Waliyah's P.O.V.

Sighing heavily as Amma helped me put on my necklace, I pulled my hair to the side, and let them drop as she stepped back, "Doesn't this look a bit much?" I ask her, as the large pink gems stare back at me through the mirror.

Amma shook her head no, "Bohot khoobsurat lag rahi ho." (You look beautiful) She tried to comfort me, "Ayra wants all of us to dress our best, you know how she is."  I nodd, "Is Samar coming?" She asked me.

"I do not know Amma," I say quickly spraying my hair with some hair spray, "Nor do I care."

"Wafa," Amma began,

"Amma." I say firmly, "Please, I am trying my best to move on right now and I do not need you getting impressed by him doing the bare minimum. Samar only did it because he felt guilty not because he cares for me, I know how he thinks, so whatever happened last night, was to make himself feel better." She backed off as disappointment washed over her, "Amma I gave him four years of my life, how many more do you want me to give him?"

"No," She shook her head, "Sorry, I won't get in the way Wafa. You are right, I was just getting excited over bare minimum efforts."

"Right," I inhale sharply, "Chale phir?" (Shall we go?) Amma and I were the last ones to get ready as the rest of the family had already left. Haider's home is a walking distance from ours, so we decided to walk there. "Amma where are the keys?" I ask as I struggle to put the lock on the gates, Amma goes through her bag quickly and hands me them. Clicking the lock in place, I hand her the keys back and begin walking over to his house. 

"Acha haina?" (It's nice right?) I say to her, "Ayra is just a walking distance away from you."

Amma smiled, "It is nice, at least one of my daughters I can see every day."

'Amma, you know whenever you call me, I will come running right." I comfort her,

Amma held onto my hand tightly, "I know, I just sometimes wish that you hadn't. gotten married the way you did Wafa. It was all so quick, and under pressure. Samar and you were going through such a hard time, and then Amal made that request of you two being wedded, everything was just so chaotic."

"There is no point in talking about it now Amma,"  I sigh, "Whatever happened, happened."

"Have you made up your mind yet?" She asked,

I shook my head, "No," I didnt want to spook her before Ayra's wedding... of course, I have made up my mind, I think I made it up the day I asked for permission to come to stay here at home. . .I do not want to go back there, where I am seen as some unwanted responsibility. . .as some... Wish that was gone wrong. . .I do not want to go back to Samar.

. . .

"Okay," Haider's Amma said, "Since everyone is here, I think we should begin the ceremony."

Haider and Ayra smiled at each other, as he scooched closer to her, but Wicky Bhai cheekily pushed them apart, "Not so fast," He said smiling shoving Ayra to the corner of the sofa, to which looked up at him irritated, "You two can get cozy after your nikkah."

Haider smiled cheekily and asked for the ring to put on her finger. "One minute," Ayra said, "Api," She waved me over, confused I walked over to her. "Bhai?" Samar and Ayra were always very close before everything went down between him and I. I knew that she wanted him to be here, but there was nothing that I could do. I shake my head, no. Ayra's smile fell alittle but nevertheless handed her hand to Haider, who sensed her disappointment. Standing beside her, I looked down at my hands, where my own ring was shining back at me. What was the point of me even wearing it, when I had to go around to places as if I was single? Clenching my jaw, I slowly begin to pull it off my finger, as the cheers got louder in the room as Haider placed it on Ayra's finger. Holding the ring tightly in my hand, afraid it will fall, I smile half-heartedly and call for them as well.

Ayra reached over to Malli and pulled off Haider's ring, with the biggest smile on her face, "Ready future husband?"

Haider chuckled, "Ready Future wifey," Ayra slid the ring on his finger, and once again the room filled with cheers, as I felt pain from digging the ring deeper into the palm of my hand. Congratulating them, I step down from the stage, and quickly shove the ring inside of the small purse I was carrying. Amma looked over at me concerned but I shook my head, as if it was nothing. . .

"Sorry, I am late!" A voice said stumbling through the gates, of Haider's home. My body froze, as all heads turned to face him. "Sorry, did I miss it?"

Ayra's face lit up, "Samar Bhai!"

My hands began to shake as he came to stand beside me, "Hello," He whispered to me, I looked up at him confused, "I only came because I didn't want Mariam bullying you here, dont look so hopeful." Samar smiled at Ayra waving at her.

"She is not here," I whispered back, "But if you wanted to come, you could have come earlier."

"Everyone left without me, what was I supposed to do?" He said slightly out of breath, "I won't be late for the next functions."

Inhaling sharply I nudge him forward, "Go congratulate them,"

Samar nodded and went to the stage by himself hugging both of them. Usually, I would feel happy that he had arrived, late but at least he was here. Now all I felt was anxiousness and fear of what he might do to hurt me next. Samar turned back around and came to stand beside me, "Smile," He said softly, but I didn't listen to his command instead I walked off excusing myself to the bathroom. Locking myself in there I try to calm myself down with some cold water as I splashed it on my face. This fear is what he has imbedded in me, and in good action towards me was not going to take this fear away.

. . .

"Ayra and Haider," Khala said, "Come, have a first dance as an engaged couple."

Sitting beside Samar, I sat up straighter at the mention of dance. He and I avoided doing any sort of activity like this, and I knew what was going to come next after they finished their dance. Ayra and Haider came down from the small stage they had set up, and began dancing to the song Malli played for them.

I was never blessed to actually be able to go through all these ceremonies, our wedding was a simple one, a colorless one, one without laughter, without emotions. . . One of helplessness. . .

"They look good together." Samar said softly, "She looks happy."

Swallowing harshly I say, "Haider is a good man, I am sure he will always keep her smiling like this."

"This reminds me of Api and Bhai's wedding, Remember you and I had danced together?" What was he trying to do? I didn't want to remember those things. I had pushed back those memories so far, that I had made sure I never remembered and thought of them again.

"Yeah,"

"And then at Amal and I's wedding too."

"Mhm," I hummed

"Then never again." He said.

I look over at him, "Why are you bringing all of that stuff up?"

Samar shrugged, "Just wanted to check if you still remember."

"I remember" I confirm, "would like to forget though now."

He looked over at me, "Why?"

Because I am done. "It doesn't mean anything to me anymore. Those memories are just the calm before the storm that entered my life, and hasn't gone away since Samar."

"There is always a way to run away from a storm Waliyah."

"Yeah well," I breathed out heavily, "At the time I didn't want to run, but now I do."

Samar kept quiet for a bit as everyone began clapping for Ayra and Haider. Samar suddenly stood up extending his hand out for me. "Will you dance with me?"

I gave him a pointed look, and he smirked at me knowing I wouldn't reject him in front of everyone. "Of course," I said through clenched teeth, and let him pull me to where Ayra and Haider were standing. Samar pulled me close to his body, intertwining his fingers with mine, as his other hand rested on my waist. Atif Bhai, Api, Rabia, and Wicky Bhai joined in as well. Keeping my gaze away from his I look over to the side to see Amma smiling at us.

The smallest things seemed to make her happy when it came to Samar and each time I had to destroy her hope. Samar wasn't someone that changed, if he hasn't changed in the last four years then there is no way he will change now.

I have made up my mind. . . I want a divorce.