A G I R L S T A Y I N G O V E R ?

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S O N G -

CANNIBAL QUEEN - MINIATURE TIGERS

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R O Y C E ' S P O V

(I know crazy...)

"Well I'm Camden Beck." I hear Camden say confidently to the woman next to me, his arms crossed In front of him. He quickly looks back and gives me a look wondering if he messed up his own name. He did well pretending to be confident. Just like me....

Well, I guess I've always been good at hiding things. I would hide things I loved, hoping that a god-if there even was any- wouldn't see it and take it away from me.

I stopped crying over my mom dying at five because my dad was crying to much, so I hid that as well...

I guess Kel is the only person in years that I've opened up too without thinking about them being taken away.

Which is stupid, terribly stupid, because I'll get attached. But I think it's just the idea of knowing she'll leave, it's just the idea of knowing.

That's all I want, is to be told they want me and they will stay.

I shake my head and his small round eyes lights up, clearly proud of himself. He looks over at Kelca and smiles to her too. Her face lights up, excited to have a toddler in her presence, her brown hair slightly curly from air drying it after salt water swimming the other day.

I don't think she's ever talked let alone been with a small man like Camden.

Camden turns back to me, obviously excited as he stands up a little taller in my arms and whispers lightly, ever so lightly in my ear.

"She's so pwetty, Woywoy..." he mumbles and I nod, smirking at the ground and trying my hardest to fight back a blush trying to crawl it's way onto my face.

I felt like my smile was from ear to ear, knowing I've caught a beautiful best friend, but also the repercussions of it were that every guy I knew loved her. Guys at the party that I talked to talked about how hot the 'new tourist' I walked in with was.

Little did they know she was gonna stay, and that she was mine...

Not that I owned her or anything, but in the fact that I've settled myself into her life, that her parents love me and we... we like each other a lot. I feel like it was meant to be that I met her.

I see the bright blue house in the distance, and slowly look up at Kelca, looking over at the house in the same way I did when I first saw it.

Camden was right...

"I know she is.." I mumble, my head resting on his small shoulder as I stare at her.

Her eyes were a beautiful brown and her hair was just like it, a dark brown that waved down to her collarbones. She had a perfect button nose, and rosy cheeks constantly.

It was hard to not stare at her all the time I was with her....

"Is that it?" She asks, and Camden quickly turns to her as she turns to us. I hum, only paying attention to her beauty.

She smiles, grabbing Cam's small body and holding him in her arms, walking faster down to the pretty house where Cece and Noa are sitting in their yard playing with grass. Cece was Noa's foster mom for right now, and Connie was Cam's foster mom for now.

Noa was a little girl with light brown hair, a little darker than Cam's and honestly... they loved each other. They are currently planning their wedding. It's adorable.

Until Noa has to leave....

Noa's grandparents are currently fighting for custody over her, and Cam is going to be heartbroken when she leaves.... especially since Connie is planning on asking me to adopt Cam once he turns 7.

It breaks my heart.... Noa looks up and squints her eyes at Kelca and Cam, before tugging on Cece's shirt.

Cece looks up and smiles at Cam, looking behind Kel and seeing me walking with my hands in my pockets.

I give her a small wave.

She was my second foster home...

She was really sweet of course, but also she liked little kids more because she loved giving them Th at experience they needed without all the 'tween/teen angst'.

She gets up and Kel sets Cam down. He quickly runs over and jumps onto Noa. She giggles, hugging him tightly and kissing his cheek.

Cece furrows her eyebrows at Kel and she blushes red, turning to me nervously. "Don't bring another girl around Cam and Noa if they're not gonna show up again, Royce!" She scolds, referencing a time when I was 18 that I came here to visit Noa with a tourist on my side. I am still ashamed that high me did that, but it did make me cut back on smoking.

I was always high back then...

Her angry voice was laced with a rather heavy southern accent and Her skin was a glowing dark
shade, with black hair, she looked like Tayana if she were older and more mature.

