𝔸𝕧𝕒

I feel an intense pang of sorrow in my stomach and double over at the sensation.

"What's wrong?" Morgan asks, crouching beside me with a look of concern.

"It's Zane," I say. "He's in pain. Something's wrong. It's this... intense feeling of sadness—grief."

Kieran runs into the room with his brows furrowed.

"What's happening?" he asks.

I clutch my stomach and groan.

"Probably Shayatin," Morgan says. "Ava is feeling Zane's pain. She said it feels like grief. She's probably right, they hone right in on loss and pain."

"They're making him relive his worst memories?" I ask. "Like they did to Finn and Kieran?"

Morgan crosses his arms and nods.

"We've got to help him," I say. "What do I do?"

"Ava," Morgan says with a sigh. "You can't help him. We don't even know where they are."

"But he's in pain. He's suffering. If I can feel him, can't he feel me? Can't I, like... I dunno, send him good feelings or something?"

"I'm not exactly an expert on the Siren mating bond," he says. "I'm the wrong person to ask."

"Well we don't exactly have a Siren to ask right now," Kieran says.

"We could call Alek," I suggest.

"Do you have his number?"

"I- Crap, no, I don't have it." I huff in frustration and sit myself on the floor. "I hate this. Why can't I help him?"

Morgan sits in front of me and sighs.

"I know you want to help him," he says, "and we will. But right now, there's no way to help him. Not in this way. We'll find him and we'll find Kami and we'll make sure we get them out of there in one piece. But right now, he's on his own. He can handle this."

I'm overwhelmed by the emotions coming at me—fear, grief, sadness, guilt. I can't imagine what he's dealing with right now.

We sit for a few minutes in silence. I have no words for this situation.

In a flash, I'm overwhelmed with the intense memory of the moment Zane broke up with me. It's vivid, surprisingly so, almost like a waking dream. I gasp in shock.

"What was that?" Morgan asks.

"I- I don't even... a memory I think but I..."

"You could see Zane's memory?"

"No, it wasn't Zane's. It was mine, I think."

"Yours?" Morgan asks, his eyes popping open wide. "What do you mean?"

"It was me, in my house. It was something... from my past."

"You're remembering something from your past?"

"I guess so. I don't know... it was more intense than usual."

"Fuck," Morgan mumbles under his breath.

"What?" Kieran asks. "What's happening?

"They're somehow accessing Ava's memories," he says. "Through the bond no doubt."

"Is that bad?"

"If they can access her memories, then they can know what she knows, and more importantly—they know she's alive."

ℤ𝕒𝕟𝕖

I'm in a car driving down a road near Pike's in Port Charlotte.

But I'm not in the car so much as I am seeing inside the car. It's as if I'm seated where the dashboard should be.

Ava sits in the passenger seat and Mike in the driver's seat.

What is happening?

I can't talk or move other than to look side to side—I can only watch.

"The only reason I came there was for you," Mike snaps. "And then you start flirting with these guys that you mysteriously seem to know and it comes out that you had a hospital appointment that you didn't tell me about—I felt totally blindsided by the whole thing!"

Fucking prick.

If I could I'd punch him in his smug fucking face.

"I only know them because I showed one of them how to find his friend's hospital room," she says, "and I wasn't flirting with them."

Wait... she's talking about me?

This is the night that I picked her up on the side of the road. I had no idea their fight had anything to do with me.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you about the appointment," she continues. "I honestly didn't think you would have wanted to know. I promise. Nothing was going on. There's no conspiracy."

"Okay," he huffs.

What a bloody prick.

"So what was this appointment for?" he asks.

"Just another round of tests. They did an MRI and took more blood."

"And? What did they find?"

"It's too quick to tell. I think it's mostly to eliminate a few worst-case-scenario things. I doubt they'll come back positive."

"Worst case scenario? Like what?"

The fucker looks more irritated with her than he is actually concerned for her wellbeing.

"Um, brain tumors, cancer, the big dangerous things. I think they're just trying to cover their asses."

"Mmm..." He pinches his lips into a tight line as if she's just offended him in some way.

"What?"

"It's just interesting, that's all," he says, acting aggrieved.

"What about it?"

"I just... I didn't realize this was so serious."

As if he gives a shit about Ava's health. If there's one thing I've learned interacting with Mike, it's that the only person he cares about is Mike.

"I don't know... I hope not," she says, looking out the window. "I just want to find out what's going on at this point. If it's serious I guess I'd rather know than be ignorant. I just need an answer."

"I just wish I had known before," he says with a sigh. "I wish you had told me."

"What do you mean? I am telling you."

"I mean before all..." He gestures between them. "...this."

What?

