the sound of you. it offends me.

ABOMINATION. i command you to be silent.

________________________

THOMAS E. SNIEGOSKI

EVELYN WINDSOR WOULD MAKE A GREAT MOTHER, she could just feel it in her gut. the idea of raising her own little ones, little mini hers running around, molding them into exactly what she wants them to be. it's the perfect happy ending, the perfect plan, the most perfect and brilliant idea she's ever had

of course, she doesn't want to get pregnant and give birth a million times, that would be excruciating and it would mess up her damn near perfect physique. but if reginald hargreeves could adopt and raise effectively, what's to stop her?

sunny's one and a half when she takes her, and she doubts the sweet little sobbing blonde she finds locked in the bathroom closet that late night even remembers her birth parents. and she very much doubts her violent outbursts and tantrums have anything to do with that night

lila's her pride and joy though, her perfect girl, the daughter she'd worked so hard to find, her golden heir, her greatest creation. evelyn has nothing against sunny and the others of course, but there's something about lila that's just special, she's different from the others, she's extraordinary, they're just expendable

she knows it might be just a little bit unethical, spending hours looking through statistics, searching for all the almost perfect candidates she can find, forging a couple reports and tagging along to missions she normally wouldn't, scooping up the scared, crying child when their parents are left dead in the living room. but evelyn windsor wants to run the whole of the commission one day, and how can she do that if she doesn't have her own little perfect team? her own little umbrella academy?

the only thing that sets her 'academy' apart from dear old reggie's is that she succeeds where he failed. her children stay with her, they don't leave the moment they turn eighteen, they don't change their names and never look back, they don't evade and her ignore her or their siblings until one of them dies and tragic but boring and mundane death, her children stay tethered to her, tugged close by ends of their rather short leashes

evelyn windsor knows how to keep her children under control, knows how to keep them restrained, obedient, grateful, and under surveillance

evelyn windsor is the perfect mother, ask any of her children and they'll tell you nothing less. they'll tell you how she raised them to be strong, to know no fear, to look death in the eye and wink. how she taught them how to throw ninja stars and slit people's throats when they were still adolescents. how she tells them all everyday how proud she is, how much she loves them, how grateful she is that they'll always stick by her, how they'll never veer of the path, how they'll always stay loyal

evelyn windsor created her own little army of killing machines who no world outside of their mother's control and words. her own little army

of children who want nothing more than to be cradled and held and loved for and cared about, children who would kill themselves and everyone around them for the chance that their mother might spare them a glance, might acknowledge their existence for once in a millennium, might finally just love them as they are

"BEAUTIFUL ISN'T SHE?" evelyn's hand raked through sunny's blonde locks. they're messy and uneven, she had another one of her fits again, grabbed a pair of scissors and chopped up her hair until she was left with nothing but a messy bob that looked like it was cut by a blind person

sunny tilted her head up, finally pulling her gaze away from the infant in her arms. brown eyes wide and starstruck and mouth hanging open just slightly "is she really my sister?"

evelyn chuckled softly, pulling her hand away far enough to pat sunny on the cheek "of course she is silly girl. you've always wanted a baby sister, haven't you?"

sunny nodded weakly, mouth still hanging open, eyes still wide, like she can't believe the little girl in her arms in real. her nods were slow, careful, like she was afraid if she moved too quickly she'd break the baby, like it'd jostle her so much she'd explode

evelyn chuckled softly, pinching sunny's cheek before finally pulling her hand away "of course you did, gets pretty lonely back home doesn't it?"

