K O A   P T. 1

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SONG
AFRAID - THE NEIGHBORHOOD

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AUGUST 11, 1998

I slowly set Cam down in Cece's lap where Noa sat still. They had driven here tonight and if they don't fall asleep on the couch they'll drive home, by the looks of it Cece is going to take them home later tonight since Connie is already gone.

"Goodnight Cam." I mumble, walking over to the bedroom, but I see Royce on his stomach, his arm over Koa's and her hand....

Her hand was running through his hair just like I used to do.

"Oh.." I mumble and Royce opens his eyes and looks at me, his head on her chest.

His purple eyes were shining, his eyelids covering half of them as he was.. he was so relaxed.. and it hurt so bad. "I'm sorry Kelca but can you sleep on the couch tonight? I'm just so tired..." Royce mumbles, and Koa slowly looks over at me and gives me a smirk.

Koa looks at me like she finally won..

I mean we were friends of course but I knew she wanted Royce, that was her main goal. And she got him... it was so easy...

I take a deep breath, heavy in my lungs and oh so hard to take. Unbelievably hard.

"Yeah I just think that I have the expertise to help Royce right now.." she mumbles, laughing lightly.

Her fingers scratched his head lightly, holding onto his Lucious blonde hair.

I sniff a little.

That image almost created a photo in my mind that went with all the other photos I've taken to capture my big memories.

And this memory?

Royce doesn't care about me....

He was lying and I was wrong..

Maybe dad was right...

—

1984

I walk up to my dad, his skin was soft and he was happy, only 20 years old which was surprising for having a five year old daughter. It's ok though... I think he's a great dad.

He always taught me about people, especially when I had to leave my best friend Sophie, he told me not to trust anybody until I know they will stay.

And I was always gonna leave, so no making friends for me.

—

N O W

Maybe I should have been under the rule that Royce was under...

Maybe paid attention to that rule my dad gave me..

Probably would have helped me resist from Royce's charm.

All Royce did was make my heartbreak and my dad hate me...

I should've known in my life nobody asked perfect as Royce was would like me...

"Hey Cam...." I mumble as I come back, "wanna sleep next to me for right now?"

And while I lay silent with Cam, Noa at my feet, tears stream down my face.

He wasn't the one...

—

AUGUST 12, 1998 (THE NEXT DAY)

I woke up to a sound of a snap, and shake myself awake. Cece was gone, she told me before I fell asleep that she was going home and I could bring them back whenever.

I hold Cam close, opening my eyes and looking at Royce, who was muttering cuss words under his breath.

"What did you just do?" I mumble, annoyed.

He scratches the back of his neck,

"Nothing..."

I groan.

"Since I had to sleep in my clothes last night.. I guess I'm gonna go take these guys home." I say passive aggressively, getting up and holding a sleeping Cam and Noa, my arms struggling slightly but they were okay.

"Look Kel, Koa is finally gone for a few hours-"

"No." I mutter, "don't call me Kel when you called me Kelca in front of her last night, Jewwly."

"No Kelca- you don't understand-"

"No no no I do understand... Bev and Tay told me, I know. But you didn't care you were hurting me, you only saw yourself and your need for Koa to be by your side-"

"You knew-"

"I found out yesterday and they made a few good points, you should've maybe.. hmm.. told me? Or wow! Y'know a great one? Be comfortable with me leaving for a month because you know I'd be coming back? Or maybe here's another crazy one, come with?"

"Kelca- i- I didn't know you'd want me with you-"

"Because I wouldn't anymore, I would've... but instead.. a day after I told you about my insecurities and you choosing Koa over me... you chose Koa."

"No, Kel-"

"I'm going to Cece's and dropping off Cam and Noa, I'll be back later tonight."

"No- Kelca if you aren't back in an hour I'll go and find you."

"You don't own me."

"Please Kel, before you leave just know that I know I had problems in my reasoning but whenever I think of you leaving I think of you with another guy... you're so pretty and amazing and perfect that I'm scared if you leave for a month you'll fall for a guy like how I fell for you.."

I swallow, still holding the kids with their mouths hung open, drooling on my back.

I turn to him....