That... this... this is why they broke up? Because he didn't want her to be sick?

"What do you mean by that?" she asks.

I struggle desperately in an attempt to say or do anything. Ava's trying to hold an unaffected expression, but I can see how much he's hurt her. I want to comfort her. I want to throttle him for hurting her.

"I mean I wish I had been able to make an informed decision. When we started dating, I didn't know you were sick. You didn't tell me you had all these problems."

Fuck.

I hate this motherfucker.

"Why?" she asks. "Do you not want to be with me?"

"I'm not saying that. I'm already in love with you. It's done now."

My gut churns and heat fills my lungs. I knew this guy was an asshole, but I didn't know just how stupid he was. Ava has always been better than he deserves, and here he is telling her that she wasn't good enough because she's ill?

"You would have chosen not to love me?" she asks.

"I dunno... Maybe... Yeah, I probably would have."

The broken look on her face nearly breaks me too.

"Fuck you!" she screams at him.

That's my girl.

"That isn't what we're looking for," a voice says. "Move along."

*****

I don't recognize where I am—it's a narrow hallway in a small house with beige walls and dark green carpets. A door opens and Ava steps out into the hall. Her usual purple hair is a dark brown and she looks different, younger.

She walks to another door that opens as she reaches for it. A teen boy nearly collides with her as he steps out.

"Hey Ava," he says, licking his lips.

"Hey," she mumbles.

I don't like how uneasy she looks.

"You looking for me?" he asks, stepping closer to her.

She crosses her arms and looks at the floor.

"Just trying to go to the bathroom," she says.

Another boy steps into the hallway, this one more familiar—her brother, Dylan. He has fewer tattoos and appears younger too, but it's definitely him.

"Jake, stop trying to fuck my sister," he says with a laugh. "You'll probably catch a disease."

"Fuck off, Dylan," she says, holding up her middle finger.

"Ava!" a man's voice calls from the end of the hallway. "What the fuck did you just say?"

"Dylan started it," she says.

"Get in here!" the man shouts.

She walks down the hallway with her shoulders slumped, emerging in the living room where her father sits in a reclining chair.

"What have I told you about starting fights with Dylan?" he says.

"I didn't start anything, he did," she says.

"You're just difficult. It's like you live to make problems."

"I'm not difficult. I was just trying to use the bathroom and Dylan started making jokes about me," she says with a sigh.

"Are you laughing at me?"

"What? No, I'm not laughing."

"Do you think I'm fucking stupid?" he asks, sitting up in his seat. His pupils are wide and he's covered in sweat.

"Dad, I'm no-"

"Shut up!" he shouts.

I feel my muscles tense. I want terribly to rip his limbs from his body. He's scaring her, intimidating her.

"It's no wonder people don't like you, Ava," he says. "You're a mouthy bitch."

I can't handle this. I try to close my eyes, but I can't.

"I wasn't laughing," she says.

He rips the phone from the cord connecting it to the wall and whips it at her. It hits her in the arm as she attempts to dodge it.

"Go to your goddamn room Ava!" he shouts. "I don't want to see your face again tonight!"

I'm going to kill this bastard.

*****

I'm in the penthouse with Ava, holding out my phone to take a video of her.

"Faith in what?" I ask. "The whole thing..."

"I know that you will never hurt me," she says. "I trust you."

I look back up at Ava and suddenly my arm swings out, hitting Ava in the cheek and knocking her to the floor.

No. No no no.

"Ava, fuck, that... I didn't want to do that," I try to say. "Please believe me. I don't know what just happened."

But I can't hear the words come out. It's like I have no voice.

"What about now?" I ask, my voice speaking without my mind's permission. "Still so sure?"

No. This is all wrong. Someone stop me, please!

"I..." she mumbles, sitting on the floor and holding her cheek.

"Oh, come on, Ava," I say, chuckling. "A moment ago, you were so sure of me. So much faith. Where did all that go?"

How can I fucking laugh right now?

"Whatever's happening, Zane," she says. "This isn't you. We can fix this."

As always, Ava has faith in me. It's her faith in me that has built my own faith in myself.

"Oh really?" I ask, opening the video on my phone send it to an unsaved number.

Wait... Isn't that my number? Am I sending it to myself?

"What's wrong with you?" I ask.

"Well, you did just hit me in the face and stuff, so I'm pretty sure I'm not feeling too great about that."

"Is this what we're looking for?" a voice says.

Where did that come from?

"...You're onto me, so let's cut the crap," I say.

Fuck. It's Asmodeus.

"Asmodeus," the voice says. "It's him. He has the girl, but he's not killing her."

"This is it. We have it," another voice says. "Just let it play out from here."