I feel something brush against my cheek as I slowly try to open my eyes. It probably feels like someone's fingers. I groan a bit as my whole body ache. Damn, it hurts! I struggle to shift my head, and it feels like I haven't moved it in a long time. My eyes flutter, taking time to adjust to the daylight, and then they begin to comprehend the sight in front of me. The first thing that I get to notice is my mom's face. She is sitting next to me on the bed as she pats my cheeks gently. I now realize that it was her hand that I felt moments ago.

I don't know why, but I get a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. I wouldn't say I am disappointed to see my mother first. It's just that I feel a slight tug at my heart, not finding Christopher to be the first one to look at. Because it was his face that I saw last before everything faded away in front of my eyes.

The moment she sees me open my eyes, she cries in joy. "Thank god! My baby is finally awake." She says, tears glistening in her eyes as she reaches to kiss the top of my head. I half-smile at her, feeling bad that I got her worried so much.

"You have no idea how much you scared all of us." She says, and my eyes go to Charlotte and Francis behind her. They walk towards me as I look in their direction. While Charlotte stands, Francis reaches out to sit next to me on the other side.

"You were passed out for three days," Charlotte says, her voice a bit quivery. She shakes her head then. "We are so happy to see that you are okay." Damn! I was unconscious for three days? It has been longer than I thought. So if I am not wrong, it's been two days since Christmas. I also now feel horrible for spoiling my family's Christmas time.

"Don't you ever play with us like that," Francis says and I look back at him. His eyes are filled with tears as he takes my hand in his and squeezes it lightly. I bite my lip, feeling more terrible about all this. He had always been such a brave man. I've never seen him cry before, and watching him like this just breaks my heart. God, I caused so much pain to all of them. "We thought we almost lost you."

My eyes moisten too, but I try hard not to cry. "I am fine now, Francis." I reach and wipe a tear off his cheek and smile. "Jeez, don't cry. You look ugly while doing it." I pinch his cheek, trying to lighten the mood, making him laugh in between his tears.

After talking for a while with them, I look around. I didn't realize it before but I observe now that I am in a hospital room. How did I get here? The last thing I remember was being in my dad's lap before Christopher went out to search for Millie and Martha. And after that everything blacked out.

I could still feel the dread rush all over my body when I remember Max pointing his gun towards Christopher. He was facing me so he couldn't see it coming, but I was able to witness it and my instant reaction was to save him from it. I was so terrified by the thought of losing him that I had to do something. I knew I couldn't let anything happen to him. So I pushed Christopher to the side with all my strength, and that's the moment when the bullet hit me instead of him. I literally lost my balance after that, but before I know I was in Christopher's arms. He had rushed to catch me, preventing my body from hitting the floor.

My eyes were turning blurry, and I wasn't in a state to comprehend what was going on. Accompanied with unimaginable pain, the blood flowing down my chest fucking horrified me, but it was nothing compared to the relief that I felt from seeing that Christopher was uninjured. I still remember the look of terror on his face. He was probably scared for me, but it didn't bother me. As long as he was safe, I knew I was going to make it through.

But I have no freaking idea what happened after I fell unconscious? My mind instantly goes on a search for Christopher. He is the only person that I want to see the most at this moment. Where is Christopher? Is he okay? Suddenly I feel a sense of horror and I gasp.

"Christopher? Where is he? Is he fine?" I ask, searching all over the room in a hurry.

When I don't find anyone else in the room behind them, I turn towards my mother.

She turns her gaze away from me as soon as I look at her. Why is she not looking at me? Something doesn't feel right. I call her suddenly, having a dreadful feeling in my chest. "Mom?" When she doesn't respond, I place my hand over hers and furrow my eyebrows in concern.

She purses her lips and then turns to look at me. "He was there two days ago when they brought you here. But after that, we don't know where he went."

"What do you mean you don't know where he went?" I ask her with a frown on my face.

She doesn't say anything again, and I shake my head, feeling annoyed by her behavior. "Mom, please answer. I don't understand what you are saying?"

"Yes, Nikki. Mom isn't lying." Charlotte speaks, and I look at her. "We don't know where he went. He told us he would stay here and look after you during the night after the operation..." She looks at me and I watch her expression cover with worry as she continues. "Until we came in the morning. But the next morning when we got back, he wasn't here."

"He was gone," Francis adds disappointedly.

"You are saying he was here two days ago and now you don't know where he is? How is that possible?" I question them in total disbelief.

"How do we know? He just left without a word to anyone." Charlotte whispers.

I shake my head in disapproval, listening to their reasons. "I don't know anything. Just call him and ask him to get here. I want to see if he is okay."