"yes mama" sunny mumbled, it sounded almost robotic, but it was music to evelyn's ears. she patted the top of her daughter's head, watching out of the corner of her eyes as sunny's full attention went back to the infant in her arms

"well what are you going to name her?" the handler didn't have to look at the little girl next to her to perfectly picture the little expression that comes with the soft gasp that falls from sunny's lips

"i get to name her?" evelyn couldn't hold back the quiet chuckle at the disbelief in her daughter's voice, the way it's nothing but an excited squeak, the way she can practically picture the way sunny's eyes lit up and went wide as she gazed at the little girl clutched protectively against her chest

"of course you do, she's your sister after all" her attention was barely on sunny anymore, instead it was more focused on the restrained, sobbing woman on the ground, the muffled pleas and sobs from behind the gag, the coppery smell from blood coming from rubbing her wrists raw against the restraints. she knelt down next to her, running her hand along the woman's forehead, which only seemed to draw more desperate sobs from her mouth

"it's okay" she whispered, shaking her head, continuing to trace her fingers across the skin, across the dried blood along her temple "it's okay, she's gonna be okay"

the woman screamed, it's a disgusting sound, it made evelyn cringe, nose scrunching up, eyes squeezing shut. she heard the soft screech that falls from the infants mouth when the sound hits her ears. she heard the soft whines and coos that fall from sunny's lips as she tried to calm the baby. it's enough to make evelyn wanna rip her hair out, and she bites back an angry growl at the sound of the woman's screams and sobs

"JUST -" the handler barley managed to catch the yell in her throat, and she doubted she would have been able to if she hadn't caught sunny's wide eyed, scared glance from corner of her eyes. her teeth clenched tightly together and she forced her mouth to form a pathetic grimace of a smile, eyes finally interlocking with the woman in front of her's. "just listen to me, she's going to be just fine. you have nothing to worry about"

slowly, evelyn pulled herself back to her feet, fiddling with her belt, with the gun rested against her left hip, eyes still locked on the shaking, wailing woman below her. she looked like an animal, like a deer someone would toss into the back of a big, blue truck before mounting it up on their wall

"ssh, ssh, it's okay sissy, you're okay" the white haired woman couldn't hold back the small, genuine smile that spreads across her face at the sounds of sunny's soft coos. it's enough to make her turn her head, glancing back at the little blonde girl and the now sleeping baby in her arms

"good girl, she likes you" she said softly, and the sight of sunny's excited grin is almost enough to make evelyn forget about the frantic, bawling woman on carpeted floor below her

"really?"

"oh of course, she wouldn't have stopped crying if she didn't" evelyn resisted the urge to kick the damn animal in the face at the sound of her muffled screams and pleas when she tugs her gun out of its pocket against her hip "have you picked a name yet?"

sunny's lips pursed into a thin line, choppy bangs falling into her eyes as her gaze flicks back and forth between her sister and her mother. "jolene" the name falls from her lips simply, naturally, she doesn't have to think about it long, it seems natural, like it was meant to be, like it had always been her name "like that song you played for me!"

the handler chuckled, and sound that's almost lost in the click of the gun's safety being flicked off. "good choice darling, i'm sure she'll love it"

"you think so?" sunny's voice held this shining hope, a glimmer of excitement and joy, that evelyn sure she'd heard before. but any deeper questioning of that quickly vanished the moment the gun was lifted and aimed

"i know so darling girl" the words were an almost pathetic whisper. a whisper just barley uttered out before the trigger was pulled and the bullet went straight into the spot between the woman's eyes with a sickening, and all too familiar and comforting, thud. "trust me." 

florence pugh ✷ SUNNY WINDSOR

twenty seven.  i am the monster you created.  mama's little problem child.  lesbain.  open love interest.  i once begged someone to love me the way i loved them and that's the saddest thing i've ever done.  my own death does not frighten me, but yours? oh that is my greatest, deepest fear.

rachel zegler ✷ JOLENE  ' JJ '  WINDSOR

nineteen.  all my troubles on a burning pile.  mama's favourite little arsonist.  pansexual.  open love interest.  to be a star you must burn.  pretty brown eyes and a mind full of thoughts.  but fake happiness is still the worst sadness.

ritu arya ✷ LILA WINDSOR

twenty nine.  i used to think i was smart but you made me look so naive.  mama's perfect girl.  bisexual.  possible open love interest.  just because i'm outnumbered doesn't mean i can't kill all of you.  i'd bleed for anything if it held me the right way. 

kate walsh ✷ EVELYN  ' THE HANDLER '  WINDSOR

age unknown.  two headed mother in your bed, you know she hates you.  ' mama '.  not a love interest.  the thing about a mother's hate is that it's not that different from a mother's love.  i etch my face upon my wicked flesh, i am my own devastating god. 