Normally I would say that I had to see him with Koa.. but he... he said he fell for me. He admitted for the first time that he had some type of feelings toward me.

"I'll be back in an hour."

And the entire walk there and back was just me thinking...

Thinking of maybe this being the last time we had this problem... thinking.. maybe he could come with me and my mom?

Thinking and reminding myself of why I love him.

And it's to the point that when I walk in that door again and see him mixing ingredients in a bowl with his little apron, I walk towards him and wrap my arms around him.

It's carrot cake... with a notepad in his dad's hand writing right next to it.

And I just start bawling.

—

ROYCE's POV

(Sorry abt a lot of cuts and time jumps and shit)

I set my whisk down, smiling as I finally finish the cream cheese frosting, the cake is in the oven cooking.

I messed up bad...

And I'll fix it.

I'll make her carrot cake and maybe...

Maybe I'll admit how I feel to her.. tell her that i.. I love her.

I'll hold her in the spot we used to sit on the couch, and I already cleaned it so it doesn't smell like Koa's gross floral perfume.

I'll lay with her between my legs and put a blunt up to her lips. Her soft.. soft lips.

And I'll just relish in the moment where I finally smell lemonade and purple skies instead of Floral.

The door creaks open as she walks in, closing it lightly. And she slowly walks up to me, and wraps her arms around me.

"I'm almost done with a carrot cake-" I start but she, she starts shaking in my arms, and you can vaguely hear whimpering as she cries.

"Sweetheart what's wrong?" I ask, my heart pounding and my fave dropping.

"I missed you caring.." she mumbles lightly as I start feeling tears through my apron and shirt.

Oh god...

I didn't mean to hurt her this bad..

"My dad always used to tell me not to trust people I knew until they proved that they would stay and last night I just sat there crying wishing I listened to my dad because all you did was make me hurt while you relished in woman loving you- I just don't know what to do.."

"I never meant for any of this to happen." I mumble and she cries, "I just wanted you to love me! I tried everything... I just wanted you to care about me how you do with Koa."

Everybody was out of the house for three more hours, so I grab onto Kelca and bring her over to the couch, holding her in my arms.

"Well I'll tell you some of the times I wanted to stop it all and talk to you but I knew that I couldn't because I can't just be friends with you without wanting to kiss you every three seconds... one of the big ones was when I was first starting and you looked so sad, wondering and trying to get my attention. I had to replace you with Koa a lot...-"

"You let her sit in our spot.." Kelca cries lightly and I laugh, "I cleaned it.. don't worry."

I swallow, trying to make her happier while I hold her head to my chest and run my fingers through her hair.

"Oh don't get me started about yesterday night when you came in the room.. I wanted you in there so badly, so so badly. For the last few nights you had slept on your side on the very edge of the bed, as far away from me as possible if you hadn't slept with the girls in one of their rooms. It killed me because before I had always slept with you either on top of me or under me and I held onto you as tightly as I could. It broke me when you left that room... oh and when I woke up I took a Polaroid of you sleeping with Cam and Noa because you finally looked like you didn't hate me.."

She unwraps her arms from around me and sits up, straddling me and grabbing onto my face. "No matter what you did I could never bring myself to hate you.."

"You promise?" I ask and she nods.

For the first time in two weeks she leans in and kisses my lips. And god...

My head and heart pounded, my stomach twisted in anxiety, my blood I could hear pumping through me and fuck I don't know how but that moment right then was when I truly knew she was the one.

And also she made my dick throb from a kiss but Y'know..

I knew she was the one.

Because despite the times I've hurt her she's stuck with me, kissed me, loved me

I failed her and ruined this for us so much.. and she's still here.

I pick her up, grabbing into her ass as her arms and legs wrap around me. I practically throw her against the wall, not actually hurting her. I pin her against the wall, my hands holding her hands back and kissing across her cheek and under her jawline to her under ear, sucking and leaving hickies and love bites all over her neck.

She moans, arching her back into me and I chuckle, "finally I can hear your pretty fuckin moans princess.." I mumble.

But god that made my dick harder than it's ever been, and I'm normally not this easy to please, but god... she was my weakness. Everything she did practically made me hard.

She whimpers, "that was kinda hot, Jewwly."