Charlotte looks at me and bites her lip nervously as if I've asked her to do the most impossible job in this world.

"What?" I ask her when she doesn't seem to move from her place and get to call Christopher. I sigh, feeling frustrated with all their weird behavior. What the hell is wrong with them all? But then I realize something suddenly. "Ohh...How could I be so stupid? I forgot you guys don't have his number." I shake my head and say. "Get me my phone. I'll call him."

No one even tries to answer me, and it just pisses me off more. "Seriously? What has happened to you all?" I question, clenching my jaw. "Fine, if you are not gonna get it. I'll do it myself. Where is my phone?" I ask, feeling angry now as I begin to get up. And when I am about to rip my IV tube, I feel a sharp pain under the bandage plastered over my chest. I wince, but still, don't back off from getting out of the bed.

"Nikki, you are gonna hurt yourself. Stay down!" Francis reaches to stop me from getting up. "The doctor is yet to check on you."

"Nicole, please lie down." My mom grabs my other hand, looking worried as she tries to calm me down.

I shake my head frantically, not listening to them. "I fucking know nothing. I want to see Christopher right now. Please get him here."

"Nikki..." Francis reaches to hold me, and I smack his hand away.

"Fucking get him here! I want to see him." I scream hysterically, and everyone looks at me in absolute horror. Can't they fucking understand? I feel like I am gonna lose my mind if I wouldn't get to see Christopher in the next few minutes.

My mother looks stunned as she covers her mouth with her hand in horror, watching me go crazy. Charlotte looks at mom, and then she looks at me with her wide eyes. "I'll go get the doctor." She says before rushing out of the room.

"Please..." I cry, and Francis reaches against my protest and wraps his arms around my shoulders.

"I am sure he is alright." Francis cups my face and tries to console me. "Yes, Nikki. He was completely fine when he was here. Calm down. For god's sake, please..." He looks into my eyes and says. I look back at him and grab onto his shirt, suddenly feeling disoriented.

"Colby? Where is he? He would know where Christopher is. Please, at least call him." I whisper as my head begins to feel heavy. Before I know my grip loosens on him and my eyes close, making me fall back.

When I wake up again, I find my dad sitting in the same place where my mother was earlier. I instantly get back to my senses and begin to realize what happened before I fainted. Christopher! I was looking for him.

"How are you feeling, kid?" Dad asks me with a look of concern on his face when he notices I am awake.

He reaches to touch my arm, but I pull my hand away. "Don't pretend like you care." One glance at his face and I am reminded of all the bad things he has done. "Just when I thought I could trust you and forgive you, you had to do it. Why dad?"

He looks away from me when he realizes what I am talking about. "Why did you do it? Why did you lie to mom? To us?" I ask him, feeling my chest tighten.

"I am sorry, Nicole." He says in a low tone, still not looking at me.

"You have hurt every single one of us. Why did you do that to Max and his mother?" I ask him in disbelief when I recollect everything that Max revealed to us that day. "Do you realize you made a brother shoot his sister?" I shake my head and look again at him. "You ruined the life of an innocent kid. You turned him into a criminal. Why?"

He sighs and turns towards me finally. "I know you wouldn't believe any of this, but I love you guys so much. I didn't want to lose you. I love Julia more than anything, but you have to understand this job..." He pauses and swallows hard. "This job I do isn't easy."

I frown as he continues. "There were times when I was really frustrated with not finding proper leads for the cases I had in my hand. And after that, when I came home and had all those fights with your mother, I felt like needing a break. I wanted to get away from everything." He lets out a sigh of disappointment. "That's when I met Sammy. I thought I had a good time with her, letting go of all my worries. But it didn't take me long to get out of the trance I was in and realize that she was a mistake. Max was a mistake. I never wanted them." He tries to search my face, but I turn away, feeling more enraged with his confession. How could he try to defend himself in this? "That day when Julia came and asked me to come back to her, I realized how big a blunder I have committed."

Dad places his palm over my cheek and makes me look back at him. "Please forgive me, Nicole. I never meant all this to happen. I didn't know Max would do all this. I love you."

I stare at his face and pull his hand away from me. "Your love isn't going to compensate for the pain that you have caused all of us." He winces upon hearing my words. I know it has hurt him, but I am not going to feel bad for what I said because he needs to realize it. "Is it going to bring back Sammy? Is it going to save Max from being put behind bars? Is it going to erase this?" I finally ask, pointing to the place on my chest where I was shot.

My father doesn't seem to have an answer for all this, so he chooses to be quiet. There is a long silence after it, and I exhale deeply. Why the fuck we can't be a happy family ever? Why does it have to be always so painful and complicated? I close my eyes and try to calm my nerves, and Christopher's face suddenly appears in front of me.

