to treat him right, the way my parents never did me. i want to try and understand how hard it could be to be supportive of your son, that you simply decide to ruin his life and disrespect his choices.

25) what would your life be like without phil?

my life would be incomplete without him, and i know that i seem cliché saying that but really, phil has brought so much more meaning to my life, he has made me a better person and he is probably the only person i will be in love with. i can't even imagine my life with someone other than phil, the idea haunts me.

26) how do you like your tea?

just like phil, steaming hot.

27) what is your favourite part about phil's dick?

that it's all mine?

28) do you prefer pastel blue or rose gold?

pastel blue because rose gold is a bit too mainstream for me

29) will you wear a pastel sweater and a grey beanie?

fUCK YES

30) how do i come out to my parents?

you're asking me?

31) will yOU STOP CRYING?

look who's talking

32) would you ever consider being kinky with phil?

what do you mean consider, i'm always kinky with phil

33) what's you and phil's favourite position in bed? ;)

you mean for sleeping? probably when we're spooning.

34) when is the wedding?

2022

35) how is the cheeky bum sex?

gr9

36) do you mourn after your parents or do you just find it a waste of energy to be sad that they don't accept you?

kind of both. i miss my mother a little because she was always so kind and caring, eventhough she did not support me in my decision of being with phil. my dad, was always the materialistic jerk but he occasionally turned into this soft guy who took his family out for icecream. to sum it up, yes i will miss them but i don't think i regret leaving them behind.

37) what was it like in the chamber of hell?

if by that you mean the therapy, then let me tell you it was hell. at first they were sweet, offering tea and donuts but as soon as i started talking back and refusing to agree with what they said they became violent, pushing me into a bland room and tying my arms because i was thrashing.

they injected me with some type of drug that literally made your sense vanish, and your body feels so lethargic that you can't even function.

you did not have anything to do, except watch straight documentaries and everything wrong with homosexuality. they made you hate homosexuality so much that you begin questioning everything.

i don't know why but i had mentioned phil a couple times there and as soon as they got to know about this they literally threw me into a brain scanner shit and all i remember is that after 72 hours i was sitting in a blue chair and they were back at offering donuts and tea, asking me whether i wanted to go back home.

so yes.

to sum it up, it was the chamber of hell.

38) why did you give phil so many chances?

because i couldn't let him go.

i loved him too much and i was too dependent on him to erase him out of my life. secretly, i thought all this was just a test of fate, whether we decide to stick together or part ways. i wouldn't say that i didn't question our relationship, because i did, but i was so emotionally connected to phil that nothing seemed to break that string between us.

39) how big is phil's dick?

dick bigger than a tower, i ain't talking 'bout eiffel 😏

40) what would you name your child, girl/boy?

boy would probably be bob
and the girl will be pablo

41) is phil your sugar daddy?

keeping in mind all the factual statements i would say yes

42) why r u problematic?

because i can't make toast

43) would you rather bang phil everyday or band evan peters once?

i mean if phil agrees we could have a threesome with evan

(phil r u listening pls bb)

44) top or bottom?

wouldn't mind either but i like being a bottom, at least for phil

45) do you want to paint your nails?

probably? my nails are not very groomed so maybe a bit of black polish will work

46) can i lick ur face?

y

47) why are u so smol?

iM 6'3 FITE ME

48) how was your first cheeky bumsex?

if it was anyone other than phil it would probably hurt much more because i don't think anyone can handle a person so delicately, like phil did me. he was so careful and loving and sweet and i loved it, every part of it. the stretching hurt a bit, obviously, and when he *cough* entered me it hurt a lot too, but phil was very gentle and was trying his best to distract me from the pain so yeah.

it was fabulous.

49) is phil good in bed?

as innocent as he seems, i'm surprised how he acts in bed

oh and to answer ur question, yes. he is s0 fucking good.

50) could you and your wife adopt me pls?

of course sweetheart

51) if you thought you were straight in the beginning why did you tell phil that he's your future husband?

ummmmmmmm

i never said i was straight????? i was questioning my sexuality all the while and that is why i slept with cat

52) how much was that mug?

£12

53) do you like when phil calls you pet names?

yes ^.^

54) will you ever go back to your parents to confront them?

probably when i'm emotionally stable enough to face them, and now that i have phil maybe he'll help me out? i don't know

55) what's your favourite thing about phil?

his smile

56) can i have phil?

excuse me

57) favourite name to call phil?

he loves it when i call him mine

phil

1) why did you wait so long before telling dan that you were to jail?

he already had so much on his plate, i couldn't just tell him that i was sent to jail because of his parents, he would never stop blaming himself.