SMELLS LIKE TEEN SPIRIT

an umbrella academy applyfic

1. RESPECT KINDESS.

please be respectful! unwanted hate of any kind is not tolerated on my page! you're allowed to hate / dislike a character, but please leave their creators out of it! homophobic, racist, and any type of hateful behaviour is not tolerated on this fic or on my account. dni if you support isreal

2. STEALING.

i recently dealt with a creator who blatantly stole my story and gifs from one of my fics, the last thing i want is for that to happen here. i work very hard on my characters and stories and i will actually go batshit up the wall insane if i'm stolen from again, don't copy me or anyone else! being creative is more fun trust me!

3. GHOST READER.

if you apply and get in, please don't be a ghost reader who never votes on any chapters or never comments or anything, please feel free to spam the comments! it makes my day when people feed me their thoughts along the way as they read, it makes me giggle! ghost readers ( unless absence has a legitimate excuse ) will have their characters booted from the fic the first password is your favourite scooby doo iteration ( movie, show, etc )

4. DIVERSITY.

one of biggest things when it comes to applyfics is interesting characters! the more original and cleverly well crafted your character is, the better chance they have at getting in! basic straight white girls who have little to no original personality traits have not as much of a chance at joining the cast as more interesting characters do. also please don't make everyone's straight and white and female!! GIMME SOME CHOICES

5. APPLICATION.

you are allowed to apply two - three times, vips however can apply as many times as they want! at least one application from non vips has to be male

6. WRITING SCHEDULE.

please be patient with me! chapters will come out when the come out, I have a life outside of wattpad! password two is your favourite scary movie. please don't spam me asking for the date of the next update! you'll probably be ignored / blocked

7. HAVE FUN.

iwant you to have fun with this fic, the windsor sisters and their shenanigans have been rotting my brain and im so excited for this fic to take over my thoughts, and i want you to have fun with it too! this fic is for giggles! it's supposed to be fun!

8. FACECLAIMS.

please make sure there are lots of good quality gifs of your faceclaim of choice! choosing actors who are really obscure who have no gifs / content at all makes my life super hard! please don't use any influencers, animated / video game characters, or anyone problematic! i'm fine with overused faceclaims as long as not all of your backups / main choices are ones that get used in every fic known to man

9. VIPS

there are several people who are vips in this fic, this are my friends and mutuals here on wp who will receive priority when it comes to this fic! for example, vips get first dibs on faceclaims and love interests, and their characters have a higher chance of being accepted. this isn't supposed to be mean to exclusive, these are just my friends and i'm giving them a bit of priority over, for exmaple, people i might not know as well. please don't be discouraged by this if you aren't a vip, your applications won't be any less considered for this fic!

10. PASSWORD.

there are two different password in these rules, your form will need that, at least three tags, a permanent follow, and to shoutout this book on your message board with me being tagged to get accepted

11. HARGREEVES VS WINDSOR

for this fic, i won't just be accepting only windsor children, i'd also be interested in seeing hargreeves children or outside characters that join forces with them along the way. however, vips will have more priorities when it comes to non windsor characters

12. OPINIONS

while the handler is a horrible person and an even worse mother, it's rather boring to write that every single one of her kids hates and resents her. not all of your characters have to love her, but it's a lot more fun an interesting their opinions on her vary. i want to see at least one character in the whole cast who's super loyal to the handler, it only adds to the angst and it's more fun for me  to write!