"that's the point.." I growl into her ear, laughing lightly as she takes a deep breath in.

But a smirk develops on her face as she looks towards me and whispers in my ear, "I'm ready.."

"Oh fuck you.." I mumble, my dick throbbing like back up a little and look between us. She was wearing a pleated skirt and a black graphic crew neck, her beach waved hair falling over her shoulders and her brown eyes beautiful.

I could look directly at her underwear since her skirt had rolled up, and something about pink with red lace made me snap.

I push her against the wall and hold her up with my body as I take her crewneck off of her and rip my shirt off too. I grab into her thighs and carry her into my bedroom. Closing the door with my foot and throwing her onto the bed.

She looks at me lustfully and I smile, running my tongue along my top set of teeth.

"You're so fuckin hot..." she mumbles and I look her directly in the eyes. I slowly move over her before my face is right above hers, and mumble

"I'm yours... forever."

She lets out a sigh, her hands pressed to my abs. I grab onto her throat and smirk, "Flip over and stick out your ass for me, baby." And she smirks.

"What if I didn't?"

"Then I'd do it myself." I mumble.

"I dare you to-" she starts, but I flip her over and push her back down and her ass up, standing over her and wiggling her out of her pleated skirt.

I smirk as I see her in only her underwear, leaning down and kissing her ass. Her legs were practically shaking as the light from the window made me able to see all of her. But I just kiss her pussy through her underwear and chuckle at her whimpering reaction. My lips were left wet and her panties were showing why.

I undo the back of her bra and take it off, flipping her over again so I can see her. Her boobs were perfect despite their small size.

I wiggle off her underwear and groan.

"Fuck... you're so fuckin hot. You're gonna make me cum by looking at you Jesus Christ..." I say and she laughs a little, "take em off, Jewwly."

I smirk. Undoing the shoelace around my cargo pants and throwing them down.

I pull down my boxers, my dick finally able to stand straight up.

I smile, and her eyes looking yearningly at my cock. I laugh a little, but she jumps off of the bed, standing  up and pressing her body against mine, looking up at me and slowly kneeling down to her knees.

"Kelca what are you doing?" I ask and she raises an eyebrow, "Nothing, Jewwly..." she promises cutely, but kisses the tip of my dick.

"Kelca I swear-"

"I wanna, Royce."

"And I want you to too but I'm supposed to make you feel good tonight Kel-"

"Shut the fuck up" she mumbles, taking the tip in her mouth.

My eyes roll back and I twitch a little, "Fuck.. I uh- watch how you... fuck!" I scream, losing attention to what I'm saying as she goes all the way down.

I moan, looking down at her to see her looking up at me as she bobs up and down. I get a hold of my words and grab onto her hair. "Watch how you fuckin speak to me, Slut." I mumble.

"No." She mumbles. I groan grabbing The back of her head and fuckin her face how I would her pussy. Pounding in and out of her while she gagged.

I let go of her head and pull her up onto the bed.

Trauma changes a man to want to fuck his girl like he means it what can I say.

I throw her onto the bed and hover over her. "I'm gonna be nice to you because it's your first time but don't forget that every sound you make will make me a little more impatient."

She nods, whimpering as I lay over her.

My arms are on either side of her head, cradling her head with my hands. She wraps her legs around me as I roll on a condom, "You sure you wanna do this?" I mumble and she swallows..

"Do you promise you won't leave me again?" She asks lightly and my eyebrows furrow. "I'm sorry you even have to ask that question, but I know now that I can wait a month without you as long as I can get you for forever."

"Then do it..." she mumbles.

I lay my head down on hers, kissing her lightly and kissing all throughout her cheeks and jaw, and slowly push myself into her.

Of course it hurts and I know that, but she was aroused enough so that it would hurt less, her juices covering the tip of my dick.

I wait there, not wanting to open my eyes and see the expression on her face, but as I go farther in slowly my eyes open and roll back, my stomach twitching.

I look down at her, out of breath, but she looks blank faced, her eyes closed and her breathing smooth.

"Kel?" I ask lightly, "You okay?"

"I'm fine... just hurts a little." She mumbles.

"fuck.." I groan, "I really wish there was another way to make it stop hurting."

