I push Eve up against the wall as we kiss, not letting my mind think even the slightest. My hands rest on either side of her head, my palms pressed flat against the wall. I honestly don’t remember the last time I kissed a girl, not since Kelsey. And even though a small part of me is screaming to stop, the other part knows that it can’t.

“Fallon,” Eve gasps, pulling back. “What are we doing?”

“What are we doing?” I laugh quietly, letting my lips gently kiss her neck. “You’re the one who kissed me.”

“But I shouldn’t have,” she whispers, pushing me back.

“Why not?” I don’t move from where I have her pressed against the wall, but I stare at her intently, waiting for her response.

“Because this could just be like any other kiss to you,” she whispers, moving her eyes to the floor. “I could be just like any other girl. This could be-“

“Eve,” I laugh, pressing my finger to her lips. “Trust me, it’s not, you’re not.”

“Are you sure?”

“Positive,” I smile, moving my head closer to hers. Again, we’re kissing, losing sight of everything else except for each other. I feel like I’m forgetting something; something important, however the more I think about it, the farther it feels. So when I stop thinking and let my brain take a break, I feel Eve start to lift my shirt up over my head.

She throws it to the floor, kissing me harder. Before things get too out of hand, I stop her, pressing her arms against the wall so she can’t let her actions get the best of her.

“Are you sure about this?” I ask between breaths. “Are you sure you’re okay where this is going?”

“Positive,” she grins, copying what I had said earlier. She wiggles her arms out of my grasps and clasps her fingers together behind my neck, pulling me back to her lips.

Things are getting out of control, and soon there’s a small pile of clothes on the floor beside us. It’s not everything, but it’s enough to make me stop thinking entirely. I let Eve take control, slowly dragging me towards my room. We’re only a few steps away when I hear the sound of something falling behind us.

“Fallon?” Kelsey screeches from the start of the hallway. Her bags sit on the floor around her as she glares at Eve and I, her fists clenched at her sides. “What the fuck is going on?”

Slowly, I detach myself from Eve and step towards our clothes, grabbing my shirt and throwing Eve’s towards her. I buy myself time to figure out what to say by putting it on, however when I’m standing directly in front of Kelsey, fully clothed, I’m speechless.

I rub my palm across my forehead as she waits for some kind of answer, but I still have no response. Both shock and embarrassment watch over me, with also, a small, horrible, chunk of love for Kelsey.

As she stands in front of me, her blonde hair hanging in waves over her baggy grey tank top, I can’t help but see the old Kelsey; the sober Kelsey. I can’t believe that I forgot today is the day she was coming, and that she just walked in. More importantly, that she walked in on me and Eve.

“Out,” Kelsey snaps, glaring at Eve. She points to the door behind her, her voice serious. Eve gives me a look to say something, to tell her that she can stay. But instead I avoid her gaze and stare at the floor as she rushes past Kelsey. “I thought you were my friend,” she mutters, slamming the door while Eve is still walking through it. She has to jump out of the way as the door makes a loud bang behind her, separating us.

Then, as if the incident never happened, a smile spreads across Kelsey’s lips and she runs to me with open arms. “Fallon!” She calls, stretching out my name in the annoying way I hate. She wraps me in her arms and I stand there, not returning the hug. I have no idea how to feel; how to act.

“I’m sorry,” I mumble, avoiding her eyes as she pulls away. “I forgot that you were coming today.”

“That’s okay,” she says, brushing her hair behind an ear. Her eyes grow wide as she becomes excited. “Where?” She grabs my wrist and gives it a small shake. For a moment, I think she knows about what happened to me, but then she looks down the hall towards the baby’s room. “Where’s Tyson?”

“I don’t think it’s a good idea just yet,” I mumble, grabbing her shoulder before she can pull away.

“Why not?”

“You know why, Kelsey,” I sigh, meeting her eyes.

“He’s my son, Fallon.” Her tone is harsh as she stares at me intently. “I should be allowed to see him.”

“Then maybe you should have acted like it when he was born,” I snap, yanking her back towards me as she tries to head down the hall again.

Kelsey gasps, staring up at me with tear-filled eyes. She takes a step back, pulling out of my grasp and staring at me with hurt written all over her face.

“Why do you think I’m here right now?” Her voice is quiet but each word sounds like it’s being screamed in my ears. “Do you think I came for money? For drugs? For a place to stay?” When I don’t respond, giving her my answer without having to speak, she shakes her head, more tears running down her cheeks. “I came here for Tyson, Fallon. I came here for you.”

“I don’t want to sit here anymore,” I mutter to Erik. I throw the empty Vodka bottle onto the floor and it clinks against the empty beers. “Let’s get out of here.”

“I don’t think that’s such a good idea,” Erik responds, watching me with worried eyes. He thinks I’m drunk; that I’m going to black out. However no matter how much I drink, the news I received last night will always sober me up.

“I don’t care what you think.” After I stand up, I head to the front door of my house, Erik hurrying after me.

“Fallon, stop!” He calls as I barrel into the deserted street. If he catches me, he’ll make me go back. But what’s the point in going back to my parent’s empty house? They’re not there, so why should I be?

I sprint faster, turning down streets I pick at random. By the time I reach somewhere in the bad part of downtown, Erik’s lost me. I throw my hood up and keep my head low, avoiding meeting eyes with sketchy looking strangers that like to hangout downtown at two in the morning.

My fists clench at my sides as I repeat the conversation I had yesterday over and over again in my mind. This can’t be happening; they can’t be gone.

“-pass me it,” someone says. I turn left and look down the dark, hazy looking alley where a circle of three guys stand, all hunched over, hiding something. I watch as one leans down and sniffs, groaning as he straightens out, inhaling the substance.

I dare a step closer, watching them. Normally I wouldn’t be here at this time, or even hang around people I don’t know, but right now, I don’t care. I watch, labeling their drug as cocaine.

“We’re got a sneak.”

My head snaps up and I blink a few times, realizing that they now know I’m here. In hindsight, I should have at least tried to hide but my foggy head didn’t help when ignoring that decision.

“Get over here, asshole!” One of them calls, waiting for me to come to him. I consider running, sprinting down the street away from them. But there are three of them and one of me, and each one of them is doped up on speed, ready to run.

Slowly, I take a few steps towards them until we’re only a few feet apart. They watch me for a few silent moments, assessing me.

“He didn’t run,” one of the hooded figures says. The guy to his left is holding a mirror, watching me for any sign that I’m going to book it out of the alley. “Maybe he’s curious?”

The guy holding the mirror cocks his head to the side, a small smile appearing on his lips. “Are you curious?” When I don’t respond, he takes a small baggy out of his pocket and pours cocaine on the mirror. “The price isn’t cheap.”

“I’d rather not,” I mutter, smirking. “I’m not a coke-head.”

Instead of getting mad, the three guys burst into laughter, the one in the middle barely able to hold his drugs in his hands.

“This isn’t coke, moron,” he laughs, shaking his head at me. “It’s meth.”

Without thinking, I lean towards the outstretched tray, putting my face close to the mirror. I look at my dark reflection, one of the only things I can really see fully. Closing my eyes, I inhale and jump back, gripping my nose.

The guys laugh as I try to stop the burning pain, but as soon as it came, it’s gone, like it never happened. Then, I’m flying.