I snap my eyes open and look at my dad. "Where is Christopher, dad?"

He studies my face for a minute and then purses his lips. "I don't know. He just left."

I frown and gaze at his face. "Do you have anything to do with it?" I don't know why that thought came to my mind.

"Why do you think so?" He asks raising his eyebrow.

"Because you never seemed to like him," I answer genuinely, reminding myself of how he talked about Christopher in front of Max.

"No... I have nothing to with where Christopher is." He shakes his head before turning again to look at me. "Listen, Nicole, you are not in a state to worry about him. I don't know where he is, but one thing I am sure about is that he is fine. He left on his own will and he would be back when he really wishes to." He keeps his face expressionless while I try to read what's going on in his mind.

When I am not able to get anything, I ask him straight. "Is he in any kind of danger? Is police behind him?"

He shakes his head in denial. "Nope...they are still investigating about Max, Peter, and... "

"And?" I ask when he lets it trail off.

"Richard's death." He sighs and completes the sentence.

"Richard is dead?" I gasp, completely stunned by his revelation. I didn't know about this. Is Richard really dead?

"Yeah...Max killed him during their fight." Dad says. I feel a bit of a shock for a minute, but then it's instantly replaced by a wave of relief that runs through my body when I realize that he is finally gone from Christopher's life forever.

"You should rest now. The doctor would come soon to check up on you again." He says. And as he stands up, I see Colby entering the room. He raises an eyebrow, looking at Colby, which makes him stops on his way.

"Dad, I need to talk with him," I say as I sit up on the bed and look at my dad so he could understand why he is here.

He looks at Colby for a moment and then turns towards me and nods. He doesn't leave as I watch him go and stand at the doorway.

When Colby walks in, I don't even let him speak as I say. "Don't tell me you don't know about Christopher either."

"I am sorry Nicole but I really don't." He says, keeping his head low, and it just makes my chest tighten more. I get disappointed even though I know I was expecting this. Maybe because he was my last hope.

"I can't believe this. Why would he leave?" I ask with a painful lump forming in my throat. "How could he do that?"

When he doesn't say anything, I shake my head, trying to keep my composure and ask him. "Did you try calling him?"

"It's not reaching." He responds.

"Where could he probably go? Do you have any idea?"

"I can find out but there are a lot of things going around right now so I need some time..." The moment he says that I can't keep it together anymore. My face crumples, and I burst into tears.

"Hey, don't cry." Colby reaches to me and wraps his arms around me. I bury my face into his shirt and cry as he holds me. "Look at me. You need to be strong, Nicole." He says after a moment.

He sighs, and I look up at him. I notice that my dad is standing next to him now. Colby doesn't say anything, but I know he is a bit tense with my dad being present here. He looks at him and then pulls away from me. "Maybe he just needs space. I know everything that he has been through..." His gaze darts for a moment between my dad and me before he finally focuses on me. "I know the truth about his accident and I am sure you know that too."

I look at him and nod. I want to ask him how he knows but I understand this is not the time for it.

"And after knowing everything that Richard and Max did to him, he might need some time for himself. You know he got betrayed by the two men that he trusted the most in his life." He looks at me and then adds. "And watching you like that didn't make it any easy for him. He needs time to heal."

I wipe the tears and glance at him. "He should have stayed if he needed help. Doesn't he know that I'll always be there for him?"

"He knows that, Nicole. I guess he just needs some time away from everything. I am sure he would be back when he feels alright." Colby smiles, and I see the doctor walking into the room behind him.

"Sorry to disturb you guys but I need to check on her." She says, looking at my dad and Colby. "Can you gentlemen excuse us?"

"Sure." My father nods before leaving, and Colby follows him, sending a small smile in my direction.

"Oh dear, have you been crying again?" The doctor asks me once they are out of the room as I look at her. She seems to be an elderly woman, and her soothing smile somehow brings a bit of relief to my aching heart. "You shouldn't be especially in this state." She scolds me in a motherly tone and I wipe my eyes, trying to look normal.

"Where is your husband? I haven't seen him since that day." She asks me as she checks up. "He was really devastated when he brought you here."

I look at her in confusion, but then realize that she might be talking about Christopher. I hesitate and look at her. "He is my boyfriend." I clear.

"Ohh..." She smiles sheepishly, then looks at me. "He must be really happy to get the good news..." She smiles widely at me again and asks, seeming genuinely happy about something. "Did your father tell him?"

I frown. "What?" What does good news mean? And suddenly I dread realizing what it could probably mean in this context. And her expression is indicating exactly towards it.