"No I'm not-" I argue, but sigh, knowing how bad my temper gets and has gotten, "Ugh.. shes my friend, Cece!"

"Really?! Royce that's amazing!" She says with a smile, but turns to Kel, her eyes dark. Kel slowly moves over, attaching herself to my arm.

Her fingers were long and skinny, her nails digging lightly into my bicep. She was nervous around Cece, which was expected when Cece was protective over all of her foster kids, especially when the house after her's that Tay, Bev, Flynn, and I went to was abusive.

"You usin this boy?" She asks with furrowed eyebrows, her finger pointed outward and poking Kelca's chest.

Kel swallows, "I promise, Ma'am. I've never had a friend before either.."

My face softens, my jaw no longer clenched with the idea of Cece's scaring her away, because I feel terrible.

I know what it's like, constantly moving and never having friends. But she didn't have that wonder of when she would leave, she knew she was supposed to be alone.

All of her life, just knowing that she always had to be the lonely weird kid.

I also had a childhood like that, where I wasn't confident or happy, I was alone. I was alone because I was scared, scared I would leave or they would leave, like I could never get attached.

But I have Kel, who I can easily not get attached to because I know she's going to leave...

But She's here now.

for now....

All that I can do is have my anxiety kick in, knowing I'm getting attached, but I push it to the back of my mind.

I want to savor my time with her, not be scared. Just like death, don't be scared of it, live while you can.

Kel continues to unconsciously dig her nails into my arm, only causing a little pinch in my arm. As I knew though she wasn't purposefully hurting me so I let her continue.

"Okay okay! Well welcome to our family dear, just don't fuck it up."

She whispers the last part so the children don't hear her cussing. They're young and will repeat everything.

Cece walks towards the kids, "I know y'all have to go see Tay, Bev and Gerald, but if you wanted to stay for dinner or eat it in the way I can give you some? We have paper plates."

"Sure!" I say enthusiastically, looking down at Kel who's stare is on me. She blushes, looking down at her hand which is close to mine, almost touching me. But her hand only grazes against mine.

I make the move, pushing my hand into hers and intertwining our fingers, using my other hand to lift up her jaw.

"Don't be scared, Kel, I grew up with these people. They'll love you I promise.."

She swallows, biting her lip and nodding, "Y'know this was easier in theory."

I laugh a little, nodding and walking up our lawn to the door to get our food while Cece watches the kids.

"Everything is, but you've already committed." I say, raising an eyebrow at her

"No I could just leave-" she says, pointing her thumb back out the door. I laugh a little, picking her up and spinning her so her legs wrapped around my torso, "No you don't!" I laugh, and she giggles, squirming in my arms as we pass the staircase.

The floors and staircase were made out of old cracking wood, that creaked every time you stepped on it, the walls were a light blue with stripes, the wallpaper peeling, but everything else was perfect.

On the island in the kitchen is a pizza box, a few pieces of pizza cut up into small pieces for the kids, and a store-bought container of potato salad.

"I bet you wanna stay now don't you, Kel?" I ask with a raised eyebrow and she jumps out of my arms, "You tempt me with food and then act like you're original Jewwly."

I laugh a little, loving the way she said my last name. I've never told anybody my last name before,
Partially because they could find it out in yearbooks but mostly because it was my real parent's last name.

That's the only way I'm lucky that I never got adopted out of the foster care system, sure nobody wanted me, but I got to keep my dad's last name.

It's kinda weird to say but... I don't really feel sad when I think about my parents anymore. It was a long time ago...

I grab two paper plates, handing her one, earning a polite smile from her. I grab us a couple pieces each, and plop potato salad on mine and hers before we walk out.

"Kel!!!" Camden yells a little, beckoning her over. She smiles, turning to me and waving me over too before running over to them.

"I'll be right over!" I say, walking over to Cece with my hands in my pockets, watching Kelca play lightly with Cam and Noa.