FORM

due date : JANUARY SIXTH  ( could be subject to change )

note : please include comment of your character's name, a couple emojis that describe them and / or a title associated with them, and then have your form in the replies

LEGAL NAME. ( pretty self explanatory )

PREFERRED NAME. ( self explanatory )

NICKNAMES. ( what they're called, who calls them that, and how the feel about it )

SPECIES. ( human, possibly genetically enhanced, pretty self explanatory )

GENDER. ( self explanatory )

PRONOUNS. ( self explanatory )

SEXUALITY. ( self explanatory )

AGE. ( ranging from 16 / 17 - late thirties for windsors, don't have all your applications be teens tho, i want some older siblings too!! )

AGE WHEN THEY WERE TAKEN IN. ( for windsors specifically, range for infant to about five or six )

BIRTHDATE. ( self explanatory )

AFFILIATIONS. ( what / who are they associated with

OCCUPATIONS. ( current and former )

ACCENT. ( do they have an accent? if so, what is it? )

FACECLAIM. ( make sure there's lots of gifs / content )

BACKUP. ( self explanatory )

SECOND BACKUP. ( just to be safe!! )

HEIGHT. ( self explanatory )

HAIR COLOUR. ( self explanatory )

EYE COLOUR. ( self explanatory )

HAIR TYPE. ( curly, straight, wavy, etc )

HAIR LENGTH. ( self explanatory )

PARENTAL RESEMBLANCE. ( who do they most look like, mom or dad? )

ANIMAL RESEMBLANCE. ( is there a specific animal they look / act like? like a kicked puppy or a baby deer or a bear? )

POSITIVE TRAITS. ( their best traits )

NEGATIVE TRAITS. ( their worst traits )

OUTFITS. ( what do they like to wear, what the windsor child might wear off duty )

PIERCINGS. ( ears, belly button, etc )

SPECIAL JEWELRY. ( do they have a necklace / bracelet that they're attached to? )

TATTOOS. ( where, what, and any special meaning )

SCARS. (where, and what from? )

POWERS. ( do they have any special abilities? for hargreeves almost exclusively )

SIGNATURE KILL. ( for windsor's exclusively, what is their signature way to kill, arson is taken )

PERSONALITY. ( as much detail as you want! the more the better! i wanna write your characters the way you imagine them )

SOCIAL CATEGORY. ( introvert, extrovert, ambivert )

HABITS. ( little things they do, pretty self explanatory )

SMOKING HABITS. ( not required for spirits, as it has no effect on them, though it might add a little something )

DRINKING HABITS. ( not required for spirits, as it has no effect on them, though it might add a little something )

TALENTS. ( things they're particularly good at )

PHYSICAL CONDITIONS. ( physical aliments, ex: nerve damage, asthma, please explain where from, include diagnosed or undiagnosed )

MENTAL CONDITIONS. ( ex: ptsd, anxiety, autism, please explain where from / how it effects them, please include diagnosed or undiagnosed )

MENTAL HEALTH. ( out of 100 )

PHYSICAL HEALTH. ( out of 100 )

FEARS. ( what scares them the most )

LIKES. ( things they enjoy )

DISLIKES. ( things they hate )

ALLERGIES. ( self explanatory )

HYGIENE. ( how clean / dirty are they )

DESCRIBED AS. ( words / phrases people use to describe them )

FATHER. ( name, status, if windsor, include their birth parent )

MOTHER. ( name, status, if windsor, include their birth parent )

SIBLINGS. ( names, status )

RELATIVES. ( names, relationships, status )

FAMILIAR RELATIONSHIPS. ( what is their relationship with each of their immediate family members like? )

BEST FRIENDS. ( self explanatory )

FRIENDS. ( self explanatory )

FRENEMIES. ( self explanatory )

ENEMIES. ( self explanatory )

NOTABLE RELATIONSHIPS. ( which relationships from above are most important to your character? can be from enemies or friends! please explain their relationship, why it is that way, and how it affects your character )

OPINION ON SUNNY. ( what is their relationship like? how does your character feel about them? )

OPINION ON JOLENE. ( what is their relationship like? how does your character feel about them? )

OPINION ON LILA. ( what is their relationship like? how does your character feel about them? )

OPINION ON EVELYN / THE HANDLER. ( what is their relationship like? how does your character feel about them? )

BACKSTORY.  ( be as detailed as you want! the more i can know about your character and their life, the better! )

NOTABLE MOMENTS. ( key moments your character has throughout the series you'd like to see in the fic )