2) do you have a daddy kink?

only for dan.

3) red velvet or marble cake?

red veLVet

4) are you ever going to ask dan to marry you?

probably

5) if you were so annoyed with dan in the first place, why didn't you block him?

i was a lonely person to be honest, and dan was giving me all the attention i was craving. i had to be slightly reluctant to talk to a stranger and so i did tell him that i didn't want to talk to him a few times, before i just gave in and i'm happy that i did because who knew we would end up together right now!

6) thoughts on dan secretly being a girl?

i wouldn't care to be honest, i love him too much to care about the gender

7) who would you think would be a better top?

me!!1!1!1!1!

8) biggest turn ons and turn offs?

biggest turn on- dan howell
biggest turn off- someone who's not dan howell

9) when did you first realise that you loved dan?

it was after our seventh skype call, where he had fallen asleep on his desk while he was writing something, and as creepy as it sounds i had spent the whole night watching him sleep, trying to figure why he makes me feel happy, sorted and warm and i came to the conclusion that maybe i was in love with him.

10) are you going to leave dan again?

never

11) how much do you love dan?

enough to offer him the last slice of pizza

12) now that you've given dan the promise ring, do you plan on living with him forever? (aka marriage)

i do, but i'm not sure if dan would like the idea so it's the best for both of us to be properly settled before we discuss about marriage.

13) do you want to be a daddy?

i mean i already am but sure why not

14) where do you think you would be right now if you didn't meet dan?

probably on my old couch with a cup of coffee, stressing about work or something. i just know i wouldn't be happy.

15) what would happen if dan's parents busted the wedding?

i thought dan and i were getting married near a volacano or like in a forest or something so i don't know how his parents will come here but if they do i will have lots of security guards to take care of them.

16) do you want to have kids? what would you want to name them?

i've always liked the names olive and april for some reason for a girl? idk and for a boy maybe, adrian or something?

17) how big is the d?

if by that you mean dan, he's 6'3

18) how do you like your tea?

warm, like dan

19) are you taking dan to japan for your honeymoon?

oh my god that's a great idea he will love it

20) how are ur houseplants doing?

😳😨😥

21) u gay

..thanks?

22) what would name a kitten if you adopted it?

probably ginger

23) what your favourite type of gluten free, dairy free, sugar free, vegan, glucose free, non fat, multigrain cereal?

did you mean: death

24) what's your favourite thing about dan?

his smile

25) light up my life

i'm not harry styles

26) are you gonna stop hurting dan and finally be happy with him?

..yeah, okay, don't be rude😒

27) do you like ripped jeans?

eh, they're okay, just not for me

28) opinion on ceiling fans?

sexy

29) are you ever going to stop eating dan's cereal?

:3

30) would you consider buying a doggo or a pupper?

puppeR

31) do you know what YouTube is?

obViously????

32) how do you feel about that mug?

i mean it's kind of thick and nice to drink out of so..i don't really mind it that much

33) have you ever talked about dan's parents to your mom?

not really, i don't think dan would be comfortable with that

34) do you love dan?

not at all!!1!!1!!11

35) do you really love dan or is it a show so your parents don't bug you about getting a wife?

wHAT THE HELL OF COURSE NOT, I LOVE DAN

36) why haven't you told dan everything?

i have..?

37) be good to dan or else i'll stuff your mouth with cheese

how threatening can you people get

38) do you want to paint your nails?

i mean i don't want to but i wouldn't mind

39) how do you imagine your future to be like?

probably along the lines of happiness?

40) why cherry lube?

because its traditional

41) can you and dan have cheeky butt secks again?

😳

42) how is dan's bum?

its soft and cute and i love it

43) why were you such a dick in this story?

:(

44) PROPOSE TO DAN

iM PLANNING TO BUT NOT THAT SOON

dickhead howell (aka dan's father)

1) why don't you support your son?

because i don't want him to be someone who does not fit in, in society. what kind of a father would i be if i raised my son to be a fag?

2) go die in a hole for me, please?

you wish sweaty

3) why are you homophobic?

i'm not homophobic, i just don't like the idea of my only child to be gay

4) have you ever considered drinking bleach?

surprisingly, i have

5) do you even love your own gay son?

of course i do, i am his father, but i cannot accept the idea of him seeing another guy, or being in bed with another man. it disgusts me.

6) do you hate puppies too?

they have weird wet noses, i don't like them and they are annoying.

7) do you miss your child?

yes i miss coming back home from work and finding no one who whines about the green vegetables in their food, or pout when i flick the channel from anime to news. i miss having dan in the house because maybe he was the only connection between me and my wife.