"It's ok, Royce.. really." She mumbles, her eyes finally opening and looking into mine.

"No start moving and kiss me."

"Fuck you you do what is say." I growl, beginning to move, my right palm goes and grabs into her boob while my left hand goes under me to rub her clit slowly, going faster as I move faster.

Her head shoots back and I take the opportunity to kiss her neck, going down and leaving hickies on her boobs and stomach.

Her hips buck up into me and I smile, holding my face just above hers so she can moan into me. "Faster Royce!" She screams and I growl from pleasure, "Fuck.."

"You're so fuckin tight oh my god-"

I do as told, feeling better than this has ever felt. I didn't... I didn't know it could feel this good..

God I loved her so much.. and she looked so beautiful.. so beautiful.

I feel her clench around me, her nails digging into my back and leaving marks. I rub her clit faster and faster as she cums, "You like that huh? Are you my pretty fuckin slut?" I ask and she nods heavily, out of breath and her mouth hanging open.

I smile against her mouth, kissing her lightly and move back, standing up straight as I pound into her and watch her squirm.

Her body was perfect... so perfect..

And I groan as I feel the build up coming, her clenched around me while she came, I moan as I bend over. "Fuck me like you mean it, Princess." I mumble and she smirks.

She pushes me over and climbs on top of me on the bed.

She puts me inside of her again, and it takes her a second to adjust before she runs her fingers through my hair and starts grinding and jumping on my dick.

"Fuck.... faster, Princess... oh my god... fuck!" I moan and continue to moan as she touches me in all the right places. Her hands pressed to my abs that twitch from pleasure as they run up my body and clench onto my hair.

I grab onto her neck and choke her with my right hand while my left is on her waist, guiding her up and down on me.

"Fuck I'm gonna cum.." I mumble, groaning and pulling her head in to kiss me as she moves faster.

She hopped off of me and immediately started sucking my dick. "Oh my god Kel.... please.. fuck...!"

She kept going as I groan, grabbing onto her hair as I cum in her mouth. She was so perfect...

She slowly crawled up my body, sitting on top of my dick and slowly grinding on it, kissing over my cheeks and running her fingers through her hair.

"I love you Royce.." She mumbles, but she stiffens and takes a heavy breath. "I mean in the friend way of course..."

"Are you sure about that?" I ask cockily, but I can't hold back the smile on my face... she loves me?

Her breathing is heavy in my ear as I hold into her as tight as possible.

"Shut up-" she says, her cheeks going red. She attempts to get off of me, embarrassed, but I pull her back in.

Looking back on it I should have said I love you too... that was my chance.. but I was too scared.

"I won't let go of you again.."I mumble and she smiles, kissing my neck. "Is it because I'm hot as fuck?"

I nod, "oh fuck yeah that's reason number one."

She laughs a little, falling to my side and kissing my chest.

"I'm gonna take a shower.."

The next thing I hear is a knock on my door and the shower starting. I stick my head under the water and put a towel around my lower half and Kelca jumps in.

"What?" I ask when I open the door, "I just got out of the shower and Kel is taking one now."

And it's Koa, back. She completely disregards my sentence and puts her hands on my chest. "Well looks likes you're ready for me..."

"No I was ready to go make food for Kelca while she showers." I groan.

She looks up at me with squinted eyes, "You didn't act like this yesterday..."

I laugh, "Yeah because yesterday I didn't have the love of my life with me and now I do, leave Koa."

"I sleep in here asshole."

"No Kelca sleeps in here, you get the couch-"

"That's not what you said when you wanted to fuck me last night-"

"Quiet down." I growl. It was a lie, I didn't only want her in there to fuck her. But Kel was the only reason I had stopped fucking girls left and right, she made me feel whole without them. And when I didn't have her I felt this need to fuck Koa and make myself feel whole, of course I didn't... I love Kel too much.

"No! You can't use me, Royce, now tell me why you suddenly change your mind!? We were gonna be together again."

"Because you're not her and I will always love her... I'm sorry. You keep almost ruining this for me and I just give into it and I'm not gonna again..."

"Uh huh.." Koa says, rolling her eyes and walking away.

I close the door and walk into the bathroom, dropping the towel.

"Hey baby.."