I stand next to Cece, leaning against the deck as she smokes a cigarette. I haven't smoked a cigarette since I was sixteen... and now I feel like I really never need one again.

It might be because of Kel...

"Do you like her..?" Cece mumbles, blowing her smoke forward, though the wind pushes it toward me.

"No Cece, I don't like her." I huff with a laugh, staring at Kel.

She was really just so pretty....

Cam was right when he said that....

"Oh hun you're given her the wrong message then!" She huffs, slapping my arm to scold me lightly.

"No I'm not Cece! We're just friends! She said it herself...."

She squints her eyes at me as I take a spoonful of potato salad and put it in my mouth.

"Oh son, you don't even know how girls work anymore do ya? Most do the time if a women gets treated with any level of respect from a man, especially an attractive one, she falls for him."

"Just because I'm respectful?" I ask with a laugh, but Cece looks at me with dead eyes, flicking off the tip of her cigarette.

"It's a messed up work we live in, Y'know how Seb treats women? That's basically a lot of them. The bar is LOW." She says and I sigh...

I lied to Kel when I told her about Seb...

I was friends with Seb when I was sixteen, when I was in a bad place... mentally.

He introduced me to cigarettes and alcohol, he's the one who made me go to juvie for underaged drinking, he's the one who made me disappoint my mourning sisters.

He comes around sometimes and tries to get me to fall back into his trap, his trap of disrespecting and using women. I don't disrespect them, I used to use them of course, you know that, but recently...

I have no need.

I wasn't on that quest to get girls undressed anymore...

"I'm gonna go hang out with them..." I mumble and she nods, "I'll be sitting over here, son."

She was getting quite old recently, so she sits on her chair and watches us from afar.

While I walk over I think about it... I think about how Cece said I could be leading on Kel. I mean, she was beautiful, and I never would doubt that she is meant for me... but... she's leaving. If she's leaving she can't possibly be my soulmate! Even if I think she's pretty and amazing... even if I think she's funny... even if I think she's adorable when she gets all defensive and nervous... even if when her body touches mine it makes me the perfect temperature, and when she touches me I tense up and twitch, my stomach sensitive to her touch.......

even if I think she's sweet and caring, especially towards the children I'm constantly around. I can just tell that she's caring while I watch her play with these kids.

fuck.

𖣔

The sun is low, and Cam, Noa, and almost Kelca have fallen asleep in my arms. I shift a little, sadly waking up the half-asleep Kelca that rested effortlessly beautifully on my shoulder.

She shakes her head a little, standing up and letting me finally set Cam and Noa down in her bed, their bodies curling up to each other. I tuck them into their blankets and turn to smile at Kelca.

"He's gonna fuck her when he's older I bet it." I mumble and Kelca slaps my shoulder. "Jewwly!" She scolds, but much heart pounds.

Her hand was resting on my chest, and she had called me Jewwly.... "what?" I laugh nervously as we walk out of the room.

She shakes her head and bites her lip before looking outside, the black almost taking over the sky.

"Can I let you in on a little secret?" She asks and I raise an eyebrow, leaning against the wall of the upstairs hallway. She closes the door behind her, not having the guts to look up at me.

"I'm kinda scared of walking on side streets in the dark, because there is no light, and I'm kind of afraid of the dark if I've never been somewhere before. The first time I tried to sleep at my store I couldn't for like three hours-" she drags on, ranting endlessly because of her nerves.

I put my hand over her mouth, pushing her against the wall with my hand holding hers.

"Shut. The. Fuck. Up." I mumble in a whisper with a small laugh, my breath fanning over her blushing face. I think she was unaware of how much she blushed.

"Well we could go to Bev and Tayana, I can sleep on the couch and you can sleep in my old room, or... we could just go to my apartment and stop by Tay and Bev's in the morning, I'll just have to give them a call."

I remove my hand from her mouth and she smiles at me, "Either is okay..." she says.