8) what the hell happened to the therapist?

nothing, we paid him even though he failed at his one job

9) do you regret sending dan to the therapist?

only because it caused me a good fortune

10) have you ever thought about a reality check and stop acting like its 18th century and oppressing not only your wife but your son as well?

it's not like dan is not sucking dick right now and it's not like dan's mother has stopped blaming me for dan running away, so maybe you can just shut your stupid fucking mouth?

11) how did you convince the police that dan was sixteen?

showed him some fake birth certificates that he didn't bother to cross check, it was easy

12) all the homo bro?

what kind of language is that

13) did you leak heathens?

what's that

14) teach me how to doggie

what the fuck where are your parents

15) are you proud?

at least i tried, so yeah i am

petty howell (aka dan's mother)

1) why can't you just accept your son?

i have always accepted dan

2) is your husband abusing you?

this isn't the honesty hour, so no, i am in a healthy marital relationship

3) why did you side with dan's father and not dan?

i could not. i am too intimidated by my husband to stand up for my son and so i had no other option. besides, i never 'sided' with dan's father, i just could not defend dan.

4) you were the person who was supposed to love dan, your own son, the most in the world and you should be ashamed of yourself. but then again, i'm glad you revealed your true colours and dan isn't suffering anymore.

revealed my true colours? i did not even lay a finger on dan! what do you think? i did not hear the rumble of the car outside my house for five days at 3 am whenever dan's friend or boyfriend left? do you not think i knew about him sneaking out of his bedroom window ever night? how oblivious do you think i am?

either way, i am happy too. i am happy that he's happy and hopefully one day he can forgive me, or at least give me one last chance to make things right.

5) why did you marry such a dick?

he was a nice man once

6) when did you become such a hoe?

excuse me

7) why were you not brave enough?

i don't know

8) you're a faking betraying mother who deserves to burn in hell

ha ha, guess you're right

9) do you approve of dan?

yes, definitely

10) what's your opinion on same sex marriages?

i don't know much about them, i just think that you should be able to marry whoever you feel for

11) how would you feel about dan marrying phil?

is phil the pale boy who helped dan earlier? oh, he looks pretty, i would not mind. i just hope he takes good care of my baby.

12) leave your husband

i can't possibly do that

13) what do you think of your husband's horrible action?

i think just that, that they are horrible and doing all this just makes him a poor excuse of a father.

14) does it feel good?

if your parents stab your pet in front of you, would it feel good sweetheart??? because that's exactly how i feel if not worse

15) i thought you were nice

i thought so too

mama lester

1) do you ship dan and phil

what's ship

2) can you leave so they can have butt sex?

oh dear what are you on about?

3) how is phil such a smol cinnamon bun?

you are what you eat :)

4) can you convince phil to marry dan?

maybe i should! they will look so cute together

5) how do you feel about your son dating dan?

daniel makes my son happy and that's all i want

6) opinion on dan?

he is a lovely boy and is sweet and handsome and phil seems to be very fond with him, so i like him

7) do you like milk

yes milk is nice

8) when did you know they were a thingy?

phil has never bothered to text any of his friends back when he was with family, he wouldn't even talk about anyone else, and i was surprised when he brought daniel over and texted him every five minutes even though they were going to meet again in a few hours. it warmed my heart, the way phil would talk about dan, the way he would look at him, i knew they both had something going on.

and of course when i looked at them sleeping in bed together, not an inch of gap between their bodies, i knew they were a thing. friends don't sleep like that.

9) why are you so amazing and supportive?

isn't that how all mothers should be?

10) are you 100% for phan?

what's phan?

11) what's up sk8ter girl?

excuse me

12) would you help dan if he was in a complicated situation?

of course! he has grown so close to our family in the past week, we treat him like our son, so if he was ever in trouble, we would definitely help him.

13) how would you imagine ur son's wedding?

probably lots of sweets and lots of chocolate fondues, i would like to think he'll get married to dan and i'm sure phil would be a paranoid mess on his wedding day.

14) what do you like the most about dan?

that he makes my son smile

15) can you adopt me?

sure

16) is martyn your favourite child?

*no comment*

papa lester

1) are you okay with homo?

well my son shows signs of homosexuality so of course i'm okay with it

2) phil is pregnant

what?!

3) could you do a dad joke?

is there a specific category called 'dad joke' i'm not aware of

4) thoughts on dan?

cool lad, real sweet

5) your son is dating dan

what? is he really? i mean katherine had suspected that, but i didn't know it was true.