"Maybe he was trying to keep it as a surprise..." she speaks again, and this time it appears like she is talking to herself.

"I am not getting you," I say, trying to get her attention back to me.

"Oh, I think you don't know it either, do you?" She twitches her eyebrows and questions.

"I don't know what you are talking about, doctor?" I ask being desperate to know.

"We had the suspicion on the very first day when we removed the bullet. I wanted to let your boyfriend know about it once the operation was done, but your father stepped in, so I told him." She shrugs and looks at me. "And yesterday we just went through the test to confirm it."

"Doctor, you are scaring me," I say, already dreading about what's going to come next.

She lets out a small laugh, shaking her head, and then smiles. "You are pregnant."

                                                              ----------------------------

I place my palm over my stomach, resting on my bed, and close my eyes after taking my painkillers. My stitches are gone by now, though I still feel a bit of discomfort over the place of my fading wound. I got discharged yesterday after staying two weeks at the hospital. Thankfully, the bullet didn't cause any major organ damage. It was one reason why I managed to recover faster.

The day I gained my consciousness I learned the most shocking and also the most wonderful news of my life. I learned that I was pregnant. Yeah, I was utterly shocked. The doctor caught me completely off guard when she told me that. I am basically around 8 weeks pregnant and it feels freaking surreal to believe. All this time I had no fucking idea that I was carrying a tiny human inside me.

This pregnancy was totally a surprise for me. How the hell did this happen? I know I was on birth control, but I was also aware of the fact that you can never be certain about anything in this life. To be honest, I never pictured myself being a mother, not in the situation I was in, so it scared the shit out of me the moment I heard it. Usually, whenever a woman would ask me if I wanted to hold their baby, I was the kind of person who would shrug awkwardly and say 'I think you are doing it better. I am afraid I might drop your baby.' Yeah, totally me. It wasn't like I didn't like babies. I was just afraid that I wouldn't be able to handle them properly. I know that's weird, but it's true.

In my opinion, I was pretty good at managing animal babies than human ones. I guess because they are easy to take care of and definitely cause less mess. But as I think of this little thing taking form inside of my womb, I know I have to bring myself to accept the fact that I can't run from this responsibility. The thought is scary as hell, but I am sure of the decision I made.

My heart could never imagine taking away an innocent life before it even breathes in this world. Definitely not when it's gonna be a part of me and my life. And if I am going to bring this baby to this world, I might as well take the accountability of raising it into a worthy human. I would never want it to end up in a dark hole like Max did. I would never let my baby suffer the pain that my father caused his son. Part of me feels guilty for whatever happened with Max because of the reason that we share the same father. But I know I can do nothing to reverse whatever happened with him. However, I know I still have a chance in my hand to stop another kid from walking on his steps. So I make a decision to give everything to my baby that Max's parents couldn't offer him. I am going to cherish it with so much love that it would never have the feeling of being left out or think of taking up the wrong path as its consequence.

My heart fills with warmth when I think about this baby. Our baby. A baby that I and Christopher made with our love. The moment I remember about Christopher, my eyes fill with tears again. I still don't know where he is. I have been trying his phone since the day I found he left, but it has been of no use. I am worried, frustrated, helpless, and heartbroken all at the same time. I still cannot understand the reason behind him abandoning me like this.

Why did he do that? Especially after knowing that I was pregnant with his baby? I wonder if he even knows about it or not. I am pretty sure that my dad would have told him that. Then suddenly, the most horrifying thought strikes my mind. What if he abandoned me because I was pregnant? Thinking about it is really painful but I can not rule out that possibility. What if he didn't want this baby? That may be the reason he left.

No...I shake that disgusting thought out of my mind instantly. Christopher isn't like my father. He would never do that. Even if he didn't want this baby, he would have talked with me about it. We never had this discussion before so I really don't know his opinion on having a baby but one thing I am sure about is that he would never leave me without giving an explanation and that too for such a big reason.

My mind is still worrying itself with the thoughts of Christopher's whereabouts, but I am trying to keep it at a minimum because I know I can't afford to cause damage to this baby. I know this baby was strong enough to bear everything when the doctor detected its heartbeat during my first ultrasound. It has been all the way through with me, enduring whatever I went through. I am proud of it but it was all before I know I was pregnant.

Now, when I am aware of its existence, I wouldn't let anything happen to it or to me. I would try my best to protect it and avoid any chances of being careless. I belong to the medical field so I am well aware of what damage the mental trauma of a mother can cause to her baby. I wouldn't let that happen to my baby. No matter what happens, I am not going to invite complications for this little innocent thing. It deserves a happy life and I am going to make sure my baby gets it from the beginning phase of it inside of me.

