don't go
SEBASTIAN SAT QUIETLY next to Reyna on her queen-sized bed, his phone grasped tightly in his hand and his gaze fixed on the blonde fast asleep beside him—the blonde he had come to love more than anything in the world. He couldn't begin to understand what was happening at all; all he knew was that he was hurt and he was devastated and he didn't know what to do about it.
He had woken up that morning feeling happier than he normally did, and that was because of Reyna. The two of them, as Chris had pointed out, had sealed their relationship in the most intimate way a couple could. For some reason, his time with Reyna meant more to him than his time with Margarita and his time with Leighton, and even his first time at that hotel with the first girl he claimed he loved. Now that he was with Reyna, everything with them simply felt as if it had been done for nothing but pleasure. With Reyna, he not only felt pleasure, but he felt love, passion, and dedication.
All of that had been ripped away from him in a single second, though, only to be replaced by betrayal, hurt, and anger towards the girl he was so dangerously in love with.
The picture of Chadwick and Reyna from the day before—he couldn't get it out of his head. He couldn't get the sight of his best friend and his lover kissing another man out of his head. He couldn't get the look of pure happiness on her face as she did so out of his head either. He couldn't fathom the pain he felt because of it, and as the picture resumed its reign of terror inside his mind, he couldn't help but notice the pain he felt over Reyna cheating on him was worse than each and every single instance of pain inflicted upon him by Margarita's unfaithfulness put together.
Reyna stirred in bed beside him, and Sebastian bit his bottom lip as he watched her eyes beginning to flutter open. He was angry with her, angrier than he had ever been, but he was also upset. He looked at her and wanted to cry, but he also wanted to yell at her.
"Hi," Reyna cooed as she looked up at him, a smile on her face. It dropped, though, when she noticed the expression on his face.
She sat up quickly, grabbing a hold of his arm, only for him to shy away from her. "What's wrong, Sebastian?" she asked him, feeling slightly hurt due to his actions.
"I don't understand. . ." Sebastian trailed off as he looked at her, suddenly feeling worse than he had been when she was asleep.
"What do you mean? What's wrong with you, Sebastian? Why won't you let me touch you?" Reyna questioned him with furrowed eyebrows.
Sebastian didn't answer, and instead he handed her his phone. She gave him an estranged look before unlocking it, and the moment she finished punching in the passcode she was met with a picture, one that she never would've imagined seeing. It was a picture of her and Chadwick from yesterday she was sure—both of their outfits were what they wore on their outing with one another—but the aspect of the picture that stood out to her the most was the fact that she and Chadwick were kissing. . .on the lips. The only kiss she could remember Chad ever exchanging with her was when he had kissed on her the cheek, in a very friendly matter as well. She knew more than anyone that the picture wasn't real; it was edited, but it was edited so perfectly anyone would have a hard time believing so, including Sebastian.
"That's not at all what it looks like, Sebastian," Reyna tried to assure him as she handed him his phone back, though she realized last second that she could've chosen her words better.
Sebastian scoffed and got off of the bed, running a hand through his already-tousled brown hair. "Not what it looks like—that's hilarious. That's exactly what Margarita said to me after she cheated on me the first time, Reyna."
"Don't you dare compare me to Margarita, Sebastian Stan," Reyna chastised him. "I'm not her. Margarita never cared about hurting you. I, on the other hand, would never in a million years think of doing something like that to you."
"You're kidding me right?" Sebastian exclaimed, his hurt and anger getting the best of him. "Did you see the picture?"
Reyna nodded and got out of bed as well, pulling the hem of Sebastian's shirt down to rest above her thighs. "It's fake, Sebastian."
"Then why the hell was there an entire article from E! News to go with it?" Sebastian inquired. "People said they saw you two—they said they saw you two being 'overly friendly' with one another. What the hell am I supposed to make of that?"
"I dunno, bullshit maybe?" Reyna defended herself, though she feared it wouldn't amount to very much. "You know all these news sites wanna do is make money, and if they have to make up some bullshit story to do so they will."
Sebastian shook his head quickly and ran a hand over his face. "I don't think that's what's going on."
Reyna seemed slightly taken back by his words, unable to believe that he could ever believe some stupid news article over her. "You actually think I would do that to you?"
"You know I have a rough past when it comes to girlfriends who cheat on me," Sebastian sighed sadly, "I just wouldn't be surprised if you did. Every girl I've ever loved has done it, so why wouldn't you? It just sucks worse now because it's you."