"Okay.." I mumble, trailing my eyes over here face that was mere inches from mine. "Well go to their house and then we can sleep over there?? Then I'll take you home in the morning?"

She purses her lips, lifting her hand and running her fingers through my freshly washed hair.

It felt amazing feeling her fingers graze up my scalp, lightly pulling on my hair while she pushes it back. I knew she loved it too.... you could see it in her red tinted face.

"But I really wanna see your apartment!" She whines and I laugh a little, lifting her chin up by cupping her jaw with my right hand, my leg pushed in between her thighs.

"Well, how about I take you to my apartment in the morning, we can stay there for the night. All we have to do is ask your parents. And your parents love me." I say.

A smile lifts on her face. "Is it because Bev really wants to see me?" She asked, slowly walking down the stairs and waving me on to come with her.

Her hips swayed naturally while she walked, and the pants she wore gave her justice....

I swallowed, nodding lightly, but she turned to me and raised an eyebrow. My eyes practically darted from her ass to her eyes, afraid of being caught. But I play it off.

"You've got some ass on you Kellinoals." I joke with a smirk, slapping her ass lightly and walking a little faster so I was in front of her.

"So do you." She jokes and I laugh, trailing my tongue along my upper set of teeth.

I wave to Cece as we walk out of the house, "Goodbye!" She screams.

I turn around so my body is facing hers, walking backwards across the street.

"And yes, Bev told me she loved you. Tay said you were mediocre at best but- it's fine" I say and she laughs, "Tay has an attitude on her huh?"

I nod, "She definitely does, kind of like you."

She laughs sarcastically, making me laugh whole heartedly. Her laugh was so cute, it was like a giggle but she really meant it. I wish she laughed more...

It's probably because you're not funny Royce....

Quickly enough we make it to the house, Kelca practically leaning on my arm she was so tired. She was so cute...

STOP ROYCE! don't get attached...

You already are.

"Hi pops!" I scream as soon as I enter the house. Bev groans as she walks down the stairs, wearing a pink sports bra and grey shorts.

"Can't you just leave?!" She asks, before noticing Kelca and smiling, rushing over.

"Oh my gosh you're so pretty!" Bev says, and just like me she's the most touchy person ever, so she grabs Kelca's face and rubs her hand over it.

You'll understand why we are like this when you meet our dad, because he practically raised Bev and Tay.

"Maybe put some clothes on Bev!" I say, my eyebrows furrowed. "Bet you wouldn't mind if Kelca wore these clothes huh?!" She accuses and Kel's eyes grow wide.

I feel heat coming up to my face, but I play it off.. I hope. "Yeah cause I'm a grown ass adult and I'm not related to her."

I point to Kelca and Bev sticks her tongue out at me.

"You just wanna kiss and get hickeys and stuff huh? I'm only a year younger then her, dude. Don't judge me!"

I growl, opening my mouth to speak but Pops interrupts with a booming voice.

"Stop fighting Y'all!" Pops says, walking down the hallway. He had tanned skin and medium length grey hair. He was well kept, with a little bit of stubble, and he still worked out everyday.

He throws the towel he was wiping his hands on into the laundry basket, staring at me and Bev scoldingly. "Tay is asleep and she already had an attitude today so she's gonna be-"

"WHO THE FUCK WOKE ME UP YOU ASSHOLES!" Tay screams from upstairs and Bev laughs a little while pop's brow's furrow together.

"Don't curse Tayana!"

I laugh a little, "Yeah dont fuckin curse Tay!" I yell back, and Pops' eyes squint at me.

When he opens his eyes they settle on Kel, pulling me and her over with light gentle hands. He kinda gave off the same vibes as Bob Ross...

"Hello young lady! How are you?" He said, his voice soft and calm as he reached his hand out for hers, shaking it firmly. Meanwhile, Tay stomps down the stairs and starts yelling at Bev in the background of our conversation. She says things along the words of, 'I hate you all' 'I had a terrible day and this is my life?!' 'Chad broke up with me!'