I take a deep breath and try to reflect on all the good things that happened to cheer up my mood. Richard is dead. He is finally gone for good. It means that Christopher is free now. And it also makes me have the bitter realization that nothing bounds him to come back to me now. He is free to go wherever he wants. That single thought is enough to make me feel sick to my stomach. But then I remind myself of Colby's words. Maybe he really is right. No, I can't lose my hope. I should wait. I shouldn't jump to conclusions so quickly. Maybe he really is taking his time.

I am sure Christopher would come back. He would come back for me...for us.

My father updated me about Max and Peter getting arrested. Max has been charged for kidnapping, an attempt to murder, and murder, whereas Peter has been arrested against the charges of assisting him in his crimes. And it wouldn't be long before they start digging into his business details. Also, they are going to be presented for the trials soon.

I was glad about one thing that I got to meet Millie and Martha while they were still here. Their statements were recorded before they were sent back to their home back in LA. I had my statements recorded too while being at the hospital, and I am really thankful to my father that at least he kept his promise. He didn't let Christopher's name appear in any of this.

I was a bit tensed about everything happening. I had the knowledge that they could summon me to appear in the court during the trials, but my father suggested that I wouldn't be required, and considering my current medical condition he said he could take care of everything on his own. That relieves my anxiety a bit.

I am shaken out of my thoughts when I hear a voice. "Can I come in?" I look up and see my mother standing at the doorway. Things have been pretty tense at home since everyone learned about Max and dad. Mom hasn't spoken about it to anyone, but I know she is hurt and disappointed again for the second time.

"You don't have to ask mom." I shake my head and say.

She walks over to the bed and sits on it, placing her hand over my knee. "You have been through so much and you didn't even think of informing us. You should have told me at least the moment you were in trouble." She says worriedly, and I know what she means. I wasn't expecting to have this conversation, but I also knew I couldn't keep ignoring it for long.

I shake my head and say. "Christopher has never been a trouble to me, mom. I love him."

I wait for her to say otherwise or get mad at me, but she doesn't do that. Instead, she smiles at me, causing me to widen my eyes in surprise. "I know and I also know he loves you so much."

"You mean you are not mad at me?" I blurt.

"Of course not." She smiles, but then the happiness on her face fades away instantly. She lowers her gaze to her lap and says sadly. "I am just sorry for not being a good mother to you. I never tried to understand you."

"Mom...It's not like you weren't a wonderful mother. You were and you always will be." I reach for her hand and take it into mine. "You just got consumed more in winning dad back instead of..." I sigh, leaving it hanging. "I just never wanted you to fall on his feet. To let go of your self-esteem. He was never worth it."

She looks into my eyes, and I see tears glistening in them. "I wasn't like you, baby. I wasn't brave enough to raise my kids alone. I always believed that I needed a man to do that. I never gained the confidence to do all this on my own." She says in a low tone. "But as I look at you now. I understand how wrong I was. I am so proud that you didn't turn out like me." She looks up at me with a sad smile.

"Mom, don't say that." I move closer to her and wipe her tears with my thumb. "You just didn't realize it. You were always a strong woman. That's the reason I love you."

"I love you too." She says. Then she looks at me and hesitates. "I was wondering if I could accompany you?"

"You mean to LA?" I ask and she nods slowly.

"Mom, you don't have to. I am sure Christopher would be back."

"But you don't know when." She sighs and then shakes her head as I look at her. "I don't want to disappoint you anymore. I promise I wouldn't be a burden. Nicole, I really want to be close to you. Especially now, I can't leave you when you need me the most." She looks down at my stomach and says.

"What about Francis and Charlotte?" I ask.

"They aren't kids anymore. I am sure they can take care of themselves very well." She looks at me and says. "And once they are done with their school, they would be anyway leaving for university."

"What about Dad?"

She tenses a bit at the reference of my dad. But then shakes her head and looks back at me with a look of confidence on her face. "I think it's time that I worry more about my daughter and the little future that she is carrying in her belly."

I watch her for a minute in complete surprise. I can't believe she is saying this. "Thank you, mom." I smile and pull her into an embrace after that. I didn't expect her to say all that she said just now. My eyes begin to fill up with tears again, except this time I know they are happy tears. She hugs me and pats my back soothingly. It feels like a moment of our little celebration after everything that has happened in the past few days. I am so delighted to know that I wouldn't be alone anymore on this new journey. My mother would be there with me. But as I hug her, my mind again goes back to think about Christopher.

Christopher, where have you gone?

I am waiting for you.

We are waiting for you.