6) do you approve of dan?

yeah? i mean what's wrong with him, he looks pretty handsome to me

7) ur child is a god

like father, like son ;)

8) have you ever climbed an oak tree?

i would probably lose a leg if i try that

9) did you know a tomato has 7 calories

my life was just fine without knowing this piece of information

10) swaq boii

what does that mean

11) how did you react when phil first dyed his hair black?

i think he looked slightly more manly with darker hair and would attract ladies but i was obviously wrong as he wears pastel shirts and has a boyfriend i mean

12) does dan seem nice?

yes

13) do you like dad jokes?

wHAT ARE DAD JOKES

14) how's life

swag

15) how do you like your christmas present?

i think it's funny but i like it. he also bought me a mug i suppose, but he drinks out of it himself??? he's not a daddy???

16) would you like to have grandchildren?

well now that phil seems to be interested in boys, i will have an adopted grandchild, but i look forward to it! hopefully the child wouldn't be a brat

17) favourite son?

whoever sits and watches two hours of golf with me

phil's car

1) does phan have hot kinky sex in you a lot?

who's phan

2) what it's like to be ridden by dan and phil?

phil is a good driver! dan on the other hand taps his fingers a lot😠 but he's cute so i don't mind☺️

3) may i ride u

ask philip

4) do you like dan?

yes, he seems sweet

5) do you like it fast?

yeah💦💦👅👅
i like phil's foot pressing harder on that gas pedal mhmmm

6) does phil treat you right?

he is a very careful driver but sometimes he gets mad at me and grips my steering too tight, but i like it so,,,,

7) do dan and phil frickle frackle a lot inside you?

i only saw a bit of dan's bum once they got too carried away but phil had realised that they were in a public parking lot so they stopped :(

8) does dan eat inside of you?

i mean they do eat take out in me so

9) what it's like to have wheels?

it feels amazing

10) do you like it when dan enters you?

uhm..yeah, kind of😳

11) did somebody steal your car radio?

fortunately no

12) how big is the back seat baby?

excuse me i don't give stats like that
(my kik is @philsbabycar text me for nudes)

13) what colour are you?

black

14) do you like iphones or samsungs?

iphones

15) favourite moment of dan and phil that has happened inside you?

probably the time when they ran away, because both of them were so horny i could feel it

16) did you feel the tension too?

yes😥

17) what air freshener do you have?

lavender👅😉

18) what songs are played the most?

probably mcr or muse and sometimes that band,,,, twenty two airplanes?

19) how much gas can you hold?

as much as you want me too

20) how's dan and phil's ass?

soft yet firm, and so amazing

21) how much junk you got in that trunk?

don't flirt with me, dirty talk makes my engine rumble💨

22) you are my favourite character

why thank you my precious

23) are you a good car?

yes daddy

24) marry me

only if ur a ferrari

me

1) i think i love you?

i think i love you too

2) can u plz make a sequel!

evEN AFTER 190 CHAPTERS??
(turns out yes)

3) how to say your name?

uh-nun-yaa

4) can you be my friend?

yes

5) any tips for new authors?

i've answered this before but oh well

1) check if your story idea is original- and by that i mean do a bit of research to make sure there aren't any popular books with the same title/cover/plot as you

2) to get noticed faster, add appropriate tags so that your story pops up when people search for a particular thing

3) write whenever you feel like writing, and always jot down plot ideas in a notebook or something incase you forget them

4) don't be disheartened if a few people don't like your style of writing

5) there's always scope of improvement, so if people critique your writing (positively) don't cuss them out, just learn from the helpful comments you get

6) listen to songs that inspire you to write or that relate to your plot

7) expand your vocabulary! do not use the same words again and again as it will make your writing seem bland and boring

8) do not copy, like at all. try being as original as possible

9) while some people will tell you to completely get rid of clichés i would say that do not completely abandon them. i mean do not go out of your way to make things different or else your book will just seem like a pile of bs

10) ask authors to promote your book, but do not spam them! it may come off as annoying and the author may snap at you

11) keep your descriptions short and crisp, leaving something to imagination but not revealing too much.

12) a catchy title, a decent cover, and you're good to go!

hope this helped :/ sorry i'm not the best at advice

6) will you marry me?

will you take me to a rainforest for a wild life safari and buy me lots of icecream?

7) where did the idea for this story come?

as said before, i saw a few edits of dan and phil on tumblr, depicting how they would be if they snapchatted each other and when i saw that there is no such book about them i just couldn't keep myself from writing this.