Reyna shook her head and moved toward him, wrapping her small hands around his wrists. "I would never do anything to hurt you, Sebastian. You know me better than that."
"I thought I did."
He moved away from her as the tears began to burn in his blue eyes. The sight of it alone was enough to elicit a tearful reaction from Reyna. She could remember times in which Sebastian had been so upset he couldn't help but cry, and even then, as nothing more than just his best friend, she despised seeing him in such an emotional state. She hated seeing his normally bright and happy blue eyes filled with pain and sadness, and now, knowing that his tears were because of her—because of something she didn't even do, let alone would never in a million years do—pained her more than anything.
"Listen to me," Reyna said as she moved closer to him again, placing her hand on the side of his face. "I love you. I would never do anything to hurt you, Sebastian. Please. . .you have to believe me."
"I want to," Sebastian said, his voice strained. "But I've been hurt so many times, Reyna, and each time I go back only to get hurt again. I don't wanna do that again, especially not with you. You don't understand how horribly it hurts simply because it's you."
"Yes I do," Reyna told him as she wiped away a stray tear that had fallen down his face. "We've talked about it before, remember?"
Sebastian sighed and looked away from her; the only thing he could see when he looked at her was that picture; the only thing he could hear when he looked at her was his voice repeating the words in the article over and over again. It only made things worse. "I can't do this."
"Sebastian, please," Reyna squeaked as she attempted to grab his arm; he only moved away from her.
"I can't do this," he repeated to himself. "You're just like the rest of them. I can't do it."
Reyna opened her mouth to respond, but she couldn't find the right words to say to him. Nothing she said would fix this mess that had been so unfairly made.
"I need to go," Sebastian said quickly as he began gathering his things.
"Are you leaving me?" Reyna asked as a few tears fell down her face.
"I don't want to," Sebastian admitted as he glanced up at her. "But I need to do what's best for myself this time around—I need time."
Reyna shook her head and ran after him, latching onto his arm before he could make a move out the door. "Don't do this to me, please. Don't leave me, Sebastian. I need you."
"Do you?"
"Stop acting like that—of course I fucking need you," Reyna exclaimed as she attempted to pull him back into her apartment. "Please don't go, Sebastian. Please don't leave me. . ."
"I'm sorry," he said before ripping his arm from her grasp and fleeing the apartment, slamming the door shut behind him.
Reyna could only stand there staring at the closed door, trying to contemplate what had just happened. She wanted to go after him, but she knew that if he had wanted that, he never would've left in the first place, so she was left with the horrifying realization that she had once again lost the only person she had ever loved because of some sleazy news article hellbent on spreading lies in order to make money. She understood why Sebastian had a hard time believing it wasn't true, considering his past with females wasn't all that pretty, but she couldn't stand the fact that he had listed Reyna under the same category as them. Unlike them, she would never dream of hurting Sebastian in any way, shape, or form. Why would she want to hurt the person who meant the most to her?
After what felt like hours and hours of staring, Reyna was finally able to process everything. Sebastian had left her, and that had cut deeper than she thought it would, as did the feeling of being alone.
Reyna wiped the warm tears from her face and hurried back to her room, plucking her phone from her charger. She unlocked it immediately and began dialing the familiar number, already despising the feeling of being alone. She just wanted someone she knew would be there for her, despite the fact she preferred that someone being Sebastian.
The phone rang about four times before the person on the other end finally answered.
"Hello?"
Reyna couldn't help but succumb to her feelings in that moment, and she let out a sob, startling the person on the opposite line.
"Rey, what's the matter?"
"Anthony," Reyna sniffed. "Can you come over, please? I need—I just need someone, a friend."
"Of course, babes," Anthony answered her. "I'll be over in twenty minutes, okay?"
"Okay," she forced out before hanging up the phone.
She plopped down onto her bed and buried herself into her comforters and pillows, clutching Sebastian's tightly in her arms. It still held his smell, and although that wasn't enough for her, it would unfortunately have to suffice until she was able to get him back—if she was able to get him back.
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I LISTENED TO THE ENDING OF "I'M SATISFIED WITH MY CARE" FROM THE BIG HERO 6 SOUNDTRACK, AS WELL AS "CLOSURE" FROM THE CIVIL WAR SOUNDTRACK OVER AND OVER AGAIN WHILE WRITING THIS AND CRIED A LITTLE BIT, BUT OH WELL
I HOPE YOU'VE ENJOYED THIS
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