It's a brisk morning, but that never stopped anyone in Hasetsu, Kyushu. People walked and rode backs, cars driving back and forth along the roads. Yet it wasn't busy. It's never busy in Hasetsu. Actually, it's gotten worse. People leave, and businesses are closing.

    I sigh, looking out towards the water as I walk towards the hill with the temple on top. It was a beautiful day, despite the chill in the air that would make anyone pull their scarf over their nose. Other than the occasional car with it's tires rolling across the street, the only sound seemed to be the skidding of my shoes against the concrete. It's not like I was dreading going to my favorite place, but lately not even it could bring me joy. My best friend still wasn't back from losing the Grand Prix Final, and I wasn't sure if I was ready for him to be back. I mean, how do you comfort someone who at least managed to get to the Grand Prix Final?

    "At least he is out there living his dream, even if he's losing," I grumble,, tilting my head in thought. Admittedly, I'm jealous. No matter how much I push myself, strain my body, practice each technical I can think of, I just can't seem to get anything right. It's embarrassing, isn't it? Skating since young, but still skate like a baby horse learning to walk. Yuko Nishigōri, who has skated as long as I have and works at the skating rink, tries and tries, but I think she's also giving up on me.

      But skating is all I have.

      Another sigh escapes my lips.

     My family left Hasetsu a long time ago, not wanting to risk going bankrupt and moved to Tokyo to build their business. I never had the heart. I didn't want to leave Yuri. Unlike me, he's as graceful as a swan when he's not nervous and he can capture everyone with the beauty of his movements.

      He's my inspiration.

       Yuri tries to help me as well, which is why I've practiced endlessly. In my heart, I hoped that I could be good enough to make him proud while he was gone. But I feel as if I've made no progress.

        When I came face to face with the doors of the skating rink, my stomach twisted up and I wanted to run away. My feet felt like they had suddenly turned into stone with every step I took, saying hello to Yuki's husband, Loop, with a heavy heart, and sulked towards the locker room. Days like this, I wanted to turn away and just give up, but I would be disappointing Yuri.

        He spent five years chasing his dream, so I will do the same. The rink was silent, and it made me cringe with how loud I was being with my locker. It's like I disturbed the peace. After hoisting my bag onto a little hook inside, I then lifted myself onto my toes to grab my skates and gloves on the top shelf. Setting them onto the bench, sat down, unwrapped my scarf and shucked off my jacket and threw them both inside the green toned locker before closing it and locking it, tying the key onto my wrist.

      Through the repetitive looping and tying of my skates, I allowed my mind to wander. I was getting old and I never even made it through Ladies Japanese Nationals, which meant I've definitely never even been considered for Grand Prix.

      "25 already," I bitterly whisper to myself with a sarcastic smile, stepping out of the locker room and into the skating rink. It was early, so there was no skaters, but it wasn't likely there were going to be any at all anyways. No one skates in Hasetsu anymore.

       Taking my guards off, I plug my headphones into my ears, and slip onto the ice. On my Playlist was "King JJ". It was a catchy song, despite the skater being a bit of a prick. I just let myself follow through the music, let the rhythms and lyrics of each song glide through my body.

        Skating was supposed to be fun, so I took a deep breath and just emptied my mind. Today wasn't for stressing out my body.

       "Relax" I whisper under my breath to myself. Whatever my feet and body felt like doing, I followed through. I just did little hops. No need to hurt myself today. I hadn't mastered any flips or axels just yet unless they were singles, and I was tired of pushing myself with no results. And everyone else was tired of my lack of results as well.

        I always liked skating under new ice, I smile for the first time today at the smoothness under my skates. Overly skated on ice always was hard for me, the grooves catching on my blades every time. My focus leaves, and I'm transported into a world where I can hear the crowd clapping and cheering me on, where I can feel the spotlights heating up my back, where I can hear the announcer, and where I know the judges are watching my every move. Initially, nerves almost overcame me, but I remind myself that I cannot get nervous if this is my dream.

      In the background I heard clapping filtering in through my headphones and panicked. Knowing my little performance was lack luster, I expect to see Yuko and was about to apologize for not taking my small practice seriously. But, were my eyes deceiving me?

      "Yuri!" I exclaim seeing the younger skater opening his arms and race towards him. I braced for impact, expecting to land on a hard muscular chest, but it wasn't as I remembered. I pull back in shock and look him up and down.

      "Yah!" I exclaim, "Yuri Katsuki, did you stress eat?" I scold putting my hands on my hips. His wide smile turns into a pout.

       "You haven't seen me for five years and that's the way you greet me?" He grumbles, pout getting bigger.

        My heart ached and felt like it was tearing in two different directions. I pitied him, I did. I couldn't imagine the humiliation he must've felt, but I also couldn't stomach the thought that he is throwing away the talent I would kill to have. The longer he sulked, the stiffer I felt. Thankfully Yuki joined us and her and the girls celebrated Yuri coming home.

       My chest hurt as I buried my feelings and joined in on the teasing and joy, masking a smile onto my face that only broke and fell once I closed the door to my home and collapsed to my knees.