8) will u be my mom?

of course

9) how are you so pretty?

wHat the hell i'm nOt

10) how do you write such amazing content?

i just write whenever i feel like i need to get something out, so basically writing is an outlet for me to get out all the emotions. i think that reflects in my writing?? i don't know i think i'm pretty crap at it

11) did you intend on ruining so many lives with this fic

NOT AT ALL I DIDN'T THINK I WOULD EVEN GET NOTICED

12) how does it feel that you've crushed your reader's hearts?

kinda good tbh
( just because i know i'm giving you a happy ending so,,)

13) could you talk to my family and make them as supportive as you?

of course honey! *prepares axe just in case and pushed glasses up the nose*

14) hi dad (?) how does it feel to have so many readers?

pretty swag if you ask me but obviously as so many of you read what i write (idk why) i am always insecure about my content, crossing my fingers everytime i publish a chapter

15) daddy

baby

16) can we collab?

i would love to

17) thoughts on this fic ending soon

..i'm gonna go and masturbate then cry into a slice of pizza

18) HOW DO YOU WRITE SUCH GOOD SMUT?

i-i don't watch porn, i-i don't read smut or anything and i-its not like i own a nfsw tumblr haha ha

19) do you listen to lana del ray?

weLL OBVIOUSLY

20) instagram?

i'm pretty inactive on there but it's @riickyblitz

21) who's your favourite 5sos member?

probably calum?????? or ashton they're so cute i wanna fUcwhajm

22) do another younow!

i might do a successful one, i will let you guys know!

23) when will you update hook ups again??

welp here's the thing, i have a few drafts but the updates will be really slow. if you guys don't mind slow updates i'll start publishing chapters of that too?

24) THANK U FIR READING MY STORY

NO PROBLEM FAM

25) feminine!dan or pastel!dan

personally, pastel!dan

26) would you ever eat a lemon?

im gonna zeSt it

27) on a scale of 1-14 how approachable do you think you are

I AM VERY APPROACHABLE PROBS A SOLID 13.5

28) do you like avocados?

yE

29) do you get annoyed when someone spams you?

luekhamminggs  i think it's safe to say i don't

30) are you going to sleep with a smile today?

i don't think so

31) do you have a daddy kink?

kind of a lot

32) would you consider making reading lists?

eH IDK

33) favourite phanfic on wattpad?

i love bad boys don't smile and blurryface by @phanci fucj

and then of course are my favourites, kittens and steamrollers and the hat fic

34) what is your favourite colour?

well black obviously because i'm emo as fuck but other than that i'm strangely attracted to pastel colours???

35) will you break my heart?

FUCK THIS REMINDS ME OF A FANFIC BY DANI MOON

36) bless your soul

thank

37) did you plan everything or make it up as you went?

definitely made it up as i went

38) tips on staying motivated?

okay since i have been dealing with writer's block with a few fics, *cough* radio and hook ups *cough*, i have come to a conclusion that you tend to write more about the book you're more attached to i guess? the one that you like reading on your own and the one that you write with ease.

i think staying motivated depends on how connected you are to the idea. i used to write snapchat everyday because i was so connected to it and i guess that's what gave me motivation.

other than that, music and reading other books helps a lot.

39) how does it feel knowing that you have inspired so many people to write?

i-i didn't know t-that i have

40) how do you deal with writer's block?

okay so i am not very patient when it comes to writer's block. i usually talk it out with a friend (ultrcn ) or my brother and it helps me to clear out my mind a bit.

then i proceed to drink 20 cups of tea and write atleast 15 drafts unless and until i'm happy with what i get and trust me, yes it's hard and yes it's frustrating but the best way to get over a block is to write even more.

just write until you get to the point where you're satisfied with the chapter and before you know you'll be over it.

41) hey girl let's sex

well if you say so

42) did you ever think about quitting writing or discontinuing this book while writing it?

ahem, hahahaha no!!1!1! not at all ultrcn 😳

43) CAN YOU NOTICE ME SENPAI

*notices and waves handing you a packet of chips bc ur cool*

44) do you ever believe you're some people's favourite author?

nOt at all i doubt myself so much i barely even think people like my writing

45) do you stalk my snapchat?

probably

46) can we be best friends? or friends at all?

yeS PLS (although,,,,, as many of you may have noticed i suck balls at replying so)

47) can we have a sleep over and watch phan together?

can i call it a date

48) when is your birthday?

in 5 days actually! those of you who suck at math, i got you, it's 11th august

send me giFts

49) where do you live?

new delhi, india

50) ur so pretty pls bless us with another picture

look at me being tumblr aS hecky dizzle

--
THE END
HOLY FUCK THAT TOOK ME SO LONG ITS LIKE 6000 WORDS FFS

also don't murder me bc i didn't answer
1) louise
2) girl that slept with dan
3) hotel room and snapchat accounts

BC WTF SO MANY J CAN'T IM SORRY