I turn to Tay, leaving Kel to talk softly with my all-so calm father.

"Chad broke up with you I'll fucking best his little ass-"

"Don't hurt him!" She sobs, covering her eyes with her hands. "Okay okay! I won't hurt him! But don't cry over a man who fuckin sucked. He walked around in his crust dirty old socks like he owned the place. He didn't own the place! He's a 5'3" 14 year old!"

Bev laughs a little, "You wouldn't even have to hurt him! You could just put your hand on his head and extend your arm and the hands he threw at you wouldn't even make it!"

Me and Bev burst out laughing as Tay cries, and Pop's finally turns his attention towards us.

"We have company y'all!" He says, softly scolding us. As though I could forget her..

Tay looks Kelca up and down, huffing and rolling her eyes disgustedly. Kel's face falls, her eyes dropping to her shoes.

I watch Kel sadly and swallow, turning to Tay and furrowing my eyebrows. "Calm down you dirty old hag," I huff brotherly, and she gasps, "I just got broken up with!"

"Doesn't give your the right to be a bitch to the sweetest girl I've ever met!" I say, my hand signaling to Kel, she swallows and my dad huffs, his fingers going up to message his temples.

"Tay, don't have an attitude right now, I'm just tryin out muffin recipes, and Royce, stop yellin at your sister!"

I raise an eyebrow, "I'm like a year away from being her legal guardian, that gives me the rights to yell at her."

"And I can't wait for that, but right now, let me talk to the nice young lady about my muffins! Go do drugs or somethin!" He says, turning to Kel again.
She laughs a little, turning to me and signaling for me to come over to her side, her dark brown hair beautifully wavy.

I step behind her and wrap my hands around her waist, my head leaning on her shoulder.

"So I recently tried to make blueberry muffins, but I found using a cobbler recipe just made all of it better!" He says, his hands moving aggressively while he talks.

"Oh my gosh really?! I've never thought about that before!"

"I know! It was weird for me to try but I just love baking so much, and what more can go wrong than me just having muffin shaped cobbler!" He says with a laugh, she laughs too.

There's that laugh again...

my angel's laugh...

Her hand goes back and runs lightly threw my hair as she continues to talk to pops, but I zone them both out, focusing on the feeling over her hands running threw my hair.

I can't help but imagine things I shouldn't, her tugging on my hair and moaning, her body rolling against mine, her perfect face red and flustered by my touch.

My eyes close, my head digging into her neck and my hips going backward so they're not against her back.

I smell her scent... her scent of a glass of sweet, sweet lemonade that's garnished with a magenta rose.

She was like the embodiment of the beaches here. Her hair curly from salt water, her skin always smelling of salt. She always wore swimsuits. And she... she was the thing people would come to look at from miles away.

But one thing I know, is that I don't need to come from miles and miles away... cause I was lucky enough to have her in my arms now.

But she's leaving soon...

And you do know one more thing, and it's that you won't let yourself get any more attached because you're scared. There is no when and where with her... I just know she can't stay. There is no possibilities.

She's seventeen....

So...

Maybe that's the reason I didn't fall for the girl of my dreams right then....

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PLEASE ANSWER THE QUESTIONS I ASK HERE!! Please please please and thank you <3

Oh wow I was proud of that ending oh my-
It leaves suspense right? Because that's what I'm going for :)

If you were wondering, I'm not sure what the ending will be yet. Whether I want them to get together or not. So.... good ending or bad ending y'all?

This was a really long chapter so the next one will probably be short I'm sorry!! But still like 2000~ words.

Oh also, sorry for saying so much, but... I know this was kind of a confusing chapter for a story about supposed unrequited love, but I know where I'm going. Trust me it will all make sense when Koa comes or if you don't get it then then at the end.

Also, I just started writing the chapters where Koa comes in and- ugh

Let me know what you thought!