WOULD YOU BE OKAY WITH YOUR OC DYING. ( yes or no, not all characters can live! however, it is most likely they will be revived in season four, so no need to worry! also if you have a specific idea for how they might die, that would be helpful too )

FORMER RELATIONSHIPS. ( have the dated anyone before? what was that relationship like? )

LOVE INTEREST. ( either put an existing character or leave as 'open', please keep in mind this could be subject to change once the cast is out )

LOVE LANGUAGE. ( your characters top three love languages )

TROUPES. ( tropes you'd like to see between your character and their love interest! )

HEADCANNONS. ( little tidbits about them! )

MORAL ALIGNMENT. ( chaotic / neutral / lawful + good / evil / neutral )

HOGWARTS HOUSE. ( self explanatory )

SONG THAT DESCRIBES THEM. ( self explanatory )

QUOTES THAT DESCRIBE THEM. ( self explanatory )

BOOKS OR MOVIES. ( which do they like better? )

FAVOURITE FOOD. ( self explanatory )

FAVOURITE COLOUR. ( self explanatory )

FAVOURITE MOVIE. ( self explanatory )

FAVOURITE DRINK. ( self explanatory )

FAVOURITE SEASON. ( self explanatory )

FAVOURITE ARTIST. ( self explanatory )

FAVOURITE SONG. ( self explanatory )

CAT OR DOG. ( which would they choose )

DAY OR NIGHT. ( which are they most like, personality wise? )

PASSWORDS. ( check rules )

TAGS. ( three plus )

PINTEREST. ( your pinterest, so i can add you to this fics board in the future )

HARLEEN'S HANDY DANDY HELP GUIDE!!

 ideas to help you get started on your form ( if you're stuck )

FACECLAIMS I'D MAYBE LIKE TO SEE : parker posey, emily vancamp, sophie thatcher ( specifically in heretic ), delainey hayles, darce montgomery ( specifically as billy hargrove ), brie larson ( specifically as envy adams ), jasmin savoy brown, kit young, isabela merced, renee rapp, sofia bryant, archie renaux, olivia cooke, matthew gray gubler, lola glaudini, ella purnell, idk literally anybody

SPECIFIC CHARACTER IDEAS : surviving twin ( evelyn killed their twin / separated the two of them ), cowboy ( I REALLY WANT ONE OF THEM TO BE SOUTHERN IDK 😭😭 ), windsor who betrays evelyn mid season, windsor kid who's bio parent is an existing character, would be detective who gets involved in something much bigger than they anticipated, windsor kid who managed to escape years ago and has been hiding out since then

applications

questions

is the anything so undoing

as a DAUGHTER?

________________________

SILCO, ARCANE

author's note

"name nine characters who wouldn't have missed" and it's just all of the windsor siblings. all jokes aside i'm so hyped for this fic and the twisted family dynamics that are coming with it. if you know anything about me you know that twisted sister and mother / daughter dynamics are like heroin to me!! i cannot live without that shit and it's really gonna show with this fic!! sunny and jj are joined at the hip and they must not be separated!!

this fic goes from season two - four, but four will be MAJORLY rewritten because that shit was awful!! and i refuse to put everyone through that again. a group pinterest board / chat will be made so if you have any specific rewrite ideas i would love to hear them there!!

thank you to everyone for taking interest in this fic! it's lowkey been rotting my brain for a hot minute, and the idea of getting to share this with other people has me giggling and kicking my feet! please spam in the comments! please lemme know how love this fic it makes me wanna write so much more!

sidenote

the fanon name for the handler was originated by my friend lottie! full credit for that goes to her!

dedications 

thank you for taking interest!

unnecessarilyedgy mantiswitch

vips

 dcgdays  fireplaceashes-  mbobhftay

final note

if you know me, you probably know i already have an abundance of umbrella academy ocs who notably aren't present in this fic ( shout out to drea hargreeves' three fans! love you all!! ) while it will probably remain this way as they are all heavily tied to eachother in ways they are not to sunny and jj, there is the possibility that they may join the main cast later on if specific characters are left open as love interests! do not fret daisy thatcher stans, we still have a chance!

have fun reading!!